Women so appealing but they are enemies of themselves

The guys are trying to prove the OP wrong by doing the exact thing she accuses them of! Lol!

@OP

Don't confuse NL and society. My mother, aunties, and grandmothers have been pressuring my sisters to get married forever. The men in my family don't give a s h i t. I would say that most of the pressures come from women. These men on NL say it as a form of insult. They themselves wouldn't marry these ladies; they haven't even married their girlfriends.

My dear, taking the words that the pranksters on the romance section say to heart tells me that you are a learner. Instead of giving yourself a heart attack on NL, you should go and find yourself a husband.

butta: Women so appealing but they are enemies of themselves

true.

born7win: @OP

These men on NL say it as a form of insult. They themselves wouldn't marry these ladies; they haven't even married their girlfriends.

gbam.

My dear, taking the words that the pranksters on the romance section say to heart tells me that you are a learner.

romance section or even nl itself.

Instead of giving yourself a heart attack on NL, you should go and find yourself a husband.

easier said than done.

especially when your social life revolves around nl!

Sweetie it is women I blame for their plight. We believe we must marry and are willing to it all manner of bullshit just to claim married woman. See I'm married and I don't do half of the things u listed. I have a cleaner that cleans the house for me, I have a washer, my husband and I share work. YES we do. When he said to me what his foolish friends said to him " when I woman gets married she forgets her husband and only cares for kids" , I told him straight up, am I a machine? So after all this work while u sit and watch tv you still expect me to have time for you? If you want me to to care of u then help me to care of them and then I won't be too tired. After he saw that was it ol boy buckled up. Now he gets them ready for school while I make lunch. He cleans up when I'm too tired. The only thing he doesn't do is cook cos Walahi he will burn my house down. I'm so not stressed and I thank God for that

In essence women don't sell ur selves short. I'm not scared to be alone. My motto is I'd rather be alone than unhappy.

[CHocolaTE:
]SERIOUSLY? WHY?

Why on earth do you people think that women will keel over and die if they don't get married?
Why do you think women are just dying to get married or get you hooked?

Day after day on Nairaland I see posts by men that talk about how some female celebrity is approaching her 30's and is not married or how some other ladies will never get married because of one reason or another as if these women told you that their lives cannot continue without marriage.

Why on earth do you people think Nigerian women are desperate to get married to you?
See eh, the reason why majority of women seek marriage is because of societal pressure from people that cannot mind their business and because they want to have kids that will not be called bastards so you better understand that fact.

Marriage hardly benefits women (except the very few lucky ones that married considerate men) so why do you think they are dying for it?
Husbands come home from work and expect a hot/good meal which the wife is supposed to have prepared; it is hardly ever the other way round and it is very rare for a woman to come home and meet that her husband has prepared something for her to eat yet this is something men enjoy all the time.
Men just stay by the side and watch while their wives whine in pregnancy pains and face the pains of being pregnant for months; imagine the struggles of getting the kids ready for school while fighting early morning sickness.

She works to assist you and must still submit to your whims because society expects her to, and you still expect sexxual gratification when you come home not considering that she is probably exhausted.
Also, after marriage the husband clearly enjoys his life and freedom more than the woman. he can close from work and 'hang out with the boys' instead of going home and nobody queries him, but his wife can never try such, she goes home straight to take care of children, does the cooking and cleaning and what not. She even has to take a break from work sometimes to pick the kids from school and drop them at home then go back to work before finally returning home at the end of the day to carry house work solely on her head because the majority of Nigerian men are lazy asses that think that helping their wives at home is an abomination.

After all the stress of doing housework on her own and taking care of children on her own she starts to look old and tired and her husband complains that she is now too old and unattractive and without thinking twice, he begins to look outside at younger women because his wife is no longer attractive to him.
The worst part is that the children the women is taking care of, the children that she got so stressed for and losses her beauty after birthing are bearing the man's name. The children bear his name and not hers and yet the men will have the effrontery to say that their wife is no longer attractive after bearing these kids so they want to chase other women.

What do women even gain from marriages for heavens sake?
People expects them give up your identity and start bearing their husbands' name, the kids you spend your life taking care of bear his name and claim his home town when they are asked where they come from, the man is very very likely to cheat on his wife and maybe infect her with some STD or another and he will more likely than not, turn her into his slave by refusing to assist with house work while expecting her to contribute financially to the upkeep of the house.
In fact, if not that religions make childbearing outside marriage a sin and society(mostly men) treat unmarried girls like outcasts, I'm sure many women will not get married, who in their right senses will want to marry an overbearing, unhelpful, slave driving no-good lazy ass; which majority of men are, when they can just have their kids in peace and not have to worry about taking care of him?

