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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… (41641 Views)
Do You Know Why You're Still Single? (Photo) / Why Do Ugly Guys Get A Girl And Handsome Ones Are Single / Beautiful But Still Single... (2) (3) (4)
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Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by MizMyColi(f): 12:08pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
quintybabee: It is funny when guys say ladies are choosy and you conclude they aint married bcause of character flaws. 100000000+ likes |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by MizMyColi(f): 12:11pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
1000+ likes shady26: Answer: wait for your man and while at it , be responsible and productive.Life does not begin and end with marriage! |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by Nobody: 12:13pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
shaybebaby: Marriage this, marriage that... So all ladies must get married yeah? Okay, after that " big achievement", what next?Yes my sister, marriage has ended: 1. Poverty 2. Suffering 3. Sleeping around 4. Confusion 5. Unhappiness 6. Loneliness 7. Disrespect Etc for many ladies...I am sure u can count some married women around u or ur area who came from wretched family backgrounds but became queens after they got married to their husbands. Marriage can make or mar someone, that's y we all need to pray sincerely to our God to pls help us find our real mate. If u marry your real mate; whether poor or rich, u two will achieve greatness with time, but if u marry the wrong person, your life trauma begins. Let's stop pretending like we all don't long to be with that awesome guy or lady that we do secretly admire or pray for....instead, let's be honest and humble and ask God to pls link us with our real partner, and that is my daily prayer, so help me God Marriage has made some people great, what if my parents decided not to marry, where will I have been What if President Goodluck's parents decided not to marry and pretend they don't want marriage, where will Goodluck have been today Pls let's not follow the footsteps of failed people who failed out of their pomposity, ignorance and arrogance, but let's try and follow honourable men and women who achieved great things in life. Marriage can make you become the best and the most important person in your society, just pray to God to help u find the right partner, that's all my sister. Have a great day ahead 1 Like |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by Beckharm: 12:16pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
Funjosh: . Marry OP |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by ihedinobi2: 12:17pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
DailyNews: OMG!!! Ihedinobi2, you're my new crush now o, no homo pls...OMG! This guy just emptied my mind here, gosh!!! My brother, I have bookmarked your name, jeez! Well done.Lol. Thanks, bro. I have followed your thoughts on this forum before and I find them admirable too. I worry about women but they've told me not to worry about them. I hope I start listening sometime. 1 Like |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by MizMyColi(f): 12:27pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
It's funny how a seemingly harmless post could generate such hateful comment. Well, one thing I've learned is, people who are so quick to criticize and use derogatory words on people, even when the aim of a discussion/gathering is solely for encouragement have an insecurity of sorts that they find hard dealing with and as such will only feel better when they vent on another and then begin to exchange banters, the cycle continues. I have read the original post countless times and seeing as I am my greatest critic, I've tried to fault even one word that I said there, bearing in mind, why I chose to write in the first place. What I mostly see here is, the topic/post being totally misconstrued or people trying to bring the heat from the other thread (wherever it is) to this one. I was even advised to tag to post, "for older ladies" It is for them and for the younger folks too, who are/will begin to receive subtle pressures from society, family and even self. My main concern now is that everyone who this really concerns get my message without getting it twisted. If any part isn't clear enough, feel free to talk to me, objectively here, it won't be as noisy, i think As for other views, as far as this thread is concerned, honestly, I couldn't care less |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by Nobody: 12:28pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
geosegun:Lol, I am married, with kids sef. I am just stating the obvious, that no one should take the hustle too serious. I am married @hotwax |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by Nobody: 12:31pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
hotwax:That's true...I blame guys on that for hyping some ladies to the detriment of those ladies' future. Anyway, a wise lady ought to know how to relate with people no matter who she is or feel she is. But then, guys too desire marriage more o you can't believe a very close friend of mine rung me over the weekend, and guess what He was just screaming that he has finally found her o to be honest with u, I felt jealous small o He told me he's gonna propose to her on his birthday coming very soon...and if I tell u how they met, u will laugh...life eh. So whoever says marriage means nothing to him/her isn't ready. If he is a guy, he has no cash, he's still below 27yrs or haven't met a girl that thrilled him, and for ladies, she is either arrogant, ill-mannered, very ugly with bad character and haven't met a guy that swept her off her feet, that's d truth If Kim K, Beyonce, Angelina Jolie, Shakira, et al would get thrilled by marriage, who is that girl claiming she doesn't like marriage Its cos she has failed in attracting d right guys due to many reasons best known to her, so if I hear I think every guy that loves his sister or female friends should introduce them to nairaland to come and learn because nairaland is one of d few places where a lady willing to learn can learn abt guys by hearing exactly how guys feel abt ladies not based on any hidden agenda. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by GRAND30(m): 12:33pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
