pafo:
I really wish this is some hogwash kinda story but if not, I'm really vexed right now. The only thing I tell people like you is to fins the nearest highway and keep f v c king off. You are mad!

Exactly. The op is really mad.

May your God also reveal to you to return all the monies and sex you collected from him when he was supporting you through school.

You were brought up by Catholic parents will you disown them too?

Mumulism in the name of Christianity!

I know many penticostal girls who have left their churches to marry Chatholic guys.

mugnmuffin:
Dear Nairalanders,
I have an issue that has been on my mind for weeks now. My fiancé and I have been dating for over three years. I love him and he loves me too. We are physically attracted to each other. We’re both catholic but since I graduated, during my service year I gave my life to Christ, got saved and left the Catholic Church. So I’ve been a Pentecostal Christian since then. He on the other hand is still catholic. I subtly try to nudge him to consider getting saved, i.e acknowledging Christ as lord and savior and becoming born again but he is content with his laidback Christian life.

Earlier this year, he asked to meet my parents and I let him. My parents like him especially because my younger sis is married and they have been waiting for me too. They’re glad I’ve someone. However, after the introduction,I regret it. I’m now certain that he’s not the one. I think about my spiritual life and how lukewarm he is about the things of God, I think about kids and how we’ll raise the, with such differing views about God and I’m discouraged. I feel like I’m settling because he checks all the boxes on the checklist of physical attributes. Another mistake I made is, I didn’t pray about this decision and that worries me because anything that involves him,I just act with pausing to ask God, but I always ask God about other aspects of my life. So it’s like my associating with him is a minus for my spiritual life and that’s a huge cause for concern.

At this point, I want to tell my parents I am not convinced it’s him but I’m afraid of the disappointment this will cause. *sigh* I’ll appreciate your thoughts, comments, criticisms...

Got saved!!! This is the biggest disrespect I've ever seen. Most of these private jet churches just enjoy throwing jabs at Catholic Church and we don't even care if they exist or not. Try this your nonsense with Islam and see what will be left of you. Practice which ever form of Christianity you want without playing down Catholic Church but people have done in the past and still the organization still remains. If Catholics have time to criticize some of these business ventures you compare with Catholicism, you know nothing will be left out them. If you're encouraged by your pastors to write nonsense about Catholics you better stop because you'll never get anything good from.

How can you take a giant decision of your life and you didn't ask God about it? ,go ask God first, don't mind all this people asking if he his not serving same God u serve...... Ask God first,it's better to be late in marriage than you having a broken home in your life.....upls ask God first..,...

Blakjewelry:

Surprise, surprise e no get wetin person no go see. It's annoying when you see a Christian look another Christian as inferior. the question is who is the judge in this her case

The problem is that some businessmen sorry "men of God" have arrogated to themselves the position of "assistant God" and my people are blindly following.

eeewise:
Many will bash and insult you here because of your write up(catholics vs pentecostal). Besides very few can relate with what you wrote considering there is a general "hatred" for pentecostal pastors here.

My opinion is not to rush a decision as big as marriage when in doubt.


If he is not truly saved ( some Catholics are saved) call it off immediately without battling an eye lid


Align with the wisdom of the word ( don't be unequally yoked with unbelievers)

Don't be intimidating by comments here. If he is not born again ( which is irrespective of being a Catholic or pentecostal) drop him. If he is but isn't spiritual enough then I will say pray again and postpone wedding dates for clarity

Pls shut it already. Who told you the lady is saved and the man not saved? And BTW, nobody hates pentacostals here. It's rather peoctacostals attacking Catholics just like the idiaaat lady did

binary007:
You dated for 3 years and you are just getting convinced that he isn't the one after introduction?

That's how spiritual problem starts soon they would tell her she's got marine husband....

Chaaaaaiiiiiii...wetin Buhari no go see for zoo? Lolz

PrimeWatermark:
Hehehehehehehe
Is that all?

Don't worry, you'll soon jam a wolf in sheep's clothing. Then you'll know how far.

It's not even as if the man is a traditionalist, atheist or pagan.
Creating a problem where there is none. Let them be decieving you with 'Do not be unequally yoked'.

