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Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist - Romance (5) - Nairaland

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Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by kayles: 1:11pm On Apr 11, 2016
Kath5kouture:

Did you think I school in Nigeria! pls who can identify and correct the grammatical blunder in that sentence? undecided BTW if this is how the so called 'abroad graduates' speak and act then I think I'm better off in my country.
Well it depends on where she is right now with her schooling. If she's done with school the correct statement should be "Did you think I schooled in Nigeria" and if she's still in school then the correct statement would be "Do you think I school in Nigeria". No one is perfect with English though, even the English, Irish and Scottish people make mistakes. Americans are worse off. By the way I've seen everyone's comment, I had intended to be quiet but the grammatical correction spurred me to write. The op's story seem outlandish but I've experienced something similar. A female fb friend with about two mutual friends I guess, I had graduated at that time and she was still in school. I've never met her or knew she existed before meeting her on fb, so I decided to become a chat pal with her although I had some motives but they were to come in steps i.e gradually. She was pretty no doubt and I wanted to know her more. I'm the kind of guy that starts out with friendship first before I could ask you out or start feeling any specie of butterfly in my stomach. Back to the gist, I sent her a message of Hi or Hello twice on different occasions and she ignored them so I locked up meanwhile these messages had a space of at least 3-4months between them. All these happened in 2012/2013. Since then I had forgotten about her, although she's still a fb friend, recently last year in 2015 she sent me a message saying Hello, I responded like a gentleman that I am with a HI. Some other time she said Hello again without a follow up message and I just had to say Hi. Since then I haven't heard from her. Bottom line is some ladies later find out that they've overreacted or they've been way too pedantic about social media greetings. It's social media not your street, I won't jump out of your screen to molest you. Caution could now be exercised when you know their intentions or seem to know where they want to drift towards.

1 Like

Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by ladyF(f): 1:12pm On Apr 11, 2016
Cavemannn:

Maybe cus you might have come across as a man wink
lol even if I upload my pishure here, some people go still say na tif I go tif am... But it's like I will upload and show off some skin wink maybe I will get my first ever PM after grin
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by ladyF(f): 1:13pm On Apr 11, 2016
koife:

LADY F
koife grin
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by daveP(m): 1:27pm On Apr 11, 2016
Caracta:
This thread has sealed up my non-interest in Facebook. People like me shouldn't be on facebook honestly. Very lazy to chat and keep in touch...and then strangers? Oh well...


OP, some people are not on facebook to interact or become buddies with strangers. They simply want to connect with known friends. She was wrong to insult you but she must not reply every stranger if she doesn't want to.
hmm.
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by Caracta(f): 1:47pm On Apr 11, 2016
daveP:
hmm.

grin

1 Like

Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by dharay99: 3:30pm On Apr 11, 2016
.
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by Nobody: 3:51pm On Apr 11, 2016
alexisgist:
I could remember years back when I had just joined Facebook; I used to send friend requests to various people that I never knew simply because I wanted to have a reasonable number of friends on my friends list. A few people approved them, some ignored and others were so strict with their accounts privacy whereby I got banned by Facebook several times.
But whenever the ban was over I would do the same thing I was banned for till when I made about 150 friends.

When those people approved my friend requests, I would try to pal up with them. Some we became good friends till up to date and others weren’t interested in my amity. Among those people who weren’t interested in my friendship there was this lady (name withheld) who was so rude to me. She could ignore all my greeting messages. And she could let them pile up in her inbox. Well, I felt so bad when I was ignored intentionally. It looked like I was so desperate for her friendship and it seemed like I was trying to woo her yet I didn’t have that intention in my friendship towards her.

So, I gave it time. But one day I got so paranoid and I couldn’t help myself till I popped in her inbox. I sent her a message requesting to tell me why she wasn’t responding to my messages. Guess her response? She told me she never chats with strangers. I got disgruntled somehow. I then asked her why she had approved my friend request yet she wasn’t ready to be affable to me. She replied with insults and when I tried expounding to her that I wasn’t of any harm to her, she blocked me. Truth be said, I got a little hurt but I took it simple but not forgetting about it. Few months later I got hundreds of more friends and forgot about what the lady did to me.

