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Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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Every Guy Wants To Have A Taste Of My Pretty Younger Sister, I Need Advice Pls / 29-year-old Lady Caught Between Two Men Seeks Advice On Who To Marry / ADVICE On The Best Gift To Give An EX On Her Wedding. (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by mcnepow(m): 11:42am On Nov 15, 2015
I actually do not have any advice for a grown man that doesn't know how to end a relationship..


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6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by Nobody: 11:42am On Nov 15, 2015
grin grin simple !

3 Likes

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by imsuboi(m): 11:42am On Nov 15, 2015
this one is strong!
Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by yomalex(m): 11:42am On Nov 15, 2015
Prayer is key
Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by rukkyland(m): 11:42am On Nov 15, 2015
JUST DO IT
Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by megawax8: 11:42am On Nov 15, 2015
cc mizmycoli come and give a professional response....
Happy sunday by the way.
Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by mykemiley(f): 11:42am On Nov 15, 2015
D babe dey expect u 2 cum marry her......she don tire 4 d relationship.....

3 Likes

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by millionboi(m): 11:43am On Nov 15, 2015
tell m say u carry 1deadly sickness weh no get name....him go hate u!dnt 4get 2tank me leta

1 Like

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by ducramsey99(m): 11:43am On Nov 15, 2015
Guy u need to use. Ur head in this situation.....no matter d advice pple give u it won't be enof for ur own self discipline.....

1 Like

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by funkymatics(f): 11:43am On Nov 15, 2015
ok. see me finish syndrome is disturbing u. you never loved her in the first place you only like her but now situations have opened your eyes to see that she's better off being your friend and not your love. when u love some one its unconditional but when you like someone its cos of what you see in her which you must continue to see, however, nothing last forever.

solution: release the babe by making her know you just liked her. my own opinion.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by gohzieh(m): 11:44am On Nov 15, 2015
Bro! Yea stuffs happen and you see reasons why you can't continue with her.
Get a new hobby, even if its starting a course, or learn a new trade that will occupy your time that way you will distant yourself from her. I beleieve you spend so much time with that is why your emotions are tied. See her once in a week, once in 2weeks, if she asks tell her you travelled,or your new hobby is not giving you time enough.

2 Likes

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by gohzieh(m): 11:44am On Nov 15, 2015
Bro! Yea stuffs happen and you see reasons why you can't continue with her.
Get a new hobby, even if its starting a course, or learn a new trade that will occupy your time that way you will distant yourself from her. I beleieve you spend so much time with that is why your emotions are tied. See her once in a week, once in 2weeks, if she asks tell her you travelled,or your new hobby is not giving you time enough time
Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by AnaCheks(m): 11:45am On Nov 15, 2015
U need to talk Aunty Amara. Check her on www.amaraofficial.com or Google Amara Van Lare. U will be glad u did
Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by Nobody: 11:45am On Nov 15, 2015
Maybe the both of you should try and talk things out, then tell her your mind that you are no longer interested in the relationship. Don't know if it will be difficult for you, call her face to face and tell her your mind, allow her to say hers as well, then conclude by telling her you are no longer interested.

1 Like

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by Quinnlee: 11:45am On Nov 15, 2015
maybe u shud discover d energy or d impulse dat was alive at d early stage.Complacency happens even in marriage but we don't just give up.Try and rebuild ur relationship since a part of u and part of her wants 2still try.

2 Likes

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by Adaahjacob(m): 11:46am On Nov 15, 2015
Just b careful and follow u'r instincts..... Advice from ppl now will do u no good honestly, decide for yourself and finally u gon excel.

2 Likes

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by ZeesMum: 11:46am On Nov 15, 2015
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Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by Nelgenius4me(m): 11:47am On Nov 15, 2015
There comes a time when relationship will put a person in a downward curve- but if you are at the Base of your relationship and it is going no where, I strongly advise you kiss goodbye. Sometimes it is better to remain as friend and relish the good memories than being in marriage and suffer trauma. Stop holding long onto relationship that isn't giving you joy.

