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Why Your Diasporan Friends And Family Do Not Send You Money When You Ask. - Family (21) - Nairaland

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Re: Why Your Diasporan Friends And Family Do Not Send You Money When You Ask. by DexterousOne(m): 2:28am On Aug 17, 2020
eazzzy1:


People have a bias and react to things through the lens of these biases. I am sure once he opened my thread he thought it was another diasporan bashing Nigerians in Nigeria post and he couldn't resist the impulse to defend the NIN.

True
Re: Why Your Diasporan Friends And Family Do Not Send You Money When You Ask. by DexterousOne(m): 2:40am On Aug 17, 2020
Shikena:


In fact, Nigerians abroad should stop sending money home & learn how the economy of their resident countries work. Some Nigerians are making a killing everyday in America but most still need to learn to use the financial system without the Nigerian mindset. We need to learn from the Scots, Indians, Pakistanis, Chinese etc. Stop wasting good investment money on useless ventures in Nigeria. You can do that when you have a flourishing business abroad. Just my opinion.

Well said
I agree wholeheartedly with you

2 Likes

Re: Why Your Diasporan Friends And Family Do Not Send You Money When You Ask. by DexterousOne(m): 2:51am On Aug 17, 2020
madridsta007:


6. Entitlement Mentality: This goes without saying. Any Nigerian who is "abroad" and legal is often quite busy- working, networking, studying, etc. His or her time is very premium to him/her. He or she has grown to understand value systems and concept of respect, gratitude, hard work, adaptability, flexibility, etc. Believe me, beyond what people say, the Nigerian "abroad" is not generally stingy; there is nothing "abroad" does to you that makes you stingy. If you are stingy "abroad" you must have been stingy in Nigeria. It is your character.

While the person "abroad" wants to help, the Nigerian in Nigeria should understand that you are NOT entitled to anything from this person abroad, unless you have a signed contract with the person. Hence if the person does anything for you, say "thank you" and mean it. You will not die. If the person spends hours speaking to you, chasing up things for you, and at the last minute, you drop the idea, PLEASE make sure you explain your reasons to the person and dont just ghost the person abroad. Believe me, he/she will regret ever making contact with you- his/her time is SO precious. Regardless of whom you are to him/her you are NOT entitled to his/her time. NO. Again, this person abroad will prefer you come to him/her with money-making ideas and NOT just begging each time. If you do that each time, he/she will avoid your calls and emails. I cant stress that enough.
Unfortunately Nigerians today, especially young Nigerians, are so entitled that you will wonder if it is a curse from somewhere. It annoys the Nigerian abroad and believe me, he/she will eventually avoid you. YOU ARENOT ENTITLED TO ANYONE'S MONEY OR TIME! Regard it! Express genuine gratitude! You wont die! grin

I once spent my time and resources to chase up a scholarship for someone to go to the US. After getting everything done in the US, this fellow in Nigeria told me he wasnt interested again as, "I dont like the course". Really In the end I had to apologise and create a reason to the University why the student couldnt come. This was three years ago. Today, the student is still going up and down and hasnt moved an inch from where he was 3 years ago. For me, I regret that my time was wasted and I had to re-build my reputation with this particular institution. Why Nigerians are so inflexible with opportunities and don’t understand the concept of time annoys me.

I can go on and on, but you get my point.


Just imagine the ingrate

Instead of him to accept the course and cross over...
This is just really unfortunate

3 Likes

Re: Why Your Diasporan Friends And Family Do Not Send You Money When You Ask. by DexterousOne(m): 2:55am On Aug 17, 2020
Meninmen:




Bros, out of every 20 Nigerians that go to US, Canada, UK, Australia, etc only 2 will not make it. There are more Nigerians making it abroad. I have countless testimonies that I Can't mention.

80% of all the big big houses in my city are owned by people living abroad. Forget all these talk. People are making it abroad.

Even my professional colleagues are moving out of the country in hundreds Every year. They just need like 2 to 3 years (some less sef) to settle down, then money will start rolling in.



For professionals, this is often the case
Re: Why Your Diasporan Friends And Family Do Not Send You Money When You Ask. by DexterousOne(m): 3:03am On Aug 17, 2020
gypsey:
Why do most nigerians or africans believes/thinks that migrating abroad is for financial reasons? it might be the case for some people but not for all, Anyway, i wouldn't know, i was born in east london.

Most of my previous neighbours are Nigerians, from the way i saw how they live they are not struggling atall. they own the property they live in, they drive brand new top of the range cars. they may have bought the cars on HP but what da heck! they are living good lives. i don't know about them sending money home but they tell me it's not about money it is about peace of mind, working system and believe me, nigerians knows how to take advantage of the system.

I visit my parents in nigeria since they relocated regularly and the things i saw in nigeria was baffling. bribery, extortion, lawlessness, intimidation, kidnapping, armed robbery, i mean how can a lorry fail break? and kill so many people, only in nigeria i heard lorries fail breaks, motorists driving the wrong way opposite cheesy no one is held responsible, no investigations, no arrests, no nothing. i am not saying accidents do not happen over here but when it does someone must pay!

for people who believes migrating abroad is a bad idea, well... as i ve said, i wouldn't know.

not every migrant is doing well but most are doing well... as i ve said again it might not be a financial issue for some.

Interesting perspective you got there


For someone like me...
It's all about the intangibles
I've had enough of the madness in Nigeria
Re: Why Your Diasporan Friends And Family Do Not Send You Money When You Ask. by madridsta007(m): 10:37am On Aug 17, 2020
DexterousOne:



Just imagine the ingrate

Instead of him to accept the course and cross over...
This is just really unfortunate

My brother, at the moment, Nigerians are generally ungrateful. It seems the words “please”, “thank you very much” have been banned from
Nigeria’s lexicon. I once told someone, “if you say ‘thank you’ will you die?”
There’s a terrible sense of ownership and entitlement mentality most Nigerians currently have. I wonder where it came from.

1 Like

Re: Why Your Diasporan Friends And Family Do Not Send You Money When You Ask. by uchvic(m): 4:38pm On Aug 17, 2020
Ur submission full my belle.. Well said!!!

[quote author=DexterousOne post=92904310]

The guy you quoted is right

That relative of yours dont owe you anything

However, if he wants to give you based on benevolence
He should
But he is not obliged to[
/quote]

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