All of you can relax, eh kwa?
Women are not in any hurry to become your slaves.
Enough of the marriage this and marriage talk you keep disturbing our ears with.


Lastly, I know that not all married men think that women are on earth to be their slaves, I know that some kind and thoughtful men still exist there so this message does not apply to them.
Kudos to the 2% of Nigerian men that still have respect for women and consider their feelings after marriage.
I salute you.

GBAM!!! Wel said 1million likes. Do not mind all these little boys.These men are forever obsessed with what woman are doing and marriage. If a woman chooses her career first then they will complain that you not getting younger who will marry u etc etc as if you will die if you do not get married, like they are doing you a favour. I completely understand where you are coming from and i suggest if u do not get a nice guy falling under the 2% you should get an oyinbo,they have no problems with doing their part, equaality etc. Best of luck to you.

[CHocolaTE:
]SERIOUSLY? WHY?

Why on earth do you people think that women will keel over and die if they don't get married?
Why do you think women are just dying to get married or get you hooked?

Day after day on Nairaland I see posts by men that talk about how some female celebrity is approaching her 30's and is not married or how some other ladies will never get married because of one reason or another as if these women told you that their lives cannot continue without marriage.

Why on earth do you people think Nigerian women are desperate to get married to you?
See eh, the reason why majority of women seek marriage is because of societal pressure from people that cannot mind their business and because they want to have kids that will not be called bastards so you better understand that fact.

Marriage hardly benefits women (except the very few lucky ones that married considerate men) so why do you think they are dying for it?
Husbands come home from work and expect a hot/good meal which the wife is supposed to have prepared; it is hardly ever the other way round and it is very rare for a woman to come home and meet that her husband has prepared something for her to eat yet this is something men enjoy all the time.
Men just stay by the side and watch while their wives whine in pregnancy pains and face the pains of being pregnant for months; imagine the struggles of getting the kids ready for school while fighting early morning sickness.

She works to assist you and must still submit to your whims because society expects her to, and you still expect sexxual gratification when you come home not considering that she is probably exhausted.
Also, after marriage the husband clearly enjoys his life and freedom more than the woman. he can close from work and 'hang out with the boys' instead of going home and nobody queries him, but his wife can never try such, she goes home straight to take care of children, does the cooking and cleaning and what not. She even has to take a break from work sometimes to pick the kids from school and drop them at home then go back to work before finally returning home at the end of the day to carry house work solely on her head because the majority of Nigerian men are lazy asses that think that helping their wives at home is an abomination.

After all the stress of doing housework on her own and taking care of children on her own she starts to look old and tired and her husband complains that she is now too old and unattractive and without thinking twice, he begins to look outside at younger women because his wife is no longer attractive to him.
The worst part is that the children the women is taking care of, the children that she got so stressed for and losses her beauty after birthing are bearing the man's name. The children bear his name and not hers and yet the men will have the effrontery to say that their wife is no longer attractive after bearing these kids so they want to chase other women.

What do women even gain from marriages for heavens sake?
People expects them give up your identity and start bearing their husbands' name, the kids you spend your life taking care of bear his name and claim his home town when they are asked where they come from, the man is very very likely to cheat on his wife and maybe infect her with some STD or another and he will more likely than not, turn her into his slave by refusing to assist with house work while expecting her to contribute financially to the upkeep of the house.
In fact, if not that religions make childbearing outside marriage a sin and society(mostly men) treat unmarried girls like outcasts, I'm sure many women will not get married, who in their right senses will want to marry an overbearing, unhelpful, slave driving no-good lazy ass; which majority of men are, when they can just have their kids in peace and not have to worry about taking care of him?

All of you can relax, eh kwa?
Women are not in any hurry to become your slaves.
Enough of the marriage this and marriage talk you keep disturbing our ears with.


Lastly, I know that not all married men think that women are on earth to be their slaves, I know that some kind and thoughtful men still exist there so this message does not apply to them.
Kudos to the 2% of Nigerian men that still have respect for women and consider their feelings after marriage.
I salute you.

THIS IS THE HORSESHIT GOSPEL FRUSTRATED FCKED UP SINGLE WOMEN TELL EACH OTHER 2 CONSOLE THEMSELVES.

