bilulu:
I met this girl and we started chatting and later became close. I asked her out and before accepting she said she has a child. On hearing this my mind became so heavy to the extent that I felt heartbroken. Should I continue with this girl because I really like this girl?.... please I needed your candid advice.

she have a child not a disease,@ least she is being honest.

if her character is gud she is even a marriageable stuff, some ladies will neva tell u about their past out of desperation to get u in marrying dem but 4dis lady to have a bold step by informing u about her past I think u shud go ahead with d rship if truly u love her

AfroKnight:
Her loyalty and attention will belong first to her child then you come in second. If you can accept this, go ahead.

Most women loyalty is to their child/children first, whether your father the child/children or not

quintybabe:

Most women loyalty is to their child/children first, whether your father the child/children or not

Yeah. Thats true.

theEYe21:
still dump her ass

just the way someone you owe explanations to will dump your ass*... silly thing you posted.

i dont need your reply pls

There is nothing bad about it but should do this personal assignments . what happened in between the baby's dad and your wife? Don't bother asking her because she will tell you a sweet story for your hearing. Pray and becareful with the decision to be taken.

One question bro.
Is the child in her custody or the father's custody?
If in father's custody, can you stop her after marriage, from visiting her child? No
Can you determine what will happen when she goes to visit the ex? No
If in her custody, can you determine if the child will not demand to be his/her father when he/she comes of age after you have used your resources to train him/her? No

But the decision is still yours. Love is no longer blind.
Follow your heart but use your head.

awww......really amazed reading positive responses to this. at least 98% of responses here shows that people are now wise and know that not all that glitters is gold......

not because a lady is single or being a virgin is the criteria for being a good wife, and also, not that it is advisable for ladies to get pregnant out of wedlock.

most victims of such does not plan to be in such situation, and most times when i see ladies in such situations my heart bleeds, not because its gonna be difficult to settle down , but because of the stigma and emotional disorders that follows being a single mom.

my prayer this day is that God Almighty will continue to protect them and keep opening guys eyes to see that they were actually innocent and wouldn't have wished for such to befell them.

my advice for ladies is to always open up to guys that shows seriousness in settling down with them, do not for any reason hide your pas of such, because the truth is that, "what will be will be"!

God Bless our guys of today, God Bless us all!

we demons only chop and clean mouth

Money over B.tches

For ever telling u the truth before hand, I think she's one of the real deal.Girls truly love guys when they have made some indelible mistakes which in the real sense they don't dream of making. Guy go ahead because she learnt her lesson and u might be the lucky one. Why? because she's so tensed feeling that she might not get genuine love because she has given birth because a lot of guys detests this.

MY BROTHER, Its not about "wud u prefer a girl with several aborted babies?
even at that, which gul can boast she never had an abortion, at least before 28?

Except u dont have marriage in mind for her, if you do, as a guy like you, i wud advise u against it.
The truth is, it will all seem rosy until you get in. The several never imagined oddities wud then pour out.

The points above are my personal opinion sha.

Being a single mom is definitely a great feat ,irrespective of the circumstances surrounding the child's birth.if you really love her ,it's nothing to worry about.focus on building a thriving relationship with her am sure there are loads of lovable things about her,it all should be enough to make u stay.

bilulu:
I met this girl and we started chatting and later became close. I asked her out and before accepting she said she has a child. On hearing this my mind became so heavy to the extent that I felt heartbroken. Should I continue with this girl because I really like this girl?.... please I needed your candid advice.

send me her phone number let me marry her

bilulu:
I met this girl and we started chatting and later became close. I asked her out and before accepting she said she has a child. On hearing this my mind became so heavy to the extent that I felt heartbroken. Should I continue with this girl because I really like this girl?.... please I needed your candid advice.

What should bother you is your happiness, not if the lady has a child or not.

If you've been happy with her since you started dating her, then by all mean, continue, don't let such things be a distraction to you.

vchykp:


my dear brother i will advice you to continue because with the sound of your voice you truly love her, single mum or not, thats not a cretaria, if you are comfortable with her character, then dont think twice because even d ones with no kids has aborted and the ones that seems to be virgin has akward character, so no one is perfect, even u..! your problem with her should be her assuring you that she won't go back to her EX.. and pls advice her to give the kid to the fada if you really want to settle with her #bestADVICE

good advice but what if the father did't want the kid?

be careful with the father cause he might not leave you guys in peace

ITbomb:
And here I am looking for a single mum to settle down with.

