stanisbaratheon:
Nature is not fair at all on the male folks.


A guy can date a lady and spend on her on a regular without complaining even for a day.

Most of these girls are fvckn stingy...I mean self-centred.

kazeeyoung:


For him to travel as far as that to check on u, that means he loves you. He may not know that what he is doing is actually wrong because he is use to it and nobody has correct Him based on that act.
Telling him you can’t continue with his attitude, then see may be he will change..

OP
This is a sensible advice to take if you really like him and want things to turn around and work out for good.

OrestesDante:





∆


That's a real OG. The real hackagon.

Na sense and overwisdom go kill that guy.

In case of separation, no one get used. So it is a win-win situation from the scratch. No one loses.
I hope your back never dey ground.

∆

both her back and her nyach don touch ground proper proper.

omooba969:


Most of these girls are fvckn stingy...I mean self-centred.

Oh what a wicked world my brother.

Hmmmmm LAMBA . How many girls have you married within 3 months since you’ve been asking babes out on here ? Bros no one is marrying anyone we are all assholes . Our girl friends or wife to be are somewhere doing their masters . Let’s keep telling this girls the real truth that we just wanna get under dia pants ,I can’t marry anyone online , we can only Bleep and get the best of ourselves

yommen:


Oga, of you are truly the guy she is talking about, you fumble big time. Which kind test be that? She spends for you and she is faithful to you and you've been bleeping her but your questionable character is creating doubts in her mind and here you saying you've been testing her. I haven't really been so lucky with girls but if I come across her, I'll marry her in less than 3 months.

Arsenate:

Bro, no disrespect, but you are dating Funmistiqueen which means you have an extremely poor taste in women and hence you are in no position to call another man half a man.

Just take several seats and stfu.

. You are not sound enough to know what my girl stand for.Dear of all the beauty queen I have ever dated, I will choose Funmisticqueen a million times. Then again I like you to post picture of your girl, Bring her to discussion here on nairaland, let see how beautiful and high value your woman is. We will gladly introduce any topic of discussion then let see her inputs. Let Nairalandler be the judge. If you can't take this challenge then know you are a dog and you are not fit to Grace the ground my girl walk.

omooba969:


@bolded,

I hope all men can have this sense of entitlement as well...

My dear anyhow you see it, for me I have come to realize this BITTER TRUTH..

mharyamikeola92:
Pls help me move this to front page.

I am a working class lady and I hardly demand things from whosoever I love.

There is this guy that I ave been dating for years now. I don’t know what to call his behavior, whether it is stinginess or the other way round.

I noticed that whenever he comes visiting, he doesn’t bring anything and I get to cook and takecare of him. I was forced to talk 1 day.

The last time he came visiting, he brought bread and other stuffs along which he ended up eating all by himself. I decided not to cook or do anything but I couldn't take it so we went out to buy stuffs. I needed to use POS and I forgot my phone at home. So I begged him to transfer 5k to the lady and that I was going to transfer back to him when we get home. We ended up using the money to get chicken, pepper and other stuffs.

On getting home I demanded for his account details in order to transfer the money back and to my surprise, he gave me and I transferred the money.

My major concern is that this guy has never given me common N10 and he is working. I don’t know if he's worth settling down with cos I fear for my future. Will he be able to give if he has more? This is the guy that is already telling me to come meet his mum cos she wants to see me.

Pls no insults, just advice.

Babe, run for your dear life. That's a good digger there. You'll curse the day you met him if you mistakenly settle for such a guy. They don't give and they are always all out to milk you dry. He'll get worse after marriage and you may need to play the financial role of both parents to your children. The part that'll pain you the most is when your mum comes for omugwo and he fails to see the need to appreciate the innocent woman who left her all to do omugwo.

