coogar:

and it's men's fault that the society wants her married? your title is flawed, change it and you would get a more balanced view. men are not the reason women are pressured into marriage. more often than not, men just want sex!

[CHocolaTE:
]SERIOUSLY? WHY?

Why on earth do you people think that women will keel over and die if they don't get married?
Why do you think women are just dying to get married or get you hooked?

Day after day on Nairaland I see posts by men that talk about how some female celebrity is approaching her 30's and is not married or how some other ladies will never get married because of one reason or another as if these women told you that their lives cannot continue without marriage.

Why on earth do you people think Nigerian women are desperate to get married to you?
See eh, the reason why majority of women seek marriage is because of societal pressure from people that cannot mind their business and because they want to have kids that will not be called bastards so you better understand that fact.

Marriage hardly benefits women (except the very few lucky ones that married considerate men) so why do you think they are dying for it?
Husbands come home from work and expect a hot/good meal which the wife is supposed to have prepared; it is hardly ever the other way round and it is very rare for a woman to come home and meet that her husband has prepared something for her to eat yet this is something men enjoy all the time.
Men just stay by the side and watch while their wives whine in pregnancy pains and face the pains of being pregnant for months; imagine the struggles of getting the kids ready for school while fighting early morning sickness.

She works to assist you and must still submit to your whims because society expects her to, and you still expect sexxual gratification when you come home not considering that she is probably exhausted.
Also, after marriage the husband clearly enjoys his life and freedom more than the woman. he can close from work and 'hang out with the boys' instead of going home and nobody queries him, but his wife can never try such, she goes home straight to take care of children, does the cooking and cleaning and what not. She even has to take a break from work sometimes to pick the kids from school and drop them at home then go back to work before finally returning home at the end of the day to carry house work solely on her head because the majority of Nigerian men are lazy asses that think that helping their wives at home is an abomination.

After all the stress of doing housework on her own and taking care of children on her own she starts to look old and tired and her husband complains that she is now too old and unattractive and without thinking twice, he begins to look outside at younger women because his wife is no longer attractive to him.
The worst part is that the children the women is taking care of, the children that she got so stressed for and losses her beauty after birthing are bearing the man's name. The children bear his name and not hers and yet the men will have the effrontery to say that their wife is no longer attractive after bearing these kids so they want to chase other women.

What do women even gain from marriages for heavens sake?
People expects them give up your identity and start bearing their husbands' name, the kids you spend your life taking care of bear his name and claim his home town when they are asked where they come from, the man is very very likely to cheat on his wife and maybe infect her with some STD or another and he will more likely than not, turn her into his slave by refusing to assist with house work while expecting her to contribute financially to the upkeep of the house.
In fact, if not that religions make childbearing outside marriage a sin and society(mostly men) treat unmarried girls like outcasts, I'm sure many women will not get married, who in their right senses will want to marry an overbearing, unhelpful, slave driving no-good lazy ass; which majority of men are, when they can just have their kids in peace and not have to worry about taking care of him?

All of you can relax, eh kwa?
Women are not in any hurry to become your slaves.
Enough of the marriage this and marriage talk you keep disturbing our ears with.


Lastly, I know that not all married men think that women are on earth to be their slaves, I know that some kind and thoughtful men still exist there so this message does not apply to them.
Kudos to the 2% of Nigerian men that still have respect for women and consider their feelings after marriage.
I salute you.

...if u want to know who liked ur post,...I did

[CHocolaTE:
]SERIOUSLY? WHY?

Why on earth do you people think that women will keel over and die if they don't get married?
Why do you think women are just dying to get married or get you hooked?

Day after day on Nairaland I see posts by men that talk about how some female celebrity is approaching her 30's and is not married or how some other ladies will never get married because of one reason or another as if these women told you that their lives cannot continue without marriage.

Why on earth do you people think Nigerian women are desperate to get married to you?
See eh, the reason why majority of women seek marriage is because of societal pressure from people that cannot mind their business and because they want to have kids that will not be called bastards so you better understand that fact.