I believe they are more loyal and committed to staying together (though I will prefer her child to be a girl)

very wise man. Getting two puzzles for the price of one. Jus let the girl reach 18, o.

This is y I luv dis forum, very educating as we hv d best brain and sincere brotherhood/sisterhood relationship.

As for the post, bro, love is wat matters.

I have a quick question.

A lady who has aborted several times or even once plus the one that had the child and flushed it down the toilet or left it in a trash bin


AND


The one who had the baby and raised the child through all hurdles .


Please who is a single mother amongst these set of people?

vchykp:


my dear brother i will advice you to continue because with the sound of your voice you truly love her, single mum or not, thats not a cretaria, if you are comfortable with her character, then dont think twice because even d ones with no kids has aborted and the ones that seems to be virgin has akward character, so no one is perfect, even u..! your problem with her should be her assuring you that she won't go back to her EX.. and pls advice her to give the kid to the fada if you really want to settle with her #bestADVICE

how can you ask a mother to give up her child

bilulu:

if I understand ur post bros I should go ahead

These millennials are so funny . So, you need the approval of a random stranger to date a girl? Trust me you're gonna come up against tougher decision making scenarios as a man, and there's no hard and fast rule or a one-size-fits-all rule when it comes to matters of the heart. I mean only you can make this decision, and if it's the wrong one, take the positives from that experience & move on, never make the same mistake twice.

Katier00:
how can you ask a mother to give up her child

its not by force oh, but the OP will u understand when the time comes

enomakos:
good advice but what if the father did't want the kid?

thats am exceptional case, then she should comfortably keep the kid.

You have the decision to make Bro, but for me I will never in my life marry a single mother, I don't have anything against them ooo.
Never!.

vchykp:

thats am exceptional case, then she should comfortably keep the kid.

good

bilulu:
I met this girl and we started chatting and later became close. I asked her out and before accepting she said she has a child. On hearing this my mind became so heavy to the extent that I felt heartbroken. Should I continue with this girl because I really like this girl?.... please I needed your candid advice.

It depends on whether the father of the child still have heavy influence
in her life. If that is the case run for your life! for you might lose your
peace in the process, if not you can go ahead.

rosalieene:
Tomorrow, don't blame young girls for undergoing abortion. This is the stigma a lot of them are trying to avoid.
which is the stigma of been a single mum

Young unmarried girls shouldn't get pregnant in the first place instead of
killing babies, prevention is better than cure!

Jimi23:


How can u tell that he can easily lay with her? U talking nonsense.

It is the truth, many baby mamas wish the child's father will come back,
the father's know this and some irresponsible one do exploit their baby
mamas emotion to get whatever they want.
Mind you, I am speaking from experience.

bilulu:

so wat u saying is if truly I luv her I should accept her like dat

...and her child, mind you.

SucreB:
awww......really amazed reading positive responses to this. at least 98% of responses here shows that people are now wise and know that not all that glitters is gold......

not because a lady is single or being a virgin is the criteria for being a good wife, and also, not that it is advisable for ladies to get pregnant out of wedlock.

most victims of such does not plan to be in such situation, and most times when i see ladies in such situations my heart bleeds, not because its gonna be difficult to settle down , but because of the stigma and emotional disorders that follows being a single mom.

my prayer this day is that God Almighty will continue to protect them and keep opening guys eyes to see that they were actually innocent and wouldn't have wished for such to befell them.

my advice for ladies is to always open up to guys that shows seriousness in settling down with them, do not for any reason hide your pas of such, because the truth is that, "what will be will be"!

God Bless our guys of today, God Bless us all!

I won't blame the guys who are wary of baby mamas.
It is not uncommon to find some baby mamas hoping
and wishing that their "true love" will one day return.

I am sure most guys won't be bothered about marrying a
baby mama if they are sure they won't be competing with
some "other guy" for the wife's attention.

Competing for love while married is the worst nightmare any
man will want to avoid.

I am of the opinion that guys should see if the relationship can
work rather than judging from afar.

neocortex:


It is the truth, most baby mamas which the child's father will come back,
the father's know this and some irresponsible one do exploit their baby
mamas emotion to get whatever they want.
Mind you, I am speaking from experience.

Even if u are speaking from experience, u certainly cannot be speaking for all baby mamas because i know some who dont ever want to see even the shadows of their baby daddies out of resentment for them.