booqee:
since you have no clue as to what to do or say..you could've just jump and pass the thread..but no, your leprous hands went ahead, clicked reply to type this shi!t...? did u realise the op isn't seeking for ur solution or opinion but just trying to pass a message for people to learn from? hence the topic "lessons from my marriage". did u even read d post at all?

mehn I give up on ur case!!!!!! tufiakwa!!!

buhahhahahaaha @bolded that 'keed' me

U harsh sha

wristbangle:


I pity the life of this generation. Look at the nonsense this shallow minded nitwit is pouring hoping he/she is passing a message. The OP just save the life of million ladies going into marriage for the wrong reason. Please take your preaching to religion section. Thanks.

goldenruby:
Hmmmmm. Looks to me like there's really no rule that governs the marriage institution.
Well for me, A man's physical Beauty is absolutely irrelevant! Give me a 'gorilla-looking' man if he's got the most handsome heart and ready to lay down for his family, I'd be ready to compliment his looks

What are u waiting for? I'm here already

Ioannes:


How does posting this on Nairaland help your marriage weather the storm? instead of you to post your problems to God you are posting it here, were you told that God visits Nairaland ni?

God is omnipresent. He read am before u even read am sef. lol

nayoubiko:
PLEASE DON'T TRY AND GO OUT OF THE MARRIAGE, I BELIEVE THINGS WILL BE OK, WHAT EVER IS HAPPENING GOD KNOW TO IT, BELIEVE ME BOTH OF YOU ARE MADE FOR EACH OTHER IF NOT GOD WILL NOT BLESS YOU WITH A SECT OF TRIPLET.

MY ADVISE FOR YOU, IS TO KEEP PRAYING FOR HIM, TELL GOD TO PROVIDE A GOOD JOB OR BUSINESS THAT WILL MAKE HIM DO AS HUSBAND IN YOUR HOME.

YOUR PRAYERS IS VERY IMPORTANT IN HIS LIFE RIGHT NOW.

So just because they had tripet mean say they were meant for each other. So TTC couples are not meant for each other?

I wish God gives me this type of angel as wife. I will increase my fasting and prayers, I trust his faithfulness. Sister, please keep on doing good. God will put smiles on your face in due time, shalom!!

[size=18pt]chai!!! chai!!! OP i shout chai!! again for your husband. chai! uwaezuoke! see wetin my fellow man get under him roof, him dey misbehave. madam you are superwoman.[/size]

thorpido:
Handsomeness is one of the least reasons to marry a man.You have definitely learnt that by now.
Unfortunately,there are still many young girls who make decisions on who to marry by these poor reasons.

Be like say this guy resemble Oshiomole H

Buyers remorse.

bisifoundation:
I lived a very religious life in campus, and was not in any relationship at all. After school , I met this young handsome guy in 2006. Sincerely, I felt I didn’t not merit him because he is very handsome, while I am on the average beauty wise. The only thing that attracted me to him was the look. He was an hustler and lived a low income life. Throughout our courtship of 18months, He never gave me a dime. I came from a financially buoyant famiy, I therefore saw no need in asking him for anything, rather I was feeding him with three square meal. We got wedded in the year 2007, and I gave him the flower of my womanhood (virginity) but I was not really excited for just no reason.

My husband is a caring man, but nags a lot. He nags about the way I handle bathing soap, the way you arrange plates in kitchen, virtually everything. I most often skip for fear each time he wants to talk because I believe he wants to complain again.

I got a job before he did, but one thing I discover is that my husband spends his money without thinking about tomorrow and always depend on my salary to survive the family. In 2008, I gave birth to a set of triplet, and had to quit work to nurse my angels. He was very supportive then. He provided for all our needs and life was good. In 2012, my husband lost his job, I had to take over the family expenses again. I was running a masters degree program, doing many businesses, and still raising kids. I travelled every week in a bid to keep the family running. Each time, I complain about the stress I was passing through, he tells me I am lazy, that many women do more to sustain their families.

This is 2015, my husband prefers to allow me or my dad to pay the children tuition fee than for him to hustle. I am 100% responsible for the family upkeep. Every biz you introduce to my husband is downgrading to him. I am currently on my PHd degree, I am nursing a set of triplet, and still work hard to survive my family.

It is now that I realize that I married my husband because of his handsomeness, and that he is mentally very shallow. My husband thinks like a child and has virtually no plan for his family.

My simple advice for intending wives is this, looks (handsomeness or beauty) alone is not enough to choose a husband, marry a man that has great vision for his life, not the one that you will keep on dragging up.

Secondly, I believe my husband puts all the family responsibility on me because I was the one feeding him when we were dating. Please, let your guy know from day one that you need to be adored and taken care of like a beautiful flower.

To married men and women there, did you make some mistakes when choosing? Pls share with intending husbands and wives to help them make informed decision.

Kimoni:
Not sure I can blame your husband here.

You were feeding him 3 square meals before marriage After marriage, he would squander your money and depend on yours for survival. Till date, you are 100% responsible for the family upkeep.

So what has changed? Why should he suddenly change from the norm? Or why are you suddenly expecting something different?

I honestly don't get. Anyways, you've learnt your lesson, pass it on to your kids.

#Neverbeanenabler

You hit it on the head! She "bought" a husband and noe she is complaining because he has ran out his usefulness.

There is nothing the husband did wrong...he showed her the fabric of his character and she accepted it.

