nasha1:


stalker u wish! anytime i see a loose chicken around before i even address them,i check their profiles so 2 not lose myself to their dumbness.you are even justifying ur schedule 2 me
i am a very busy young woman,i would have love 2 stay and entertain ur lousy self but money calls.go find a part time job or something,u are even a nuisance 2 urself.

Yet you quoted me

Of course I would, you would not have told me your busy schedule without it

Busy woman

doveda:


I am not married and I desire very much to be IN CONTROL however I understand that some women desire to exist for just their families. And I do not care. Do you know why? I had a working mum and when the days she stayed at home because of strike, I understand that it is as much of a big deal as having a job.

Yup, you read that right.

i understand your point of view.also the op is making much sense..let agree to disagree.

oloyede252:
i understand your point of view.also the op is making much sense..let agree to disagree.

I am going to disagree with you

He is not!!!


If have to ask your girl-child that question, then you need to question your parenting skills

doveda:



You do not know what I want

A woman can decide to be married to her career, or her family or both!!!

It is her headache and her husbands not yours

It is not a defence mechanism, it is a common sense mechanism!

Are you telling me that women around you are not productive? Do you think we are stupid? . The desire to marry a financially capale guy does not translate to lack of purpose

you still dont get it.lemma ask you.what the best way to justify you going to school/formal education..

doveda:


Especially not in a society where a man can get away with almost everything......where a woman ambitions can jeopardise her marital life

Personally, I am not saying women should seek money but who the hell are you to tell them what they should or should not consider?

The audacity of this op sef!!!

He is NL's minister for women affairs ni. Bloody hypocrite

oloyede252:

you still dont get it.lemma ask you.what the best way to justify you going to school/formal education..

My viewpoint

-knowledge sake ...I am a sucker for knowledge
-back-up plan
-empowerment

Dad's viewpoint

-pride
-a form of inheritance/empowerment
-back-up plan

Gerrard59:


At the bolded, when they decide to stay single it's the same people like you who remind them of their biological clock ticking. Rita Dominic, Genevieve and a host of successful single ladies have been maligned on Nairaland for being single. You accuse the ladies of marrying for money, tell me, who wants to marry a poor individual? Even the average guy would like/want to marry a successful lady.

When Nigerian ladies decide to behave like western women by being independent(an average Nigerian man detest such ladies and smart ones too, yet cries everyday about the non-availability of such ladies) you remind them of culture, tradition and the need of a man to be the head when relationship/marriage is a partnership.

What do majority of Nigerian men want from their women? The height of hypocrisy can make the tallest man look like a dwarf.

Wished i could like this comment a million times. Too much sense!

doveda:


I am going to disagree with you

He is not!!!


If have to ask your girl-child that question, then you need to question your parenting skills

what do you know about parenting skills.asking that question is quite germane becos why will i sponsor my girl child up to phd level only for her to become a full house wife of a rich man.does that makes sense to you..

HaneefahRN:


He is NL's minister for women affairs ni. Bloody hypocrite

doveda:


My viewpoint

-knowledge sake ...I am a sucker for knowledge
-back-up plan
-empowerment

Dad's viewpoint

-pride
-a form of inheritance/empowerment
-back-up plan

you mentiond empowerment.which is what i have being making emphasis on.this thread is abt empowering women.the feminist movement didnt canvass for women to be full house wives but to empower them politically,socially and economically SO AS TO BE SELF DEPENDENT .so what is your point

oloyede252:
what do you know about parenting skills.asking that question is quite germane becos why will i sponsor my girl child up to phd level only for her to become a full house wife of a rich man.does that makes sense to you..

Yes, it does.


For example, my dad does not care he wants me to graduate with good grades. he considers it his responsibility and once he is done with me. It is up to me to continue my life. He is also 100% confident of his parenting skills so he knows that either way I am not going to end up hopeless.

oloyede252:

you mentiond empowerment.which is what i have being making emphasis on.this thread is abt empowering women.the feminist movement didnt canvass for women to be full house wives but to empower them politically,socially and economically SO AS TO BE SELF DEPENDENT .so what is your point

I have never referred to myself as a feminist

Empowerment is but one of the reasons for going to school. And staying home all day, should not make you less empowered. Some women feel empowered when they do things for the family not for the money. I do not believe that empowerment means earning your own especially in a setting where both partners do not mind sharing an income while the other partner provides the full family support.

You should also know that I do not mind house-husband


But then how many married female Nigerian graduates do you know? I mean graduates that are not willing to work or have a career

ENIMONEY:
so because her father cannot provide her food, she should marry a man that will continue to starve her abi?? You see ur life? Oponu. Better goan make money. This is why I don't like poor guys, their mentality is always poor.

Are you guilty?

I never said She should marry a poor man and if you were able to comprehend my post, I said middle class.


Moreover, when you see a man with vision you will know.

