JesusDWay:


You have no idea what you are about getting yourself into, i advise you suspend everything including relationship with her. Trust me, people wanna divorce just a month after their wedding and that's what you will likely face if you marry her. Your eyes will suddenly open to what you are in for the rest of your life and you will wanna bail. You wont be the man in such marriage, i mean, this is a girl who have the gut to assault your own sister right in your presence and you have even attested to the fact that she's stronger than you, what do you think will happen if you have arguements in the marriage? You want her cuz she'll be a trophy wife, i pity your life, you'll know trophies can be lost, even Barca can lose their champions league trophy this season. Trust me, i dont see that marriage working, if you dont end up divorcing her, you will likely cheat on her in the marriage cuz you wont have peace with her and thereby open yourself up for temptation by other women. Infact, she herself can divorce you at the end of the day as she may not see you as man enough. You better throw away that your sissy love or feeling cuz as they say If love is blind, marriage will open your eyes, its better you learn from the saying than to experience it. If she really loves you, she will respect you somewhat. A word is enough for the wise

Greene66:
This Is why I say we should love foreign girls.

Foreign girls are the best. All dis naija no be here

#TeamForeignGirls

stillchris:
grip her by the throat very firmly and dash her against the wall or mirror. make sure it hurts her. den while choking her, remind her you are still the man in the relationship and if she wants violence you will not essitate to oblige her.

do this very briefly and let go. i swear bros she go comport.

she's clearly in the alfa postion and you either take it back by force or end the relationship

Inspinia:
Thank you all.

Inspinia:
I no longer know what to do. We have been together for 8 months and I want to marry her quickly. I have my reasons. She has been my childhood crush for years and now that she gave me a chance I don't want it to slip away. Many guys flock around her so before one asks her to marry him I had to do it first. And she is very responsible and definitely not a fling.

But I have problems with her aggression. A little thing she picks an issue with it and starts dishing out hurtful words to me. I always try to apologise and make her happy even when she is wrong not me just so she will be calm. It was working before now it no longer works. Whenever I try to make her happy she gets more angry and tell me I'm trying to patronise her. If I take her out on shopping she will be so angry that I'm trying to buy her with money that I don't love her.

My fellow brothers, what do I do? There was a day I had to invite my sister to come talk to her as woman to woman talk this lady pulled the belt on her jeans and began to assault my sister I'm grateful to God that I was there even my left eye is still bruised wth the way she hit me too that day. And the worst of it all is everytime she gets more angry and more violent.

I threatened to call off the wedding thinking it will make her rethink but it didn't instead she got angry that day and pushed me against the wall. God saved me beause if there was knife or bottle around that day with the way she was angry sh could have used any on me.

Please I need assistance from matured minds. I love her so much that I don't want to call off the wedding I want her to be wife but her aggression is too much. She get angry easily. She outrightly told me no sex till marriage and I can't do anything about because she seems stronger than I am (Yes she works out alot. Perhaps because she is a model or so i don't know)

I need help.

fejikudz:
Oboy u mumu die oo



see how low self esteem has reduced you to a loaf of agege bread.

Touchforfree:


If I may ask, does she fight about or getting aggressive with her neighbours or other pple as well ?.

sorepco:


May i ask...y is so hard to dump this lafy??
She does not respect nor fear you. She will kill you...

bimbor:


I'm sure its a movie script. If not then u are already on a spell to still be in that kinda relationship by now!! Like wtf!!!

Guyman02:
MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCE WITH
AN AGGRESSIVE WIFE

The choice is yours to make. My wife is also aggressive, I used to tolerate her excesses until the day I could not hold it anymore and we ended up damaging many things in the house. I had to leave the house for her and we separated for some period. She abuses me at every turn with unpalatable words and some times in front of my family and friends, I had to learn to retaliate with harsh words too out of frustration, not very pleasant but I needed to get my sanity too.
In my case she covered up those violent aggressive traits from me with her usual apologies any time she flares up until we were fully married and since then my house is like cat and mouse and she hardly takes directives from me. I tried to seek for divorce but family and church intervened and I had to bear the situation and keep hoping that she will change.

The reality is that her violent and aggressive behaviour strains me a lot and causes me stress that I almost developed HBP and I feel freer whenever I am away from home on assignment and to worsen matter she will even harasses me on the phone even when I am hundreds of miles away but at that point I have the liberty of switching off my phone or not picking her calls.

Just like I know you are passing through now, I spend many valuable hours in the day thinking about the situation with her at home and this affects my output at work, spirituality, emotion etc.

You still have a chance of doing what you think is needful. Nobody can advise you to dump her or not, that decision is in your hands.


From my personal experience, your simplistic solution will lead to more fights. He invited his sister for a woman to woman talk and counsel she used belt on her.
Aggressive women think that they know it all, it doesnt mean that they dont love you; they just think they are doing you a favour by dating or marrying you and will tell you to your face that you are the one who have a problem and that you dont know when 'somebody' (her) is trying to help you.
The ONLY solution is just to do whatever they say which they feel is always RIGHT even if that thing will destroy you. If she asks for money give her and not when she did not ask, if she says lets go shopping just follow her, if she says stop you stop, if she says go you go; anything contrary is seen as insulting her like the OP mentioned. I talk from experience unfortunately which is nothing to be proud about.