Religion shaa

Some traditionalists, atheist are even better than most so called Christians these days.

mugnmuffin:
Dear Nairalanders,
I have an issue that has been on my mind for weeks now. My fiancé and I have been dating for over three years. I love him and he loves me too. We are physically attracted to each other. We’re both catholic but since I graduated, during my service year I gave my life to Christ, got saved and left the Catholic Church. So I’ve been a Pentecostal Christian since then. He on the other hand is still catholic. I subtly try to nudge him to consider getting saved, i.e acknowledging Christ as lord and savior and becoming born again but he is content with his laidback Christian life.

Earlier this year, he asked to meet my parents and I let him. My parents like him especially because my younger sis is married and they have been waiting for me too. They’re glad I’ve someone. However, after the introduction,I regret it. I’m now certain that he’s not the one. I think about my spiritual life and how lukewarm he is about the things of God, I think about kids and how we’ll raise the, with such differing views about God and I’m discouraged. I feel like I’m settling because he checks all the boxes on the checklist of physical attributes. Another mistake I made is, I didn’t pray about this decision and that worries me because anything that involves him,I just act with pausing to ask God, but I always ask God about other aspects of my life. So it’s like my associating with him is a minus for my spiritual life and that’s a huge cause for concern.

At this point, I want to tell my parents I am not convinced it’s him but I’m afraid of the disappointment this will cause. *sigh* I’ll appreciate your thoughts, comments, criticisms...

Young lady, I will give you this advice for free. Don't marry him. Let your parents be disappointed for all it's worth. I say this for the simple reason that the difference in your spirituality that's presently giving you cause for concern may eventually kill the union if you go ahead. You don't marry someone just on the level of physical attraction. Many people have said so much on this already, take this advice. Though, you can marry him if you intend to lower your spiritual expectation and growth. The decision is yours

mugnmuffin:
Dear Nairalanders,
I have an issue that has been on my mind for weeks now. My fiancé and I have been dating for over three years. I love him and he loves me too. We are physically attracted to each other. We’re both catholic but since I graduated, during my service year I gave my life to Christ, got saved and left the Catholic Church. So I’ve been a Pentecostal Christian since then. He on the other hand is still catholic. I subtly try to nudge him to consider getting saved, i.e acknowledging Christ as lord and savior and becoming born again but he is content with his laidback Christian life.

Earlier this year, he asked to meet my parents and I let him. My parents like him especially because my younger sis is married and they have been waiting for me too. They’re glad I’ve someone. However, after the introduction,I regret it. I’m now certain that he’s not the one. I think about my spiritual life and how lukewarm he is about the things of God, I think about kids and how we’ll raise the, with such differing views about God and I’m discouraged. I feel like I’m settling because he checks all the boxes on the checklist of physical attributes. Another mistake I made is, I didn’t pray about this decision and that worries me because anything that involves him,I just act with pausing to ask God, but I always ask God about other aspects of my life. So it’s like my associating with him is a minus for my spiritual life and that’s a huge cause for concern.

At this point, I want to tell my parents I am not convinced it’s him but I’m afraid of the disappointment this will cause. *sigh* I’ll appreciate your thoughts, comments, criticisms...

PRAY

DAramis:


To the best of my knowledge, this seems to be false. Linda ikeji baptised his son despite the fact she is not married nor the child gotten inside wedlock.

I'm very sorry if it's false. Please I stand to be corrected because It's been long I left the Church ( 2001). And i was still small then. so, can't really remember so many things but I know there was a time someone was not allowed to do somethings because they didn't wed in cburch or so..

Anyways, I withdraw that statement.

This is my brotherly advice. You are meant to ask God first before you take the step accepting to marry him , but you allow the physical attraction to over shadow you . Another thing is that if both of you have been having sex then that's medicine after death God can not tell u if his the one or not . So my advice is if you are sexually involve stop it and seek for forgiveness then pray and fast to ask God to show you who to marry. I'm sure God will reveal whatever is hidden to you and show you your Man . Please don't go ahead with marriage . A failed marriage is equal to hell fire and who you marry determines the fulfilment of your destiny. Stay blessed

Rocktation:


This is why people leave the church. It's because they don't understand her doctrines. How could you have be born and raised as catholic and yet utter such falsehood?

I'm very sorry if it's false. Please I stand to be corrected because It's been long I left the Church ( 2001). And i was still small then. so, can't really remember so many things but I know there was a time someone was not allowed to do somethings because they didn't wed in church or so..

