Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / NewStats: 3,195,037 members, 7,956,852 topics. Date: Monday, 23 September 2024 at 08:40 PM |
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) (670464 Views)
10 Myths About Introverts / Strictly Extroverts Whatsapp Group / 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts (2) (3) (4)
(1) (2) (3) ... (202) (203) (204) (205) (206) (207) (208) ... (301) (Reply) (Go Down)
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Nobody: 11:36pm On Nov 02, 2019 |
Ftheophilous:nairalanders are not sensitive to anything. |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Nobody: 11:38pm On Nov 02, 2019 |
Rubbiish:you can see here that someone is saying my situation is making him laugh. Introversion is so useless |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Martinsville(m): 8:36am On Nov 03, 2019 |
Good morning everyone. I'm an introvert and i'm glad i found this place. Now a sneak peek into my introversion. I'm sorry but i do not have the amazing writing prowess most introverts possess so please bear with me I don't know how to make friends and i think the last time i ever had a friend was in secondary school .Now this is usually not an issue most times but sometime it just hits me so hard i'm almost depressed now this is coming from someone who always wishes for a meteor to land on earth again and wipe out everyone so i can finally stay in a quiet world for once but since i'm not selfish i also eventually die after about an hour so sometimes its weird for me switching from these two emotions I get bored easily and i'm generally lazy about everything that does not interest me(Reason why i stopped going to classes after first year and i guess dropped out of school since i eventually missed all my exams in second year .But i guess i was smart enough to apply for another course i was interested in so i'm not exactly a drop out . In both courses no one knows my name i've always just been referred to as "Guy" i guess i don't stand out at all. Relationship wise, i have never been in a relationship, don't know how to talk to girls and people think i'm proud(i honestly don't have anything to be proud of yet ) I really do want to be more social , be able to talk in crowds and just let people know that i have a really fun side but at the end of the day i still can't do it. 8 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Kurtis02(m): 10:45am On Nov 03, 2019 |
Don't understand why people always think introverts are proud. There is this coursemate of mine, he is an introvert and due to his behavior a lot of people think he is a proud guy which I know he is not. He told me about his situation and need advice on how to relate with people, don't know what to tell him. His nature is really disturbing. So house how do I advice the guy. |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Ftheophilous(m): 3:15pm On Nov 03, 2019 |
Replying to the two posts above. Trying to make people like you is a waste of precious time and really stressful, because at the end of the day you wouldn't know who you are anymore and certainly would not be comfortable with who you are trying to be for them. Instead, do the things you do best that will make people want to know your person. Building up a relationship, especially in an academic environment is very easy especially if you are the rather brilliant type as people will want to be closer to you(particularly girls). Otherwise, form a relationship with someone that you can easily relate with as there is usually that person in a social group who is quite sensitive and amiable. We had a direct entry student in my sophomore year in the Uni who was kind of shy with strangers and felt somewhat out of place. I helped in his transition to becoming a full fledged member of our group, and he later became the most radical and paroxysmal person in my class and people liked him. Having someone else ease the tension can be very helpful. Truthfully, there are levels of introversion. Some people are so in their shell that even you as an introvert will notice. But in the midst of friendly faces you would be very very surprised at their crazy nature. For introverts, because we are more substantive, it takes time to become closer to people. The best thing to do is to recognise a catalyst that hastens this process rather than trying hard to please people. The more you meet people, the easier it becomes in understanding how to behave in a social setting. Sitting enclosed in your shell will do nothing but create more space where you fall deeper in to your loneliness. Evey write up I make here reflects my experience hitherto. Although I can call myself an introvert, I'm definitely not a shy person. Some people are really very shy but that should not be mistaken for introversion. Introverts are people who tend to keep their thoughts to themselves while a shy person is naturally timid, fearful, apprehensive, fidgety and easily embarrassed; but this is not always inherently associated with introversion. That your friend may just need a person to bridge the gap between he and your course mates. Best way to go about this is to introduce him in every discussion while pointing out his good qualities. i.e. he might be a talkative, a funny or smart person or any other thing interesting about his personality, and this will create a platform where he and your course mates can easily interact. 5 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Rubbiish(m): 6:17pm On Nov 03, 2019 |
JacksonMS:I am an introvert too |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Rubbiish(m): 6:26pm On Nov 03, 2019 |
