Divoc19:
For a marriage to last long there has to be submission especially from the wife to the husband. Someone has to always play the fool.

Not entirely true at all. A marriage is an agreement between a man and woman, like a sort of business. For a business to thrive, all partners simply need to be in agreement and compromise when necessary. No one partner has to continually cave in to the others for any set reason except that agreed upon.

If you ask me, mutual respect wins hands down over submission any day.

Nothin.
My younger self would not believe what my older self would have to say anyways.

Never marry from a family where there is no love among them.

Don't marry from the family that carry traditions for head like punk

Don't marry from entitled family

Don't end up with a partner who is lazy.

Limit your friendship

Don't go into marriage full of expectations if you don't want to be disappointed.

Dont stop learning.

Put Your Trust In God

I've learnt so much

rickleye:
Nothin.
My younger self would not believe what my older self would have to say anyways.

ROFLMAO


You said it !

Mariangeles:


Your wife go don hear nwiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!

I made it easier for others to read. You're welcome.

Smh...Somebody dished out advise, una want change am for him...Which one is nwiiiiii

He stated guidelines married women should observe...Especially the part a woman shouldn't get involved in convo...If not invited...And the food aspect..I mean our mothers understand these things perfectly.

But we are in a woke generation sha God help us.

bukatyne:


Are you male or female?

Bukatyne You are welcome to this discussion. Awaiting your intelligent contribution as usual.

But you know our reality.
You are only talking about what is suppose to be. And I am talking about our reality and countless sacrifices people have made for marriage sake

Kobojunkie:
Not entirely true at all. A marriage is an agreement between a man and woman, like a sort of business. For a business to thrive, all partners simply need to be in agreement and compromise when necessary. No one partner has to continually cave in to the others for any set reason except that agreed upon.

Munzy14:

Onye ahu eji hu ahu...I am surprised people still quote him/her.

I nukwa there's nothing Christian about marriage?

UyaiIncomparabl:


Age doesn't maturity, Franchas. This thing is different strokes for different folks.

Most times maturity comes with life experiences and exposure, and such experiences can mostly be gained with time (age).



So age most times matters.



The younger a girl is, the more she chases after frivolous qualities of men like height, body build, and other crazy qualities. But as she grows and encounter life and get more exposed, she starts to realize that life is beyond those crazy girlie fantasies she built her dream man on.

Munzy14:

Smh...Somebody dished out advise, una want change am for him...Which one is nwiiiiii

He stated guidelines married women should observe...Especially the part a woman shouldn't get involved in convo...If not invited...And the food aspect..I mean our mothers understand these things perfectly.

But we are in a woke generation sha God help us.

He seems more like a commander-in-chief than a husband.
Ebere m e mere nwunye ya.

Basics007:
Make sure the person you marry has someone he/she listens to. Don`t marry a loose canon

word

Divoc19:
But you know our reality.
You are only talking about what is suppose to be. And I am talking about our reality and countless sacrifices people have made for marriage sake

Reality is that people choose what they allow or do not allow. No one can force submission on another. You ether allow it or you don't. And if you realize that a partner is suddenly leaning towards it, you still have right to chose to stay or run for dear life.

I don't believe in making silly sacrifices for the sake of marriage. Divorce is not a sin so I chose to see it as an exit plan provided by the Almighty Himself from the foolishness of our decisions in marriage.

Let God be at the center of it all.

That's all.

It is only God that will determine where it will end.

Forget about the handsomeness, forget about the beauty, forget about the body, forget about the degree or certificate, forget about the deceitfulness of money.

Focus on God.


Please, God, give us more Christian home in Jesus name I pray Amen.

toobusy:
.... would have loved to know more about you,have you got a younger sibling,

Be careful before some overzealous dirty minded people will accuse you of wanting do something nasty with a married woman.

I have been there before.

Mariangeles:
I nukwa there's nothing Christian about marriage?

That is what Jesus Christ Himself, the Christ in the word Christian told you over 2000 years ago when He said your marriage is of this world(unholy) and not of the Kingdom of God(Christian).

So this fight you have here isn't against me but against Christ Himself..

Babygirl, don’t what you see on social media about men been scum get into your head.
There’s a handsome with a good heart out there for you as long as you are true to your.

#marriage isn’t that bad and all men are not scum#

God2man2again:

Please, God, give us more Christian home in Jesus name I pray Amen.

There is no such a thing as a Christian home either - Matthew 10 vs 34 - 38

franchasofficia:
Most times maturity comes with life experiences and exposure, and such experiences can mostly be gained with time (age).



So age most times matter.



The younger a girl is, the more she chases after frivolous qualities of men like height, body build, and other crazy qualities. But as she grows and encounters life and gets more exposed, she starts to realize that life is beyond those crazy girlie fantasies she built her man on.

It would interest you to know that the mature women in your use of context display their fair share of youthful exuberance. Well, I can only speak for myself, though. I am not 27 yet, but I am nowhere near immature or whatever you define under 27-year-olds to be.

But then, I get your context.

JovialJune:
Don't marry Nigerian boys

LMAO �����

Angela62:
I am married for about a decade now, and I am enjoying my marriage. Honestly, if the worse happens and I became a widow, I will not marry any other man, I will train my kids alone. That is how much I love my husband and cherish my marriage. Since childhood, I have always been close to my grandmother, I grew up with her since my mum died when I was a child. I learned a lot from her. I can still remember the advice she gave to me when I wanted to marry my husband, and I will tell you exactly that.

