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Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience - Family (4) - Nairaland

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Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by Nobody: 7:18am On Mar 01, 2021
tunjijones:


U didnt answer the question
because that hardly happen, compare to cheating that is now normal among married women.

1 Like

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by meobizy(f): 7:57am On Mar 01, 2021
It doesn't affect my existence. All I crave today is chicken and chips during the afternoon then suya at night.

3 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by FreeSpirited: 8:58am On Mar 01, 2021
Danhoys:
I could totally relate to you dear op, but I'm sure we're the lucky ones.

First of all, you married someone you love, someone you find both romantically and sexually attractive.

That's a plus.

When I and my hubby were passing through this turbulent phase, what helped was having similar interest.

I'm hugely into politics, and so is my husband. Trust me, there is always something to gist on when he's back from work.

Aside from politics, we're both hardcore gamers too, and we're already saving to get PS4, and it doesn't stop us from giving our young kids the attention they deserve.

Aside that, we both have huge interest in other areas too, like science. There is always something to talk about.

I've always love men who are built, and my husband knows this.

Every weekend, we go running, and we help each stay fit. Sometimes I teases him that he should be a model, and I do take alluring pictures of him too.

I'm a super intelligent lady, (not bragging), so I ensured that my husband's intellect matched with mine before saying 'I do!'

We've been married for 5 years now, and the love and fun is still there. During leave, we always make it a duty to travel to another state, and see an interesting place.

A week vacation doesn't hurt, and it has a way to rekindle the love we have for each other.

When you marry your friend, you discover that your love is new every morning lol.

Work and children can't steal love away, that's an excuse people give to avoid talking about how they no longer find their partner attractive or interesting.

I don't want to talk about sex, cause ours is on a whole new level. Sex shouldn't be the traditional offing of light and missionary thrusting.

That's boring!!! It needs spicing every time or it becomes boring and a chore.

I wouldn't like to go into details, before some religious folks label us sinners.

You have work to do, and I'm sure you've gotten a cue from my write up. Wishing you more bliss in marriage.
But your husband is different from her husband.. and she also do not have any intersecting interest with her husband....Your case is quite lucky and salvageable...only if her husband is ready to work on it...which I proudly doubt

2 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by generationz(f): 10:29am On Mar 01, 2021
This thing about gisting all the gist really baffles me?

Do you people really marry your intellectual equal or someone you flow with on the same level or do you marry people cause of looks and shared external values (like being a Christian) cause gist no dey ever finish o.

As for the sex part, there should be more awareness for intending couples especially those who marry based on looks which is about 70%. Looks are important for sexual arousal but there are things that can turn one off after a while no matter how sexy the chick is or guy. Will you be sexually attracted to a man who lies, a dirty woman, a man who is lazy, etc Pregnancy can reduce a woman's sexual desire. Stretch marks, weight gain can make a man lose interest in his wife. These are real issues no one wants to talk about because we don't want to think about the negatives while planning.

16 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by generationz(f): 10:39am On Mar 01, 2021
justosee:

You see... cheating on both sides maintains the marriage and happiness of both party codedly. Argue with me all you care...that's the reality..
Meanwhile, the stupid couples when they start the cheating game, they transfer the bottled anger and aggression on their partner which usually cause breakup......While the coded smart ones maintain their marriage and we keep praising and complimenting their marriage as the best thing that ever happened since Adam and Eve.
May God give us wisdom in all we do.


While I agree that so many marriages are not what it seems to be on the outside (maybe 60%) any marriage that requires cheating to maintain the "happiness" is a farce.

There are many old people who still make love to each other.

7 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by Judybash93(m): 10:57am On Mar 01, 2021
Danhoys:
I could totally relate to you dear op, but I'm sure we're the lucky ones.

First of all, you married someone you love, someone you find both romantically and sexually attractive.

That's a plus.

When I and my hubby were passing through this turbulent phase, what helped was having similar interest.