DailyNews: One thing I have observed over the years; social media boom has deceived so many ladies into believing that they're beautiful just because they snapped arranged beautiful pictures and got likes+compliments, whereas in real life, they aren't all that pretty. Hahahahahaha...thanks for your beautiful points and the lavish commendation. I don lost my credit card oooo. Cheers brother! |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by hotwax: 12:35pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
DailyNews: That's true...I blame guys on that for hyping some ladies to the detriment of those ladies' future. Anyway, a wise lady ought to know how to relate with people no matter who she is or feel she is. The highlighted is a blow on our women. When People like Beyonce can get married, I dont see any girl not fantasizing about her wedding day. |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by Nobody: 12:42pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
hotwax:Anyway, we all know the truth- we can lie to people but we can't lie to ourselves @Ihedinobi2 and Grand50, una well done o....I am enjoying this thread....I always enjoy relationship threads |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by ChiSun27(m): 12:50pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
jennylove7575: chisun27 it OK at this point . your beginining to pass boundaries....watch it. R u threatening me? |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by ihedinobi2: 12:51pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
DailyNews: That's true...I blame guys on that for hyping some ladies to the detriment of those ladies' future. Anyway, a wise lady ought to know how to relate with people no matter who she is or feel she is.Omo, I don laff die for here. You talk true joo! Dunno what happened to the Like button though. People have said of social media that there's too much fakery here to find the right person. But people are actually more honest in anonymity than when they are known to other people. Additionally, even when people are lying unbeknownst to the people watching them, they tell you a lot about themselves through the things they consistently do. That's why people can learm a huge deal on social media. Still laffing @ the part about people who say they're not interested in marriage. Oh my God! Lmao! 1 Like |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by GRAND30(m): 12:55pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
franconian: Brother, your encounter with that girl almost knocked me down in laughter. Well I'm pleased you gave her what most people knew she needed but didn't have the guts to leave on her path. A woman's three most damaging flaws are pride, superiority complex over a man, and obsession with her physical beauty. When men come around such ladies, it is merely to take what they want and run away! Have a good day bro! I really fancy your guts. 2 Likes |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by MizMyColi(f): 12:55pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
Thank You Cococandy cococandy: The nastiest girls I ever met were the ugliest. |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by ihedinobi2: 1:08pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
MizMyColi: It's funny how a seemingly harmless post could generate such hateful comment. I think most of us say that we're our own worst critic. I certainly used to and sometimes still do. But, ehn, I have heard criticism from outside that made my own efforts to keep myself centered look like a lot of nauseating pandering, lol. I greatly admire that quality of self-judgment but we could all use outside perspective all the time, sis. Because we are not always fair to our own selves. We are either too generous or too unaccommodating sometimes to be. Secondly, your approach to this pressure that you are so interested in makes it look like the pressure is a bad thing. That was part of my concern. I don't think being pressured to succeed at most other things in life is taken so poorly. Most of us feel that we're so much better for all the pressure that our support group put on us to succeed. Where pressure does not make sense is when the person being pressured has no responsibility or control at all. Outside of that, pressure is one of the ways our support groups help to encourage us toward the best things in life. I responded here because I don't find anything in your message unclear. Pardon my impertinence. |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by shaybebaby(f): 1:10pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
osemu8: work on the scammer,but ensure u are not scammedBecause she doesn't have better things to do abi? |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by Nobody: 1:14pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
ihedinobi2:That's d truth na how can a reasonable say he or she doesn't want to marry Sir Albert Einstein married....as evil as my friend Hitler was, he still had a live-in girlfriend he was abt marrying before d world war ended against his wish...Queen Elizabeth married...Michael Jackson of all men married Believe me Ihedi, any guy that claims he doesn't want to marry is either: - broke - not of age (below 27yrs) - haven't met a lady that thrilled him beyond doubts And for d ladies, any lady u hear saying she doesn't want to marry, she is either: - very ugly with ill character that repels guys off - old and has failed to attract d right guy - have been heart-broken n dumped severally by many guys - divorced - she lacks manner, character and respect and its been chasing ppl away from her - she was raised by a single mother: a bitter and unhappy single mother who told her plenty evil things abt men And if u hear a married lady advice others not to marry, then she married for d wrong reason and regretting her mistakes and wish others can be in her shoes so she can feel glad that its everyone's problem and not hers alone Trust me, a sane man or woman from a well to do family will always long to marry 2 Likes |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by Danhumprey: 1:18pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