Marriage hardly benefits women (except the very few lucky ones that married considerate men) so why do you think they are dying for it?
Husbands come home from work and expect a hot/good meal which the wife is supposed to have prepared; it is hardly ever the other way round and it is very rare for a woman to come home and meet that her husband has prepared something for her to eat yet this is something men enjoy all the time.
Men just stay by the side and watch while their wives whine in pregnancy pains and face the pains of being pregnant for months; imagine the struggles of getting the kids ready for school while fighting early morning sickness.

She works to assist you and must still submit to your whims because society expects her to, and you still expect sexxual gratification when you come home not considering that she is probably exhausted.
Also, after marriage the husband clearly enjoys his life and freedom more than the woman. he can close from work and 'hang out with the boys' instead of going home and nobody queries him, but his wife can never try such, she goes home straight to take care of children, does the cooking and cleaning and what not. She even has to take a break from work sometimes to pick the kids from school and drop them at home then go back to work before finally returning home at the end of the day to carry house work solely on her head because the majority of Nigerian men are lazy asses that think that helping their wives at home is an abomination.

After all the stress of doing housework on her own and taking care of children on her own she starts to look old and tired and her husband complains that she is now too old and unattractive and without thinking twice, he begins to look outside at younger women because his wife is no longer attractive to him.
The worst part is that the children the women is taking care of, the children that she got so stressed for and losses her beauty after birthing are bearing the man's name. The children bear his name and not hers and yet the men will have the effrontery to say that their wife is no longer attractive after bearing these kids so they want to chase other women.

What do women even gain from marriages for heavens sake?
People expects them give up your identity and start bearing their husbands' name, the kids you spend your life taking care of bear his name and claim his home town when they are asked where they come from, the man is very very likely to cheat on his wife and maybe infect her with some STD or another and he will more likely than not, turn her into his slave by refusing to assist with house work while expecting her to contribute financially to the upkeep of the house.
In fact, if not that religions make childbearing outside marriage a sin and society(mostly men) treat unmarried girls like outcasts, I'm sure many women will not get married, who in their right senses will want to marry an overbearing, unhelpful, slave driving no-good lazy ass; which majority of men are, when they can just have their kids in peace and not have to worry about taking care of him?

All of you can relax, eh kwa?
Women are not in any hurry to become your slaves.
Enough of the marriage this and marriage talk you keep disturbing our ears with.


Lastly, I know that not all married men think that women are on earth to be their slaves, I know that some kind and thoughtful men still exist there so this message does not apply to them.
Kudos to the 2% of Nigerian men that still have respect for women and consider their feelings after marriage.
I salute you.

Amelian: Sighs.....op don't allow issues of men dissing singles sisters about not getting married affect you..when u see posts of men talking bad abt women or talking about how to get married, u simply overlook such posts, and read better ones that has to do with enlightenment.. I don't bother myself reading such posts anyways .... Am in my early thirties, am comfortable and beginning to enjoy the different flavours of life.. When I was in my twenties, due to my flashy look, I cut out certain normal things that would. Ordinarily make a lady happy, due to mindset of most nija.. Examples, don't wear lovely earrings o, don't look fly in your dressing, even though u dressed responsibly, the word is dress like a girl suffering, then a suitor will come ... And also If u can afford a car, don't buy o, oresle no man will marry u. ... I have good paying job, which could buy me a small car but most of my frnds and family kicked against it... Ha! Don't buy a car o... Always trek to work or take bus, or climb bikes, so that a man will want to marry u... I trek taya . Run after moving buses , climb okadas, it's by the grace of God , my legs are not broken. As I began to expand in biz, I surely need a car for easy mobility and keep to appointments.. No be person , tell me twice to go and buy a car. Enough of undue suffering to please a man, cause of marriage, which has more responsibilities that one can even imagine..
It's takes the grace of God, Selflessness of both husband and wife and great conscience involved to create and sustain a happy home... But how many homes , can boast of bliss after marriage... Just few...
Society , people can talk from today till tomorrow, the issue is no more suffering myself anymore for men.. If u can't accept my personality...the let me be...the period to enjoy my hard labour is hear... No dulling o... Just mix with like minded pple... That's sees yur vision.. U can't please everybody.. Follow yur heart , serve and leave the rest to God.
I repeat, don't bother yur eyes or brain reading and digesting posts of men dissing women.. Just close yur eyes on those posts and move on..... It's no use.. U can't stop them.. That's my simple advice .

