Eketem:


This is why sometimes parents insist one should marry within their class to avoid the spouse who will permanently hold your background against you and emotionally blackmail you for every achievement.

He thinks it is her job to keep the marriage, he thinks he can keep her hanging without divorcing her, I blame her because she is begging him and opening posts to ask for advise, if she had womaned up and called his bluff he won't be so rude and arrogant

elektra:

I don't know why you are referring your version as the true story, this is the exact story your wife told us.

Now let's be honest with each other, I know you know that the document should not be changed to your name ONLY.
She put in 100% of her part of the profit into that house. You split yours into three, contributed a lot less than she did. Why do you feel you deserve to have your name ONLY on the document? Why aren't you asking for both your names on the document?

You are planning to take away something very precious to your wife (her kids) because you want to cheat her out of the house.
You know your wife will probably choose her kids over the house, aren't you being wicked?
So this is how your wife will entirely lose out of that business that she worked so hard for?
Once she changes the document to your name, you will own both your parent's house and the house your wife built. And she will have nothing to show for her sweat

You claim you did not mean it when you asked her to leave the house. I don't believe it, because if you can cheat her entirely out of her efforts like this then you likely meant what you said

elektra:


Oga, you are funny oh.
So the woman is 99% responsible for the success of an institution in which the man is the head.
If you have a traditional marriage, then the MAN as the head, is responsible for the success of the home.
If you have more of a partnership in your marriage, then both the man AND woman are responsible for the home.
Do not shift your responsibility to your wife when it is convenient.
U lack understanding

Respect55:

Maybe he should have bn screaming "sisoge's house" Now her marriage is about to hit the rocks, hope u an move in with her in that house.
Nonsense

Ziggylady:



Really??..and do you know the number of women feeding their husbands??....

eyinjuege:
How you had the audacity to even mention your wife should leave a home she has labored for beggars belief.
She brought the business idea, she brought her own share of the money, you guys made money and shared it equally , you spent your own share on important matters too, she bought the land and starts building , you built your parents home which is also important, yet your mouth was not heavy enough to ask your wife to pack out?
You are a devil sir, no matter how you try to paint it. A destiny destroyer. Any body that decides not to see your evil ways will be treated same way you did your wife, you didn't want her to eat the fruit of her labor.
Spare me the BS of loving her, and just joking with her about that rubbish that came out of your mouth that she should pack out.
I wish you family the best sha, but i would still advice your wife to keep her property in her name. If her work allows a transfer to where you are based, she may follow you, otherwise let her face her work.
The children should stay where it makes sense for them to. If it would affect their schooling, let them stay back where they are. If they are old enough, they can equally stay with their father. Nothing wrong with that, their mother can always visit.

sisisioge:


You've got to learn to argue constructively dude...pls try. Cheers.

metro10:
Mr. Man, you are very deceptive. I won’t buy your lies. I know the game you were playing on your woman. My dad did play that same game on my mother, until she wised-up.

You used your part to take care of your dad and used the rest to build a home for your parent and still expect to be treated as co equal in the real estate? Others can lie to you to inflate your ego, I won’t. You did tell her to leave the house, mistake number one. We wouldn’t be talking about this this way today, if she was dumb and stupid not to have used her name. The lady would be on the street today with no where to go. You’re here telling us it was a joke. Stop lying. I believe you have an affair. You want to push her out, bring in another lady and treat her like a fool.

She was wise and thank God for that. My dad did the same thing to my mother. He will use her cars, trash them and still push her out. She built a house, he drove her out, sold the house and messed her up. Finally, she got some common sense, built another house and gave me the documents as her first son. That he couldn’t take. My dad was like take my mums money, squandered them on the other woman and still come to trash her.

Ladies, please be wise! Imagine he saying she should change the documents to his name ONLY. Thief. Ole. Be a man, go build a house, bring them all in there. Let her rent her house for investment purposes. The true test of your love for her is to do this and prove to her, your kids and US that you truly love your FAMILY!

Don’t deceive this man to deceive the wife. God is watching you all!

tartarus:
And some nairaland males will hop on this thread and support this "husband" cos they see every marital issue as males vs females SMH.

Please guys say the truth and shame the devil! Women are human beings for crying out loud!

ExtraExtra:
Women are the backbone of the family, they make or mar the home, since they help bring life to the world suffice it to say they sum up what we call family, 99% of successful, longlasting home or family is the ability of the woman to hold the "forte".