Both men and women should work hard. Heaven knows that I won't even date a girl with empty head (liability).

Many guys who are well to do today are afraid of getting married because of gold diggers like ya. True love is now scarce.

doveda:


Yes, it does.


For example, my dad does not care he wants me to graduate with good grades. he considers it his responsibility and once he is done with me. It is up to me to continue my life. He is also 100% confident of his parenting skills so he knows that either way I am not going to end up hopeless.

lols.seems you're a daddys girl.remember you mentioned back up as a justification for schooling from dad view.what back up will an unproductive housewife render to her father?.for me i believe if my girl child desire to be a ful house wife.there is no need sponsoring her advance studies.the basic and post are ok for a housewife because advance studies will be useles to her.dnt you think

Sunnypar:
You just hit the nail on the head..... Enimoney Stenon Bettydee Omawunmi85

Really?

oloyede252:
lols.seems you're a daddys girl.remember you mentioned back up as a justification for schooling from dad view.what back up will an unproductive housewife render to her father?.for me i believe if my girl child desire to be a ful house wife.there is no need sponsoring her advance studies.the basic and post are ok for a housewife because advance studies will be useles to her.dnt you think

Back up as in if I got tired of housework or some other job.


I am a daddy's girl. No, they are not. What about her kids?

A housewife is productive!!! She is productive to her family and to the society a large

doveda:


I have never referred to myself as a feminist

Empowerment is but one of the reasons for going to school. And staying home all day, should not make you less empowered. Some women feel empowered when they do things for the family not for the money. I do not believe that empowerment means earning your own especially in a setting where both partners do not mind sharing an income while the other partner provides the full family support.

You should also know that I do not mind house-husband


But then how many married female Nigerian graduates do you know? I mean graduates that are not willing to work or have a career

you should start identifying your self with them.(feminist)

lol@house husband.you sure.

As per you last statement.most of the female graduates i knw are working.not just staying at home doing nothing..

doveda:


They should not marry na

Marriage for me, is pleasing God and doing a favour to that lucky man

Lolzzz, for real See subjective idea . "Marriage for you is pleasing God" yet all you seek for is to marry a very rich man? issorite.
Well I am not against marriage ooo. But the way most of these women carry relationship and marriage is as if its a job opportunity. Make una no dey frustrate men Biko.tanks

doveda:


Back up as in if I got tired of housework or some other job.


I am a daddy's girl. No, they are not. What about her kids?

A housewife is productive!!! She is productive to her family and to the society a large

a housewife is not productive to the sociey ecomically or politically.

Doveda be a good girl and make daddy proud.be the best you can be.dont limit yourself..be the next hilary clinton of nigeria.

oloyede252:

a housewife is not productive to the sociey ecomically or politically.

Doveda be a good girl and make daddy proud.be the best you can be.dont limit yourself..be the next hilary clinton of nigeria.

I don't want to be Hilary Clinton!

Daddy does not mind. A full time housewife is productive to her family and a productive family makes a productive society.

virginboy1:

Lolzzz, for real See subjective idea . "Marriage for you is pleasing God" yet all you seek for is to marry a very rich man? issorite.
Well I am not against marriage ooo. But the way most of these women carry relationship and marriage is as if its a job opportunity. Make una no dey frustrate men Biko.tanks

Yes now

Blame the society and our culture

oloyede252:

you should start identifying your self with them.(feminist)

lol@house husband.you sure.

As per you last statement.most of the female graduates i knw are working.not just staying at home doing nothing..

I am very sure.

That was why I am faulting this article. It makes no sense. Married Nigerian women are trying so hard just like their husbands. The desire to marry a rich man is not the absence of my aspirations.

doveda:

I don't want to be Hilary Clinton!

Daddy does not mind. A full time housewife is productive to her family and a productive family makes a productive society.

okay.

oloyede252:
okay.

Don't worry

I am not going to be a full time housewife

doveda:

Yes now
Blame the society and our culture

Lol. Babe now you are being realistic. But I don't think society and culture should be blame. Instead blame poverty and greed.

doveda:


I am very sure.

That was why I am faulting this article. It makes no sense. Married Nigerian women are trying so hard just like their husbands. The desire to marry a rich man is not the absence of my aspirations.

oh God.not again.

doveda:

Don't worry
I am not going to be a full time housewife

better

virginboy1:

Lol. Babe now you are being realistic.
But I don't think society and culture should be blame.
Instead blame poverty and greed.

Nah

I disagree.

oloyede252:
oh God.not again.

It is not my fault na

The statements do not follow.