Run from any man that hardly give to people. Run ooooo coz its better imagined than experienced.

cr7lomo:


So what is paining u now?? Anyway, truth hurts... Nigerian women are the most stingy women in planet earth... But still u can't point out anything valuable they do with their money ... The only time they believe u love them is when u spend on them ...what sort of ret.artded mentality is that... It's a different case if she is in need and has no income ... bleeped up creatures

Odiegwu. Na people wey no know una dey follow una mouth. Naija guy dey love? Toor!

Even if you have a well paying job he needs to be giving you monthly income to take care of your needs and he should at least buy you some wears or shoes when coming it's the responsibility of a man to do this things i love and respect a guy that spend on me and pamper me.......The truth is....i can never take a guy who don't spend on me serious and I'll block his every access to me.......I'm just saying my mind

mharyamikeola92:
Pls help me move this to front page.

I am a working class lady and I hardly demand things from whosoever I love.

There is this guy that I ave been dating for years now. I don’t know what to call his behavior, whether it is stinginess or the other way round.

I noticed that whenever he comes visiting, he doesn’t bring anything and I get to cook and takecare of him. I was forced to talk 1 day.

The last time he came visiting, he brought bread and other stuffs along which he ended up eating all by himself. I decided not to cook or do anything but I couldn't take it so we went out to buy stuffs. I needed to use POS and I forgot my phone at home. So I begged him to transfer 5k to the lady and that I was going to transfer back to him when we get home. We ended up using the money to get chicken, pepper and other stuffs.

On getting home I demanded for his account details in order to transfer the money back and to my surprise, he gave me and I transferred the money.

My major concern is that this guy has never given me common N10 and he is working. I don’t know if he's worth settling down with cos I fear for my future. Will he be able to give if he has more? This is the guy that is already telling me to come meet his mum cos she wants to see me.

Pls no insults, just advice.

I saw the topic and i was ready to attack u, when i read the part that u said u are working, i wanted to tear u apart, naturally, I hate girls laying claim to their guy's money when they can afford theirs. However, after reading all the story, i realized, if truly wat u said is true, den u dating one selfish son of a bitch and u should run. A man that cannot take care of his lady when he can afford it is a bitch ass man. My advice to u is to run, if he is not taking care of you now that he is trying hard to win ur love and affection, he wont bother to do it when yall are married. My dear, japa

omooba969:


Most of these girls are fvckn stingy...I mean self-centred.

They think the world owe them.

Humility017:


being responsible comes in variant forms...

there is what we call financial responsibility

a man who is mean even to his woman with money likely will not take financial responsibility in marriage

being faithful and others stems from discipline and not being mean and stingy with money.

should your younger sister narrate this story to you like the op will you advise her to go ahead marry him?

Financial responsibility because they are legally married??

My younger sister will not be foolish enough to narrate such story to me!! I will scold her!!!

What is she doing with her Salary... How many times has she bought a gift for his guy , I am not talking about Boxers o !!
You have to be generous too.. That will leave your partner with no option than to reciprocate!!

Yes, anyone can set the example. It is an act!!!

Bride price loading tho....

nairalanduseles:


No am not broke

I have been living in Canada for over 10 years now

When I visit my partner in another suburb she appreciates the fact I can come spend time with her

She is not after gifts

You have not met real girls

Real girls appreciate your presence

A man's presence is more expensive than gifts....
Some women are begging their partners to come and spend time with them .....
On so many occasion, my female friend's virtually beg to have me spend a weekend with them,......That alone is more important to them than gifts!

MrBrownJay1:


You will never be able to FORCE a man into believing you "deserve" a gift, if he does NOT believe you deserve one.... Women do it all the time in r/ship... and what this man is doing is just the same.

The sad part here is that you believe that HE is the problem while the reality is that YOU ARE... This man is being honest and himself for MANY YEARS and you are trying to change him instead of simply getting rid of him. HE IS NOT YOUR TYPE, HE IS NOT THE TYPE OF MAN YOU DESIRE SO WHAT ARE YOU STAYING FOR?!

