Konnektions146: nice one, i can do stuff like this, i ve even did a background check severally on dates .

i would do same to anyone i care about but i may have to inform the person and make sure he is cool with a check.

people getting smarter.

baby_123:

My point exactly. It comes across as the parents being too concerned about money. Your daughter, who you raised should know better. My dad may only get to know the family and family background, but i dont think he would have gone that far. Its quite suggestive of greed and open to various interpretations. I would never bring a criminal element home, and they trust me on this. WHAT! I would have been solely on my own.

Vikin:
It happened to my younger sister, this one from South Africa came calling to marry my sister. My dad enquiry about his job and he said he was a lecturer in SA.

Anyway, Popsi demanded on the condition that him ( Popsi) wil visit his office in SA before giving out his precious daughter.
The guy demanded for my sister to visit or my dad should google the Internet and find out about the school himself.

Anyway, Popsi said that he will do the visit not his daughter.

It never work out though, she is now with her new hubby.

Poster, parents do this to make sure their children don't go into a marriage that will probably fail or bring trouble to their wards. Especially the Igbo ppl, they believe in marriage is for better for worst. Let him come over to visit your friend, he shouldn't be worried if he has nothing to hide.

Orikinla: YOU definitely must be joking.

Two thumbs up.

Majority of poor people are married couples in the ghettos, because the poor men married when they were not capable of starting a family.
To majority of Nigerian men, starting a family means impregnating women without even the provisions for the proper welfare of the children.
The most evil and wicked thing is to have a child in poverty and make the innocent child suffer in want and misery.
As we always say, DON'T BREED THEM IF YOU CANNOT FEED THEM.

Vikin:
It's not about being hungry, with what the society is turning into, I don't blame them trying to know where their daughters are being married into

Vikin:

My dad did similar thing, her graduate doctor that he had spent a fortune on, then one man just come to claim that he is blah blah blah from SA. The old man requested for flight ticket oh! Lol....

Ok the flight ticket thing was taking it too far! But

The thing was that, he didn't really like the guy and hearing so much on drug life is SA, the man begin fear oh.
Good it didn't work out, if not, maybe my sister would be the one carrying the burden if it turns out the guy was into drugs..

hbabe: I think some people are getting it wrong. The check may not be to find out how rich the guy is but just to sure he has a source of livelihood. The father may not be doing the check out of greed as some have suggested but out of concern for the daughter's welfare.
Comparing this situation to virginity/fertility test is just absurd.

coogar:

by the same token, where's the trust? why would a father-in-law not trust me via face value? follow me to my place of work to find out if i am employed? after then what else? spërm motility test? psych evaluation? that's arrant nonsense!

ok, let's flip the script, how many of today's women would follow their mother in law to a clinic to have a virginity test or fertility test?.......by the same token, there are lots of women who have done multiple abortions with their wombs completely removed.....

using your own words, i wouldn't blame any mother in law trying to know who her son is getting married to cos there are plenty of damaged goods out there in today's world! if women have nothing to hide, they should follow their mother in law to such clinics and have the test.


i rest my case!

baby_123: Hugry family. Your cousin should hold his ears and flee. To prevent stories that touch which will wreck him in the future. He will most likely be taking care of this mans responsibilities. . God forbid any of my brothers marry into such.

jemecks: I followed my cousin to see the parents of his proposed wife,,on getting there we introduced our selves and presents the wine as custom demands in ibo land, then my cousin made known his intention to the girl's parents.

To my greatest surprise the dad asked my cousin his work and he told him,so after discussing with them we took our leave with the promise to come back as soon as they are through with inquiries, in order to pay her dowry, but to our greatest surprise the dad of the girl insisted that he must visit my cousin in his office or company and monitor the office for some time before he will give his daughter out to him.

plz Nairalanders what do u think this man is up to, i need your contributions and advice because my cousin is considering breaking up with her .

fubbyy: I disagree and detest the man's attitude to the highest order, what if he visits, finds out that the guy is real then gave his daughter out and 2morrow something happened and the guy became poor, what will he do?

He acted as if he's selling his daughter which we don't do in igbo land

The daughter should be the one doing the findings not the man

Tstark:

Thank you sir! Unless the fatherinlaw raised a fool and doesnt trust her judgement

yuzedo: Nobody wants his in-law posing as a GM to end up in reality, a meat-seller at Oshodi....

Bawss1:

The good ol' NL Family Section flip right there!

How would the ladies feel if they were at the receiving end of this "background check"?

Nice one

COOLDUN:

Is meat selling a crime again? it is this kind of marriage suitors screenings that push people to claim what they are not. Some people mistake these greedy parents as people who love the well being of their daughters, Lie, these parents are looking for men that will carry their liability families.Some of them do have fully grown up men who are not doing anything, just there waiting for a man who will be their victims as an in-law. Financial status of a man is not supposed to be the first question in these greedy parents interview lists of questions.That is why you see a lot big girls living alone and destroying the young and innocent girls into believing that marriage is nothing to be worried about, because they foolishly allowed their greedy parents to scare away their destined husbands with greediness. Their new slogan is age is only but a number. Igbo ones used to say DI GBAKWAA OKU.

They are busy attending the weddings of the ugly but wise girls, wearing expensive dresses to attract the sons of Dangotes,Odetola, Adenugas and Babangidas, who will marry them and their entire lazy families.Nonsense.

Orikinla:

Two thumbs up.

Majority of poor people are married couples in the ghettos, because the poor men married when they were not capable of starting a family.
To majority of Nigerian men, starting a family means impregnating women without even the provisions for the proper welfare of the children.
The most evil and wicked thing is to have a child in poverty and make the innocent child suffer in want and misery.
As we always say, DON'T BREED THEM IF YOU CANNOT FEED THEM.

StateOfMind:

Coogar's analogy is totally out of place here. This father's concern isn't out of greed, I believe he only wants to make sure the daughter he raised for years isn't falling into wrong hands. It doesn't necessarily mean he doesn't trust his daughter's judgement, all he wants is to see for himself, and if that's a criterion to marrying his daughter, then so be it.