Now a few days back that same lady who acted so rude and blocked me years ago came back to me crying and asking for my help about her relationship which was on the rocks. I read her message and I became speechless for a while. I couldn’t believe she had texted me after all that long seeking for my help. I went offline for some time. And when I came back I found more two messages from her pleading to me to reply her message. Hmm! I scrolled back and I read the old chat. I wondered whether she didn’t read through them prior texting me. I was now her only saviour and my friendship was now important to her.
Well, I chose not to retaliate. I gave her all my time and attention and I solved her problem. She became so happy and she thanked me. But prior we ended our chat I asked her to do for me only one favor. She said “please go on.” (She was all zealous in her reply.) I told her to scroll back and read through our old messages. When she read them, she became mute for some time. She came back after some time and she was so embarrassed. She apologized to me and I forgave her. She didn’t take my forgiveness to be sincere. She said it was too quick than how she expected. I told her it was sincere and from the heart. She really learnt her big time lesson and up to now she is still apologizing to me. She feels a burden of guilty all over her. She still can’t believe I forgave her but honestly, I did.

BOTTOM LINE
Many people act in such a strange way towards others on the internet and in their daily lives. They take everyone who comes their way to be harmful and with bad intentions towards them. Just because someone came in their lives the same way in the past and maybe they hurt or disappointed them in some way, they think everyone is going to do the same. So, they choose to act so rude and weird and then you wonder the world we are living in.

MORAL OF THE STORY
Lesson 1: Learn to forgive and and forget. Keeping anger over people who did you wrong and some things that hurt you is waste of time. It kills you and it steals your peace and joy but not theirs. And it sabotages your progress and success but not theirs. So, learn to let things go and move on to the new chapter of your life.

Lesson 2 : Not everyone that comes in your life is of danger. Every person we call a friend or we fall in love with was once a stranger to us but just because we gave them our time and attention, we palled-up with them and we became special and important people to each other. So, be careful with the way you treat people in your life. Someone you are ignoring today and regarding as a total stranger might be of help to you in the future and probably they might be your partner or spouse in the long run. You may be chasing someone away right now by giving them a cold attitude but not knowing that you are chasing away your only blessing. Please try to be kind, be social, associative, cooperative and amiable because this world is round.
Blessings,

http://alexisgist..com.ng/2016/04/our-women-be-careful-with-way-you-treat.html?m=1

So na so so girls you dey befriend for fb abi? You dey beg for friendship ,too bad. Personally I hate stalkers , it seems thats what you're. I know myself, I know my worth , girls write me first ,no be joke. Dey upload legit pics, they post reasonable updates ,them go start to like your pics and comment, then come inbox you on top. Guys wey sugi know this trick.
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by openmine(m): 3:51pm On Apr 11, 2016
Caracta:
This thread has sealed up my non-interest in Facebook. People like me shouldn't be on facebook honestly. Very lazy to chat and keep in touch...and then strangers? Oh well...


OP, some people are not on facebook to interact or become buddies with strangers. They simply want to connect with known friends. She was wrong to insult you but she must not reply every stranger if she doesn't want to.
If she didnt want to reply or have a convo with him,she never sud have accepted his request at d first place.....Why accept a friend request from a perceived stranger only to ignore the person's chats or messages?.....It makes no sense to me at all
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by openmine(m): 4:02pm On Apr 11, 2016
Ngokafor:






...Nigerian ladies,please be extremely wary with going on padi padi with random strangers you meet on social networks...a lot of these guys are creepy and are usually up to no good.


...Cynthia Osukogu was murdered by devilish guys she met on face-book.


..Guess what?,same silly Nigerian males talking trash here about females being rude on facebook and what-have-you called her a slvt and other demeaning names.


...You can accept friends request from idle Nigerian male strangers but you do not have to be FRIENDS with them!..roll with those you are familiar with and ignore creepy strangers,it is your right!.



