I don't understand why some guys here condemn all ladies just because of what op has written, one will hardly believe that these set of guys were given birth to by a woman.. We all have our weaknesses, we must desist from generalizing an issue.. The fact that a lady or a guy has wronged you in the past doesn't mean all ladies or guys are the same.. In fact, if someone don't appreciate or leave you upon all the good you have done for them, you should be proud of yourself because for you to have been so good to that wrong person shows how well you will play your role when you finally meet the right person.

Please don't let anyone kill the love you have inside.

murphyibiam15:

your comments are filled with wisdom...dont tell me u are already married..lol

Smiles!! Yea by d grace of God, my marriage will be 4 yrs in July!!

eiBADAn:
Guy, well said. If you do 99 things for a girl, it's the one thing you didn't that she would remember. If I make 300k a month, her personal budget is already over half of it and when there's an argument, she remembers one stupid thing I didn't buy or get for her, I'm talking about my gf. What do I do in my own case? She's not working cuz she's still searching. Let's assume I have 700k now, her budget would be 450k when I finish calculating expenses. She would do hair, change nails, buy makeup, but expensive creams, buy new clothes even tho she just bought few weeks back. She wants to send money to her mom, to her sister, to her brother. She's owing her friend, she has to pay. I do all these and the smallest argument we have, she would suddenly remember one stupid thing I didn't buy for her. How long do I keep up with these. O ti su mi o.

Guy u be maga o... Is she your wife!??
You Don turn her family ATM.

UIA04:

If all you said is the truth
I'm sorry to say but


YOU ARE A BIG FOOL

i if you marry such a lady you'll live your life spending on her and her family.

That girl must be lazy and shameless.


Do you really earn that much,a wise woman would take that money save and start a business of hers. What if you guys break up. She'll be left high and dry. I bet she already has a back up plan for her lazy lifestyle if you guys break up. But you aren't aware of it.

A girl like that can't depend on one guy, because of oju kokoro.


I laugh in spiritual powers. You even give her family and she's just a girlfriend.

If I was you younger sister I'll curse you.


Please wise up teach her to catch fish or you will marry a liability and suffer all your life.

You can imagine... He has turn into her family ATM.

hhhhhh

queencalipso:
But you just said you guys were having an argument when she said the word. Didn't you say hurtful things to her too? And to think you even insulted her first. If you can't take her back wholly please let her go.

You are here now forming boss because she came to beg you without considering the hurtful things you said to her too that made her say those words to you.

Lets say u are the one that has been toshing me up for two years, and when there was a fight
I said am just managing u

Haba at boyfriend girlfriend relationship

Its only normal that we marry before the toshing continue.

akinsmyk:


we're the same on this. Like you stole my story. Mine is just a bit complex.

Can't count the no of times she had broken up coz of quarrels yet came back begging all times.

She say lotta tinz too which made me scared of ma future with her. She's got anger problems, I don't wanna masked with emotions. This is a lady I spend on even more than ma family members.

When we quarrels, she says there is no big deal in what I'v done and that she'll pay me back all I'v done in multiple folds. Its always hurting and funny when sh3 says this though she make up later that she said all that coz of anger.

No matter how angry I am, I watch what I say but she call me different unprintable names. Says she wished she had a gun and might shoot me for pissing her off.

The day she said that, I had began to doubt ma marriage to her. I love ma life

And u took all these. If u ever, i repeat if u ever get married to her, if it lasts five yrs then it is a mirracle. Run for ur life. Not all relationsi

alexistaiwo:
My girlfriend and I got into a hot argument last month which degenerated into a break up. During the argument, lots of hurtful words were exchanged but she made the fatal error of saying that she is managing me. This is a girl that I literally 'toshed up' and I had provided all her needs from 2014 we started dating up to that point.
Two weeks later, she came back begging to be accepted back. she said she said those words out of provocation since I was the one that insulted her first. As a sure guy, I accepted her back but made a promise to my self that I will never spend a substantial amount of my money on her again since it seems that she is the ungrateful type.
Her love for me isn't in doubt but guys wise up. Don't go bankrupt because of a girl, at the end of the day she will say that you haven't done anything.

I think i will say this. I was in this shoe and I bet it, she has someone better than you on the line she is still comsidering. My ex said it and broke my heart, then allowed her to come back which she later managed the two relationships.(myself & the other guy) not so long, i got to know and then let her go finally to the other relationship and i must say this. If you let her in again into your life, it wont be broken alone, but will be a boko haram attack on your life. Please open your eye and watch. She is not your girl

akinsmyk:


we're the same on this. Like you stole my story. Mine is just a bit complex.

Can't count the no of times she had broken up coz of quarrels yet came back begging all times.

She say lotta tinz too which made me scared of ma future with her. She's got anger problems, I don't wanna masked with emotions. This is a lady I spend on even more than ma family members.