I'm hugely into politics, and so is my husband. Trust me, there is always something to gist on when he's back from work.

Aside from politics, we're both hardcore gamers too, and we're already saving to get PS4, and it doesn't stop us from giving our young kids the attention they deserve.

Aside that, we both have huge interest in other areas too, like science. There is always something to talk about.

I've always love men who are built, and my husband knows this.

Every weekend, we go running, and we help each stay fit. Sometimes I teases him that he should be a model, and I do take alluring pictures of him too.

I'm a super intelligent lady, (not bragging), so I ensured that my husband's intellect matched with mine before saying 'I do!'

We've been married for 5 years now, and the love and fun is still there. During leave, we always make it a duty to travel to another state, and see an interesting place.

A week vacation doesn't hurt, and it has a way to rekindle the love we have for each other.

When you marry your friend, you discover that your love is new every morning lol.

Work and children can't steal love away, that's an excuse people give to avoid talking about how they no longer find their partner attractive or interesting.

I don't want to talk about sex, cause ours is on a whole new level. Sex shouldn't be the traditional offing of light and missionary thrusting.

That's boring!!! It needs spicing every time or it becomes boring and a chore.

I wouldn't like to go into details, before some religious folks label us sinners.

You have work to do, and I'm sure you've gotten a cue from my write up. Wishing you more bliss in marriage.

Let the religious folks talk... Please enlighten us on the sex stuff o jare. It's nothing
Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by RealGboy: 11:23am On Mar 01, 2021
generationz:
This thing about gisting all the gist really baffles me?

Do you people really marry your intellectual equal or someone you flow with on the same level or do you marry people cause of looks and shared external values (like being a Christian) cause gist no de.




Why not get married first before dishing out advice ?.... easy to just spit trash .... like all football fans saying a footballer should have passed the ball .... why not be on the pitch first

1 Like

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by nnamdiosu(m): 11:42am On Mar 01, 2021
Rhodaogunpeju:
I decided to write this because I have come to realize that Love can get boring..
.
I remember when I met my husband , he was such a Nice and handsome Man. I mean I already decided if he ask me out I will say yes from the first day I met him but I still made him beg and purse me for a whole year before finally accepting to date him ..

6 months after our relationship we got married. and our marriage was bliss , I married a friend , we have our downs and quarell but we always make up before we sleep because of the fact that we made it compulsory that we must have a family prayer Every night , we usually settle most of our fights during these prayers ..

But sometimes marriages can get boring , you have gisted all the entire gist ,talk about everything talkable till there is actually nothing to talk about,. Then the husband starts drifting away .maybe he's got a new friend or found a new love ...sometime this new love might not be a person ,For instance my husband new love is politics..He's always working and when he's home he is either watching the News on Tv and even when he tries to talk to me he will be like "Baby can you believe what kai muhammad said again"..

And I'm just sitting like who and what is my concern with lai muhammad?... Yet he doesn't see my reaction,he just continues to talk untill we fall asleep.i listen to him because I have to he is my husband.

The love flame was slowly wearing our ,I mean he no longer wants me to wait for him before I eat. .. if I call him to inquire when he is coming back home , he replies with "I don't know but eat o.. don't wait for me "...

How about the sex life ... What use to be mind blowing sex is now just average .just because he's had too much if it ..I could also say the same about me..I mean before seeing my husband in boxers turns me on but now even if he's naked it doesn't seem to move me

Hmmm but regardless I still love my husband. .I have sat him down many times and talked about spicing things up but you know Men... Anyways the moral of my story is that when you marry ..marry someone that even when he/she changes you would still love them because trust me they will....
.


What you failed to realize is that everything in life, apart from spiritual matters must and will ecounter the law of diminishing returns.

It's not that you and your husband don't love each other. You too do. But your love must face the law, and bow to it.

However, there are loopholes in every law.
So that means there is a way to ginger the love between you two and make it spiced up.
It works differently for each couple.