Just because I am a woman I must ignore the bullshit. No I cannot. Spade is a spade.

Story that touches the heart.

This is super story..............

Come to think of it, are you not even afraid that your husband can read the story of his family online. Just thinking, not as if I am in support of his stupid action.

Bisi Thanks for Sharing, I learnt a great deal. He will change, just put him in God's hands

My first post and wow thanks op. I felt like you posted this to me.
I screen grabbed your story, I'm going to keep reading it everyday till the end of the year.
You made me really ask myself why I'm liking this potential interest, despite the fact that he's one of those on an off guys, noticed he's character is not that great, but I chose to over look it while telling myself he has flaws just like everyone else.
No doubt he likes me, so does other guys, but the only reason I'm putting him above the others is his looks.
Sad I know, don't judge me guys, almost everyone is guilty of it.

Thank you.

zinaunreal:
So because you were feeding him we won't hear word again. That's the thing about women, anytime they take a man's responsibility they go public and disgrace their men. Ingrate

i just dont know why so many nlers lack shame.

Nitefury:


Ah.. Ruby Ruby.. I wasn't with my glasses when i read that initially na. Not fair o.. I'm a 110% ready to lay down for my family. The extra 10% is for you specially. Date nights, Vacation to Obudu at the peak of every rainy season, be sending you the good old school love text messages, I'll bake for ya etc.. I'll be the direct opposite of the man in this story...

hmmmmmmmmmmm!!!!! Interesting......

the fact is, the personality, behaviour and character of the person u hooking up with matters more than the looks, or financial strength. here is how i put it
personality/character- 40 percent, looks 15 percent, spirituality -35 percent, money- 10 percent

I denounce and reject such men...... Bt all d same mistake has bin committed, God will give her solution......... Beauty /handsomeness is never a criteria 4 choosing partner... Bt a gud heart.

LOClass:

I screen grabbed your story, I'm going to keep reading it everyday till the end of the year.
.

why till the end of the year specifically?


These are ember months, no bring winchy winchy come abeg, turn to Jesus instead.

zinaunreal:
So because you were feeding him we won't hear word again. That's the thing about women, anytime they take a man's responsibility they go public and disgrace their men. Ingrate

I don't think that she intended to disgraced her husband. However, she is at fault for the issues in her marriage because she allowed the behavior.

She is advising women not to make the same mistakes she did and women do have the tendency to expect change when we should just accept or reject the man for who he is presently.

Kimoni:
Not sure I can blame your husband here.

You were feeding him 3 square meals before marriage After marriage, he would squander your money and depend on yours for survival. Till date, you are 100% responsible for the family upkeep.

So what has changed? Why should he suddenly change from the norm? Or why are you suddenly expecting something different?

I honestly don't get. Anyways, you've learnt your lesson, pass it on to your kids.

#Neverbeanenabler

Hmmm ...the most well-thought comment I've read so far #BigUps
Moral: Never start what yhu can not finish

tpiander:
ok, what are we supposed to do or say now?

I don't understand what exactly the op wants.

If you have nothing to say, at least just learn from the op's mistake so that you won't fall victim!


In fact, op wants us to learn. SIMPLE!

Rushna:
I denounce and reject such men...... Bt all d same mistake has bin committed, God will give her solution......... Beauty /handsomeness is never a criteria 4 choosing partner... Bt a gud heart.

I know of some women who are married to ugly men that are great husbands and fathers. Good characters are more important than good looks.

Unfortunately, some women don't get it.

superstar1:
Story that touches the heart.

This is super story..............

Come to think of it, are you not even afraid that your husband can read the story of his family online. Just thinking, not as if I am in support of his stupid action.

Let him read so he can change for the better.

goldenruby:
Hmmmmm. Looks to me like there's really no rule that governs the marriage institution.
Well for me, A man's physical Beauty is absolutely irrelevant! Give me a 'gorilla-looking' man if he's got the most handsome heart and ready to lay down for his family, I'd be ready to compliment his looks

Liar.

Ok, what are we supposed to do or say now?

I don't understand what exactly the op wants.

Op, come and tell us what you want us to do for you.


the mod who threw the thread on fp sef, you get work so?

thorpido:
Let him read so he can change for the better.

He knows what is going on and reading about the issue online won't change him he has to make the decision to change for the betterment of his marriage or let the woman go.

As long as she is supporting him, he will not change because he doesn't think he needs to change.

iykedare:

D
Liar.

[img]http://media0./media/B7bLPuQgCJRKg/200w.gif[/img]

LOClass:
My first post and wow thanks op. I felt like you posted this to me.
I screen grabbed your story, I'm going to keep reading it everyday till the end of the year.
You made me really ask myself why I'm liking this potential interest, despite the fact that he's one of those on an off guys, noticed he's character is not that great, but I chose to over look it while telling myself he has flaws just like everyone else.
No doubt he likes me, so does other guys, but the only reason I'm putting him above the others is his looks.
Sad I know, don't judge me guys, almost everyone is guilty of it.

Thank you.

Now you know.It's good so you don't make the same mistake as the Op.

that man na pure definition of ozu nwoke

goldenruby:
[img]http://media0./media/B7bLPuQgCJRKg/200w.gif[/img]

MrsChima:


He knows what is going on and reading about the issue online won't change him he has to make the decision to change for the betterment of his marriage or let the woman go.

As long as she is supporting him, he will not change because he doesn't think he needs to change.

You're right.The decision to change can only come from him.