..@op your story is fake and you sound like a stalker lipsrsealed

She also has the right to refuse a friend request but alas she accepted,giving the stranger or unknown person a slight chance that she is interested... cheesy cheesy
it doesn't make sense to accept a request from a stranger only to reject or ignore their messages...haba...for me,that's not wise!
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by goingape1: 4:43pm On Apr 11, 2016
kayles:

Well it depends on where she is right now with her schooling. If she's done with school the correct statement should be "Did you think I schooled in Nigeria" and if she's still in school then the correct statement would be "Do you think I school in Nigeria". No one is perfect with English though, even the English, Irish and Scottish people make mistakes. Americans are worse off. By the way I've seen everyone's comment, I had intended to be quiet but the grammatical correction spurred me to write. The op's story seem outlandish but I've experienced something similar. A female fb friend with about two mutual friends I guess, I had graduated at that time and she was still in school. I've never met her or knew she existed before meeting her on fb, so I decided to become a chat pal with her although I had some motives but they were to come in steps i.e gradually. She was pretty no doubt and I wanted to know her more. I'm the kind of guy that starts out with friendship first before I could ask you out or start feeling any specie of butterfly in my stomach. Back to the gist, I sent her a message of Hi or Hello twice on different occasions and she ignored them so I locked up meanwhile these messages had a space of at least 3-4months between them. All these happened in 2012/2013. Since then I had forgotten about her, although she's still a fb friend, recently last year in 2015 she sent me a message saying Hello, I responded like a gentleman that I am with a HI. Some other time she said Hello again without a follow up message and I just had to say Hi. Since then I haven't heard from her. Bottom line is some ladies later find out that they've overreacted or they've been way too pedantic about social media greetings. It's social media not your street, I won't jump out of your screen to molest you. Caution could now be exercised when you know their intentions or seem to know where they want to drift towards.
thank you bros!

They all think English is something you must perfect or know! PITY for our MENTALITY

1 Like

Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by amokeme(f): 7:43pm On Apr 11, 2016
openmine:
smiley smiley smiley nice one @OP..... smiley
Mine is different sha....if a lady accepts my friendship request and still does not respond 2 my greetings even after asking why she isnt responding,i delete her sharp sharp.....no time for such rude and nasty behavior....

it keeps making me wondering...

If you don't like chatting with strangers,why did you accept their request in the first place
....? Isn't that called stupidity

Did she accept ur request just to increase her number of friends on Facebook to later brag with it?

Some ladies even keep unread messages and friend requests as trophies to indicate their popularity online....
do you have to chat with EVERY person on your FB list? No, I don't think so... and as to why she accepted, like I said in my comment initially, people have different reasons for accepting or sending out friend requests.
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by openmine(m): 9:02pm On Apr 11, 2016
amokeme:
do you have to chat with EVERY person on your FB list? No, I don't think so... and as to why she accepted, like I said in my comment initially, people have different reasons for accepting or sending out friend requests.
True u cant chat with everyone....but since its the first time u r accepting such person,decency and courtesy demands that you respond to a greeting from that person...its the least you can do....then be polite and honest enough to let the person or stranger know that you are not the chatty kind of person or you don't always have that kind of time to chat....

True.....many accept friend requests for different reasons...Thats why its imperative to be honest from the outset,so that the person will not misunderstand or misinterpret ur gestures online....Its all about simple communication. undecided

3 Likes

Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by Caracta(f): 9:37pm On Apr 11, 2016
openmine:

If she didnt want to reply or have a convo with him,she never sud have accepted his request at d first place.....Why accept a friend request from a perceived stranger only to ignore the person's chats or messages?.....It makes no sense to me at all

You have a point. But we still don't know why she accepted. Curiosity maybe. Or OP's name is similar to that of a friend of hers. grin

But she could have answered his greetings then tell him she couldn't chat actively with him due to so and so. Simple!
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by openmine(m): 10:16pm On Apr 11, 2016
Caracta:


You have a point. But we still don't know why she accepted. Curiosity maybe. Or OP's name is similar to that of a friend of hers. grin

But she could have answered his greetings then tell him she couldn't chat actively with him due to so and so. Simple!
Abi? grin grin
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by Reeberry: 11:14pm On Apr 11, 2016
daveP:
Okay. angry
angryangry
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by Nobody: 12:44am On Apr 12, 2016
goingape1:
thank you bros!