Sanchez01: I consider this a rebuttal to the one you read, unfortunately, I find the argument weak, a little too weak, I'd say. Your thread, though seem to serve as a bit of encouragement to females out there, still, it has failed to tackle the real issue.You've said my mind,bro. Most of these ladies forget that we are in Africa. 1 Like
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Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by ihedinobi2: 1:20pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
cococandy: So you agree that character flaws can be present in anyone?Nne, I nugo ihe a mbu: "nee ka nwata nwaanyi a na-eme ka o bu nna ya nwe ala Owere ebe o madighi mma"? You get? An ugly woman who treats herself like she's something men should die for attracts scorn because she has practically nothing going for her. But a beautiful arrogant woman is like an enticing meal full of fish spines. You want to take a swallow but you could choke on any spoon. So it's particularly more annoying when the woman who has something to be proud about becomes proud indeed. It's the same way about men. If a rich man starts to act with pride, it pisses people off. But if a poor man acts with arrogance, he might piss people off but he will attract more scorn than anger. By the way, do you watch music videos especially the raunchy ones? How many of those girls are ugly? You get my point, I hope. |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by Danhumprey: 1:24pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
hotwax:
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Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by Danhumprey: 1:25pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
ERCROSS: The bottom line is that some beautiful Ladies allows their beauties to get into their head...Very easy,I tell you! |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by MizMyColi(f): 1:48pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
ihedinobi2: I think most of us say that we're our own worst critic. I certainly used to and sometimes still do. But, ehn, I have heard criticism from outside that made my own efforts to keep myself centered look like a lot of nauseating pandering, lol. I greatly admire that quality of self-judgment but we could all use outside perspective all the time, sis. Because we are not always fair to our own selves. We are either too generous or too unaccommodating sometimes to be. But I've been criticized here. Now, subconsciously armed with that and with an open mind, I decided to make myself accountable. Most times before people tell me I'm wrong, I usually have the idea, faintly albeit. If convinced by others, due to my lack of hindsight/foresight at the time, I rarely hesitate to own up. Secondly, your approach to this pressure that you are so interested in makes it look like the pressure is a bad thing. Pressure is good. But when it comes to people being pressured in an area of their lives where they have little or no control over the outcome of such "reactions", I would that people take it really easy on them or leave them to God completely. He created them, their mate too. He knows how best to work out plans for their lives. That was part of my concern. I don't think being pressured to succeed at most other things in life is taken so poorly. Most of us feel that we're so much better for all the pressure that our support group put on us to succeed. Where pressure does not make sense is when the person being pressured has no responsibility or control at all. Outside of that, pressure is one of the ways our support groups help to encourage us toward the best things in life. Having shared a real life experience here on the "goodness of marriage pressure" (even when we have no real control as to whom we marry or who marries us eventually), I have nothing more to say. I responded here because I don't find anything in your message unclear. Pardon my impertinence. I never perceived it that way. |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by Olusanya333(m): 2:47pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
Like Seriously,ladies have many problem,wanting all attention |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by princessayesha(f): 2:57pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
Matured post at last |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by WoodcrestMayor(m): 3:11pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
Ugly or beautiful,many ladies in our generation will remain single.Have u bothered checking how "fashionable" it is being a single mother nowadays? Many ladies forget that we are in africa and we still respect the rules of marriage.I was on the thread abt ankle chains fews days back and a lady talked abt not begging for a man; she implied her freedom is more important.Another said men are looking pple who they'll dictate to.They fail to realise that this generation is different from that of our parents.Few men 'll adopt the approach of our fathers' which was /is very authoritative.This implies women already av more freedom...wonder wat they still looking for.They shld keep in mind that there will neva come a time(regardless of level of civilzation) where women 'll head families.Roles are prescribed and nothing will change them.Even in the animal kingdom,there are rules. I was watching birds(an hobby for me) some months back and i saw these two birds;one was picking dry grass for nests while d oda was on sentry.Which one was male?Your guess is as good as mine My advice is dat dey relax and take their minds off that" utopian" relationship they seek where man and woman have equal rights |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by hotwax: 3:14pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
