MJBOLT:

what do you want us to do

I think you need Tinubu's kind of glass to enable you read well...

I feel this issue should be fixed between you and your woman alone, without involving a third party. If you continue to involve a third party in your business all the time, be prepared to have various family meetings over little issue, which to me isn't cool for a long lasting relationship or marriage. If you're not cool with the way she dress, I'd suggest you try talking to her about it again, take her out for little shopping (make sure you go with her), recommend for her a couple of nice responsible outfits, and then from the store u guys should head to a cool restaurant eat something lite. With this, you've been able to talk to her in a loving way and not by fighting her or reporting her to her parents.

PrimadonnaO:
All the people saying there's someone else out there she's dressing up for, what's your problem?

It's not everyone who dresses for someone else. Some of us dress up for our very own selves.

Now to the OP. First, of all, is this lady your wife or baby mama? You must know that you can't push an adult around. You can't scream down their heads in the name of telling them what to do... most often, such actions are counter-productive. You'd bring out a rebellious side in her. Saying it once, truly is enough... a few times is passable...but anything beyond that becomes downright over bearing.

As you said, she never used to dress like that before. Certain things, consciously or unconsciously are influencing this change. She's going through a phase... I was there at a time, too... if the dress is not above knee-length I won't wear it, even to the office... Lol. But I honestly wasn't doing it for anyone...I felt cool with myself. I didn't know the Holy Spirit had departed from me. It was just a transient mood, anyway. What your fair lady needs is loving admonishment, like an adult...not calling family meeting on her case! Haba! I'm sure the short things you're referring to are not overtly short. Check...perhaps her spiritual life is dwindling... perhaps she's trying to be more fashionable and she thinks skimpy is the way to go...

You've already registered that you don't appreciate the new style... let her be... she'll get tired and come around to being the girl she used to be.

kpakam real talk.

Bros u have not made it clear to us if u are married to her or is she ur baby mama pls b specific OK let know how to advice u because dis na serious matter tenx

She was a ho before she met you she change am quick for you just to cuff you into marriage or pregnancy now that she’s got you her true identity is seeping through,I bet you her mother knows that’s why she dey form I don’t send,I don’t send.

Op, having gone through your post and also some comments herein, I can only deduce that most ladies or those not married here have expressed their own view over your post because of who they are. Some good and some bad.

No responsible woman would wanna start showing of negative behavior against your own wish having not shown those attitude at the early stage of your relationship.

Two things are involved here. Either she is having affairs outside, to impress someone out there, or she has a very close bad friend that is misleading her. Check her friends that are very close to her to know where the fault is coming from. Something is definitely wrong and if her mother doesn't resolve the issue and she is not willing to change, take a walk. I advise you not to go back to look for her in order to resolve the issue since you have done that before and it never worked. If you keep going after her, the family will see you as a weak person and the lady can take advantage of that and be messing around.

NwanyiAwkaetiti:
I'll advice u to involve the pastor and her family members. Use scissors to cut up the clothes.

run from dis advice if u try it i can bet u ur wife, girlfriend or baby mama is gone and u will bring out the beast in her

DMerciful:
Why are you supporting a bad thing? So you will disrespect your husband because you want to please other men literally? Or what does a married woman get from advertisement?
Op, there are many women looking for husband, look for one who will respect you!

she just said bitter truth. I'm a man but the guy messed up using that word "ashamed". You don't tell someone you claim to love such word.

Souqwaqif:
I Want The Best For Her But She Seems Not To Understand, Pls Advice Needed

Dear All, good evening.

When I first met my woman, I met her decently dressed, since she is from a Christian background, likewise my very self.

But as time goes on I discovered she puts on dresses that are either too tight or too short. I have corrected her in love several times and even reported to her parents, she adjusted for a while and continued again.

She even promised to stop such dresses because of our baby girl.

This time around she put on a very short gown that makes her look like a prostitute on her WhatsApp profile.

