xendra:
go and rest! las las na so e suppose to be, no be me do am like that. even though I get I go still chop my husband own.

and your husband no go chop your own abi?

seuncyrus:


Most Nigerians believe the only way out of poverty is to get married into a rich home ....very sad

True.

what if she has been married the first time and it was suffer head that made her quit the marriage. Why are people seeing it as she doesn't want to suffer the second time because she is from a poor background. what she means by second time is what you should be interested in

I think she means there’s more to being with someone than just money

Money will not send you texts or leave breakfast for you but a loving partner will. There is emotional well being and bonding that comes as added support in this tough world that people often ignore until it’s too late

You have to think of now as it’s a sure glimpse of what is to come if certain things are not worked on now.

I know I’m a little hot headed when angry so I know to avoid situations that will cause anger

May be lack of affection or even ignorance that can lead to suffering.

Ebonygirl1:
One of the reasons I dislike some Nigerians. Couples be hiding shitt from each other. If he's having a steady income, isn't he supposed to tell her since he sees himself spending his life with her? Its one of the things that increases his chances of marrying her.

The Mentality of most Nigerian girls make guys put things on code from them.
Just like an average lady wants to be sure that a guy loves her genuinely and not after her body, that's how it goes for the Guys.

I won't code for a Rich girl but as for Ajekpako I'll put on my code. Hunger and love for money can Trigger love.

bukatyne:


Her parents are/were poor, she wants to marry a richer man.

Now the question is apart from looking for a richer mate, what is she doing to climb out of poverty?

Apart from money, what else is she looking for in a man?

Does she love her current boyfriend and wishes he makes more money (hence the non-readiness of marriage) or is she using him to cure her kongi till the rich man comes along?

You sorry your friend needs to find the true answers to these questions before he opens up on his finances to the girl.

He doesn't need a fair weather wife on the journey of marriage.

Didn't you read how she tried helping him?

solasoulmusic:
I think she means there’s more to being with someone that just money there is emotional well being and support that people often ignore until it’s too late

You have to think of now as it’s a sure glimpse of what is to come if certain things are not worked on now.

I know I’m a little hot headed when angry so I know to avoid situations that will cause anger

May be lack of affection or even ignorance that can lead to suffering

This is the very first sensible post on this thread coming from a female.

The rest are spewing thrash as usual.

Even me as a man, I ain't ready for another suffering bout

Well..I'm having the same issue in my relationship and I'm weighing my options first.. looking so far at what she has offered ... looking at the good sides and bad sides of her.. checking to see if I can manage her person..but then I realized she is the type who believes in doing what's best for her..which is selfish in a way..but still that's life.. there's no love anywhere..what women look out for most is what are you bringing..they don't ask themselves "what would I be adding to him"..though I may my conclusion a while back that I am gonna do what's best for me too..though we haven't broken up..but she made a statement like the above..I pressured her to clarify on it..she made it seem like.."don't give yourself headache on what i said or don't take my words out of context...heaven knows I'll support my woman in every way..but I'd never be with someone passing time with me till she finds better option.

As per the post..confirm from her what she means in clearer terms...then make your conclusion...tell your friend not to worry about losing the geh...there would come another geh and anoda geh and anoda geh and anoda geh.. he'll meet so many other..we just like to tell ourselves" oh that geh is so amazing..I doubt I would meet any other geh like her"..dat one nah scam bro.. you'll be fine laslas..and lastly..luv is not love in our clime here in 9ja.. everyone is just doing what's best for them..leave her now..face your life..work harder..so you too can set standards for the women you wanna share your dough with..Jah bless

Ebonygirl1:
One of the reasons I dislike some Nigerians. Couples be hiding shitt from each other. If he's having a steady income, isn't he supposed to tell her since he sees himself spending his life with her? Its one of the things that increases his chances of marrying her.

Increase his chances of marrying her? Like she’s what? Miss World or what?

See woman thought process o

Mart1994:


This is the very first sensible post on this thread coming from a female.

The rest are spewing thrash as usual.

experience is always the best teacher bro blessings thanks

Apeshy101:
"I'm Not Ready To Suffer A Second Time" What Does it Mean When A Lady Says This?

My friend has been down since yesterday.

He was talking over the phone with his girlfriend friend, in the course of the discussion, he chipped in marriage to the girl.

The girl stylishly told him "she was not ready to suffer a second time".

They both laughed over it then.

Both the guy and babe are from poor backgrounds but the guy is gradually hitting it steadily recently (though he has kept this from the girl)

I don't even know put this to the guy as he seams hurt by the statement.

Me: "It's nothing, just a way to "ginger" you to hustle or you want make she come your house come suffer"?

Guy is seeing things from a different angle.

My guy, my friend, my sister, ..... we all know it’s you

op na you be the guy.

Lol, all of you insulting me, Una go dey alright o. I just said the plain truth, if you like, don't listen. Your anger won't change the truth.