1 Like

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by dovetark: 11:47am On Nov 15, 2015
Mindfulness:



You can go back there.

Thanks, but Hmm, a lot has changed, we are not the same people we used to be when we first met. Am not saying it's impossible, but the energy we would use to get back there, why don't we use it to improve ourselves and better our lives?
Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by Nobody: 11:48am On Nov 15, 2015
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Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by Nobody: 11:49am On Nov 15, 2015
dovetark:
We've dated officially for over 3 years, I have to admit she's a nice girl when her heart is in it, but certain events have occurred which has left a once blissful relationship sour. Prior to the series of events that have brought us to this point, I used to feel like a superhuman with her in my life (for real I could do anything I set my mind to do and succeed), but all that has changed... Life happened!!! We've both been hit by series of events that have adjusted our perspective on how we view life which has undoubtedly affected us. Since the beginning of this year, we've been on a free fall with our emotions. We've not had intense quarrels neither have we had intense passion being together of late (I admit, they both spice up a relationship) and we have grossly neglected each others feelings. We both played our roles in getting to where we are now, I feel the door closing in fast on us and I can't stand this flip-flop of emotions involved.

We've tried taking a break and that didn't work, I have suggested severally that we just remain friends and end the relationship but I really don't know why she doesn't agree to that. We can't just stand each others bullshit anymore but still a part of us wants it to go back to how it used to be I guess that's the reason we've been hanging on.

I am not here to cry over spilled milk, rather, I am here to seek advice on how I would successful end this relationship without it having profound effects on my psychology and emotions while maintaining optimum productivity as an individual. Please your comments are needed and appreciated. Thank you Nairaland.

Please don't just read, I need your suggestions.

after you don Bleep person pikin for 3 whole years you wan run. That place you wan run go after some years na same feelings.

My advice to young people is things, you should have it at the back of your mind that the way you feel about your partner today is not the same way you feel about them some years down the line (romantically). That is why you have to build relationship on things more than how attractive or attracted you are to your partner. Life will always happen you just have to be prepared to deal with it.

5 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by Drfinn: 11:49am On Nov 15, 2015
OP, obviously your in a fix. You have invested much in this relationship, letting go seem difficult more so due to her refusal to end the affair. Times like this call for sober reflection.

You need to ask yourself what you truly want in life. Keep emotions aside and her insistence on continuing the relationship. This is your life. It's about your happiness. Talk to yourself. You did mention how incompatible it was at the beginning what went wrong? Did any of you cheat? Did the other party genuinely forgave if it happened? Is there some distance or some one in the picture? Can you both despite several attempts salvage the relationship? These and many more you should ask yourself.

You should realize that familiarity has a way of robbing relationships off its thrills and joys. Time test all relationships, this could be one of those times. It's pretty difficult these days finding a compatible partner. However, that doesn't mean you should endure a relationship. It should be enjoyed. You might consider having a heart to heart talk with her. Sometimes you need to be apart from those you love to truly value them. Wish ever decision you take know that you have the right to be happy!

4 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by dovetark: 11:49am On Nov 15, 2015
Lasgidy1:
If I were u, I'll commit murder and commit suicide, in that case, no winner, no vanquished!
Anyways, today's my bday. Me and shalewa go f_ck ourselves until there's nothing left of us

Even though I have bouts of depression, I am not and never will be suicidal neither do I support violence thank you. Happy birthday btw.
Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by creepsyme(f): 11:49am On Nov 15, 2015
dovetark:
We've dated officially for over 3 years, I have to admit she's a nice girl when her heart is in it, but certain events have occurred which has left a once blissful relationship sour. Prior to the series of events that have brought us to this point, I used to feel like a superhuman with her in my life (for real I could do anything I set my mind to do and succeed), but all that has changed... Life happened!!! We've both been hit by series of events that have adjusted our perspective on how we view life which has undoubtedly affected us. Since the beginning of this year, we've been on a free fall with our emotions. We've not had intense quarrels neither have we had intense passion being together of late (I admit, they both spice up a relationship) and we have grossly neglected each others feelings. We both played our roles in getting to where we are now, I feel the door closing in fast on us and I can't stand this flip-flop of emotions involved.