For some couples, it's distance of a few weeks.
Not seeing each other now makes them realize what they've missed as absence makes the heart fonder.

For some it's a couple's gateway. Just you two, away from work or business. Just loving yourselves and falling in love again.

So decide which is best.
May God see and help you two come through. Amen

4 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by generationz(f): 11:46am On Mar 01, 2021
RealGboy:




Why not get married first before dishing out advice ?.... easy to just spit trash .... like all football fans saying a footballer should have passed the ball .... why not be on the pitch first


So which part are you screaming about? The first part where I only asked questions but you were quick to type your pre-thought out garbage or the other part where I called out for more awareness for intending couples on the issues of sex in marriage?

You people don't read and comprehend well, before screaming.
Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by Shokoloko(f): 11:56am On Mar 01, 2021
Uyi168:
..
And from her other thread about her dirty counsin, she claimed the counsin who is 28 was way other than her..
Meaning she should be around 24/25..and her son that was caught with hardcore porn in his phone is 17...

In all, is like she gave her at a very tender age of 7 or 8.

Nawa.
.

2 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by Uyi168: 12:02pm On Mar 01, 2021
Shokoloko:

.
..

Ok then.
Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by Nobody: 12:28pm On Mar 01, 2021
generationz:



While I agree that so many marriages are not what it seems to be on the outside (maybe 60%) any marriage that requires cheating to maintain the "happiness" is a farce.

There are many old people who still make love to each other.
Those old people understand the reality. We the young ones prefer to live in dreams, that is why we start seeking for comfort outside the moment feel a bit unhappy in our marriage.

2 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by Acidosis(m): 5:06pm On Mar 01, 2021
Don't you get bored with yourself sometimes while you were single?? Lol, the way you guys overestimate your expectations in marriage ehnnn.. somehow, you were living and loving a boring life before marriage but just 'cos you got married, you've suddenly derived a strange craving for merriment and everyday gist. grin

Don't go and be looking for what's not lost o. Life gets boring at some point; life gets boring as you age not because you're married. As far as you're not drifting apart to the extent you begin to doubt your love...you'll be fine.

If you like marry Nigeria's most famous talkative, gist partner or Mr world, NOTHING will change oo.

24 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by Nobody: 10:03pm On Mar 01, 2021
marriage scares the fuuuk outta me

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by drey076(m): 10:04pm On Mar 01, 2021
Lion26:
So.. What.. Should We Do.....

What are you trying too insinuate... The Dick Isn't Enough.. You want some more.. Right.. That Ain't Possible.. Must Be Kidding Hold Ya Tight... Or Else School Girls Will.... You Understand... Then You Will Cry The Hell Outta Here
fry banana
Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by baralatie(m): 10:05pm On Mar 01, 2021
Rhodaogunpeju:
I decided to write this because I have come to realize that Love can get boring..
.
I remember when I met my husband , he was such a Nice and handsome Man. I mean I already decided if he ask me out I will say yes from the first day I met him but I still made him beg and purse me for a whole year before finally accepting to date him ..

6 months after our relationship we got married. and our marriage was bliss , I married a friend , we have our downs and quarell but we always make up before we sleep because of the fact that we made it compulsory that we must have a family prayer Every night , we usually settle most of our fights during these prayers ..

But sometimes marriages can get boring , you have gisted all the entire gist ,talk about everything talkable till there is actually nothing to talk about,. Then the husband starts drifting away .maybe he's got a new friend or found a new love ...sometime this new love might not be a person ,For instance my husband new love is politics..He's always working and when he's home he is either watching the News on Tv and even when he tries to talk to me he will be like "Baby can you believe what kai muhammad said again"..

And I'm just sitting like who and what is my concern with lai muhammad?... Yet he doesn't see my reaction,he just continues to talk untill we fall asleep.i listen to him because I have to he is my husband.

The love flame was slowly wearing our ,I mean he no longer wants me to wait for him before I eat. .. if I call him to inquire when he is coming back home , he replies with "I don't know but eat o.. don't wait for me "...