On seeing it, I replied that I am ashamed and disappointed in her and as a result I refuse giving her the money she demanded.

She knows why I was angry and why i made such comment and instead of her to apologize she told her mother that I said I was ashamed and disappointed in her, her mother called me to ask me why I said such, I explained to her that its because I have been correcting her on her dressing but this one was too bad, she said OK and that's all.

Its over 5 days now I have not heard any thing from her and her mum. So I just kept silent too because the last that happened I was the one that called for a meeting with her parents to sort it out.

This time around I may not do such again.

However, if there is a better way you can advise me on this I will appreciate. Since her dad may not be in the know.

Thanks

the lady need to acknowledge the fact that she is a christian as well as a wife there fore subjecting herself selflessly to the husband not because he is superior to her but to prove to her parents she is mentally ready to start a family of her own.
To the gentleman do not involve third parties in ur marital issues, accept the new lifestyle of ur wife show to her you married her because you love her unconditionally even if she's not dressed according to standard & taste.

Souqwaqif:
I Want The Best For Her But She Seems Not To Understand, Pls Advice Needed

Dear All, good evening.

When I first met my woman, I met her decently dressed, since she is from a Christian background, likewise my very self.

But as time goes on I discovered she puts on dresses that are either too tight or too short. I have corrected her in love several times and even reported to her parents, she adjusted for a while and continued again.

She even promised to stop such dresses because of our baby girl.

This time around she put on a very short gown that makes her look like a prostitute on her WhatsApp profile.

On seeing it, I replied that I am ashamed and disappointed in her and as a result I refuse giving her the money she demanded.

She knows why I was angry and why i made such comment and instead of her to apologize she told her mother that I said I was ashamed and disappointed in her, her mother called me to ask me why I said such, I explained to her that its because I have been correcting her on her dressing but this one was too bad, she said OK and that's all.

Its over 5 days now I have not heard any thing from her and her mum. So I just kept silent too because the last that happened I was the one that called for a meeting with her parents to sort it out.

This time around I may not do such again.

However, if there is a better way you can advise me on this I will appreciate. Since her dad may not be in the know.

Thanks

Kindly report her to your pastor,he knows what to do

Probably you have not been appreciating her enough and she decided to do this.. Men like you protect your women , but do appreciate it when other women dressed in such way. Or is it that your woman is such massive behind which you don't want others have some feeling for...say the truth,pls appreciate her and gently she listened to you...

Your woman is cheating on you or about to start cheating on you. To prove this to you, check her phone and you will see that it's passworded

If this is her only flaw, guy you have no problems at all. She may want some admiration from you, yet you are ashamed, its heartbreaking. Even if you marry her,you shouldn't push her around. Love her into submission

run to God

badadvice:
Personally, i'd rather and even demand my woman dress slutty when we're alone in the house.
Short gown, bum short, panties and bra or just panties without a bra etc ish.
But since op doesnt like that, i'll advise he dumps/divorces the lady.
A lady who doesnt dress the way her husbands demands deserves to be dumped/divorced regardless of how kind, loving, faithful, respectful, etc she is.

I read your comment, and I want to reply you. Then I saw your moniker, that's when I laugh.

Lordsview:
Kindly report her to your pastor,he knows what to do

see mumu talk

OP, I will blame this on you. You fell for outer look before you married her. That is why I never wooed a lady in church before I got married because I knew I was fake then mean spiritually though a quite type. Wide girls are more in churches if u no shine your eye u might be a victim.

The first thing I look before I got married was the circle of my wife mean people she calls friend I discovered she is not a friend type like me.

