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A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met - Romance (9) - Nairaland

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Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by LadyTianna(f): 6:36am On Oct 22, 2020
iRepNaija1:


OP, please don't pursue this. You're not even in a relationship with him and you two are already arguing, regardless of who is right or wrong. That's red flag number one. Red flag number two is that he wants you to come to his house only after a few days of talking. That's concerning because a) you should be meeting someone you don't know well in a public place, b) he should want to meet you in a public place for a meet-up or date, or c) he just wants sex. If you just want sex, then cool. But since you've declined his first offer, I don't think that's what you're going for. The third red flag is that he insulted you. From what you said, you told him, "I don't care." Is that an insult? To me, it's not because you did not criticize his person or his family. (Remember, critique the action, not the person). Could your response have been said in a better way? Maybe but you were straightforward. If he's willing to do this and you two have just started talking, imagine what could happen if you were dating or in a serious relationship.

He's just trying to test your limits to see how much B.S. he can get away with and how much B.S. you can tolerate. At 22, you're an adult but you're also much younger than him and he's seeing if he can take advantage of your possible lack of experience in dating. The fact that you're on NL may indicate to me you're still interested in him despite these red flags because if you weren't, I know you would've not continued talking with him.

I think you should really let this man go. It just sounds like wahala. You're young and there will be so many other men. When a man likes you and wants to spend time with you, you won't have to question it, you won't be on NL asking for advice from strangers. He will treat you like royalty and handle you like glass. You will never have to second-guess his feelings for you or his motives. Good luck.

Ladywealth please and please if you don't want tears, listen to this advice. If you pursue this relationship, trust me, it will not end well. Use your head
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by grimandevil: 6:37am On Oct 22, 2020
ladywealth:
Good evening my NL guys.

I just met a guy last month ending, we exchanged numbers and started chatting. He asked me out.. I really enjoyed chatting with him, just him alone. So few days after, he invited me to his house. I declined but I noticed that he stopped chatting with me.

Few days after, he asked about my genotype without even greeting me. I counter questioned him and he attacked me, claiming that he is not happy with me. I replied that 'I don't care'.
The next thing I received was rains of insults. Saying that I insulted him. I admitted and we settled it.

For the short times I've known him, I could see the kind of qualities I want in a man. But the problem he has and that he attested to is verbal abuse...

I noticed that anytime he invites me to his house and I declined, it always piss him off and he stops talking to me.
I decided not to visit him because it's not safe for me.

He argues over little things on chat, he talks to me like I'm a baby ( he is 33 and I'm 22). he is domineering... I'm just confused on the decision to date him considering all these flaws. I am suspicious of him being violent.
thanks

You mean he is Rich?
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by yemmit90: 6:38am On Oct 22, 2020
iRepNaija1:


By calling OP stupid and lacking respect, aren't you judging her and doing the very thing you told me not to do?

Op is a young GIRLS below 25 years?

Try to comprehence a post before you reply.

I will say it again, never judge from what anyone posted here (especially women) withiout hearing the other side of the story.

1 Like

Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by ephraim18(m): 6:39am On Oct 22, 2020
Go out there and protest... #endsars endpolicebrutality#Endcorruption in nigeria
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by Crownstar01: 6:42am On Oct 22, 2020
ladywealth:
Good evening my NL guys.

I just met a guy last month ending, we exchanged numbers and started chatting. He asked me out.. I really enjoyed chatting with him, just him alone. So few days after, he invited me to his house. I declined but I noticed that he stopped chatting with me.

Few days after, he asked about my genotype without even greeting me. I counter questioned him and he attacked me, claiming that he is not happy with me. I replied that 'I don't care'.
The next thing I received was rains of insults. Saying that I insulted him. I admitted and we settled it.

For the short times I've known him, I could see the kind of qualities I want in a man. But the problem he has and that he attested to is verbal abuse...

I noticed that anytime he invites me to his house and I declined, it always piss him off and he stops talking to me.
I decided not to visit him because it's not safe for me.

He argues over little things on chat, he talks to me like I'm a baby ( he is 33 and I'm 22). he is domineering... I'm just confused on the decision to date him considering all these flaws. I am suspicious of him being violent.
thanks
OP, you are really a funny young lady. It takes two to tango anyway. grin
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by Crownstar01: 6:43am On Oct 22, 2020
yemmit90:


Op is a young GIRLS below 25 years?

Try to comprehence a post before you reply.

I will say it again, never judge from what anyone posted here (especially women) withiout hearing the other side of the story.
Absolutely. Women are instigators. OP is young and foolish.
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by toprealman: 6:44am On Oct 22, 2020
ladywealth:
Good evening my NL guys.

I just met a guy last month ending, we exchanged numbers and started chatting. He asked me out.. I really enjoyed chatting with him, just him alone. So few days after, he invited me to his house. I declined but I noticed that he stopped chatting with me.