When we quarrels, she says there is no big deal in what I'v done and that she'll pay me back all I'v done in multiple folds. Its always hurting and funny when sh3 says this though she make up later that she said all that coz of anger.

No matter how angry I am, I watch what I say but she call me different unprintable names. Says she wished she had a gun and might shoot me for pissing her off.

The day she said that, I had began to doubt ma marriage to her. I love ma life

And u took all these. If u ever, i repeat if u ever get married to her, if the marriage lasts five yrs then it is a mirracle. Run for ur life bro. Not all relationship end in marriage. Run for ur life.

Oahray:
em... No 'dears' please.

Do you mean that if your bf (or whatever you call him) slaps you, you'd easily let go because it a 'mere relationship' and not marriage? More like, take anything you see as long as you aren't married yet. Is that what you mean?

No na, that isn't what i meant, remember d poster said their were exchanging words, not just words but insults, and he insulted her first, so what do u except Only God knows the hurtful words he said to her, that made her used that word (managing), in which she has apologized already!! Am not trying to take side at anyone ooh!!

All am saying, is d guy should forgive her wholly and continue their relationship peacefully or, let her be Shekina!!!

Fine, she said she was managing you right. What of you the guy, what did you say to her. We haven't heard the story form the side of the lady in question. All in know is that you must have told her somfin that hurt her and made her say she was managing you. Some dude have bad mouth, if you don't spend on her na me you go spend on, must you add it in your write up. mtchewwwww

STFUareyouG0d:
The guy mumu no get rival. He been dey even form kingkong ontop BULLSHYT

Innnnnnn him mumulity no be here

MizMyColi:


Coming to the issue of discourse on this thread.

Your girlfriend was wrong to have made that statement.

But then, just like you, she was angry.

Before writing her off completely, have you tried to find out why she said she's managing you?

Perhaps is it because you've been trying to control who she talks to?
Perhaps she's not the kind that likes being bossed around?

Why do you have to think that managing you has to do with the money or tushing up that you give her?

First off, it is commendable that you agree enough to admit that the OP's girlfriend was wrong in making the statement, but then trying to rationalize as a way of justifying it is just wrong on so many levels. 

Granted, during the heat of argument, words are said by couples that they did not mean and cannot take back. But you have to agree that even in those situations, many of the things said are but a true reflection of what each person really feels inside, albeit voiced with no restraint. Within that context, there are some words that are simply unforgivable.    

Try to imagine being told that you are being "managed" by someone you presume to be in a serious relationship with. Take a moment. Then tell me if there is any rationalization or justification that can ever make things right with you afterwards. ‎
‎
And even if there is a remote possibility that those words were not meant, it takes great maturity to refrain from using words such as those of the OP's girlfriend that pierce a person's ego / self esteem in the heat of an argument.

Gold digger everywhere, only gold digger would say such...

queencalipso:

My dear see the way all these guys wan chop off my head o!! Na op mk decision, na him carry matter come nl after him Don decide, no be make we give our opinion?

Honestly I don't know why you guys are taking it personal. Am not saying the op should take her back rather he should let her go instead of making her believe that he has forgiven her when in truth he didn't. That is deception and wickedness to an extent.

my dear don't mind them

eiBADAn:


Honestly, there is no lie in all I said. I'm not trying to brag, but my dad is a billionaire and she knows this. I'm currently planning to leave the country to further my studies for the benefits of the family company. I had to apply for a visa for her which was refused. A blessing in disguise I must say. Now she wants me to try again. I have dropped her sisters CV with my dad tho he doesn't know them. She wants me to buy her brother a phone. Also my expensive wristwatch she wants me to dash her brother. Some times when we argue, she would be like, don't forget we are not married o. That got me thinking a lot. I talk to her mom so I don't know how to dump her without much hassles. I have a very soft heart which she's capitalizing on. I love and I'm sad as I'm typing this. I don't know what to do.

Abeg I dey look for work don't know if u can help.

eiBADAn:


Yes I love her and I think she does too. I am thinking of setting up a restaurant for her before I leave for a course in London later this year. She's from an average family and I believe I may be helping some souls. My father taught us to always help people whenever we can. In fact, she gets free treatment from our family hospital. I'm a bad guy too but I stopped been one early his year before we met February through my close friend. She refused to date my friend but chose to date me. Note, my friends parents too are also buoyant so is he too. She cleans, cooks, washes whenever she can. These are some reasons I'm finding it hard to let go. I jut have to start hiding anything that has to do with money because 200k finishes in 3 days on rubbish. I'm just confused

U be correct magamegamumu. Not intentional pls. Ask urself if that was how ur father stated with ur mum in building a business empeire am sure u wont be what u are today. She is just a parasite and a liabilty. U better get out of that relationship b4 some thing evil happens .

alexistaiwo:

she is not the one on my dp. the girl on my dp is my friend who loves nairaland but she refuses to open her own account so she uses my account to comment sometimes. besides she is beautiful (beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder)

You are just full of urself!

