ceeceeuwa:

Even #250 bread, the Bobo no fit buy!
Their hate for women on this forum won't make them see reasons.

Trayceey:
I Need Your Opinion On This Issue That's Threatening My Relationship

My fiance wanted to come to the house to see my mum but I told him I won't be around because I'm about heading out to somewhere, so he asked me if my mum would be around, then I said yes and he said he would still go to see her and it doesn't matter if I'm not around.

When I later got home that night, my mum complained that he came empty handed. He didn't bring anything for her and she was the one who offered him her drink.

Although initially, I didn't see anything wrong with that but when my mum expressed her displeasure, I later called him to ask why he came to the house empty handed then I let him know I wasn't happy with him, that it would have been better if he didn't come. He tried arguing with me but I hung up.

Since then, we haven't spoken to each other nor visited each other. Was I wrong?

Xmen149:


A real igbo mother will feel like she is pimping her daughter out by collecting anything from him.

My mum then collected all the gift my sister received from the guy that wanted to marry her and kept in her room. instructed the guy not to bring her self anything.

told my sister to take time study the guy and if she change her mind so they can easily return his gifts that the man may not hold anything against her.

boyfriend is boyfriend,if you like baptize it fiance.
If he hasn't paid bride price he is not in-law he is boyfriend.

Mariangeles:


We are Africans. Let us be honest with ourselves.

A man going alone to visit his would-be mother in-law empty handed is a red flag. Something to worry about.
What was the purpose of the visit?
Even as a female, it is still wrong to go visit the mother of the man you're going to marry empty handed.

Mariangeles:


I don't know about the others, but in my tribe (Igbo), that's how things are done.
You don't go to your in-laws bare handed.
It is not an act to be proud of.

MakyavelitheDon:





After seeing the way you replied some people here on nairaland and after saying you hung up on your future husband it's shows me some things about you
1. You lack grace
2. You're Ill mannered and Ill tempered
3. You have your priorities completely twisted and you have no idea what marriage is about
4. Youre pompous and arrogant


I can go on but let me peg it there.

Now that your mother had used her witchcraft to truncate your marriage plans let her go and bring husband from inside the river for you.

I give that guy kudos for taking off... Both you and your mother don't seem like people a reasonable guy would wanna spend his life connected to

Trayceey:
I Need Your Opinion On This Issue That's Threatening My Relationship

My fiance wanted to come to the house to see my mum but I told him I won't be around because I'm about heading out to somewhere, so he asked me if my mum would be around, then I said yes and he said he would still go to see her and it doesn't matter if I'm not around.

When I later got home that night, my mum complained that he came empty handed. He didn't bring anything for her and she was the one who offered him her drink.

Although initially, I didn't see anything wrong with that but when my mum expressed her displeasure, I later called him to ask why he came to the house empty handed then I let him know I wasn't happy with him, that it would have been better if he didn't come. He tried arguing with me but I hung up.

Since then, we haven't spoken to each other nor visited each other. Was I wrong?

Mariangeles:


I don't know about the others, but in my tribe (Igbo), that's how things are done.
You don't go to your in-laws bare handed.
It is not an act to be proud of.

osazsky:
it has to be igbo..cuz of the way they are so concerned abt material things..my friend who got married to an igbo girl on his wedding list his wife dad added roofing sheets i was shocked.since that day anytime i see amaka i quickly take another route though i was the one who registered her in a tailoring shop.had to run for my life..i was young then sha

nonut:
Anty', speak for yourself. I'm an igbo too. We're not long-throats who are ever ready to collect. You're probably from Owerri or Mbaise...same with the Tracy girl. They're the people with this kind of entitlement mentality. Always waiting to collect...

izzou:


cc: BRATISLAVA

I hope you understand who a fiancé is in Igbo tradition

It's not when it comes to gifts you'll start talking about tradition

izzou:


cc: BRATISLAVA

I hope you understand who a fiancé is in Igbo tradition

It's not when it comes to gifts you'll start talking about tradition

Regex:
Make it a standard that whoever you date from now on should bring gifts when coming to see you. You should break up with your fiance. He's still a kid.

Ferrous:
Has the young guy visited before?

Deffjam:
she should not marry him? Haba aunty? Haba mana?

Trayceey:
I Need Your Opinion On This Issue That's Threatening My Relationship

My fiance wanted to come to the house to see my mum but I told him I won't be around because I'm about heading out to somewhere, so he asked me if my mum would be around, then I said yes and he said he would still go to see her and it doesn't matter if I'm not around.

When I later got home that night, my mum complained that he came empty handed. He didn't bring anything for her and she was the one who offered him her drink.

Although initially, I didn't see anything wrong with that but when my mum expressed her displeasure, I later called him to ask why he came to the house empty handed then I let him know I wasn't happy with him, that it would have been better if he didn't come. He tried arguing with me but I hung up.

Since then, we haven't spoken to each other nor visited each other. Was I wrong?

GIANTPLUSHUB:


Traceey, we have passed that culture things. Now, everyone is trying to be careful and put somethings into test. You see, your man did nothing wrong at all.

How about he does not takes anything to your house but he gives you peace and comfort in marriage and always support if any situation arises in your own family side?

You need to think and go beg your man. So far he's a good guy to you. Somethings just need wisdom. Since he's into going to your house without buying something along. Next time, whenever he wants to go, try and meet him up and handover something to him to give them at home. Maybe as time goes on, he will get used to it. Do this with calm and good words, like you just want your family to see him as a more better good man.

All the very best.

Xmen149:


I know women from igbo that does that thing.

they label it igbo culture bcs they are fund of bending things concerning Igbos upside down and call it general.

be open about where you guys went to to marry that lady..either abia or imo
..I no won go further sha... anyone that speaks and writes igbo very well will notice the kind of igbo those supporting her are written...lol

Trayceey:
I'm not defending my mum. You know these mothers always have a hold on us

Mariangeles:
How come nobody understands the principle of giving gifts and the honour that comes with it?
It is not about what you give, it is the thought that counts.
If the young man had brought something as simple as fruits and the woman complained, then she would've been wrong.

It has nothing to do with poverty. Only someone with poverty mentality would think expecting gift(s) from someone is out of place, and only someone with inferiority complex would think it is a thing of shame to except gift from a certain someone.

"A man's gift makes room for him, and brings him before great men"

Giving gifts will make way for you in the presence of Kings and great men.

osazsky:
which one is boyfriend and fiance again..one is correct english the other is pigin English they both mean the same thing...u are called a married man after u have paid the bride price.i nor understand both of una aguement..pls explain to me d diff btw boyfriend and fiance.its a public forum i want to learn something new

engrgd:


Your Mom isn't wrong with what she said and you pointing it out to him isn't wrong. He should have gotten something for her no matter how small. He should know that. Please if he wants to leave, let him go. Don't beg him, he's a proud person. You deserve better joor. #MomIsRight

Trayceey:
I Need Your Opinion On This Issue That's Threatening My Relationship

My fiance wanted to come to the house to see my mum but I told him I won't be around because I'm about heading out to somewhere, so he asked me if my mum would be around, then I said yes and he said he would still go to see her and it doesn't matter if I'm not around.

When I later got home that night, my mum complained that he came empty handed. He didn't bring anything for her and she was the one who offered him her drink.

Although initially, I didn't see anything wrong with that but when my mum expressed her displeasure, I later called him to ask why he came to the house empty handed then I let him know I wasn't happy with him, that it would have been better if he didn't come. He tried arguing with me but I hung up.

Since then, we haven't spoken to each other nor visited each other. Was I wrong?