3 things might be the cause of her sudden change:

1. Her spiritual life is sharking, yours has long time ago because you should have seeing this coming if not.

2. Being influenced by friends, which you need to work on asap before it gets to late.

3. You don't appreciate her when she put on that ones you cherish now an outsider is cherishing her new look better...

Solution:

1. Pray, pray and pray.

2. Fill that vacuum. Be her closest friend, talk n joke like baby with her...

3. Appreciate her more... Even when her dressing isn't that OK not indecent dress o, mean when she dresses good but not 100% as u like her to look; this will give her confidence when she steps out and no one can influence her with their own dress

4. Lastly, be a man! Stand on your words you own her, mean all of her if you guys have married legally and always correct her in love though, you may apply force at times too but if is not working take it slowly.

vingeophysicist:
So because of her dress code you want to end your relationship. My dear I even love this kind of lady's because there change in there dressing gives you signal to investigate her. Op I advice you to be vigilant but don't complain about it again so as to make her think you are not watching her. I'm certain something fishy is going on because of her change in dressing.

Well spoken.... A lady was cheating on me for two years. I kept watching, silently. I never, ever confronted her. I didn't stop talking with the man involved. I quietly ended the relationship without explaining to her. Years later, we met and she brought up the topic, na there she know say na fox I be. Girls young enough to be her daughters are getting married, she is still single. A friend of hers was leading her own.....whenever you are facing challenges in your relationship, become still, watch, then act. Don't whine....one reason I keep calm can be seen here; ladies will turn it to gender war instead of helping, they will confuse you, the ones talking here won't tolerate if their brothers were involved. They are desperately wicked and selfish. My ex friends stopped talking to me until they realized that I knew what they were up to all along. End the relationship, if you are having trust issues.

Katier00:
Op make I kukuma follow ask, is that all? You need to grow up. Is she disrespecting you? Is she wasteful or lazy or is she cheating on you or neglecting her duties as a mother and wife? Why are you creating problem were there is none. How short is the gown sef. How can you tell a woman you love that you are ashamed of her? I don't know for you ooo but my late father would say, as you makee your bed so you lie on it. No use your hand destroy the beautiful thing you have

You are bn biased with this your post, can't she correct her wife again or you're justifying the skimpy dress his wife wore.

greatnaija01:
In the JOURNEY OF LOVE.... TAKE YOUR BRAIN ALONG.

She is dressing for someone else.... who is richer or better than you in HER EYES.

SHE IS NOT READY TO BE A WIFE.

following your own BIBLE... she is NOT a WIFE.

check CHARACTER before you go and deceive yourself at the ALTAR and Alter your destiny.

LET HER GO SLOWLY and run for your life.

She won't change even after marriage. She loves the attention she gets when she dresses that way and the money she also gets.... OOPS or maybe the sex she is getting... or she hopes to get which you are TOO GODLY to give her.

go and improve yourself financially and socially... till she is too LOW for you then she will be able to obey every command of yours. THAT'S HOW LIFE WORKS....

REMEMBER.......... NICE GUYS ALWAYS FINISH LAST.

OP, this is the best advice for you so far

I think you should start by talking to her as much as you can on this. Get to understand her taste and why, let her know your specific concerns.
I am sure if you do you will rather be proud of her. However if the dressing is rather offensive or degrading that may be a concern., but if it's just fashion get her to understand the times such dresses are appropriate.
I would advise you desist from taking your matters before her parents or yours or anyone at all over dressing, food, money etc. I don't know if you two are married but I see a child between you two.. Practice love, trust and understanding.

PrimadonnaO:
All the people saying there's someone else out there she's dressing up for, what's your problem?

It's not everyone who dresses for someone else. Some of us dress up for our very own selves.

Now to the OP. First, of all, is this lady your wife or baby mama? You must know that you can't push an adult around. You can't scream down their heads in the name of telling them what to do... most often, such actions are counter-productive. You'd bring out a rebellious side in her. Saying it once, truly is enough... a few times is passable...but anything beyond that becomes downright over bearing.