Pataki: Now this is so wrong!

Yes men sometimes or usually spite a woman who is not yet married.

But more often than not, it is even women to women who spite themselves the most!

For example: when two ladies are fighting on this forum; it has become the norm, to use their various marital issues/problems has an insulting attribute to buttress their anger.

The pressure for marriage on a woman mostly does not even come from a man. It is mostly derived from several ladies the woman sees around her that are married and supposedly living a happily married life.

FLYFIRE: RANTINGS OF A FRUSTRATED WOMAN

1ndidi2:



We are all involved in this!I know of fathers that groom their daughters for marriage right from the womb cos dey believe women have nothing to offer

So also our mothers and relatives! It is hammered into ourHeads daily so automatically it becomes the norm.

We are all involved!! But to change that we can start from our generation of kids and make them know. Marriage is not the ultimate

collynzo2: This is very simple........ Assume there are no societal pressures, both men and women are free to decide to marry or remain single. How many percent of men and women will marry?
Answer that question sincerely.
If only you knew the fun in bachelorhood,

softy:

@OP, what is ur own personal plan concerning marriage??.....u wanna marry someday?.........because bad examples of marriage dominate ur area where u live DOES NOT connote men see women in marriage as 'slave'........!

Whether figuratively or literarily, your 2% about sane men that treat women right is just ridiculous.........so, 98% of men (whether married,aspiring,undecided) are INSANE (treats women like gabbage)?

Nigeria is blessed with both bad women and men as a group, and others as good ones!

What is ur parental background?......can u explain the kind of love you learn from them?

If u are not a feminist, don't act like one.

To tell u as a fact, some married women are very bad, even transfer the bad habits to their daughters!.......and the cycle continues!

What is ur point of bringing up a thread that shows who u really are- disturbed and bittered

My advice for u:
Make hay when the sun shines!
be ready to bring in good character whenever u are ready to get hooked!
Thanks.

softy:

@OP, what is ur own personal plan concerning marriage??.....u wanna marry someday?.........because bad examples of marriage dominate ur area where u live DOES NOT connote men see women in marriage as 'slave'........!

Whether figuratively or literarily, your 2% about sane men that treat women right is just ridiculous.........so, 98% of men (whether married,aspiring,undecided) are INSANE (treats women like gabbage)?

Nigeria is blessed with both bad women and men as a group, and others as good ones!

What is ur parental background?......can u explain the kind of love you learn from them?

If u are not a feminist, don't act like one.

To tell u as a fact, some married women are very bad, even transfer the bad habits to their daughters!.......and the cycle continues!

What is ur point of bringing up a thread that shows who u really are- disturbed and bittered

My advice for u:
Make hay when the sun shines!
be ready to bring in good character whenever u are ready to get hooked!
Thanks.

[CHocolaTE:
]
Oh my goodness, not again.
Not every woman wants it biko, your census was not accurate. They do it, but not necessarily because they want it.
They just don't want to be stigmatized. They want a life free of stigma, not a marriage of slavery and servitude.

biolabee:

so uncalled for.....

I thot u were a female poster

[CHocolaTE:
]

honeric01:

70% of men likely never going to marry if given thr chance and if free sex is not frown upon by the society.

Women naturally are builders, in building, you need foundation, marriage is one major aspect of the foundation, the day that aspect's removed, the day buildings begin to crumble.

We can all see what single-home is causing to morals (excluding the widows/widowers)

Onyegecha: That is a lie. The pressure is built into them by the menfolk through the socialization techniques they carefully created to keep women's psyche tied to men. I am glad some women are waking up to reality. Yes, if it's not working, quit. If you don't find someone you are very very very comfortable with, don't get into marriage. Do not marry for better or for worse. The moment love leaves the marriage, the woman should be wise enough to follow suit.

devour129: if you read my post you won't have to ask that question . I have never insulted any single lady before but these chicks are pushing it. Why do they always like to make out us married ones like we are living in bondage or only managing our lives cos we still live in the Stone Age ? I can begrudge anyone to think and feel whatever makes them sleep better at night but don't spoil the notion of marriage for our younger generation coming up. If your parents marriage ddnt work,try make yours work so your kids can learn from you not talking trash here. Am going to boast here YES SOME OF US HAVE IT ALL,some are still working on there's and some are almost there. If you not married its your choice but don't come here acting like you are all that ! Bee baby that was the point am trying to make,sorry it offended you.