Anyways, I withdraw that statement.

Nigerians.....more religious than God. You can't be perfect. Common sense is not common. You want to shit you pray, you want to cook you pray, you want to work you pray, you want to wash clothes you pray, haba!!!...if he makes you happy you better go and marry him and stop all this shenanigans.

U have a mental problem that requires immediate response to. U got saved my foot ( u got brainwashed) it's better u quit that young man b4 making his life miserable

multiple4u:
You are not being honest here. Deep inside you, you know there is more to this.

Let's do some analysis here:
1. You have been with him for 3 years, yet that's not enough for you to know if he's the one or not.

2. All of a sudden, you gave your life to Jesus. You didn't take him with you when you were giving your life to Jesus. You said you made a mistake by not praying about it at first. Are you referring to the time you have not given your life to Jesus or are you referring to now that you have given your life to Jesus? The time frame is not adding up because if you said you should have prayed about it at the beginning, was it the time you are still non-Christian because that means you shouldn't have prayed anyways or you don't know what prayer is at that time.

3. You are saying that catholics are not real Christians because you are now a non member. That's so childish.

4. Is your bf a chief priest? What made you think he is not the one just because he's a catholic. You think you are better than the guy. Such a shallow mind.

You are just looking for an excuse to try the new guy That's all over your Dm. This new guy is making you LOL. You lover his fancy, you just like that he's vibrant. His is bringing something new into your life. You think your bf is just not meeting up. We all love new stuff, but every thing gets old my dear.

Women sha. Good luck the new guy. Hopefully you won't change your mind on him too.

Very correct.
Two things are involved
Either one bro Mattew have started turning her head with evangelism or Pastor Mike have added salt to her Pentecostal brain with midnight praying things.

If only this young man is a Nairalander, he would have seen things for himself and zoomed, e get why

Hmmmm, Africa mentality with church and self righteousness and holiness. Am facing the same issue with the girl I met about a year ago, she love me so much at start, I discussed about me marring her which she agreed and we met with her parents, she came to my village to meet with my mom but at some point things changed, I asked her what was going on, she said if she has to marry me, I have to be a deeper life member and i keep asking myself this question, what makes a man a child of God or a righteous man, is it by church or his personal relationship with God.

But wait oo! Why are people like this in this country? Someone you have known for 4yrs? You have no other complain about the person except religious differences? You about to make the biggest mistake of your life by considering quiting the relationship. You better think twice before you become married to Jesus when you have clocked 40+ and yet to find the brother on fire.

You’re actually the red flag, sister.
Why?
You changed your faith AFTER being engaged.

Raalsalghul:
Can someone tell what the red flags are?

She is the red flag here. But as usual this gender always like to turn things around to make them look like the victim. I pity the man.

Na the guy I pity for getting involved with a religious nutjob. I hope that he sees this post and dumps your sorry ass.

zed7:
If your only complaint is that he isn't a fanatic then you have no problem.
A well behaved moralist is better off than a religious fanatic without morals.

One pastor has seen vision for her. That's how they go about deceiving young ladies. Sometimes, I see Christianity as a religion of hate. Christians so hate themselves. Just imagine the nonsense she said ' I have seen the light and a born again'. All these yahoo yahoo prosperity teaching pastors steadily cashing out on gullible brainwashed fickle faith Christians. If you like be deceived and lose your fiance. The pastor who is more yoked and a born again will marry you.

Marriage is a serious business which we can't rush into with pity. If you've noticed he is not born again and not ready to change, it's better not to go in because there's a more serious Marriage than what we have on earth. Pray through and allow God guide you

My thought though she feel she is a better Christian. Abeg don't be over religious and loose the right man based on your religious beliefs[quote author=Blakjewelry post=103009524]
Surprise, surprise e no get wetin person no go see. It's annoying when you see a Christian look another Christian as inferior. the question is who is the judge in this her case[

ikorodureporta:


All the things you listed here are general human problem irrespective of their religious faith.
If you know both of you are no longer compatible, simply end the sht. & Stop looking at his church as an excuse..

