Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / NewStats: 3,194,939 members, 7,956,535 topics. Date: Monday, 23 September 2024 at 01:34 PM |
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? (21465 Views)
Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? / How To Discipline Your Child The Smart And Healthy Way-UNICEF / What Did You Do To Receive The Worst Beating Your Parents Ever Gave You? (2) (3) (4)
(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (Reply) (Go Down)
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by babtoundey(m): 9:44pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
It depends on the child. As the Yoruba mothers will say, there are two sects of children omo; egba (a child that listens only when beaten or threatened with cane) and omo enu (a child that needs just slight abuse, facial signal, and conselling to yield to instructions). Left for me, I don't advocate for flogging of children. Parents can be strict and instil discipline on their children without having to use cane on them. |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by kazyhm(m): 9:51pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
bizme: Nonsense. How can you equate correctional spanking to bully and still add submission to it ? No single thing /approach on earth that does not have it advantages and disadvantages. Beat and talk as and when necessary. Have you ever wonder how some grown up ass ended up with empty brain, no discipline, no knowledge of anything worth emulating, no moral, no values.....they follows anything sheepishly. How many spoilt brats that ended up wasting every resources invested on them.....let me stop here.... I think its unwise to compare and contrast on issue like this.........because there seem to be some influences beyond our grasp that direct each and every individual paths in life....flogging or not. Some folks without parent figure sometimes ended up better that those that were train; some with iron hands and other with soft hand.....but all in all I apply talks and beating as and when necessary. African, especially Nigerians are becoming brain dead by the day....many people nowadays subject everything to how they feel about it without any factual reason.....and I think to a large extent sadly, contribute to our Summersaulting policies that has and will not move us forward in any particular progressing direction.....we tend to lose focus on the purpose of things... Same way females has started engaging in some fruitless arguments in favour of abolishing house chores; feeling it is enslaving their gender but then recommending it for males that is overwhelmed with more tasking, technical and risky house chores....... 2 Likes |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by authority2006(m): 9:53pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
CalliDora1: Until one day when someone will report you and investigation carried out and your children are taken away from you. Africans need to evolve about the way we raise our kids, all these beatings, punishment, abuse, bullying into submission are not the best way to raise kids. Look at our society, does the beating really reflect positively? |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by obinnawhyte(m): 9:55pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
chii8: but you didn't mention the possibility of another succumbing to cane to quarantine since every child differs and respond to different displinary measures |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by hustla(m): 9:55pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
Yes ooooo A few strokes of the cane from time to time is needed |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by jaxxy(m): 9:56pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
It is almost mandatory especially for stubborn kids. It's non negotiable. 1 Like |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by hustla(m): 9:56pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
authority2006: Yes it does Or else pikin for dey talk 'f*ck you' for in mama for where all man dey Seems you don't know how these oyinbo children behave |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by obinnawhyte(m): 10:02pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
Mindlog: but that's not the case here . This is like condemning someone for being against white wedding because the person thinks he or she is in Nigeria and should go with out tradition. Hope you can also ask your 18 years old child to leave because you think he or she is already an adult like is done outside here |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by Nobody: 10:02pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
kingxsamz: I prolly would have formed it a habit and it would have affected my studies. So, the earlier you correct a child the better because if they grow stronger than you, you won't enjoy your old age. |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by hstar: 10:08pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
Ok |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by emmyN(m): 10:28pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
I honestly don't know what I would do. Sometimes these kids just get on your nerves. One needs lots of emotional maturity and intelligence to handle and avoid harming them. 1 Like |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by bepositive11: 10:30pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
It's crazy how people are against men beating women, but are in favor of parents beating their children. The latter is worst because children are much more vulnerable -- emotionally, physically, and psychologically. 2 Likes |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by matm: 10:34pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
When I hear some Nigerians saying don't beat a child just like the white men no matter what,I laugh.Hand ur kid over to such people to live with,and u will be shocked over the outcome.We claim to be more empathetic even more than God who taught us how to love one another but in reality,it is pure hypocrisy. Just as our faces are different,so are our characters and inclinations.There are kids that won't be useful without flogging.Some need flogging once in a while,some will learn easily by other means of corrections apart from flogging.As an adult,study a child under u and find out what works for him/her. But know you that every kid needs to be trained to be tough to some extent in preparation for the future .This is because,life itself is tough and doesn't pamper anyone.Lets be sincere for once.Adults including those who have kids are flogged and beaten daily by the police,market task force,local vigilante etc.I have seen where mothers were flogged mercilessly for flouting simple order of the local market officials.Ask anyone that is a commercial driver,and he will tell u how often he has been slapped by touts,security agents,revenue collectors.Thats why many of them tend to be saucy,wild and ever ready to fight at all times. So,the kids u are pampering will soon find themselves in the real world where they can't make it unless they are tough and u can't be there to protect them again,even if u are,both u and ur grown up children will l lose some teeth with bruised faces .Even the holy book upholds spanking,but mortals claiming to be wiser and more loving than God are saying don't spank any child.If u don't spank ur child that needs spanking for corrective purpose,he will spank you when he grows and no one will be there to help u.He will only be beaten to stupor and probably jailed if he tries that on someone's else parents In conclusion,flogging can't be ruled out as disciplinary measure,but it should not be abused.Dont flog in anger and don't over flog Don't flog a child all over his body for u may injure him or leave him with scars Flog for the kids that can't behave without flogging pointing out to the child the reason for the punishment which is to correct him.Flog few strokes only on palms or buttocks depending on the offence and the child's ability to bear spanking But in most other cases ,administer other corrective measures except if the child is very stubborn.Dont flog a child for an offence committed the first time.Caution him and flog if other options fail.Be persistent,for training a child is where the labour lies . Even if u refuse to discipline ur child as deemed fit,the society will deal with him without mercy as he grows and steps on toes.But will u be able to bear the pain when the time comes as he turns to blame u. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by efficiencie(m): 10:39pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