Few days after, he asked about my genotype without even greeting me. I counter questioned him and he attacked me, claiming that he is not happy with me. I replied that 'I don't care'.
The next thing I received was rains of insults. Saying that I insulted him. I admitted and we settled it.

For the short times I've known him, I could see the kind of qualities I want in a man. But the problem he has and that he attested to is verbal abuse...

I noticed that anytime he invites me to his house and I declined, it always piss him off and he stops talking to me.
I decided not to visit him because it's not safe for me.

He argues over little things on chat, he talks to me like I'm a baby ( he is 33 and I'm 22). he is domineering... I'm just confused on the decision to date him considering all these flaws. I am suspicious of him being violent.
thanks
You like him because he buys you ice cream. If not why this epistle when it is clear that he is not meant for you.
Next time take him out and sort the bills.......tell him how you genuinely feel. If he is still nasty, move!
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by puremaker7(m): 6:44am On Oct 22, 2020
9jaRealist:


Another crude misogynist... shocked
>
misandrist, Epele o...can't she sensed that guy as a potential women beater.
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by iRepNaija1: 6:44am On Oct 22, 2020
yemmit90:


Op is a young GIRLS below 25 years?

Try to comprehence a post before you reply.

I will say it again, never judge from what anyone posted here (especially women) withiout hearing the other side of the story.

You can't read and you need to learn how to spell. Don't quote me again.
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by UncleJJ(m): 6:47am On Oct 22, 2020
Originalsly:
You see the red flags.... warning signs.... DANGER.... but you're not sure if you should disregard the signs and keep moving forward. It is people like you that often make headlines here M I S S I N G...... and later on.....

INSTAGRAM BF ARRESTED FOR MURDER OF 22 YEAR OLD
A 33 year old Cyber Space man was arrested yesterday for the gruesome murder of 22 year old Lady Wealth, an indigene of Nairaland. He confessed to investigators that he was promised N200K by one Writ Tulist if he can produce the private parts of a decent young female. When asked why he had cut off her tongue he explained that she had insulted him earlier in the friendship and he...


www.nairaland.com/attachments/8186607_cfp124w_jpega5a27a25c78c16fece858c418e87c49b
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by tukdi: 6:47am On Oct 22, 2020
Originalsly:
You see the red flags.... warning signs.... DANGER.... but you're not sure if you should disregard the signs and keep moving forward. It is people like you that often make headlines here M I S S I N G...... and later on.....

INSTAGRAM BF ARRESTED FOR MURDER OF 22 YEAR OLD
A 33 year old Cyber Space man was arrested yesterday for the gruesome murder of 22 year old Lady Wealth, an indigene of Nairaland. He confessed to investigators that he was promised N200K by one Writ Tulist if he can produce the private parts of a decent young female. When asked why he had cut off her tongue he explained that she had insulted him earlier in the friendship and he...

grin
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by Olakunleyakub(m): 6:47am On Oct 22, 2020
Dont date him

He will not value you cos the age difference is alitle big much that is why he always abusing u verbally cos he actually takes you as sum1 he can be controlling anyhow.

Differently,
Does that mean you did not come across a guy of 25 to 29yearz that has the same qualities in him to date or u are just greedy about his money?
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by hustla(m): 6:47am On Oct 22, 2020
ladywealth:
Good evening my NL guys.

I just met a guy last month ending, we exchanged numbers and started chatting. He asked me out.. I really enjoyed chatting with him, just him alone. So few days after, he invited me to his house. I declined but I noticed that he stopped chatting with me.

Few days after, he asked about my genotype without even greeting me. I counter questioned him and he attacked me, claiming that he is not happy with me. I replied that 'I don't care'.
The next thing I received was rains of insults. Saying that I insulted him. I admitted and we settled it.

For the short times I've known him, I could see the kind of qualities I want in a man. But the problem he has and that he attested to is verbal abuse...

I noticed that anytime he invites me to his house and I declined, it always piss him off and he stops talking to me.
I decided not to visit him because it's not safe for me.

He argues over little things on chat, he talks to me like I'm a baby ( he is 33 and I'm 22). he is domineering... I'm just confused on the decision to date him considering all these flaws. I am suspicious of him being violent.
thanks


LOL if you check am now, the guy get money well well

Someone expressed his feelings and na 'I don't care' you see to reply with.. You deserve verbal abuse

Anyways, sit him down and talk to him.. People who date younger girls often tend to be domineering unknowingly.. A little discussion and if he has sense, he will step it down
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by hustla(m): 6:48am On Oct 22, 2020
Olakunleyakub:
Dont date him

He will not value you cos the age difference is alitle big much that is why he always abusing u verbally cos he actually takes you as sum1 he can be controlling anyhow.