How about the sex life ... What use to be mind blowing sex is now just average .just because he's had too much if it ..I could also say the same about me..I mean before seeing my husband in boxers turns me on but now even if he's naked it doesn't seem to move me

Hmmm but regardless I still love my husband. .I have sat him down many times and talked about spicing things up but you know Men... Anyways the moral of my story is that when you marry ..marry someone that even when he/she changes you would still love them because trust me they will....
.
I have a question!
are you employed or an entrepreneur or a sit in the home housewife.

the answer will go a long way to solve the problem

3 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by firstratedcitiz(m): 10:08pm On Mar 01, 2021
"Before marriage, a man will stay awake all night thinking about something you said. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish saying it."

17 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by ednut1(m): 10:08pm On Mar 01, 2021
Hmmmm nawa o

1 Like

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by Nobody: 10:09pm On Mar 01, 2021
NAIRALAND is becoming a TOTAL DISGRACE AND DISAPPOINTMENT LIKE NIGERIAN GOVERNMENT....

inconsistency is the order of the day.
Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by naturefellow(m): 10:12pm On Mar 01, 2021
FreeSpirited:
Guys, When you want to date married women, women who are like 5 to10yrs above in marriage are the most vulnerable to fall into your trap. Many times they crave attention..or are just bored of their husband.
.
It's not gainsay when they say the first 5 to 7 years is the most turbulent in marriage that can break or make a marriage.
.
The story this young woman detailed above is a typical cycle of almost all marriages. The point our OP finds herself, for an average lady, after trying to endure or make things work will just succumb to the pressure of guys out there...and before u say jack..smart bold guys are already pounding her pvssy with all alacrity.. It's natural these days.. especially if you are in the business of chyking/chopping married women. You will know this.
.
It's only a matter of time if nothing is done before this woman starts riding the BBC of a guy who gives her attention and tickle her fancy...Naso e dey start...Nothing new.
.
That's why to me, fidelity in marriage is overrated..cos most times couples have broken their vow long before their significant other realises.
But in her situation, some women will deliberately go out and give in to the advances of their admirer just to kill boredom, depression and feel happy. To hell with marital vows..women do this most times to be Happy. However, the smart ones still find a way to balance home demand by not making it affect the integrity of the marriage...what they do is just flow with the marriage and not stress too much for the attention of their busy husband since he's not ready to be disturbed.
.
In thesame vein, the busy husband most times is also somewhere cheating with a university or polytechnic slayqueen cos he's also bored of her wife....That's the paradox of marriage.
.
You see... cheating on both sides maintains the marriage and happiness of both party codedly. Argue with me all you care...that's the reality..
Meanwhile, the stupid couples when they start the cheating game, they transfer the bottled anger and aggression on their partner which usually cause breakup......While the coded smart ones maintain their marriage and we keep praising and complimenting their marriage as the best thing that ever happened since Adam and Eve.
May God give us wisdom in all we do.
this long essay to justify infidelity? E long pass the original one sef

6 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by naturefellow(m): 10:17pm On Mar 01, 2021
justosee:

but you are an advocate of cheating to make marriage a happy and a long lasting one? or you don't understand the nonsense you wrote there.
don't mind him!

They'll mostly share the sensational aspect of infidelity. Not the consequences which are fatal sometimes.

2 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by BLoomfrancs(m): 10:20pm On Mar 01, 2021
The sad truth still remains that married women are the easiest to be f ucked. What I say, I say out of experience.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by KevMitnick: 10:21pm On Mar 01, 2021
Danhoys:
I could totally relate to you dear op, but I'm sure we're the lucky ones.

First of all, you married someone you love, someone you find both romantically and sexually attractive.

That's a plus.

When I and my hubby were passing through this turbulent phase, what helped was having similar interest.

I'm hugely into politics, and so is my husband. Trust me, there is always something to gist on when he's back from work.

