michelin89:

She is just 5"4.

And she must have the fat in the wrong places reason why it's so evident to her bf.

She should come down to at least 62kg.

If what she is saying is accurate- 5'4 and a size 10, is not remotely  fat, she is 154 pounds- How much more weight could one at this weight  have at  5 ft'4 that is in the wrong places?? Average height for a woman is 5 ft 3   and  she is very near a normal  and healthy BMI ( acording to medical professionals)!  She possibly could stand to loose a few pounds- and most folks these days could also! She should come down to what she is most comfortable with, and not him. She should be healthy for the sake of her own personal gain- not to suffice her fiance!! I would be able to understand if she was skinny when he met her, but gained weight-- but she was bigger before- and has even worked to loose it!!!  What more does this guy want- after this then what will it be?? Perhaps he hasnt seen any recent pics- but never the less he needs to get a clue!!

michelin89:

Exactly my point.

I am also 5"4 and have fat thighs. I know wetin I dey talk. A lot of girls weigh less than me and they are just about the same height, yet they have the fat belly syndrome.

No disrespect intended but-Fat is fat no matter where it is! Healthy is healthy, !! The major issue I think deals with the man she is calling her fiance!!! Would you loose weight in your thighs because you fiance who claimed to love you in the beginning now seen you as fat because of his friends ? At the end of the day I guess it is really about how comfortable are you with your own body image!! Obviously she wasn't - and she has worked to bring it down- but still not good enough for him!!! Its hard enough being judged by society- but the man you are going to spend the rest of your life with?? That is too much to bare!

Ladyjide:

No disrespect intended but-Fat is fat no matter where it is! Healthy is healthy, !! The major issue I think deals with the man she is calling her fiance!!! Would you loose weight in your thighs because you fiance who claimed to love you in the beginning now seen you as fat because of his friends ? At the end of the day I guess it is really about how comfortable are you with your own body image!! Obviously she wasn't - and she has worked to bring it down- but still not good enough for him!!! Its hard enough being judged by society- but the man you are going to spend the rest of your life with?? That is too much to bare!

Lose fat in my thighs? Those are my treasure. But I repeat: she has the fat in the wrong places. Fat is not fat.

Fat breasts are not seen as a problem, neither is a fat ass.

But fat arms and a fat belly are.

feeling too lazy to read all 13 pages of response but i am sure there will be some crazy answers but errmm yeah i will say you have 2 options. ONLY 2 options. you have to do one or the other for your happiness. OK. option
1, lose the weight and marry him.
2, fashy him if you cant lose the weight.

anything besides the above 2 option will bring you misery

michelin89:

She is just 5"4.

And she must have the fat in the wrong places reason why it's so evident to her bf.

She should come down to at least 62kg.

u r not in d position 2 tell her what 2 do. .by d way,u don't have fat thighs. u r not orobo.
it may interest u 2 know that,some men truly appreciate big women.
i have dated women over 150kg. . .70kgs is nothin.

martin1:

u r not in d position 2 tell her what 2 do. .by d way,u don't have fat thighs. u r not orobo.
it may interest u 2 know that,some men truly appreciate big women.
i have dated women over 150kg. . .70kgs is nothin.

Ahahahahahahahha! You know me abi? Blind amebo.

michelin89:

Lose fat in my thighs? Those are my treasure. But I repeat: she has the fat in the wrong places. Fat is not fat.

Fat bosoms are not seen as a problem, neither is a fat backside.

But fat arms and a fat belly are.

Exactly- where she has her fat may be her treasures, (lol) and  we can agree to disagree---fat is fat----- !! Fat bosoms are not seen as a promblem for some, and you are right neither is a fat backside, but for some these are PROMBLEMS, Some men dont like any fat on their woman!! We cant be sure if this isn't the case in her situation!!! For some once fat stops growing in the bosom and thighs- it then goes to the next spot- hopefully it wont be a belly!!!  Bottom line- and I am not in any position to judge - just stating my opinion-- Just be healthy- and fat is not healthy!!

Micheline--There's no need 2 exchange words with u.
i I already noticed u like 2 run chubby women down
Everyone is entitled 2 their likes and dislikes. .to each their own.

@ 27 You should be able to understand urself more. Appreciate ur wellbeing and live life to the fullest.

martin1:

Micheline--There's no need 2 exchange words with u.
i I already noticed u like 2 run chubby women down
Everyone is entitled 2 their likes and dislikes. .to each their own.

Then scram!

@ poster, how else can u make urself look more attractive to ur guy?
i know u must have tried so much in reducing ur weight but you can do better.
for ur guy, he is just being honest, but he also should not really listen to what pple say about u.
note that if things continue this way, ur guy may be patronising other slim ladies.
just continue to pray for him and u both have the fear of GOD than he will so much
appreciate you for who u are.
please be happy and do you part.

@Michelin89 & Funkebaby,

ur kinda right.
Am fat in the wrong place.
my tommy refused to go down.