We've tried taking a break and that didn't work, I have suggested severally that we just remain friends and end the relationship but I really don't know why she doesn't agree to that. We can't just stand each others bullshit anymore but still a part of us wants it to go back to how it used to be I guess that's the reason we've been hanging on.

I am not here to cry over spilled milk, rather, I am here to seek advice on how I would successful end this relationship without it having profound effects on my psychology and emotions while maintaining optimum productivity as an individual. Please your comments are needed and appreciated. Thank you Nairaland.

Please don't just read, I need your suggestions.
dnt worry bro the relationship will die a natural death but if u want to fast foward it, start seeing anoda girl and dats it. good luck!

3 Likes

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by gentlesinna(m): 11:51am On Nov 15, 2015
Hahahahahaha u are what I call a real man.tanx for not bashing me.
Back to d topic
I dnt Rilli knw d kind of advice am goin to giv u bcs I hv never ever ended a relationship smoothly.i hv dated seven girls nw nd dey all ended up wit quarry nd fiting.d last girl I broke up wit we almost exchange blow.
So u see my guy I hv never had a smooth ending relationship
dovetark:


Lol, no matter how serious a situation is, when humor is thrown at me, I can't help but laugh... which I am doing right now. but at the end of the day bro, the problem won't be solved. So you can share an experience on how you ended a relationship with a girl before and I can learn from it. I haven't formally initiated a break up before and that is why I ask.

Same goes to you @Pennah
Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by Nobody: 11:51am On Nov 15, 2015
dovetark:


Thanks, but Hmm, a lot has changed, we are not the same people we used to be when we first met. Am not saying it's impossible, but the energy we would use to get back there, why don't we use it to improve ourselves and better our lives?

You wouldn't achieve it by putting effort into it. It can only be achieved with ease. Anyway. You are very clear about what you want and that is develop yourself without her. Whether she agrees to it or not is completely irrelevant. Tell her that it is over and move on without looking back. There is nothing else for you to do if you do not want to prolong the inevitable.

1 Like

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by san316(m): 11:52am On Nov 15, 2015
You hv told her you wanted to break up already. But don't do that. Marry her. You hv been dating for too long and I think you hv seen too much of each other without any strong commitment in place.

Once again, marry her.
Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by Nobody: 11:52am On Nov 15, 2015
I think you've been "over it" for awhile now, tried the best you can.

Best to be firm with her, cut ties and end it, since she trying to force you to be with her, it no longer love but desperation and control.

You will keep going through circles till you get to the point you despise n loathe her. She not your wife, you owe her nothing.

I'm sure you tried being gentle with trying to cut ties but she not listening. Be firm and honest, if she continues pleading/begging just walk out.

You got to be cruel to be kind at times, later on she will understand, it was best for the long run.

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Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by damola1: 11:52am On Nov 15, 2015
Guys can't seem to stand on their feet when they want to break up. Girls will go ahead to break up most times...

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by hollowpot15684(m): 11:53am On Nov 15, 2015
Whenever emotions has been shared, deir will pain after ending d relationship.
Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by defendedvictim(m): 11:53am On Nov 15, 2015
dovetark:


Lol, no matter how serious a situation is, when humor is thrown at me, I can't help but laugh... which I am doing right now. but at the end of the day bro, the problem won't be solved. So you can share an experience on how you ended a relationship with a girl before and I can learn from it. I haven't formally initiated a break up before and that is why I ask.

Same goes to you @Pennah
do u really have to break up?

1 Like

Re: Help!!! Need Advice On How To Break Up; by oglalasioux(m): 11:53am On Nov 15, 2015
Ask yourself if you still love her. Try to remember what made you approach her the first time. If those things are not there then simply end it. Find another love and move on. If there is no other woman in your life you can't let go. Simple.

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