Subomi-luv:
GBAM!!! Wel said 1million likes. Do not mind all these little boys.These men are forever obsessed with what woman are doing and marriage. If a woman chooses her career first then they will complain that you not getting younger who will marry u etc etc as if you will die if you do not get married, like they are doing you a favour. I completely understand where you are coming from and i suggest if u do not get a nice guy falling under the 2% you should get an oyinbo,they have no problems with doing their part, equaality etc. Best of luck to you.

Hag, go and find husband to marry.

tpia@:
As per topic

Which men is the op referring to?

The same ones who say they're not interested in marrying any female at all, or are there some other men around here that i'm not aware of.

The type of men described by the op, are not interested in marrying to begin with.

If the men say they dont want to marry, and the women insist they themselves are not interested in marrying, then why exactly is there a quandary here, talkless all these arguments and pages of threads.

atooo

Gamesmart:

If marriage is that bad and valueless to women then why do women in all parts of the world including the West

- want it
- are desperate to go into it
- pressure men for it
- make it a destination goal after crossing an age
- enter it
- stay in it
- fight for it to continue going
- are miserable and bitter if it ends
- and are keen on get in another one after it ends

Come off it, sugar. Women are addicted to, are hungry for, work hard to and are desperate to marry, even the ones in western countries where marriage is increasingly out of fashion and there is no pressure. Except you are saying women are purely dumb, they sure do gain alot from marriage for them to make it centre of and priority of their lives.

hmmm,...

born7win: @OP

Don't confuse NL and society. My mother, aunties, and grandmothers have been pressuring my sisters to get married forever. The men in my family don't give a s h i t. I would say that most of the pressures come from women. These men on NL say it as a form of insult. They themselves wouldn't marry these ladies; they haven't even married their girlfriends.

My dear, taking the words that the pranksters on the romance section say to heart tells me that you are a learner. Instead of giving yourself a heart attack on NL, you should go and find yourself a husband.

haba,...

Daresh: Sweetie it is women I blame for their plight. We believe we must marry and are willing to it all manner of bullshit just to claim married woman. See I'm married and I don't do half of the things u listed. I have a cleaner that cleans the house for me, I have a washer, my husband and I share work. YES we do. When he said to me what his foolish friends said to him " when I woman gets married she forgets her husband and only cares for kids" , I told him straight up, am I a machine? So after all this work while u sit and watch tv you still expect me to have time for you? If you want me to to care of u then help me to care of them and then I won't be too tired. After he saw that was it ol boy buckled up. Now he gets them ready for school while I make lunch. He cleans up when I'm too tired. The only thing he doesn't do is cook cos Walahi he will burn my house down. I'm so not stressed and I thank God for that

In essence women don't sell ur selves short. I'm not scared to be alone. My motto is I'd rather be alone than unhappy.

very mature post

@subomi.. welcome

honeric01:

And why do you want to give birth? What exactly do you want them to learn from you? Just remain single and pls don't add more problem to the society.

Every human being (animal) has a right to reproduce! There is what they called single dads and single mums!

[CHocolaTE:
]

Good to hear that you are still happy and getting by despite being single.
Keep your head up and remain proud.
I wish you the best

singlehood with shaggging to cap it...hypocrite!

coogar:

every woman in nigeria wants to marry - it's a status symbol and the society generally sees it as a big achievement for the woman getting married.



it has everything to do with it.
in nigeria, your opinion as a single woman would not hold any value if you are giving advice to any marital issue. the people on the other side of the argument would ask if you are married - if you say no then you would be laughed at!



and i am telling you this pressure is created by them. women always want what their mates have. your friends would want your kind of weave, bag, accessories, phones, etc - same applies to relationship. once any of your friends gets married, then the pressure to marry starts. do you not see how single women fight to catch the bouquet thrown by the bride like it's a ticket to heaven?

Her grouse is men should start doing house chores to reflect on their women that they equally want the marriage as women do and that makes women not to look like slaves.

If u bring chores, he will bring his own problem for the sharing. Even as women are changing everything now...no Mrs, it is Dr, no spokeswoman...it is now spokesperson, no actress..it is now actor,no policewoman but police officer etc women still can't handle the role and responsibilities.When a thief knocks, they want the men to head off the danger or even die.

You talk about chores sharing, men talk about the house building expenses. It is a division of labor that every set is seeing the need to pitch in as we move on. Anything outside that, is divorce, murder and single parenthood or singlehood.