You are looking for a reason to break up jare!

Leave the girl let her go meet someone better and u keep looking for mrs perfect

absoluteSuccess:


you won't get married to any of those.

marriage is not a must

Guy if you can't respect your woman don't expect any respect from her, if you insult her expect the same from her,we are all human that can be angered by what we hear. If you can't spend any thing significant for her, it mean you don't love her any more so leave her to fly away.

Dejideji1:


Well I'm not surprised, it's only natural for you to defend your fellow woman. Even if she commits more grievous offenses you would still defend her. I don't expect any guy on this thread to take your comments serious anyway.

I take her comments seriously anyway.

eiBADAn:


Thanks bro.

Bro,
I'd be grateful if u or someone you know would support my project. Kindly visit my NL profile for my last topic posted. Call if you may for clarification.


Draw closer to God & do more of what you learn from the word of God.

eiBADAn:


Honestly, there is no lie in all I said. I'm not trying to brag, but my dad is a billionaire and she knows this. I'm currently planning to leave the country to further my studies for the benefits of the family company. I had to apply for a visa for her which was refused. A blessing in disguise I must say. Now she wants me to try again. I have dropped her sisters CV with my dad tho he doesn't know them. She wants me to buy her brother a phone. Also my expensive wristwatch she wants me to dash her brother. Some times when we argue, she would be like, don't forget we are not married o. That got me thinking a lot. I talk to her mom so I don't know how to dump her without much hassles. I have a very soft heart which she's capitalizing on. I love and I'm sad as I'm typing this. I don't know what to do.

honestly i wud like u to do me a favor. Let me forward my CV to you to submit for me in ur dad's company. Thanks

izaray:
No na, that isn't what i meant, remember d poster said their were exchanging words, not just words but insults, and he insulted her first, so what do u except Only God knows the hurtful words he said to her, that made her used that word (managed), in which she has apologized already!! Am not trying to take side at anyone ooh!!

All am saying, is d guy should forgive her wholly and continue their relationship peacefully or, let her be Shekina!!!

ok, sounded like you were saying that a relationship is too flimsy to get upset over things.

I get.

Psoul:
With due respect, all I can say is that you have not really got what it takes to keep a woman in the house especially as a wife.

1st you guys were having issue and each want to get the other hurt verbally. U said yours and she responded and u got angry.

Secondly, my brother majority of women will deny u ve ever spent a dime on them when they are so angry with u even the one u married. So this should not be an issue. If you are matured to keep a woman, this wouldn't even move a hair on your body.

Also learn to do good without expecting dat person to always come bowing for u every day, that's how to overcome the pain of one denying good u did to him.

Finally, learn not to argue wt your woman. Let them do d talking and u d listening if you are fortunate to have received the grace of bn patient in listening to their irritating words, else just walk away and come back when the cost is clear and calm. This will earn u more respect.

I did not see anything wrong wt that girl, not all women can easily apologise. U may think she did dat cos of money or help u offers to her. No, she did cos she loves u. Do you think guys better dan u have not approached her and she turned them down cos of you? Love her or let her go if you won't love her. Thanks

Bros nawa for u o. A girl who is a complete liability, only to clean, wash and Bleep. Finish 200k in three days. Nothing more . Is there any future. This is why we have a lot of failed marriages today because people have refused to use their head b4 they enter into marriage. A woman that is managing u will definately drop u when she sees a better maga to manage. 'She used to be a bad girl' according to the Op. Out of abundance of heart the mouth speaks.

Girls matter sha

To err is human but to forgive is divine, I mean in the real sense of forgiveness but if you can't it is better to part.

izaray:
Smiles!! Yea by d grace of God, my marriage will be 4 yrs in July!!

nice one dear....have a fun filled married life

eiBADAn:
Guy, well said. If you do 99 things for a girl, it's the one thing you didn't that she would remember. If I make 300k a month, her personal budget is already over half of it and when there's an argument, she remembers one stupid thing I didn't buy or get for her, I'm talking about my gf. What do I do in my own case? She's not working cuz she's still searching. Let's assume I have 700k now, her budget would be 450k when I finish calculating expenses. She would do hair, change nails, buy makeup, but expensive creams, buy new clothes even tho she just bought few weeks back. She wants to send money to her mom, to her sister, to her brother. She's owing her friend, she has to pay. I do all these and the smallest argument we have, she would suddenly remember one stupid thing I didn't buy for her. How long do I keep up with these. O ti su mi o.

I'm sorry to say this but if u are doing these for a lady u are yet to marry and who is not even sure u will marry at the end of the day then u are very stupid....When last did u even help ur mother or siblings?

Hummm.....

alexistaiwo:

this is another perspective I think. thanks

She didn't come back after realizing the mistake, she came back because she would be needing money to continue flexing. Anyone who tells you she came back just to apologize is deceiving you