They all think English is something you must perfect or know! PITY for our MENTALITY
What are you even feeling like? The guy only corrected you and gave some plausible reasons for your grammatical blunder! As far as I am concerned 'did' and 'do' are still two very different tenses. Anyone who knows the English Language obviously knows that a minute mistake such as that is enough to fail a question. undecided So much for YOUR mentality!
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by Nobody: 12:47am On Apr 12, 2016
kayles:

Well it depends on where she is right now with her schooling. If she's done with school the correct statement should be "Did you think I schooled in Nigeria" and if she's still in school then the correct statement would be "Do you think I school in Nigeria". No one is perfect with English though, even the English, Irish and Scottish people make mistakes. Americans are worse off. By the way I've seen everyone's comment, I had intended to be quiet but the grammatical correction spurred me to write. The op's story seem outlandish but I've experienced something similar. A female fb friend with about two mutual friends I guess, I had graduated at that time and she was still in school. I've never met her or knew she existed before meeting her on fb, so I decided to become a chat pal with her although I had some motives but they were to come in steps i.e gradually. She was pretty no doubt and I wanted to know her more. I'm the kind of guy that starts out with friendship first before I could ask you out or start feeling any specie of butterfly in my stomach. Back to the gist, I sent her a message of Hi or Hello twice on different occasions and she ignored them so I locked up meanwhile these messages had a space of at least 3-4months between them. All these happened in 2012/2013. Since then I had forgotten about her, although she's still a fb friend, recently last year in 2015 she sent me a message saying Hello, I responded like a gentleman that I am with a HI. Some other time she said Hello again without a follow up message and I just had to say Hi. Since then I haven't heard from her. Bottom line is some ladies later find out that they've overreacted or they've been way too pedantic about social media greetings. It's social media not your street, I won't jump out of your screen to molest you. Caution could now be exercised when you know their intentions or seem to know where they want to drift towards.
Thanks for quoting me with an epistle. We know you are a gentleman so am I. undecided

1 Like

Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by goingape1: 12:49am On Apr 12, 2016
Kath5kouture:

What are you even feeling like? The guy only corrected you and gave some plausible reasons for your grammatical blunder! As far as I am concerned 'did' and 'do' are still two very different tenses. Anyone who knows the English Language obviously knows that a minute mistake such as that is enough to fail a question. undecided So much for YOUR mentality!
did past do present!

Go with your MENTALITY! All I know is that this won't add any money to ya pockets.

Who even get your time self. undecided

Have a nice day!
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by Nobody: 12:55am On Apr 12, 2016
goingape1:
did past do present!

Go with your MENTALITY! All I know is that this won't add any money to ya pockets.

Who even get your time self. undecided

Have a nice day!
How do you know it won't add money to my pocket? Have you read my signature? You must not be the last to reply and it seems you have enough time. Signs of joblessness. undecided
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by cybriz82(m): 11:36am On Apr 12, 2016
No mind dat op jur I dey even suspect d nigga dn smoke fuel b4 cmin here.u send a lady a msg she no reply u.shey u no go liv am ni abi na byforce? D lady block n after 20yr she cme bk begin beg u cus u na u b d ambasador of wizkid n davido nw ba? Dnt evn knw why I comment sef.
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by flightz(f): 6:14pm On Apr 12, 2016
I beg to disagree! You made some good points but others are so bullshit. People take advantage of nice people so the only option is to treat people the way they treat with your guards on! Human nature is bad itself so forget the facade that some seemingly nice people put on.
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by Nobody: 10:31pm On Apr 12, 2016
ladyF:
lol is it just me or was anyone expecting a more touching story than this?

You can't blame her completely tho, a lot of females have their very cogent reasons for not chatting with strangers online. It sounds like you were sending the poor lady messages every hour angry so you might have come across as a creepy young lad. But how come nobody messages me. cry Is there something I'm not doing right? cry

It's [size=15pt]LadyF[/size] again grin grin grin
Hello LadyF, good evening. it been months we chat? how're you doing
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by Nobody: 10:46pm On Apr 12, 2016
alexisgist,, moral of the story

You can't be friends with anyone. Understand that some people find it hard to make friends that way. These people may be even be more polite and friendly than your so called friends.