I think you have the sizes mixed up:



Clothing - Single Size Conversion
UK 4 6 8 10 12 14 16 18 20 22 24 26

US 1 2 4 6 8 10 12 14 16 18 20 22

so what do you gonna do?
sorry to say, but the guy doesn't love u at all
so be careful

Bonita:

I think you have the sizes mixed up:



Clothing - Single Size Conversion
UK 4 6 8 10 12 14 16 18 20 22 24 26

US 1 2 4 6 8 10 12 14 16 18 20 22

So a size 10 in the US is a size 14 in the UK? uhmmmm

fantababy:

@Michelin89 & Funkebaby,

your kinda right.
Am fat in the wrong place.
my tommy refused to go down.

Don't worry!some men will still appreciate u. . .nor b 2day!

I didn't read all comments so pardon me if what I'm about to say has already been said

@ Poster
you guys fell in love without seeing each other? hmmm
he proposed to you within 3 months? hmmm
you live in Canada and he lives in Abuja? hmmm how are you sure he's not using you for papers to travel abroad?

Sweetie, the man is already making you feel inferior and bad about yourself, if you two get married it will only get worst! don't forget motherhood takes a toll on women's weight so, you will only get fatter and he will have more reasons to verbally abuse you.
You need a man that will love you inside and out, a man that will understand your weight issues and be supportive while you're struggling to loose weight. You don't need a man that will constantly remind you how fat you are!

^^yes o! she needs a real chubby lover.

honeric01:

So a size 10 in the US is a size 14 in the UK? uhmmmm

Yup!

women and their antics again blame men for everything how can he make you lose confidence and become depressed if you are feeling that you probably didnt feel good about your weight in the first place but as they say the truth hurts instead of whining and complaining better go hit the gym or join the the biggest loser cos u surely sound like one

lose weight abeg. poor dude is probably gauging what she would look like after a kid or two.

davidylan:

lose weight abeg. poor dude is probably gauging what she would look like after a kid or two.

You too talk.

michelin89:

You too talk.

too much.
*just helpin oh*

Bonita:

Yup!

uhm ok.

IgboGirl:

I didn't read all comments so pardon me if what I'm about to say has already been said

@ Poster
you guys fell in love without seeing each other? hmmm
he proposed to you within 3 months? hmmm
you live in Canada and he lives in Abuja? hmmm how are you sure he's not using you for papers to travel abroad?

Sweetie, the man is already making you feel inferior and bad about yourself, if you two get married it will only get worst! don't forget motherhood takes a toll on women's weight so, you will only get fatter and he will have more reasons to verbally abuse you.
You need a man that will love you inside and out, a man that will understand your weight issues and be supportive while you're struggling to loose weight. You don't need a man that will constantly remind you how fat you are!

if he was using her for papers to travel abroad will he be worried about her weight ? dude sounds like he is established in abuja and wants a fine woman to complement him. i dont think he is a broke azz who has to run abroad to eat. if he was a brokeazz, the issue of weight will only crop up after he has recieved canadian citizenship

First thing first, how can size 12 be called fat   be realistic people jare. Toccara Jones is that size, most Nigeria man I know want that kind of proportion not just a bag of bones.  Jennifer Hudson was even bigger than you before she decided to slim down and I personally think she looked better big bodied

The guy is just nit-picking dear, you were even bigger when you first met him so where is he getting his ideas from?
You are "settling" for him, as he is not up to par by your standards
He allows his friends to disrespect you. Most sensible people even the ones on this thread would not even let their own mother say anything mean about their girlfriends not to talk about mere friends to fiancee
All this is your fault I am sorry.

Fantababy you're chubby honey, I'vetold you we can't all be models, or look like stars and so on , the only thing I advise you it's if you're very overweight cause as I mentioned I can not really have a vision or what's your size since it's english mensurations but try to take care of your health, but don't listen to mad criticism. Imperfection is what you makes you unique dear think about it.

fantababy:

@Michelin89 & Funkebaby,

your kinda right.
Am fat in the wrong place. 
my tommy refused to go down.

okay. and when he complained about your tummy, what was your immediate response to him?

you said his friends said you look older than him. do you take good care of yourself? dress your size?

good hairdo, not too much makeup? cos i do not see how a big tummy can affect your face and make you appear older than him?

fantababy:

Physically, he did not meet my expectation at all, but as a christian, I said[b] looks does not matter[/b], it is the heart that matters.

fantababy, be honest.
is this dude ugly?

its the ugly dudes ( short, with bowleg, etc) that pick on such little things. they are ugly but classy, yet they want a super model by their side to flaunt to all their friends and complement their 'swag' as if that will make any difference to their looks 

Read the entire thread with interest. . .

1.) Fantababy, you guys hardly know each other enough to get married. He proposed without having seen you face to face? And you accepted?
Frankly I think both of una dey desperate.

2.) Trust me, that guy doesn't love you. Not because he criticized you about your weight based on his friends' comments, but because he failed to defend you when his friends uttered those comments. I would expect a guy that is in love with his fiancee to say something like "Thanks for your opinion guys, but she's my baby. .and I love her that way" (on the other hand, he can't even say that as he's not comfortable with your weight/shape in the first place).

3.) I understand the tummy-refusing-to-go-down thingy. That is the number one turn-off for me. If you're 5'4", 69/70 kg, you aint that bad (plus u've got yourself a pretty face ). .but with the tummy?

u just hit the nail on the head~