Kurtis02:The only way out for your guy is to force himself to join a church group with few persons preferably. He will begin to take up small roles like leading prayers, contributing during meetings. From this small group he will move to a larger group, after which he can now begin to relate freely well with people. He should also try to talk to opposite sex, this is very important, he should force himself to discuss issues with opposite sex to break out of that shell. I know he doesn't have a girlfriend. Because he can't talk to girls if he is unable to relate with people. It is important for him to do all the above now that he is still young. He can't break out from his shell alone, he needs to join a group & relate with opposite sex. When he becomes comfortable doing these, then is problem his half solved. Cc Martinsville The above same advice goes for u |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Rubbiish(m): 6:35pm On Nov 03, 2019 |
Ftheophilous:The above write up sums it all As an introvert, u MUST force yourself to go out, just to have that knowledge of living in a social environment. |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Nobody: 8:31pm On Nov 03, 2019 |
Rubbiish:I know but why are you saying I sound funny? |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Nobody: 8:32pm On Nov 03, 2019 |
Rubbiish:I have tried forcing myself before but it led to public disgrace |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Ftheophilous(m): 8:57pm On Nov 03, 2019 |
JacksonMS:The idea is not to force it but ease into it. Go at your own pace by starting with small baby steps before you start the long trek. Get involved not because of the pressure of doing so but because you want to really experience something new. Sincerely there is no scripted manner of behaving in public. You just have to understand your audience and go with the pace albeit slowly. 2 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Xzbit91: 1:48am On Nov 04, 2019 |
Martinsville: It's funny how y'all start with "sorry, I don't know how to write" then go ahead to write like a seasoned professional. Anyway, let's get to the crux of the matter. The way most of us introverts look at social interaction is all shades of wrong. I'm saying this because of your meteor striking the earth leaving you a sole survivor fantasies. I also noticed earlier on the thread someone wished he could tell the world to shut up for a minute. While wanting a little quiet in your life is not a big deal, it's something all introverts strive for, but having radical thoughts like the ones above is so problematic it borders on nihilism. Instead of thinking the world is making noise or engaging in pointless talk, think of such interactions as a social transaction where there is a give and take relationship and everyone partaking comes off richer with each contact. It's through these dialogues that trust is built, relationships are formed and ideas brought to life. So if you want to succeed in this life and make your existence less miserable, you have no option than to play the game. At core of every human is desire to be loved and respected. This cannot be achieved without social interaction and as introverts, we don't know how to reconcile that. I guess that's why some of you here battle depression. That, however, isn't the end of the world. You can train yourself to blend in social situations and make friends and even find love. It all begins with voluntary exposure to social situations you previously find discomforting. For example, start with familiar group class and church activities then proceed to recreational activities you're passionate about like sports etc Once you have familiarised yourself with the environment, proceed to strike conversation with one or two people. This should be easy as you share a common interest and the conversation can be superficial, nothing deep. How to have conversation that isn't boring 1. Don't ask close ended questions ie questions with a yes or no answer. 2. Stop thinking about what you'll say next and instead pay close attention to what they're saying. 3. If you were attentive to what they said, you'll be properly armed with what to respond. What they say can be used to continue the topic or branch into other topics. 4. Show genuine care about what they say and try to remember it so next time it's easy to talk to them. Gradual and voluntary exposure to those things you fear most is the cure to your social anxiety. Often you'll find out they're not what you thought them to be and you'll be braver when faced with same situations in the future. NB I absolutely love the fact you were able to to take charge of your life by abandoning the course you didn't have passion for. I also find myself feeling lazy about stuff I don't care about. That's normal 4 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Nobody: 2:19am On Nov 04, 2019 |
Xzbit91:great! 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Xzbit91: 9:20am On Nov 04, 2019 |
Jobia: I'm happy you could find value in my post |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Vibesking(m): 9:11am On Nov 07, 2019 |
I have an amazing girlfriend. We've been dating for two months now. But right now, there's nothing I want more in life than being single again. 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Drizzle007(m): 9:28am On Nov 07, 2019 |
Having a serious problem getting a Job because of my nature. Most people I know, which is quite a few got theirs through networking and referrals. I have no one. I've only been contact three times for interviews all in distant locations and I don't even bother going because of that. Introversion is worse when you're done with school, NYSC and anything that forces you to be in crowded places. When you are alone being a job seeker or even trying venturing in a business. It just get you at the neck. Never thought the ripple effect of being an introvert would come hard on me like this. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Drizzle007(m): 9:33am On Nov 07, 2019 |