As you said, she never used to dress like that before. Certain things, consciously or unconsciously are influencing this change. She's going through a phase... I was there at a time, too... if the dress is not above knee-length I won't wear it, even to the office... Lol. But I honestly wasn't doing it for anyone...I felt cool with myself. I didn't know the Holy Spirit had departed from me. It was just a transient mood, anyway. What your fair lady needs is loving admonishment, like an adult...not calling family meeting on her case! Haba! I'm sure the short things you're referring to are not overtly short. Check...perhaps her spiritual life is dwindling... perhaps she's trying to be more fashionable and she thinks skimpy is the way to go...

You've already registered that you don't appreciate the new style... let her be... she'll get tired and come around to being the girl she used to be.

WAOH....

Souqwaqif:
I Want The Best For Her But She Seems Not To Understand, Pls Advice Needed

Dear All, good evening.

When I first met my woman, I met her decently dressed, since she is from a Christian background, likewise my very self.

But as time goes on I discovered she puts on dresses that are either too tight or too short. I have corrected her in love several times and even reported to her parents, she adjusted for a while and continued again.

She even promised to stop such dresses because of our baby girl.

This time around she put on a very short gown that makes her look like a prostitute on her WhatsApp profile.

On seeing it, I replied that I am ashamed and disappointed in her and as a result I refuse giving her the money she demanded.

She knows why I was angry and why i made such comment and instead of her to apologize she told her mother that I said I was ashamed and disappointed in her, her mother called me to ask me why I said such, I explained to her that its because I have been correcting her on her dressing but this one was too bad, she said OK and that's all.

Its over 5 days now I have not heard any thing from her and her mum. So I just kept silent too because the last that happened I was the one that called for a meeting with her parents to sort it out.

This time around I may not do such again.

However, if there is a better way you can advise me on this I will appreciate. Since her dad may not be in the know.

Thanks

Some of you guys marry before you are truly ready to be a husband.

Your wife belongs to you in life and in death, in wellness and in sickness. She is to obey you and follow your ways. She will like what you like and whatever you don't like she will not like it.

Your in-laws are not there to play the role of husband over your wife. Why are you reporting her to them over such minor thing as style of dressing? Whats wrong with you? You belittled your manhood in front of your in-law.

If your wife rebels against you take away her liberties. If she fails to correct, she is not good for you, separate yourself from her. You are a man, your dick does not have her name stamped on it, give it to the woman that bow humbly and follow your lead. Be a man!

Souqwaqif:
Thank you all for both destructive and constructive opinions and counsels.Through your advise I have been able to discuss with her dad,and discovered he was already aware,but kept mute till I called him this afternoon and he was very happy that I reported the matter to him,he assured me he will caution her daughter but advised me not to use such demeaning words"disappointed and ashamed of her daughter " due to her poor dressing.Tho I apologized to him(father).But I still insist that I was angry because she has to do the needful or live her life with whomever is making her dress in such manner even after I bought good cloths for her.Although the dad told me he spent some money on her all these while I have been mute and will still remain mute until the needful is done,I immediately refunded the money back to him.I really appreciate all your good counsels and insults from the small minds but only God knows my heart that I won't like my woman to dress like a harlot and if she is not ready to apologize and change to be a good model to our daughter then two captains can not be in a ship.Thanks

You are so rude. Very, very rude. What type of woman marry this kind of man? I pity your wife. You are not the captain, neither is she. You should live together as a team, build your home and stop this religious freaky mindset of yours.

Souqwaqif:
I Want The Best For Her But She Seems Not To Understand, Pls Advice Needed

Dear All, good evening.

When I first met my woman, I met her decently dressed, since she is from a Christian background, likewise my very self.

But as time goes on I discovered she puts on dresses that are either too tight or too short. I have corrected her in love several times and even reported to her parents, she adjusted for a while and continued again.

She even promised to stop such dresses because of our baby girl.

This time around she put on a very short gown that makes her look like a prostitute on her WhatsApp profile.

On seeing it, I replied that I am ashamed and disappointed in her and as a result I refuse giving her the money she demanded.