@bizme. The goal of punishment (negative reinforcement) is to teach the child that consequences follow bad decisions and the goal of rewarding good behaviour (positive reinforcement) is to teach the child that there a beneficial incentives associated with good behaviour. The problem with today's parents is that they have misused both punishments and rewards. Many parents today punish out of anger and end up harming the child mentally, physically and even spiritually. Also many parents have often provided rewards for reasons other than providing an incentive for good behavior. Used in the right manner punishments and rewards can be effectively combined as a means of socialisation and hence I do not believe in the unbalanced use of positive discipline alone because life itself is not entirely positive and the well rounded child must be trained to respond appropriately to the positive as well as the negative. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by ravensckar(m): 10:41pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
bizme:Well, permit me to disagree with you two. I have a 3 year old daughter who sometimes behave like a 'cow'. Whenever she's angry, she throws herself on the floor and destroys whatever is in her sight. At first, I tried speaking and going easy on her until I realized that she was testing my resolve. Then I remembered my father's favourite saying; 'A big madness will give way to a bigger madness'. By the time I swung into action with my tiny sized cane, belt and cloth hanger. That spirit of 'stubborness' left her. Now, she's as well behaved as I had expected. Yes, it doesn't mean I don't pamper or play with her. As a matter of fact, she plays with me more than her mum. If I return late from work, my child won't sleep. She'll be shouting 'My daddy'. In summary, I have always been in favour of using the rod to correct a child and to use some form of punishment as a disciplinary measure. If not for how my parents disciplined me, God knows what I might have become today.... |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by thinkmoney(m): 10:50pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
bizme:Oyinbo obviously do better economically, buy they are more immoral my friend. They have even gone further in many instances to set up institutions and laws to protect their immoral lifestyles 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by matm: 10:51pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
hustla: Even here in Nigeria, I have seen a kid that calls the mom abusive names and beats her while nagging whenever he can't have his way and the mom laughs over it claiming she does that b/c he is still a kid and as such will correct himself when he grows.If the cautions him,he talks back.No respect |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by thinkmoney(m): 10:51pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
bizme:Oyinbos are obviously doing better economically, but they are more immoral my friend. They have even set up institutions and laws to protect their immoral lifestyles |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by stanliwise(m): 11:19pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
Ishilove:Well said, beating a child because you are angry is different from beating a child to cut short the reward system of him going on that act again. But the line is quite thin sometimes. |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by Thisismjay: 11:19pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
J111333:. Mhad mhad |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by Thisismjay: 11:20pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
Great Thisismjay: |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by stanliwise(m): 11:22pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
thinkmoney:You lied, when we say immoral, we are talking about stealing public funds, killing on political elections, evading justice system and handing guns to youth to shoot anyone on your way. This dark men ruling our country where are children of some people that thought the discipline them. If all family trained their children morally well enough then it will show case in the society. Nigeria society is very dirty and even for a child. |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by stanliwise(m): 11:23pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
matm:It is called permissive parenting. When parent do not take the parent figure in life of a child. 1 Like |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by Asahi: 11:45pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
kazyhm:Nigeria is the most morally bereft countries on this earth |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by Asahi: 11:46pm On Jan 02, 2021 |
psyco:Do you not have Google? Which countries have the highest HDI and GDP per capita? Which countries are the happiest in the world? |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by Bunsenbun(m): 12:04am On Jan 03, 2021 |
klap4gbens:that is their own cup of tea.Upon all the beating what moral good has the society shown for it.The surging crime rate ahbii is it our politicians that were not disciplined with the rod.That method is clearly not working. 1 Like |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by IgboWarlord(m): 12:28am On Jan 03, 2021 |
No beating for me..There are other effective measures to instill discipline. |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by thinkmoney(m): 12:33am On Jan 03, 2021 |
stanliwise:Well, I admit in 'that immoral', we are worse off. But u can't really blame all those on the type of discipline we had or didn't. Many of our woes are caused by this oyinbos; forcing dissimilar people together causes unhealthy competition and they have so bastardized our psych by not only colonizing us but also stealing over many centuries our wealth and men. We feel so inferior now and result to preying on each other. All this things are psychological |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by Gamesmart: 1:24am On Jan 03, 2021 |
bizme: Please can you highlight this alternative disciplinary measures? |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by Nobody: 1:48am On Jan 03, 2021 |
May your wisdom increase. I chuckle whenever I read some crediting our Nigerian society with a better morality than the developed countries. The average Nigerian is corrupt, aggressive, nonchalant, and promiscuous. I have lived in different countries and I can relate with these. How about we start connecting the dots if these social vices in the country are not indeed connected with the way we bring children up in this country. I think we already know the answer. kingxsamz: 2 Likes |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by Nobody: 1:55am On Jan 03, 2021 |
Amen!!!! SpartanJ: |
Re: Child Discipline: Do You Believe In Beating Your Child? by Nobody: 2:05am On Jan 03, 2021 |
No, I am not destroying my children. The two of them are some of the most behaved and kind kids you will find around. More importantly they are very free with and close to me. My mother-in-law called me yesterday to commend the upbringing of my son, after she observed his attitude and smartness...very high for his age. When I was his age I had already learned how to be scared of my own parents. So, I believe my wife and I are doing something right. Our goal is to raise kind, focused and disciplined human beings. The word discipline doesn't mean beating by the way. Logan23: 2 Likes |
(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (Reply)
Amazing Five Generations Family Photo / Happy Mothers Day: Share The Funniest Memory Of Your Mum / “A Househelp Is Employed To Work Not To Go To School” - Lady On Twitter
(Go Up)
Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 84 |