Buy a woman a car and she buys you a boxer...in her mind it is equal.

poster,
read Genesis 3:16 u hear.E talk say woman go suffer labor pain when she they born + say her desire go be on her husband & say d husband go rule over her!
Na me write am?

CHocolaTE,"Why on earth do you people think Nigerian women are desperate to get married to you?
See eh, the reason why majority of women seek marriage is because of societal pressure from people that cannot mind their business and because they want to have kids that will not be called bastards so you better understand that fact."

This line appear to be written by an embittered and misguided female. Your reasons adduced for marriage is in the first place very disheartening. The real question you should be asking yourself is "why on earth must I be married?"
The last I remember, no one has been charge for refusing to get married nor has has anyone been compelled to produce a husband before been delivered of her baby.
You want to eat your cake and have it back. Girl, that is almost impossible.
Marriage is of mutual consent and functions best when there is mutual sacrifice.
When you critically look at marriage, you will see the many sacrifices everyone has to make. It is a risk taken in the belief of a better tomorrow. It is a leap into uncharted territory irrespective of how many times you've been married or how many relationships you've had or how much "experience" you may also have acquired.

My advice for you girl is to order your priorities, then go ahead and live your life. You one have one life. Please minimize the mistake you make in it. Time could be an enemy.
[quote author=Ovaiegbe]CHocolaTE,"Why on earth do you people think Nigerian women are desperate to get married to you?
See eh, the reason why majority of women seek marriage is because of societal pressure from people that cannot mind their business and because they want to have kids that will not be called bastards so you better understand that fact."

This line appear to be written by an embittered and misguided female. Your reasons adduced for marriage is in the first place very disheartening. The real question you should be asking yourself is "why on earth must I be married?"
The last I remember, no one has been charge for refusing to get married nor has has anyone been compelled to produce a husband before been delivered of her baby.
You want to eat your cake and have it back. Girl, that is almost impossible.
Marriage is of mutual consent and functions best when there is mutual sacrifice.
When you critically look at marriage, you will see the many sacrifices everyone has to make. It is a risk taken in the belief of a better tomorrow. It is a leap into uncharted territory irrespective of how many times you've been married or how many relationships you've had or how much "experience" you may also have acquired.

My advice for you girl is to order your priorities, then go ahead and live your life. You one have one life. Please minimize the mistake you make in it. Time could be an

what OP said is true but it is a bad mentality for a woman to have except u are really convinced u dont want to marry.

i have met someone with this kind of mentality but 7 yrs later she now wants to get married and has suddenly become desperate. she is 36.


my point is that if u are a feminist and not interested in marriage, please be consistent. cos usually, it becomes more difficult for women to marry with increasing age. Men who initially werent interested in marriage can change their mind all of a sudden and still be able to settle down despite age.

devour129: my dear everyday I come hear and all I hear is men men men ! So who sleeps with all these single girls ? Ghost ? But still men are these and that. Please go get married and train your boys to be a good husbands to there wives. Am tired jor and before I forget Jide,I don't drink cos I have a very light head maybe we can share a pack of fruit juice one day

No problem my sis.Its a promise and God willing,its a date i shall live to fulfill.Meanwhile keep spinning 'em on Nairaland. Following and applauding your feats and vybzzz online,closely.

Sometimes i just pity the mentality of some female folks... If u know u are not a marriage material, why not stay in ur father's house and try to be the boss u want to be... Women do not allow laziness break ur home, & quit listening 2 gossip.

biolabee:

Pass me not o gentle savior; hear my humble cry
While on others thou art calling;DO NOT PASS ME BY

oh lawd! LWKMD

ekwah: You are such a... I wish I have time to really reply this very silly post....

The importance of the institution of marriage can't be overemphasized. I completely support the promotion of women's rights in a masculist society like Nigeria's, but this very horrid picture of a master-slave relationship that you've painted makes absolutely no sense. Marriage isn't supposed to be a smooth-sail journey in the first place. it is completely the responsibility of the parties involved to set whatever rules that work for themselves. We all claim that we need freedom but seek companionship/love over everything else at the end of the day. Men too have their own pressures so think well and not type such BS next time you want to attack marriage as an institution.