That babe has done nothing wrong. It is selfish and unfair of you to give them names because they don't want to be friends! undecided

1 Like

Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by Nobody: 10:50pm On Apr 12, 2016
kayles:

Well it depends on where she is right now with her schooling. If she's done with school the correct statement should be "Did you think I schooled in Nigeria" and if she's still in school then the correct statement would be "Do you think I school in Nigeria". No one is perfect with English though, even the English, Irish and Scottish people make mistakes. Americans are worse off. By the way I've seen everyone's comment, I had intended to be quiet but the grammatical correction spurred me to write. The op's story seem outlandish but I've experienced something similar. A female fb friend with about two mutual friends I guess, I had graduated at that time and she was still in school. I've never met her or knew she existed before meeting her on fb, so I decided to become a chat pal with her although I had some motives but they were to come in steps i.e gradually. She was pretty no doubt and I wanted to know her more. I'm the kind of guy that starts out with friendship first before I could ask you out or start feeling any specie of butterfly in my stomach. Back to the gist, I sent her a message of Hi or Hello twice on different occasions and she ignored them so I locked up meanwhile these messages had a space of at least 3-4months between them. All these happened in 2012/2013. Since then I had forgotten about her, although she's still a fb friend, recently last year in 2015 she sent me a message saying Hello, I responded like a gentleman that I am with a HI. Some other time she said Hello again without a follow up message and I just had to say Hi. Since then I haven't heard from her. Bottom line is some ladies later find out that they've overreacted or they've been way too pedantic about social media greetings. It's social media not your street, I won't jump out of your screen to molest you. Caution could now be exercised when you know their intentions or seem to know where they want to drift towards.

The problem here is that you are not a female. If you were, you would know better.

1 Like

Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by Cavemannn(m): 5:18am On Apr 14, 2016
ladyF:

lol even if I upload my pishure here, some people go still say na tif I go tif am... But it's like I will upload and show off some skin wink maybe I will get my first ever PM after grin

Lol but first pm me ur pics, Ya kno like for clarification purpose grin
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by ladyF(f): 12:19pm On Apr 14, 2016
Cavemannn:


Lol but first pm me ur pics, Ya kno like for clarification purpose grin
lol oya check your PM, iz dia grin
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by kayles: 9:26pm On Apr 17, 2016
daretodiffer:


The problem here is that you are not a female. If you were, you would know better.
Well I know a little about female insecurity, that's what most feel and try to blame it on a friendly smile.
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by Nobody: 9:35pm On Apr 17, 2016
kayles:

Well I know a little about female insecurity, that's what most feel and try to blame it on a friendly smile.
It is not it. You are not the only one that wants to be her e-friend. She is a female, she is young, She is overwhelmed and she is human. She has to streamline those she would want to be e-friends with. People would send her requests on a daily basis. It is unfortunate if she decides not to add you to her friends list but you shouldn't hold a grudge because of it.

1 Like

Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by idriskabir(m): 10:48pm On Apr 17, 2016
such is life

Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by chigoizie7(m): 10:50pm On Apr 17, 2016
ladyF:
lol is it just me or was anyone expecting a more touching story than this?

You can't blame her completely tho, a lot of females have their very cogent reasons for not chatting with strangers online. It sounds like you were sending the poor lady messages every hour angry so you might have come across as a creepy young lad. But how come nobody messages me. cry Is there something I'm not doing right? cry

It's [size=15pt]LadyF[/size] again grin grin grin


I mean, if u can't reply someone's message, why did u accept their friend request in d 1st place?
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by chigoizie7(m): 10:52pm On Apr 17, 2016
daretodiffer:
It is not it. You are not the only one that wants to be her e-friend. She is a female, she is young, She is overwhelmed and she is human. She has to streamline those she would want to be e-friends with. People would send her requests on a daily basis. It is unfortunate if she decides not to add you to her friends list but you shouldn't hold a grudge because of it.

I beg to differ, if u can't be my friend, why accept my request? Even when u accepted the request and u can't be my friend, must u be rude about it?
Re: Open Letter; Our Women Be Careful With The Way You Treat Men- Alexisgist by Nobody: 10:57pm On Apr 17, 2016
chigoizie7:


I beg to differ, if u can't be my friend, why accept my request? Even when u accepted the request and u can't be my friend, must u be rude about it?
If she is rude, you have every right to forget about her. I am not in support smiley

smiley

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