Differently,
Does that mean you did not come across a guy of 25 to 29yearz that has the same qualities in him to date or u are just greedy about his money?


So Beyonce and JAY z age difference no too much abi?

Na 12 years Jay Z collect for her hand

Na 11 years this babe guy collect for her hand

So why the fuss?

1 Like

Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by NairaMaster1(m): 6:48am On Oct 22, 2020
Xoly:
Love is not all about understanding each other's love languages. Love is accepting his/her flaws....

The worst advice ever.

Violence and abuse are not flaws to be accepted in love sir.

1 Like

Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by Nobody: 6:51am On Oct 22, 2020
ArewaOduduwaBia:
Must u bring everything to nairaland? Now, what do u want us to do about what u just penned down? I will advise that u go join the protest. #End SARS.

There is a section for this which many people, especially ladies, enjoy. You can just skip the topics that are not meant for you.
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by adefolarinkelvi(m): 6:51am On Oct 22, 2020
Let me advise you on what i will tell my younger sister, dont go to his house, bet me, he will demand sex from you, perharps its too early for you to visit his house, you guys can meet outside not his house....pls dont fall for his stunt of him asking you for your genotype, to me its a stragegy to make you feel that he's serious type of guy that want to marry you.... dont fall for him too easily or else he will use you and still dump you. I am speaking from experience and am much more older than this your guy in question.
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by uchennaq(m): 6:55am On Oct 22, 2020
The truth is that you can never be a good judge if you pass judgement only by hearing one side of the story. Of course the op will garnish the post to suit her, never including what she has done. This same thing happened to me infact my story is even worse. She won't post what led to her lover abusing her..Never.

1 Like

Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by karnap(m): 6:56am On Oct 22, 2020
when he said you upset him,you as a gentleman lady,you no supposed say you "don't care" that might not go down well with him,from your attitude you can also get angry when a man is angry and that can't build a relationship,I like you for admitted that you annoyed him but hey be calm, your attitude might change him.
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by yemmit90: 6:56am On Oct 22, 2020
iRepNaija1:


You can't read and you need to learn how to spell. Don't quote me again.

Must you insult others before giving out your opinion?

Well, didnt expects less from someone who cannot comprehend a simple logical sentence.
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by Crownstar01: 6:57am On Oct 22, 2020
adefolarinkelvi:
Let me advise you on what i will tell my younger sister, dont go to his house, bet me, he will demand sex from you, perharps its too early for you to visit his house, you guys can meet outside not his house....pls dont fall for his stunt of him asking you for your genotype, to me its a stragegy to make you feel that he's serious type of guy that want to marry you.... dont fall for him too easily or else he will use you and still dump you. I am speaking from experience and am much more older than this your guy in question.
Hahaha.
Look, there are couple of ways to make women visit you and I'm not going to disclose them here.

My girlfriend paid a visit to me after meeting her the first time. cheesy
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by Abudu2000(m): 7:01am On Oct 22, 2020
Come to endsars protest ground!! Na youth wey protest to make Nigeria great you suppose marry
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by seanbabz: 7:03am On Oct 22, 2020
There re some questions you need to ask yourself .

What's matters to you in a relationship?
Can you absorb the abusive words,cus he won't change.
His over dominating,are you ready to be over submissive,if care is not taking you will become a fugitive in this relationship

Final verdict: it's better you avoid the impending disaster than dipping yourself into it,it might cause you your life.
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by eziezi90(m): 7:07am On Oct 22, 2020
If you love your life and your future, move on

The signs are already there

Goodluck


ladywealth:
Good evening my NL guys.

I just met a guy last month ending, we exchanged numbers and started chatting. He asked me out.. I really enjoyed chatting with him, just him alone. So few days after, he invited me to his house. I declined but I noticed that he stopped chatting with me.

Few days after, he asked about my genotype without even greeting me. I counter questioned him and he attacked me, claiming that he is not happy with me. I replied that 'I don't care'.
The next thing I received was rains of insults. Saying that I insulted him. I admitted and we settled it.

For the short times I've known him, I could see the kind of qualities I want in a man. But the problem he has and that he attested to is verbal abuse...

I noticed that anytime he invites me to his house and I declined, it always piss him off and he stops talking to me.
I decided not to visit him because it's not safe for me.

He argues over little things on chat, he talks to me like I'm a baby ( he is 33 and I'm 22). he is domineering... I'm just confused on the decision to date him considering all these flaws. I am suspicious of him being violent.
thanks
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by Olakunleyakub(m): 7:08am On Oct 22, 2020
Age difference is not really the issue if both partners understand it.


You need to read post again and see where the lady said he used to talk to her any how

So what do you think might really be the reason for that sir?
hustla:



So Beyonce and JAY z age difference no too much abi?