Waowwww

Lol he might not be stingy,may be you caused it... he brought Agege bread you left it for him to eat alone...so he might have felt you dont need his money nah...so learn to appreciate the gift wheather big or small.

Vega100:


It is because of people like you I now pay every lady I f*uck, and now see all like sex workers, na still because of people like you to see wife done hard me, despite how hard I try!!!
E no go better for all the women like you when don make every girl look like common prostitutes, e no go better for all of una one bit, the God i serve go punish all of una finish and make it also hard for you to see any good thing in this life.

Amen!!!

they re already getting punished with their monthly cramps

tabithababy:
Op, I beg you , forget the guy

Or prepare to feed him, his kids, his family and side chicks from your own money

He keeps seeing you as a fo'ool.... Am very sure you are giving him free sex, money, food and even calling him with your money

Loove ooooo

gerad da here. No cum spoil business give us oo

mharyamikeola92:
Pls help me move this to front page.

I am a working class lady and I hardly demand things from whosoever I love.

There is this guy that I ave been dating for years now. I don’t know what to call his behavior, whether it is stinginess or the other way round.

I noticed that whenever he comes visiting, he doesn’t bring anything and I get to cook and takecare of him. I was forced to talk 1 day.

The last time he came visiting, he brought bread and other stuffs along which he ended up eating all by himself. I decided not to cook or do anything but I couldn't take it so we went out to buy stuffs. I needed to use POS and I forgot my phone at home. So I begged him to transfer 5k to the lady and that I was going to transfer back to him when we get home. We ended up using the money to get chicken, pepper and other stuffs.

On getting home I demanded for his account details in order to transfer the money back and to my surprise, he gave me and I transferred the money.

My major concern is that this guy has never given me common N10 and he is working. I don’t know if he's worth settling down with cos I fear for my future. Will he be able to give if he has more? This is the guy that is already telling me to come meet his mum cos she wants to see me.

Pls no insults, just advice.

I agree he might be a lil bit stingy, talk to him about it and let him know you can't settle down with him if he persist, tell him to ease up a bit.

But come o u asked him to lend you some money not give, he is meant to collect it back if na me be the guy I go ask fa I am sorry that is not stinginess

[quote author=mharyamikeola92 post=86131151][/quote]

I hope you have plan B dating already?

Hmmmm Baby, you have been dating him for years ?
Have you ever tried to ask him something directly before, you are his Girlfriend, try to ask him maybe 6k or 8k, dont ask him for 5k because he might think, you want to collect your money back, try to ask him and let know his reply first then from there you can know which path to take.

Firstorderwizard:
I intentionally fake stinginess to enable me weed out fake girls with fake love.
95% of girls failed the test but my current babe
passed and she is reaping her rewards bountifully.

I have my rules for spending on her though

1. I only give when it is necessary not when she wants
2. I give to reward her when she does something impressive.

For example, through her efforts, I got a contract that fetched me a huge sum of money and juicy business connections.
I rewarded her by sponsoring her master's program (not by giving her cash).

mharyamikeola92, jaxxy and miketayo made very important contributions. You should sit down and understand your man, and most of all communicate. Just like the comment above, I come from a background where I have to be disciplined with spending so I only get things for my girl when absolutely necessary, during occasions or when she requests (which isn't often because she's not like the lot). Does that make me stingy?

You should have 100% responsibility mentality when it comes to relationships. Think about it this way, am I doing my best to make my relationship thrive without expecting anything in return? Or at the sight of any slight inconvenience, am I quick to put the blame on the other person? The 100% responsibility mentality ensures that you're doing the best to ensure your relationship thrives unconditionally.

There's a reason you brought this to social media and everyone wants you to dump him already. That's very convenient if you ask me but in life each challenge that we have is a gift and it makes us better. I'm a millenial, but sometimes I like to think like an elder.