All these girls wey no dey analyze things critically before they jump to conclusions sef... allowing your self to be brainwashed by what you see in western media would be very disastrous. Our society functions differently from theirs...
don't type this nonsense next time please.


so pissed

Precisely,just ponder on Ops points and see her resentment for men.Classic Feminist .
1."Marriage hardly benefits women"
2."Kudos to the 2% of Nigerian MEN that still have respect for women and consider their feelings after marriage, "-Appalled where that came from.
3."Also, after marriage the husband clearly enjoys his life and freedom MORE than the woman"
4."The majority of Nigerian MEN are lazy ASSESS that think that helping their wives at home is an abomination. "
5."The worst part is that the children the women is taking care of, the children that she got so stressed for and losses her beauty after birthing are bearing the MAN's name. The children bear his name and not hers"
6."the MAN is very very likely to cheat on his wife and maybe infect her with some STD or another and he will more likely than not, turn her into his slave"
7."I'm sure many women will not get married, who in their right senses will want to marry an overbearing, unhelpful, slave driving no-good lazy Bottom; which majority of MEN are"

TRUE SIS.

[CHocolaTE:
]

Women can have children without marriage, they only get married to do so because their bible or quran tells them to. Put religion aside and no women will marry your lazy over bearing asses.

THEY WILL TURN TO LESBIAN AND BORED FOR LIFE MAYBE DIE OF HEART ATTACK AND HEART BREAK..... THEY NEED MEN... YOU KNOW WOMEN OF 30 SOMETHING ARE GULLIBLE AND PUSSY RUSTY I MUST SAY

WOW... this is one of teh most beautiful articles I have ever read. And so well-written at that (compared to some of teh stuff that we are subjected to on this forum)...

And I think people are confusing issues... this is not about the pressure women put on each other. This article is simply telling an average man that we are no as eager to become his wife as he believes. So its time you really got over yourselves.

What women do to each each other should not even be discussed here.

The fact is that women do not gain anything from marriage... IT DOES NOT BENEFIT US AT ALL. More and more women are starting to realise that and it scared the crap out of the male-species.

[CHocolaTE:
]

Women can have children without marriage, they only get married to do so because their bible or quran tells them to. Put religion aside and no women will marry your lazy over bearing asses.

there are things we cant explain but lets do our bit and leave the rest. http://mytcube./2013/04/22/reading-the-other-persons-manual/

SAGirl: WOW... this is one of teh most beautiful articles I have ever read. And so well-written at that (compared to some of teh stuff that we are subjected to on this forum)...

And I think people are confusing issues... this is not about the pressure women put on each other. This article is simply telling an average man that we are no as eager to become his wife as he believes. So its time you really got over yourselves.

What women do to each each other should not even be discussed here.

The fact is that women do not gain anything from marriage... IT DOES NOT BENEFIT US AT ALL. More and more women are starting to realise that and it scared the crap out of the male-species.

Welcome....
This cause needs more adherents

.

devour129: you really are either crazy ,demented.you need help and please get it soon. People like you should not be let out of a madhouse. You talk against marriage but you are in a relationship ? Am married just like every woman of marriageable age in my family and to the glory of God am doing fine cos av got a good mother whom did her best to raise me to be a virtous woman. No need to tell you how my hubby looks,how mi kids look and there character ,how I run mi business empire which my HUSBAND helped me grow,the people around me I av supported etc. cos if I do that,you will kill your self

Do I have your time...? Keep on ranting like a demented fowl ....hahahahah a lol..... Oh Lord have mercy! Can't stop laughing at your idiotic statements... Empire ko , Vampire ni.....abeggi, go siddon... Matured sensible people are talking, u r there ranting ... I pity you..... ...useless wife/ mother.... Thats if u r truly one, as u claimed.

SAGirl:

The fact is that women do not gain anything from marriage... IT DOES NOT BENEFIT US AT ALL. More and more women are starting to realise that and it scared the crap out of the male-species.

Ha ha ha.

You must be a comedian because your last paragraph is full of jokes.

The speed at which a newly engaged lady takes to upload her new ring on Instagram, Facebook , bebo, twitter and Linda ikeji's blog is faster than lightning.

Show me a man that is that enthused about getting engaged?

it is a bad mentality for a woman to have except u are really convinced u dont want to marry.


i have met someone with this kind of mentality but 7 yrs later she now wants to get married and has suddenly become desperate. she is 36.

all too common.

the other day someone was saying its better to remain single than enter in a relationship with the kind of fellow who will drug his g/f, loosen her brazilian weave and sell it for half price.

imo, the solution is not necessarily remaining single [unless you have a strong conviction to do so, possibly a religious one], but if you find yourself attracting deadbeats only, then reevaluate the kind of criteria you require in a man.

and yes, reevaluate yourself also.