Na 12 years Jay Z collect for her hand

Na 11 years this babe guy collect for her hand

So why the fuss?
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by Crownstar01: 7:08am On Oct 22, 2020
seanbabz:
There re some questions you need to ask yourself .

What's matters to you in a relationship?
Can you absorb the abusive words,cus he won't change.
His over dominating,are you ready to be over submissive,if care is not taking you will become a fugitive in this relationship

Final verdict: it's better you avoid the impending disaster than dipping yourself into it,it might cause you your life.
What disaster? OP is living in a bubble of spoiled behaviour in general and wants to milk the guy first before giving him the cookie.
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by Nobody: 7:10am On Oct 22, 2020
Ardar:
Is his name Obinna bright?
With a burnt black complexion? Did he try to kiss you on the day you guys exchanged numbers?

If he's the one pls run far away.
shocked
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by uchennaq(m): 7:11am On Oct 22, 2020
The truth is that you can't give proper advise without hearing the other side of the story. The op might make it look as if she is perfect and the next thing is you pass judgement foolishly. I have made arrangements with a girl I love on how we are going to spend atleast one week together. She never told me that she had another motive, infact she kept assuring me that she will soon be with me, that she wants to conclude a business she has with someone in another location, can you guys believe that for more than one week now, she is still in that new location. This was someone I made arrangements with. She promised me more than 3 times that she will be with me without fulfilling all her promises. The truth is that sometimes people don't know what they want. Sometimes people lie alot. Sometimes people use their hands to quash their relationship, some people that don't know what really happened are giving you stupid advises as per professional love doctor. You are 22yrs old, you are an adult, you can fool or decieve everyone here but you can't fool yourself and God. If you care and love him, try and see if you can make it work. Sorry I can't believe all your story because it will be partial.
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by olaniyilukman(m): 7:23am On Oct 22, 2020
what kind of rubbish are you bringing up this morning...
Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by Dybala11(m): 7:29am On Oct 22, 2020
ladywealth:
Good evening my NL guys.

I just met a guy last month ending, we exchanged numbers and started chatting. He asked me out.. I really enjoyed chatting with him, just him alone. So few days after, he invited me to his house. I declined but I noticed that he stopped chatting with me.

Few days after, he asked about my genotype without even greeting me. I counter questioned him and he attacked me, claiming that he is not happy with me. I replied that 'I don't care'.
The next thing I received was rains of insults. Saying that I insulted him. I admitted and we settled it.

For the short times I've known him, I could see the kind of qualities I want in a man. But the problem he has and that he attested to is verbal abuse...

I noticed that anytime he invites me to his house and I declined, it always piss him off and he stops talking to me.
I decided not to visit him because it's not safe for me.

He argues over little things on chat, he talks to me like I'm a baby ( he is 33 and I'm 22). he is domineering... I'm just confused on the decision to date him considering all these flaws. I am suspicious of him being violent.
thanks
Irrespective of all the qualities he might seem to possess, never put up with an abusive/violent partner, never put up with a partner who always believed that he's always right. Love alone is not enough to build a good relationship, trust, mutual respect, humility, compromise are few of the things needed to build a healthy/good relationship. I bet that the man always find it hard to apologise/say sorry whenever you guys have arguments, very bad character that is.
But then, who am I to pass judgement when I've not even heard the other side of the story?
One of the common relationship mistakes we do make is that we are often trying to be with the right/better person only, but we don't often strive to be the right/better person ourselves, else the endless cycle of bad relationship experiences among us.

1 Like

Re: A Verbally Abusive Guy I Just Met by 30naira: 7:30am On Oct 22, 2020
ladywealth:
Good evening my NL guys.

I just met a guy last month ending, we exchanged numbers and started chatting. He asked me out.. I really enjoyed chatting with him, just him alone. So few days after, he invited me to his house. I declined but I noticed that he stopped chatting with me.

Few days after, he asked about my genotype without even greeting me. I counter questioned him and he attacked me, claiming that he is not happy with me. I replied that 'I don't care'.
The next thing I received was rains of insults. Saying that I insulted him. I admitted and we settled it.

For the short times I've known him, I could see the kind of qualities I want in a man. But the problem he has and that he attested to is verbal abuse...

I noticed that anytime he invites me to his house and I declined, it always piss him off and he stops talking to me.
I decided not to visit him because it's not safe for me.

He argues over little things on chat, he talks to me like I'm a baby ( he is 33 and I'm 22). he is domineering... I'm just confused on the decision to date him considering all these flaws. I am suspicious of him being violent.
thanks

we havent heard froom him, but From your post, it seems you are a rude person too. He said he is angry with you, and your response was 'I don't care'? Lol, maybe you both have attitude problem

1 Like

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