Aside from politics, we're both hardcore gamers too, and we're already saving to get PS4, and it doesn't stop us from giving our young kids the attention they deserve.

Aside that, we both have huge interest in other areas too, like science. There is always something to talk about.

I've always love men who are built, and my husband knows this.

Every weekend, we go running, and we help each stay fit. Sometimes I teases him that he should be a model, and I do take alluring pictures of him too.

I'm a super intelligent lady, (not bragging), so I ensured that my husband's intellect matched with mine before saying 'I do!'

We've been married for 5 years now, and the love and fun is still there. During leave, we always make it a duty to travel to another state, and see an interesting place.

A week vacation doesn't hurt, and it has a way to rekindle the love we have for each other.

When you marry your friend, you discover that your love is new every morning lol.

Work and children can't steal love away, that's an excuse people give to avoid talking about how they no longer find their partner attractive or interesting.

I don't want to talk about sex, cause ours is on a whole new level. Sex shouldn't be the traditional offing of light and missionary thrusting.

That's boring!!! It needs spicing every time or it becomes boring and a chore.

I wouldn't like to go into details, before some religious folks label us sinners.

You have work to do, and I'm sure you've gotten a cue from my write up. Wishing you more bliss in marriage.

You are not only intelligent, you are also wise...I like how you steer the ship of your marriage. I wish the ladies reading this thread will learn a thing or two from you including the Op.

2 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by baralatie(m): 10:21pm On Mar 01, 2021
naturefellow:
don't mind him!

They'll mostly share the sensational aspect of infidelity. Not the consequences which are fatal sometimes.

2 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by byinks(f): 10:21pm On Mar 01, 2021
Paxxcarl:
marriage scares the fuuuk outta me

If you're a man, it should.

It's a healthy fear. grin

5 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by Nobody: 10:22pm On Mar 01, 2021
Rhodaogunpeju:
I decided to write this because I have come to realize that Love can get boring..
.
I remember when I met my husband , he was such a Nice and handsome Man. I mean I already decided if he ask me out I will say yes from the first day I met him but I still made him beg and purse me for a whole year before finally accepting to date him ..

6 months after our relationship we got married. and our marriage was bliss , I married a friend , we have our downs and quarell but we always make up before we sleep because of the fact that we made it compulsory that we must have a family prayer Every night , we usually settle most of our fights during these prayers ..

But sometimes marriages can get boring , you have gisted all the entire gist ,talk about everything talkable till there is actually nothing to talk about,. Then the husband starts drifting away .maybe he's got a new friend or found a new love ...sometime this new love might not be a person ,For instance my husband new love is politics..He's always working and when he's home he is either watching the News on Tv and even when he tries to talk to me he will be like "Baby can you believe what kai muhammad said again"..

And I'm just sitting like who and what is my concern with lai muhammad?... Yet he doesn't see my reaction,he just continues to talk untill we fall asleep.i listen to him because I have to he is my husband.

The love flame was slowly wearing our ,I mean he no longer wants me to wait for him before I eat. .. if I call him to inquire when he is coming back home , he replies with "I don't know but eat o.. don't wait for me "...

How about the sex life ... What use to be mind blowing sex is now just average .just because he's had too much if it ..I could also say the same about me..I mean before seeing my husband in boxers turns me on but now even if he's naked it doesn't seem to move me

Hmmm but regardless I still love my husband. .I have sat him down many times and talked about spicing things up but you know Men... Anyways the moral of my story is that when you marry ..marry someone that even when he/she changes you would still love them because trust me they will....
.


Eeeehhn? Rhoda so my prick is no longer enough for you abi? You want to start collecting away prick fa? And you come on Nairaland to humiliate me in-front of these small boys and girls abi? No wahala. See you at home tonight after I finish this last trophy with pepper soup.

2 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by kaymart: 10:25pm On Mar 01, 2021
OnlyDeCapPlease:


That is why I say marriage is a scam. Everything about marriage is rigged towards failure.