Vibesking: I can relate to this. I stay away from relationships for two reasons. I don't have the finance to back it up currently. It takes away my solitude due to women being too demanding for attention and all that. I sometimes like to go days without reaching out to anyone. When you're in a relationship, try that and it's war. Man!! 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Vibesking(m): 10:10am On Nov 07, 2019 |
Drizzle007: Honestly, it's work! To all the singles out there... Enjoy your peace. You're not missing out on anything. 4 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by scave(m): 1:01pm On Nov 07, 2019 |
Drizzle007: Including me, sometimes I get tongue tied in interview and I ain't doll. 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Vibesking(m): 4:00pm On Nov 07, 2019 |
Drizzle007: I'm sorry about what you going through. I'm a core introvert but it has never gotten In the way of my communication or proved an hindrance when situations arises that requires me to speak up. I'm quite fluent and speaking in public, or answering questions have never been an issue. A good prayer culture helps too . If you can talk to God, you can talk to anyone. Good luck. 3 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Rubbiish(m): 5:11pm On Nov 07, 2019 |
Vibesking:Just two months? Lol |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Rubbiish(m): 5:15pm On Nov 07, 2019 |
Drizzle007:Please stop blaming your nature I understand most introverts aren't perfect in certain jobs, but they are good at sedentary jobs. Truth is there are presently no jobs in d country, if u happen to know one big man at d top, u will land a job today, regardless of your nature. Many extroverts are jobless, having alot of friends doesn't mean they will help u. 4 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Nobody: 8:50pm On Nov 07, 2019 |
Vibesking:Does she talk too much? |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Vibesking(m): 4:59pm On Nov 08, 2019 |
I feel so many emotions at the same time but I can't even describe it. It's like colour. You can't describe the colour blue. But when you see it, you recognise it. My mind is complex; always ranging. Thought I've finally found peace but just like that, it's gone. I'm beginning to hate existence all over again. 2 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Vibesking(m): 5:00pm On Nov 08, 2019 |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Nobody: 7:52pm On Nov 08, 2019 |
Drizzle007:Woww u kinda summed up current position.. Everyone kinda think I am being an ass by not grabbing any job yet especially teaching..lmao But las las we be alright .. We always do |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Drizzle007(m): 9:57pm On Nov 08, 2019 |
Mrpsly247: Amen brother Amen. 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Treasure17(m): 10:51pm On Nov 08, 2019 |
Everyone's contributions on this thread are so apt. What about someone who is shy and introverted as well. @Ftheofilous |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by omobeey(f): 9:20am On Nov 09, 2019 |
swtme:I never thought havimg sleep paralysis has anything to do with anxiety disorder, I do have in once it a while.. I met a psycoloshist some months ago and she told me I am suffering from anxiety disorder and depression cuz I was actually going through stuffs right from childhood days.. I stopped seeing the phycologist though.. wish there is a way I can overcome this. I have low self esteem, am always indoor, hardly make friends..... |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Geofavor(m): 9:19pm On Nov 09, 2019 |
Vibesking:Are you a rapper or a poet? |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Geofavor(m): 11:39pm On Nov 09, 2019 |
Introversion simply means keeping to oneself. Any thing other than that isn't Introversion. It is a specific behavior -- one of the numerous behaviors exhibited by humans. You're mistaking when you assert that certain behaviors and likes of yours are due to Introversion. That you love black doesn't mean it's an "introvert thing". It's just a personal preference which anyone could have, introvert or extrovert. If you're shy, it's not because of Introversion. You might be an extreme extrovert and still be shy. shyness is a behavior on its own. it is not peculiar to introverts. And so is any other behavior: Laziness, kindness, wickedness, greed, pride, etc. You're an introvert simply means you're keeping to yourself. Any other thing you're doing, or any thing you like, isn't as a result of Introversion. If you were an extrovert, same would still be the case. My point? Don't generalize and associate any behavior and like with Introversion only. Being smart is not a function of Introversion. Neither is being sensitive. Neither is being boring. etc. These are things anyone could be. Some people might not even be natural introverts. Most times, we may have problems. These problems may make some of us seek Introversion consciously or subconsciously. Where most people get it wrong is that, they leave the underlying problems and start blaming Introversion. You should focus on solving the problems. After solving those problems, if you aren't naturally disposed to Introversion, you will see your extroversion come to life. But if you're naturally disposed to Introversion, you will begin to enjoy the Introversion. Greetings to the house 2 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Vibesking(m): 2:26am On Nov 10, 2019 |
(1) (2) (3) ... (202) (203) (204) (205) (206) (207) (208) ... (301) (Reply)
The Family Section Fun Room!! / House Clearance Sales.. Come In Here!!!!
(Go Up)
Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 102 |