Chi59:

Didn't you read how she tried helping him?

Did you read the post you quoted?

He should dump the gal asap..besides our women don't know that rich men marry rich women or women from rich homes and that's why many women are single..nobody wants a total liability as a wife

Dottore:

Why can't she work hard and get rich herself or are women exempted from being rich?

if she does that, then she doesn't need a man. there's no reason to marry a poor man who will only complicate her life with his entitlement mentality

Harddiskng:


Your guy has good instincts, you’d better advise him to let this one go and get himself someone that is ready to build with him.

Instead of a girl that is looking to reap where she or her family members did not sow. There are alot of great men that had next to nothing when they married their wives.

You made the most sense on this thread from a realistic point of view.

And as well, there are men who had so much when they first married their wives only for them due to unforeseen shortcomings in life have nothing in a long run and at that point what will she do?

Marriage must be seen beyond substance to essence. How many women complain of unhappiness, lack of attention, and e.t.c after being married to some rich men.

For the record, the richest black African Aliko Dangote had to let go of one of his young wives because she kept complaining that he has no time for her always busy, hence what is the essence of their being married. They ended divorced. Just an example.

Husband na proverty alivation program abi,if you where born poor,you work your way out of poverty.that guy needs to run,that woman would only drain him.what can not add to you must surely take from you.

SBL28:
The girl is just being truthful. She grew up poor and she wants to have a better life. Can't be drinking garri at home and still continue in her husband's house. We are praying for progress not stagnation.

I read some very good comments

Ariza:
Oh well, in this part of the world, a woman is expected to "suffer" with her man as a proof of love.

Welcome bacckkkk

loswhite:
Who is responsible for her poverty? Is relationship poverty alleviation? It is up to her to work hard and not expect that marriage will take her away from poverty.

Nigerian women keep talking as if the female gender is a disability.
Tufia

dokyOloye:

Nigerian women keep talking as if the female gender is a disability.
Tufia

Would u want your sister/daughter to start with a stranger of a man from POVERTY level or at least average level?

sharone21:

Would u want your sister/daughter to start with a stranger of a man from POVERTY level or at least average level?

My 1st sister had her PhD from my father's house @ 27,now married and lives with the husband in the US,has been working fir the past 3 yrs,almost thru with her nursing degree and she's 30 this year.
My 2nd sister is 26,has her masters and ICAN and has been lecturing in a fed poly for 2yrs now.
So,if she sees anybody she really likes,his finances would be d least of my problems cos she can comfortably take car of partner.
I repeat, d female gender is not a disability.

@Apeshy101
She wants to marry a man of improved financial background.

dokyOloye:

My 1st sister had her PhD from my father's house @ 27,now married and lives with the husband in the US,has been working fir the past 3 yrs,almost thru with her nursing degree and she's 30 this year.
My 2nd sister is 26,has her masters and ICAN and has been lecturing in a fed poly for 2yrs now.
So,if she sees anybody she really likes,his finances would be d least of my problems cos she can comfortably take car of partner.
I repeat, d female gender is not a disability.

Sure, and your dad/parents played roles that will not make them disabilities to anybody, but is it so for many ladies apart from those who struggle to achieve with/out certificates?
You think a lady will go through all this academic stress and marry ANYBODY? Na, she go chook eye well for water and marry an average person( least) who appreciates her. How many ladies who struggled with their POOR men from scratch enjoyed them when the men 'arrived'?
See, as the NECK and SUPPORTER to men, women choose who they want to support, no woman wants a liability too of a man. Imagine ALL the stress women go through in marriage. Have u ever seen a man because he LOVES a woman, help her carry children for 9months+ risking his life because of her( even when women help the men financially, with financial back ups)? Some men sef no even fit 'bail' their wives from hospital after delivery because of no/limited cash, some women even bleed to death because of this poor state when they need urgent nedical attention when pregnant. The highest men will do is to help the ladies get surrogate mothers, but the majority of Nigerian men will prefer marrying a 2nd wife or having a concubine outside of his home. So, this is usually the fate of women since they risk their lives and all to be with a stranger of a man to create a family in the name of marriage?
As a lady said on this thread, 'las, las na woman go still eat man money it is the BITTER truth, deal with it....one cannot put her life down and not get it back 'financially' not with the stress ladies go through in the name of marriage especially in Africa.

izzou:


Welcome bacckkkk

Why the face? common smile joor

Ariza:


Why the face? common smile joor

Dont deactivate again oh

izzou:




Dont deactivate again oh

I will try not to.
But I'm having this urge to resurrect 'Ruth Daniels' if I do, this will have to go.

Still thinking sha.

Ariza:
I will try not to.
But I'm having this urge to resurrect 'Ruth Daniels' if I do, this will have to go.

Still thinking sha.

izzou:

Okay, I won't. .I will just fit her into this . How have you been?