She knows why I was angry and why i made such comment and instead of her to apologize she told her mother that I said I was ashamed and disappointed in her, her mother called me to ask me why I said such, I explained to her that its because I have been correcting her on her dressing but this one was too bad, she said OK and that's all.

Its over 5 days now I have not heard any thing from her and her mum. So I just kept silent too because the last that happened I was the one that called for a meeting with her parents to sort it out.

This time around I may not do such again.

However, if there is a better way you can advise me on this I will appreciate. Since her dad may not be in the know.

Thanks

DON'T EVEN MAKE THAT MISTAKE OF CALLING her or her mom in order to settle, IGNORE THEM BOTH, This is d easiest way to get the best outcome,

Trust me, since you already reached out the first time, Ignore them this time around, DO NOT SHOW THEM HOW DESPERATE YOU ARE

Souqwaqif:
I Want The Best For Her But She Seems Not To Understand, Pls Advice Needed

Dear All, good evening.

When I first met my woman, I met her decently dressed, since she is from a Christian background, likewise my very self.

But as time goes on I discovered she puts on dresses that are either too tight or too short. I have corrected her in love several times and even reported to her parents, she adjusted for a while and continued again.

She even promised to stop such dresses because of our baby girl.

This time around she put on a very short gown that makes her look like a prostitute on her WhatsApp profile.

On seeing it, I replied that I am ashamed and disappointed in her and as a result I refuse giving her the money she demanded.

She knows why I was angry and why i made such comment and instead of her to apologize she told her mother that I said I was ashamed and disappointed in her, her mother called me to ask me why I said such, I explained to her that its because I have been correcting her on her dressing but this one was too bad, she said OK and that's all.

Its over 5 days now I have not heard any thing from her and her mum. So I just kept silent too because the last that happened I was the one that called for a meeting with her parents to sort it out.

This time around I may not do such again.

However, if there is a better way you can advise me on this I will appreciate. Since her dad may not be in the know.

Thanks

Didn't you observe this trait in your wife before you married her? You can't teach a old dog new tricks

Perhaps the best you can do is to buy her lovely clothes but are more conservative. See it as an investment and not an expenditure! Even if it is new and even branded, buy it! Something she would like to showoff in

Alternatively you too can dress down like her and maybe get a few girls around to comment about you in front of her and close to hearing, she may understand gradually the dangers of flirty dressing. She may understand or alternatively break your head!

Souqwaqif:
I Want The Best For Her But She Seems Not To Understand, Pls Advice Needed

Dear All, good evening.

When I first met my woman, I met her decently dressed, since she is from a Christian background, likewise my very self.

But as time goes on I discovered she puts on dresses that are either too tight or too short. I have corrected her in love several times and even reported to her parents, she adjusted for a while and continued again.

She even promised to stop such dresses because of our baby girl.

This time around she put on a very short gown that makes her look like a prostitute on her WhatsApp profile.

On seeing it, I replied that I am ashamed and disappointed in her and as a result I refuse giving her the money she demanded.

She knows why I was angry and why i made such comment and instead of her to apologize she told her mother that I said I was ashamed and disappointed in her, her mother called me to ask me why I said such, I explained to her that its because I have been correcting her on her dressing but this one was too bad, she said OK and that's all.

Its over 5 days now I have not heard any thing from her and her mum. So I just kept silent too because the last that happened I was the one that called for a meeting with her parents to sort it out.

This time around I may not do such again.

However, if there is a better way you can advise me on this I will appreciate. Since her dad may not be in the know.

Thanks

Dear, this was the family you thought they are Christian s oh, well the lord is your strength

She needs Christ.

Oga you are just jealous.go and marry her

Empressabbie:

You are so rude. Very, very rude. What type of woman marry this kind of man? I pity your wife. You are not the captain, neither is she. You should live together as a team, build your home and stop this religious freaky mindset of yours.

I don't understand you, can't somebody tell his wife to dress in Godly way