This experience should teach you a lot about yourself. Do you feel entitled? Do you keep to your word (of paying back your debt)? Not buying something for you when he came to visit may have been for some reason and you could have jokingly found out about that, he's your man for goodness sakes, or better still encourage him to get you stuff when he comes around. He's your man, that won't hurt.

If nothing I typed up there makes any sense to you and you don't think you have the patience to work things out, by all means, do whatever that makes you happy. I believe everyone deserves happiness, whether it's based on material things or otherwise.

Do not settle for a stingy man or else you will for ever regret marrying him.

Millenniumlady:
Even if you have a well paying job he needs to be giving you monthly income to take care of your needs and he should at least buy you some wears or shoes when coming it's the responsible of a man to do this things i love and respect a guy that spend on me and pamper me.......The truth is....i can never take a guy who don't spend on me serious and I'll block his every access to me.......I'm just saying my mind

monthly income ko concoction ni, guys if you have a girl with this mentality japa she is not worth the stress

A man doesn’t need to spend too much on u to show he loves you. But any man who doesn’t at least try to do basic things for u without asking won’t make a good father. Walk away from that relationship not cuz of u but for ur children

atheistandproud:



Oh what a wicked world my brother.

A girl I once dated gave me boxers on a valentine's day while I bought her an expensive Swarovski bracelet adorned with precious stones + Rose flowers (her favourite) + Belgian chocolate.

I had a rethink about her that night but I didn't let it hinder the flow(night out).

I bounced the following month bro...No time!

tabithababy:
Op, I beg you , forget the guy

Or prepare to feed him, his kids, his family and side chicks from your own money

He keeps seeing you as a fo'ool.... Am very sure you are giving him free sex, money, food and even calling him with your money

Loove ooooo

Just look at your mouth. What do you mean by ‘giving him free sex’? Is sex now something people pay for or don’t they both enjoy the sex? I wonder why you ladies attach such importance to sex. What is in it that he should beg for it?

Humility017:


please Dear...that guy is not a husband material.
a man should be willing to take care of his woman needs to an extent and giving shouldn't be a problem at all.

please use your head...marriage is a life time thing that guy don't fits it for you from what you said up there.

if this is the only advice you pick then congrats otherwise sorry

King44:
monthly income ko concoction ni, guys if you have a girl with this mentality japa she is not worth the stress

So you mean you can't take care of the needs of your girlfriend

mharyamikeola92:


I really don’t lyk going out..But I don’t know how some1 will travel from Lagos to Osun without buying common bread

My advice is for you to dump him. Quietly distance yourself. It's in a mans nature to care for his woman. He is probably spending his money elsewhere.

When a lady tries to give an impression that they are independent and the guy takes it to the next level...frustration is the end result. Discuss with your man and never give an impression that you are miss independent.

pocohantas:


There is nothing fatherly about caring for your own! If the girl is unproductive and parasitic, I will personally tell him to dump her. If she is doing her best to please you, then you should please her too! These husband/wife roles na wetin dey make relationship sweet. It is what makes relationships memorable.

Let me tell you something, the worst thing that can happen to anyone is to have a partner who can survive without you. The minute they attain that, you become useless. Lots of Nigerian partners are useless!!



You think ladies that are cooking and cleaning your houses will be responsible in marriage?

Since you know life is not arithmetic, why don’t you go to a brothel and pick one lady there. Stop disturbing our ears with wife material talk.

All I was saying is that the OP should be patient with the boyfriend.
He is saving up for Bride price and real responsibilities that lie ahead as a would-be Husband!!

Brothel?? God forbid!!!

My point is that people change a lot after Marriage ..
You, of all people, should know that some guys can do everything during dating phase but change as soon as Marriage is settled!!
That he is spending now, does not automatically mean that he will be responsible in Marriage!!

As long as the guy is loyal and good in other aspects of the relationship, the spending aspect will fix itself!!

Bride Price loading tho.....