In addition, our girls nowadays base their life on Nollliwood stars and music industries. It is what a nollywood star does that they imitate. I know of some girls in my office talk about Kim Kardasian every day. She is always with Magzine of Kardashians. She even said it publicly one day that she doesnt mind doing bottom Job. When a female artist goes out public on twitter to say rubbish about how they are better as single mom. They dont know that most of these Nollywood stars are Abuja big girls (prostitutes). They are just advertising and assuring their customers that they are still single. Most girls will want to copy that. One will even say, "after all, Genevieve is still single" Are you Genevieve? Do you know what Genevieve does to make money? Do you think its this usual, parlor drama fetching milliions they are spending? Hell no, some of them are lucky to get MTN/GLO endorsements. Most of them are call girls to big belle men. When I get female daughter, I wont expose her to TV life 1 Like |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by hotwax: 3:26pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
WoodcrestMayor: Ugly or beautiful,many ladies in our generation will remain single.Have u bothered checking how "fashionable" it is being a single mother nowadays? Its not African matter. Even the Oyinbos, the so called civilized people Cherise Union of Man and woman. The only reason they do arrangee wedding is because of cost of divorce. Divorce favors women in western countries. Despite that, they still find a way to get tied. Beyonce, Kim Kardasian, Maria carey, big guns in American entertainment are not single. They have good and loving home. Even little boy Justin Barbier has his own public girl. Naija girls just get their own problem 2 Likes |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by Nobody: 3:46pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
shaybebaby:u said so |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by ihedinobi2: 3:46pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
MizMyColi:Thank you. Now I'm happy. You've finally engaged me. I don't do very well with dismissive responses. I like to get feedback when I bother to get involved in a discussion. What I perceive in your response is that you consider yourself - and women, generally, I suppose - unable to control how your journey to the altar turns out. That is what I would like to discuss now with you. Why do you consider it outside your control? How do you think people get hitched, I'd like to know? Do you consider that perhaps the problem was not that you were trying so hard to get married in itself? What if it were that you didn't know why marriage was instituted and by what parameters you could identify the right man for you? And that you didn't know how to play your part as a woman to capture and hold the interest of the man you wanted? MizMyColi:I see. Thanks for telling me. Your response(s) sort of made it seem that way to me. |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by Nobody: 4:56pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
Nope. She is 'badder' than me. and she doesn't do alternate monikers. Where is she sef? Even me don turn scarce commodity for NL. Hehehe... long thing! Mizmycoli, you ehn! Okay! MizMyColi: |
Re: On Why The “Beautiful” Ones Are Still Single… by MizMyColi(f): 5:01pm On Sep 10, 2014 |
ihedinobi2: Thank you. Now I'm happy. You've finally engaged me. I don't do very well with dismissive responses. I like to get feedback when I bother to get involved in a discussion. I avoid you because you remind me alot of me. (a part) Funnily, I thought of it on my way back from work yesterday and I be like: "why do you avoid so and so people's post" Then I start to give reasons "They're too serious for my liking joor " "That one never laughs, must he be so serious, ha! " "The other one is fuzzy" And then my inner, inner be like: "Bae, own up joor they remind you alot about yourself" I burst into a laughter of sorts and had to form effizy with it, with my earpiece on, not really minding who was looking Why do you consider it outside your control? How do you think people get hitched, I'd like to know? Do you consider that perhaps the problem was not that you were trying so hard to get married in itself? What if it were that you didn't know why marriage was instituted and by what parameters you could identify the right man for you? And that you didn't know how to play your part as a woman to capture and hold the interest of the man you wanted? I haven't really made it a focus to think on how people get hitched. For me, it'll happen/happens when it'll. Going by my story, and like many single ladies out there, I made evident mistakes which I tried to address rather subtly in the original post. Desperation is a very repugnant scent. It does have a way of driving the guys off. Other times, the lady/guy might not necessarily be doing anything wrong, they just aren't meant to be. Honestly, I don't believe in "parameters" so to speak, they are good, yes. But I'd trust more in a knowing, more like an a posteriori knowledge, that this is Him. Feelings change, those parameters (they are in-fact, important) may disappear completely tomorrow. Holistically, my parameter would be this, having known his Good, his Bad, his Ugly and his Very Ugly. (The emboldened may not necessarily show during courtship and the early stages of marriage, it'd take intuition and hind/foresight to know that for real). Is he someone I can love still, despite all? (This is not the kind of decision you make in two weeks, even if God handed him in hand to you, it's rather gradual). What I perceive in your response is that you consider yourself - and women, generally, I suppose - unable to control how your journey to the altar turns out. That is what I would like to discuss now with you. I purposely consider it out of my control because I gave that rein of my life to someone who is beyond me, who I consider Alpha, Omega. I once prayed in these lines: "Abba, I know you've given me free will, I know I can live my life any how I want, without fear of any kind, because your sovereign hand'll be my guide." "But Abba, concerning my marriage, I would that your absolute and perfect will be done." "I give you full rein" "I give you full control" "Lead me in your paths...guide me aright" "I'm afraid of making mistakes that I may never be able to redeem myself from" "No matter what I do, no matter the choices I make, let your will for me be done." "Abba, for the life you have prepared for me, prepare me." "For the things I see not, show me." "For the things I know not, teach me." "Always give me wisdom for the moment." I see. Thanks for telling me. Your response(s) sort of made it seem that way to me. .....you're welcome. |
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