I have had a broken head with my newest phone smashed before just because I gave a lady a lift and answered a call from a female colleague at home whom she accused me of sleeping with her after all she (wife) has done for me.
My relations keep away from my home as they dont want 'problem' with her and it doesnt please me. My guy it is not easy.

Inspinia:


Yes sir, most of her staff in her office complain about how aggressive she is towards them but she doesnt flow with neighbours she is the solitary type. Unless they talk to her and most times it does not end well

Greene66:
This Is why I say we should love foreign girls.

Foreign girls are the best. All dis naija no be here

#TeamForeignGirls

Greene66:
This Is why I say we should love foreign girls.

Foreign girls are the best. All dis naija no be here

#TeamForeignGirls

Strahovski1:
Before I read your story you registered Jan 23 and did not say anytin till March 8? U wanted to post it then? But waited to see if she will change but nw it's worse? Right?

I understand. Let me read your story.

Modified- I've read your story.

Now my comment:

All I can say is, she is dangerous and she needs psychological help. From your description, she loves you. If she doesn't she would say No to your proposal and even if she said yes due to the heat of the moment she will later tell you I'm not marrying you. You know why? You can't do sh!t about it. She loves you man.

Sit her down and talk to her. Don't try to play boss with her. She is violent and ready to kill and be killed. Like you said she is stronger than you. She works out. She needs a gentle counsel.

Play this game called trust fall. Tell her to stand behind you on cement floor or don't tell her so she doesn't think it's a game just ensure she is standing at your back. And just fall towards the ground at her direction and see if she catches you. If she doesn't, take her to a doctor, if she does, man she loves you she is only upset about something and you kinda remind her of it so let her tell you what it is and share it with any therapist.

Also stop spending money on her. She clearly doesn't need your money. Only give when she asks. Take her shopping once in a while. And give her space. Don't ask for sex. Let her tell you what she wants and ask her this question 'Why do you hate me?' It works alot. She will break and tell you why If she does hate you because the woman you describe got balls. She can say anything.

Bye.

Inspinia:
I no longer know what to do. We have been together for 8 months and I want to marry her quickly. I have my reasons. She has been my childhood crush for years and now that she gave me a chance I don't want it to slip away. Many guys flock around her so before one asks her to marry him I had to do it first. And she is very responsible and definitely not a fling.

But I have problems with her aggression. A little thing she picks an issue with it and starts dishing out hurtful words to me. I always try to apologise and make her happy even when she is wrong not me just so she will be calm. It was working before now it no longer works. Whenever I try to make her happy she gets more angry and tell me I'm trying to patronise her. If I take her out on shopping she will be so angry that I'm trying to buy her with money that I don't love

My fellow brothers, what do I do? There was a day I had to invite my sister to come talk to her as woman to woman talk this lady pulled the belt on her jeans and began to assault my sister I'm grateful to God that I was there even my left eye is still bruised wth the way she hit me too that day. And the worst of it all is everytime she gets more angry and more violent.

I threatened to call off the wedding thinking it will make her rethink but it didn't instead she got angry that day and pushed me against the wall. God saved me beause if there was knife or bottle around that day with the way she was angry sh could have used any on me.

Please I need assistance from matured minds. I love her so much that I don't want to call off the wedding I want her to be wife but her aggression is too much. She get angry easily. She outrightly told me no sex till marriage and I can't do anything about because she seems stronger than I am (Yes she works out alot. Perhaps because she is a model or so i don't know)

I need help.

kpolli:


I disagree with you sir, she might have said yes because everyone of her friends is married and she wants to join the league asap.....

I actually think she doesn't love him and is very frustrated that she can't marry the man of her dreams so she lashes out at him

Inspinia:
I no longer know what to do. We have been together for 8 months and I want to marry her quickly. I have my reasons. She has been my childhood crush for years and now that she gave me a chance I don't want it to slip away. Many guys flock around her so before one asks her to marry him I had to do it first. And she is very responsible and definitely not a fling.

But I have problems with her aggression. A little thing she picks an issue with it and starts dishing out hurtful words to me. I always try to apologise and make her happy even when she is wrong not me just so she will be calm. It was working before now it no longer works. Whenever I try to make her happy she gets more angry and tell me I'm trying to patronise her. If I take her out on shopping she will be so angry that I'm trying to buy her with money that I don't love her.

My fellow brothers, what do I do? There was a day I had to invite my sister to come talk to her as woman to woman talk this lady pulled the belt on her jeans and began to assault my sister I'm grateful to God that I was there even my left eye is still bruised wth the way she hit me too that day. And the worst of it all is everytime she gets more angry and more violent.

I threatened to call off the wedding thinking it will make her rethink but it didn't instead she got angry that day and pushed me against the wall. God saved me beause if there was knife or bottle around that day with the way she was angry sh could have used any on me.

Please I need assistance from matured minds. I love her so much that I don't want to call off the wedding I want her to be wife but her aggression is too much. She get angry easily. She outrightly told me no sex till marriage and I can't do anything about because she seems stronger than I am (Yes she works out alot. Perhaps because she is a model or so i don't know)

I need help.

wristbangle:


Just because a lady is aggressive doesn't means her local counterparts will follow suite. I know that u will definitely marry a 9ja babe and we all know that ur mum is a nigerian.