You share the same room with someone day in day out

You see them shltting

You hear them farting

You hear them burping

You see them sick

You see all their nasty personal habbits

You see them when they are weak

You see them crying

You see the 'other side' of them

You see them naked, and as they relax in the marriage and add some weight, You see the hanging belly, boobs/man boobs, stretch marks etc

You see their early morning face, early morning toh toh or preeq, that no one else sees.

You see all their vulnerabilities

As our people say "you don see them finish" aka "familiarity breeds contempt"

On top of all that, you will have quarreled severally and said very hurtful things that nobody else (including your mama or papa) had ever said to you.

Na so so curse you go dey curse am for you mind "Hello darling" but your mind will say "useless man" or "lazy woman".

One day you go just look the man/woman and ask yourself "how did I end up here with this thing?"

Meanwhile one guy outside, who only sees the finished product (make up on point, waist trainer activated and wig in place) will be eying your wife. Or one babe outside who only sees oga with power dressing activated inside nice car will be eying your husband.

Marriage na scam. But you could still get lucky though
so, what's the solution?
to.havw separate rooms?
Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by Kylekent59: 10:25pm On Mar 01, 2021
Many are rushing into marriage because their friends are married or because they think they are old enough to have gotten married. That was how a neighbor to a friend of mine was in a haste to get married of which she eventually did, but now, it's the worst mistake she ever did.


The plain truth is that not every marriage is blissful. One thing I like about myself: I don't rush things.

11 Likes

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by baralatie(m): 10:27pm On Mar 01, 2021
slyfoxxjoe:



Eeeehhn? Rhoda so my prick is no longer enough for you abi? You want to start collecting away prick fa? And you come on Nairaland to humiliate me in-front of these small boys and girls abi? No wahala. See you at home tonight after I finish this last trophy with pepper soup.
na the foundation of love shallow o!
if we borrow the parable of the sower of Jesus Christ.

if love is seed.then it goes like this

some love are dropped on the hard ground .the birds of the air come and eat it and fly away

some love fell in the earth but because of sun and stone it sprite up and withers easily

and so on

1 Like

Re: Love Is not always sweet .. 7 years marriage experience by TemmyT002(m): 10:33pm On Mar 01, 2021
Danhoys:
I could totally relate to you dear op, but I'm sure we're the lucky ones.

First of all, you married someone you love, someone you find both romantically and sexually attractive.

That's a plus.

When I and my hubby were passing through this turbulent phase, what helped was having similar interest.

I'm hugely into politics, and so is my husband. Trust me, there is always something to gist on when he's back from work.

Aside from politics, we're both hardcore gamers too, and we're already saving to get PS4, and it doesn't stop us from giving our young kids the attention they deserve.

Aside that, we both have huge interest in other areas too, like science. There is always something to talk about.

I've always love men who are built, and my husband knows this.

Every weekend, we go running, and we help each stay fit. Sometimes I teases him that he should be a model, and I do take alluring pictures of him too.

I'm a super intelligent lady, (not bragging), so I ensured that my husband's intellect matched with mine before saying 'I do!'

We've been married for 5 years now, and the love and fun is still there. During leave, we always make it a duty to travel to another state, and see an interesting place.

A week vacation doesn't hurt, and it has a way to rekindle the love we have for each other.

When you marry your friend, you discover that your love is new every morning lol.

Work and children can't steal love away, that's an excuse people give to avoid talking about how they no longer find their partner attractive or interesting.

I don't want to talk about sex, cause ours is on a whole new level. Sex shouldn't be the traditional offing of light and missionary thrusting.

That's boring!!! It needs spicing every time or it becomes boring and a chore.

I wouldn't like to go into details, before some religious folks label us sinners.

You have work to do, and I'm sure you've gotten a cue from my write up. Wishing you more bliss in marriage.


Wow. A female gamer.
Very very rare.
Your husband is damn lucky

4 Likes

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