1. Look at the qualities and characters of the man you want to marry. Most ''shine shine'' men, as my grandma will put it are not the real men. `Just as sugar is sweet but unhealthy, lots of men are like that. That bricklayer that sends his mum money in the village every month, that doesn't go to a club, doesn't smoke and buy expensive designers, he might not even give you butterflies, those are the real men. Ten years from now when you are pregnant with your third child, his masculinity will be like an umbrella to protect, provide and be the best father for your kids.

But you see those ones that are doing fine boys only, care more about the phone they use and the girl they sleep with this weekend than their future, those you must avoid. They may be attractive now, but when the difficulties of marriage come especially financially, then you realize that truly, internal beauty (characters and virtues) is what keeps marriage. So do not sacrifice the future due to your youthful exuberance.

2. Look at his patterns, those are the secrets to his future and of course, your future. Does he wakes up and go to work every day? What is the relationship he has with his family? How does he handle stress? is he hardworking? Do people around him respect him? Where does he go after work? What is your assessment of his friends? `What are his goals? etc. You might be clouded with feelings with this assessment especially when you are in love, so you might ask people you trust for advice. I saw this thread some few years ago by pansophist, where he wrote about qualities you should look for in a man for marriage, I implore you to check it out. The guy is on point. As I read through it, I kept nodding my head in affirmation because my husband easily covered all these qualities.

https://www.nairaland.com/6257463/part-two-traits-woman-should

Also when I first met my husband, I wasn't that interested. He appears so ordinary (if you know what I mean), but as I scratch further, the depth of his manliness opens up. I was not attracted at first, but everything fell into place, and I was glad I didn't just brush him away. But I couldn't see his qualities quickly, it was my grandma that pointed it all out. So you should really have someone older, that have walked the talk of marriage, to advise and guide you.

3. Support him. Men are at their best when their wive are supportive. For example, my husband never asks me about my income, but every of my penny goes to my household. The idea that a man has to carry all the financial responsibilities is a self-defeating adventure. Such a woman punishes herself due to her short-sightedness and selfishness by reducing her worth in his eyes, making her easily replaceable.

[font=Lucida Sans Unicode][/font]

You are just on point and this 3rd point of yours nailed it all. Imagine somebody's telling you to your face, that your money is ours and my money is mine and also acting same??

rickleye:
Nothin.
My younger self would not believe what my older self would have to say anyways.

Advise anyway.

I'll tell my younger self to write jamb in 2009 and get admitted into Delsu geology and pay a rent at Peace Park hostel, River Road. That's where he'll find the most beautiful, smart and loving girl that he'll one day marry.

Nigerians like to preach Sha ....hope they practice all this things all I hear here is how perfect my husband is
How good my wife is
They said what advice would you.give your younger self what have
u learnt in marriage about marital relationship with a man or a woman

Acidosis:





How's my oga, Munzy

your curiousity...sha..

ahnie:

I m still trying hard to find out exactly what your problem is!

Aswearugaaad

Lol. I'm tired of that dude or gal. Mehn I don't even know

Well, for me, a month ago I woulda said I'm not gon' get married. I understand female nature and know that marriage is not a bed of roses. I know we say there are no unicorns and all, but I met one. A very good Christian girl.

We got very close but it was never sexual - Only a hint that this would lead to marriage or not. She was a virgin and had never been in any relationship, and she was roughly my age. Well, I wasn't ready and now she's married.

Ever since, I see what our girls are up to in real life, on instagram, and jumping on every immoral and satanic challenges on tiktok, and I think "P would never do this." These girls are not marriage material. I've dated quite a few and I'd never marry any of them.

But recently, I've started to get close to God again and I realized I have been limiting Him. I believe I shouldn't cancel the idea of marriage simply because it seems there are no worthy girls out there. I know God will send me another unicorn. This time I'll be ready cos He's been preparing me. I trust Him. So I'm a young guy who's on his purpose and no longer scared of getting married.

I dunno if this counts as advice. But it might help someone out there.

If possible marry someone from same tribe.

Don't marry anyone you're very much older than. Say up to ten or eleven years.

Don't allow your mother inlaw anywhere close to you home. If you have to, send her off within a week. You'll thank me later

Don't complain about your wife's short comings in her mother's presence. It make her do extra curriculum Waka Waka for ya mata.

Latsly, don't believe in love . Love na scam

Respect ur man, Love ur wife.
Have sense
Don't stop improving on urself.
Don't loose urself in marriage.
Have goals in marriage.
Work on ur marriage. Work on urself. Marriage is a journey not the end of the journey.
Marry the person who has/possess ur greatest values.
Support each other.
Know how to resolve major issues/Conflicts btwn urselves when dating so know how to handle them when married or else u will call 3rd parties tire.
Cook Good food
keep the home clean.
Love ur inlaws the best u can.

Mariangeles:


He seems more like a commander-in-chief than a husband.
Ebere m e mere nwunye ya.

Commander-in-chief... finish him..lmao

He is dishing advise na..UNFILTERED..