She is a very cunning creature, who will be causing problems and still appear as innocent
If this is main reason as she claimed, why putting issue of denomination as main in first instant, I said it B4 she came back to further justified her stance, that she is a type who has gone far in relationship with one guy but she met another better man now, she wants to justify herself by quiting the relationship

eseh1:
I dunno if you will see this msg...but if you feel you are not comfortable with the decision pls call of d engagement or put it on hold...i wish i did same even wen on d marriage day i felt like...didn't want to disappoint any1.

Many people don't understand this.

If something tells you not to, you better listen to it. Many who ignore that misgiving tend to live miserably afterwards.

Even something as small as religious differences. A Catholic isn't a Pentecostal and a Pentecostal isn't a Catholic. It can be a big deal later.

So madam what ur trying to say is that being a catholic doesn't make u saved or Catholics are inferior or aren't christians right? I don't know y d guys hasn't dumped ur useless ass.I pity him in advance if he eventually marries u.Ur a hypocrite.

Vision101:
Op. Don't mind those that have been condemning your suspicion as a result of imbalance in your Christian standard with your fiance. Marriage is a serious business. It's a life time decision. For a true Christian it's for life.

We always advice intending couples to pray and seek divine direction. God must be first.
It's dangerous for a fervent Christian to marry a church goer. It will affect the spiritual and moral upbringing of the children and the family.

It's not about denomination. Within the Catholics there are fervent ones. Is he one of them? A man is supposed to be the head of the family and by implication the pastor of the family. This is the perfect setting.

What I have discovered from experience is that in most homes today the women shoulder the spiritual burden of families. This is because most of the women did not do what you want to do now. As pastor I have observed that majority of the marriages are being managed. What is still holding them is either the children, what the society will say or desire of one partner not to be out of marriage.

I

May God guide you.

God bless you for saying the truth.

The only grouse most people have with her post is because she said he's catholic that's all. If she had just said he's not born again and goes to church they won't be this outraged.

Mugnmuffin if you know what's good for you better find out time to find the reason why you are uneasy,in fact you already know deep inside , introduction no be marriage oooo, the person you marry should be your spiritual head.

Women mostly carry this spiritual burden
nowadays( which is wrong) because they didn't marry Spirit filled men, you will be acting as covering for your family while the man who is supposed to be the priest of the home is nonchallant about God. When the storms of life come you will understand, when both of you are fervent you can weather the storms together.


Many have gone, don't be among the number.

Bola146:
I don't really get your points. Which God? Is he worshipping something else?! Seriously I don't get it. Maybe you should ask yourself what is causing the confusion

I support above comment. There is no perfection In marriage. Search your soul to know what is giving you cold feet.

What you stated here are valid reasons to consider whether or not a person is suitable for you. Cheating, suppression of your potential for growth should be a game killer. But that a person is not religious enough should not be a consideration. I am more wary of people that are religious than people who are guided by morals.

mugnmuffin:


First, I want to apologize for the statement insinuating that Catholic Christians are less Christian compared to Pentecostals. That was not meant to be a generalization. The reason why faith is my principal concern is because, as a Christian, there are certain ethics and codes of conduct a person adopts and practices that guide their actions and decisions. It is the crux of the matter for me.

Many of the comments are asking for elaboration especially with regards to other aspects besides spirituality. Some of the red flags in terms of his attitude and behavior that give me cause for concern are how he relates with ladies; I found that he cheated on me a couple of times. Some of my friends who are married assure me that it is nothing to worry about because “men will always be men”. However, I feel like overlooking that means ‘settling’. Also, he tends to act like we’re competing for career success. I’m a banker and he works with a company and is well paid. From comments he makes when I make attempts to pursue growth, like take courses or attend conferences to network, his response shows that he thinks it’s a waste of time and resources. I don’t always expect him to give me financial support, even if encouragement. But he feels I should be content with my current status. It scares me that he may staunch my progress after marriage.
I’m no saint myself, but I know marriage is a lifetime affair and just because I didn’t look before I leaped into the relationship doesn’t mean I shouldn’t at this point try to make amends.

You are the problem and not the born again thing ...

I am sure the church giving you this kind of idea must be one of the mushroom church with a fresh graduate from the university...

You are confused and i hope that young man dump you now and choose another life ...


Don’t let those Pentecostal new pastor cajoled you into something you will regret for life ...



You are the one with the RED FLAGS....