My attention was drawn to this forum and this topic https://www.nairaland.com/4617351/husbands-pride-wants-ruin-home#69371294 and it is sad that most people drew conclusion on a one sided story though i wouldnt blame those involved because they judged based on what was said and the individual involved needed public validation for her wrong doing, a public display i dont approve of but since external persons and relations are already involved i'd like to clear some details.

"Dee" comes from a very well to do family while i dont so when we got married, i made her feel we are in this together, not one above the other but as partners in EVERYTHING. To be fair to her she brought up the business idea we did years ago, in other to put forth money to start up, i made sure i had equal money as her for it, goal was to own a property, build et al. Unfortunately my dad's ailing health deteriorated to the extent that he had to be flown out, when the profit came, i told her and she agreed, she decided we split it into two so she use hers for the initial plan. As the first born i went with my dad, back here she got the property and started building, when i came back the remaining money with me was used to complete it, what was left was used for my parents house. Being a trust worthy person i feel she is, i didnt bother to check documents cos i felt she would do the right thing by putting both our names which she kept in a bank.

Now, i work and own other businesses so i'm always in contact with alot of people from both genders so to her she feels i may have lost guard by cheating which is not true: i dont have password on my phones, i always make and receive calls right in front of her but she still think i'm hiding something and that was the genesis of the problem weeks ago, i rebuked her to cut it out immediately but she was out for blood, she insulted me like never before, when i didnt give her face, she extended her TOXIC words to my parents, my family, my background and my personality, that was when i lost it, if not for my cousin that was there i would have hit her, out of anger i told her to get the hell out of the house which of course i didnt mean, then she shocked me saying the house is ONLY in her name, i was numb and speechless, in other for me not to react in a brutal way i left the house, told her i would never step there again if she doesnt change it to my name ONLY. My cousin who was there when it happened told my people, they called me so i had to explain things, right now her family knows what happened and none is supporting her.

YES i said she should put my name only cos she belittled and betrayed me which tells me if it was in both our names she will raise shoulder and feel above me.YES i requested for transfer and i will go through with it, i cannot be away from my kids and still be in the same state, it doesnt make, when it is sucessful, i will get a place conducive amd comfortable for my kids, they will be with me. I told her recently not to bother with the name change anymore, she can have the house all to herself for all i care.

I wont divorce her because i dont believe in that, once i move with the kids she can come along if she wants but right now we are seperated. I wanted a partner, she displayed stupidity not smartness, what the future holds i dont know, she made her bed she should lay on it.

PrecisionFx:
Stop telling ur wife to pack her bags n leave the house.Don't say it as a joke n don't claim u said it out of anger.

dabiton:
I think you Oga are very childish for bringing 'your side of the story' to complete strangers on social media just like your wife did.
I blame you for announcing your home to strangers, mostly unmarried kids to judge. So what did you hope to get by washing your dirty linen in public?
Now go back home, have a re-think, accept where things got wrong on your own path and get to work rebuilding the home YOU destroyed.
I am a married man and the only advice I will give you is that "Not even the closest person(friends, parents etc) to you should know about a problem you have in your home. it is a project you initiated and if it fails you can only have an excuse but you have failed all the same", only ever share the good side/strengths of your partner, NEVER their weakness.

Now get off Nairaland, and call your wife and have a honest conversation, not settle a case oo, because there is not case to settle!

YOU quit using your marriage as a source of entertainment and amusement to complete strangers!

Those kids need to have a MAN in their lives not EXCUSES!
if you wanna talk fine but I am not going to discuss what happened, just HOW YOU SHOULD NEVER LET THINGS SPIRAL OUT OF YOUR CONTROL!!!

Now, Get to work!!!

utenwuson:
those ones aren't men any longer, cos the women feeding them surely will be throwing it at their face and thing is since they are lazy sisi men, they can't react.

4601CE:
In my opinion …
You have made the best decision. Stay away from that woman.
I’ve seen a similar thing happen before ,The man is dead now ...

Saff:
When you try to explain yourself but still end up sounding ridiculous anyways. Your thread proves to us that your wife is right. Drop your ego, it won’t get you far in life.

Biggest downfall of a man is his ego. It blocks so many blessings, and it’s blocking yours. You’re blessed and you don’t even know it smh.