ChikezieU:
You missed the line the op is not against educating girls, moreover he said "most of the girls"... Not all

i dint miss anything. I know exactly what op is saying. His argument is that it becoming more of a waste of money to educate a girl since 'most girls' (whatever u guyz mean by dat cos i dont agree) will still look for rich guys to marry instead of being self reliant and make their own money. My argument is that there is more to education dan ending up being rich and all that. If we hv to ask dat ridiculous question op is suggesting we ask our female children b4 we decide and make up our mind whether to give our daughters education (so that it doesnt end up being a waste of money) then the same should be asked a male child too, cos as much girls who are out there looking for money with their 'bodies' after their parents hv supposedly wasted money to train them (as op put it), are also many guys who are also graduates looking for money who have resorted to 419, yahoo-yahoo, armed robbery, pimping, rituals and lots more. So i can safely say dat educating both males and females have the same risks and problems. Ur Male child who u spent money to educate culd still end up useless. The quest and obssecion for wealth is another issue on its own and it affects both sexes. The last thing that should be on the mind of a father or mother before carrying out any duty as a parent is ur childs gender. Just do ur duty as a parent, pray for ur kids whether male or female to make u proud, leave everything to God and hope for the best.

Toks2008:
It is no longer a new thing that after graduation of a male child from a tertiary institution,there is so much expectation from him especially the one whose parents are from a very humble background and had to make huge financial sacrifices.

After graduation,this male child is expected to do his best as regards the ability to provide for himself,his aging parents and also prepare to start a family and we all know the financial demands that come with marriage ceremonies.

As if this is not enough for the male child,the female folks who have spent years in tertiary institutions to have a sound intellect and ought to be a succor in terms of encouragement and financial support have become an additional burden.

Please understand this...there is absolutely nothing bad for a lady be a graduate or not to want,hope or desire a rich or financially ok guy...which lady will not want that?

But it gets even crazier by the day cos most of those ladies who have no opportunity of bagging a degree are unbelievably hard working as we can see many of them doing one thing or the other legitimately to be financially independent while many acclaimed graduates just hope for one unfortunate maga to buy them..how sad.

Ok lets take a look at this..In Nigeria,both the male and the female child go to the same private or public schools right from nursery to tertiary levels,we had the same educational qualification because the last time i checked the University as well as polytechnic degrees are awarded to both male and female...

We go through NYSC together and start looking for jobs in the same labor market in the same country.It is even easier for a female graduate to get jobs compared to the male folks yet these same ladies expect these same guys to be "financially ok" enough to take care of them HABBA!

What happened to equal opportunity to be financially ok since we are faced with same economy conditions. What sought of magic are these ladies expecting the male folks to perform? It even becomes more unrealistic and wicked when ladies are looking for financially ok guys in their 20s and early 30s.


This has made me conclude that its gradually becoming a waste of money and resources for some parents to send their daughters to school since they are likely to come out and dump the zeal and qualification just to start scouting for "financially ok guys" before they can think of making a headway for themselves in life.

So if that is the case,there is no need to get a degree since they don't need that to get a rich guy as they can use their natural body degree to achieve that thereby saving the parents hundreds of thousands of naira.

So i am advising every Nigerian parent to ask their daughter this vital question before spending a dime on her tertiary education and beg her to tell them the truth...

"Are you ready to go to school and acquire a degree to become self reliant financially or are you nursing the thought of going to school and latter come out to start looking for a rich guy or financially ok guy"?


Be observant to the way she answers and make up your mind.

Odiegwu.

one answer to your question... ladies are expected to get married in their early twenties, once she clocks 25, the 'go and marry' crew will attack but a guy in his early twenties has little or no responsibility so what is stopping him from going out there to hustle and make a living for his future family... mind you, once the lady gets married, she is expected to start bearing children which might affect her future dreams... To all the ladies out there looking for a guy that can give you a comfortable life, you are not gold diggers at all, these guys are just getting too lazy these days.

Well...you r right

Seventeen:
i dint miss anything. I know exactly what op is saying. His argument is that it becoming more of a waste of money to educate a girl since 'most girls' (whatever u guyz mean by dat cos i dont agree) will still look for rich guys to marry instead of being self reliant and make their own money. My argument is that there is more to education dan ending up being rich and all that. If we hv to ask dat ridiculous question op is suggesting we ask our female children b4 we decide and make up our mind whether to give our daughters education (so that it doesnt end up being a waste of money) then the same should be asked a male child too, cos as much girls who are out there looking for money with their 'bodies' after their parents hv supposedly wasted money to train them (as op put it), are also many guys who are also graduates looking for money who have resorted to 419, yahoo-yahoo, armed robbery, pimping, rituals and lots more. So i can safely say dat educating both males and females have the same risks and problems. Ur Male child who u spent money to educate culd still end up useless. The quest and obssecion for wealth is another issue on its own and it affects both sexes. The last thing that should be on the mind of a father or mother before carrying out any duty as a parent is ur childs gender. Just do ur duty as a parent, pray for ur kids whether male or female to make u proud, leave everything to God and hope for the best.