[CHocolaTE:
]SERIOUSLY? WHY?

Why on earth do you people think that women will keel over and die if they don't get married?
Why do you think women are just dying to get married or get you hooked?

Day after day on Nairaland I see posts by men that talk about how some female celebrity is approaching her 30's and is not married or how some other ladies will never get married because of one reason or another as if these women told you that their lives cannot continue without marriage.

Why on earth do you people think Nigerian women are desperate to get married to you?
See eh, the reason why majority of women seek marriage is because of societal pressure from people that cannot mind their business and because they want to have kids that will not be called bastards so you better understand that fact.

Marriage hardly benefits women (except the very few lucky ones that married considerate men) so why do you think they are dying for it?
Husbands come home from work and expect a hot/good meal which the wife is supposed to have prepared; it is hardly ever the other way round and it is very rare for a woman to come home and meet that her husband has prepared something for her to eat yet this is something men enjoy all the time.
Men just stay by the side and watch while their wives whine in pregnancy pains and face the pains of being pregnant for months; imagine the struggles of getting the kids ready for school while fighting early morning sickness.

She works to assist you and must still submit to your whims because society expects her to, and you still expect sexxual gratification when you come home not considering that she is probably exhausted.
Also, after marriage the husband clearly enjoys his life and freedom more than the woman. he can close from work and 'hang out with the boys' instead of going home and nobody queries him, but his wife can never try such, she goes home straight to take care of children, does the cooking and cleaning and what not. She even has to take a break from work sometimes to pick the kids from school and drop them at home then go back to work before finally returning home at the end of the day to carry house work solely on her head because the majority of Nigerian men are lazy asses that think that helping their wives at home is an abomination.

After all the stress of doing housework on her own and taking care of children on her own she starts to look old and tired and her husband complains that she is now too old and unattractive and without thinking twice, he begins to look outside at younger women because his wife is no longer attractive to him.
The worst part is that the children the women is taking care of, the children that she got so stressed for and losses her beauty after birthing are bearing the man's name. The children bear his name and not hers and yet the men will have the effrontery to say that their wife is no longer attractive after bearing these kids so they want to chase other women.

What do women even gain from marriages for heavens sake?
People expects them give up your identity and start bearing their husbands' name, the kids you spend your life taking care of bear his name and claim his home town when they are asked where they come from, the man is very very likely to cheat on his wife and maybe infect her with some STD or another and he will more likely than not, turn her into his slave by refusing to assist with house work while expecting her to contribute financially to the upkeep of the house.
In fact, if not that religions make childbearing outside marriage a sin and society(mostly men) treat unmarried girls like outcasts, I'm sure many women will not get married, who in their right senses will want to marry an overbearing, unhelpful, slave driving no-good lazy ass; which majority of men are, when they can just have their kids in peace and not have to worry about taking care of him?

All of you can relax, eh kwa?
Women are not in any hurry to become your slaves.
Enough of the marriage this and marriage talk you keep disturbing our ears with.


Lastly, I know that not all married men think that women are on earth to be their slaves, I know that some kind and thoughtful men still exist there so this message does not apply to them.
Kudos to the 2% of Nigerian men that still have respect for women and consider their feelings after marriage.
I salute you.

4bobo: [size=13pt]SEE WHAT LESBIANISM HAS CAUSED. DONT PRAY TO MARRY ,EH? DONT EVEN MARRY AT ALL. INFACT MAY YOU NOT MARRY, AS YOUR WISH.
BUT JUST TAKE A PICTURE OF YOUR SELF NOW, AND ANOTHER ONE IN THE NEXT 10-15 YEARS, AND SEE YOUR LIFE, AS YOUR SIBLINGS CHILDREN START TO CALL YOU ANTY AT 60 [/size]