Have you ever seen a potential FIL asking his SIL how much he earns or better still try to size his pockets up, the few introductions I've witnessed have always been about if the man is capable and responsible enough to lead the daughter in the union called marriage.

Seems there's always a clash of objectivity and realities once we are on social media high horse, years ago or so, a reputable Nairalander break it down in simple terms how he intend going about his marital life on a 5 figure salary, trust the out of touch with reality folks to threaten the man with all sort of negativity, yet the man stood his guns.

https://www.nairaland.com/4036175/30yrs-earn-35k-month-marry

That's the link, if I chop ban so be it.

Left to me, I'd advised the intending couple or those who want to go into relationship to go with intentions and clarity of purpose. And as a man, I dare to say this many men out there will never reveal their salary to their significant other if she wasn't there from the get go, na why, it's better to build together with your man and set out with intent (I pray hypergamy go gree some women sha) but hey this is my opinion.

Cc:
Donpata

P.S:
FIL: Father In Law
SIL: Son In Law

Rozross:
A thread was created by blessedmercy asking if it would be wise to settle down with a man that earns 100k and all she got was insults and jabs from guys, like seriously?

Should a guy who earns 100k think of marriage or how to double his hustle ? Why are most guys unrealistic, can 100k fend and cater for yourself alone.

Please I’ll want those who think it’s ok to come break it down for us on how the 100k will be managed monthly, I maybe learning a whole lot from this. Thanks

How much is your father earning

If I dey earn 100k and you think it's too small for us to manage for a start, I'm sorry you will go back to your mother house be that...because if Na 100k I dey earn for now and you are not ready to be supportive..na red card be that

Broke up with my ex..why?

I told her I want to marry her

She said she can't and her parents can't allow it,I asked her why,she said I live in a room and parlor self contain, and anyone who wants to marry her must live in a 3bedroom flat, I told her that 3bedroom is nothing less than 2million currently in my area,even room and parlor self contain is 800k per year... she said if I can't, den we should forget marriage that her father lives in 3bedroom, now the so called family left where they stayed in bariga and moved to alagbado where they stay in 3 rooms.. the rooms are not painted neither furnished well and she dey try compare with the dad.. omo I had to find my square root somewhere else...

What I'm trying to say is that, if you can't cope or stay with the person earning 100k,u move along and look for those earning what you want.....

Rozross:
A thread was created by blessedmercy asking if it would be wise to settle down with a man that earns 100k and all she got was insults and jabs from guys, like seriously?

Should a guy who earns 100k think of marriage or how to double his hustle ? Why are most guys unrealistic, can 100k fend and cater for yourself alone.

Please I’ll want those who think it’s ok to come break it down for us on how the 100k will be managed monthly, I maybe learning a whole lot from this. Thanks

You only have the right to ask this question if you earn up to that or more yourself. What’s wrong with people and planning on other people’s money? In a relationship, everyone should fend for themselves and partners can share occasional gifts and assistance.

Adults should earn their own monies and stop asking stupid questions like this.

Ebubu9:
how much do you bring to the table? He brings 100k

.bros. I think u should be caned. My gate man earn 40k and he has 4 children and the wife na full house wife. He his only prudent with spending

Rozross:
A thread was created by blessedmercy asking if it would be wise to settle down with a man that earns 100k and all she got was insults and jabs from guys, like seriously?

Should a guy who earns 100k think of marriage or how to double his hustle ? Why are most guys unrealistic, can 100k fend and cater for yourself alone.

Please I’ll want those who think it’s ok to come break it down for us on how the 100k will be managed monthly, I maybe learning a whole lot from this. Thanks

This Rozz aka Zzor aka Iyaebe with her trademark silly threads. Nonsense.

50k man do some women. 500k men no do some women. All these arguments are becoming stale..you can not set a gauge for finance in relationship or marriage. Make everybody find your level and rest.

PlayMaker14:
I can Take good care of a sensible woman, but I can't spend lavishly on her.

Taking good care of a woman is more than giving food and shelter. Hey, don't mind me. Maybe, I'm just a little too self-absorbed. Remember, standards differ. So, good luck.

detectivejones:
By their questions you know them. Women that want their husbands/boyfriends to give them the type of life their mother never had. The thing is why on earth would a woman with two hands, two legs and same brain depend totally on a man like an infant.

These two things are not mutually exclusive, it's not bad for a woman to want to have a good life, the problem is just that some of them have a sense of entitlement, not patient, don't want to work to support their husbands to have a good life.

I am sure if you had a daughter you would want her to marry a man that can take care of her and give her a good life or at least a hardworking man that aspires to improve his financial situation over time...with the woman putting in work of course, so it's not a bad thing for a woman to want a good life, generally speaking.

I said all of these cos even though some women might be no go area, statements like women want a life their mother never had is not right....our dads did the best they could, that they remained poor financially does not mean the daughters should not want more out of life.

Olalan:
Internet and fake living, you need to ask yourself how many people are gainfully employed in Nigeria? Majority of working class people earn below 100k monthly and yet marriages are conducted weekly.

If you like be waiting for a above 100k earner before starting a relationship......your eye go soon clear

Dont mind them. Ungrateful people. There are some couple who that 100k is like 600k. They earn below 100k and live in peace with children. Some have broken through and telling victorious stories how they started. Stop deceiving yourself. Except you want to hang your selves on transformer by living above your means. Stop fake life. Its no yet over you will get there and beyond

That is why they say a man's love to a woman is unconditional because here it is not about the woman's money but that of the woman is conditional because she will definitely expect money.If my hubby earns as much as 100k wow!I know Nigeria will turn to my paradise on earth but my beloved hubby earns below yet he is very generous with the little he has and I don't pick offence because I myself am a working class lady who do not wait for my Hubby's money before I take care of my kids.In a nutshell,Nigeria is hot now there is hardship everywhere any woman waiting for a man who earn above 100k before settling down here in this country should just enter Dubai to go and look for husband.

Rozross:
A thread was created by blessedmercy asking if it would be wise to settle down with a man that earns 100k and all she got was insults and jabs from guys, like seriously?

Should a guy who earns 100k think of marriage or how to double his hustle ? Why are most guys unrealistic, can 100k fend and cater for yourself alone.

Please I’ll want those who think it’s ok to come break it down for us on how the 100k will be managed monthly, I maybe learning a whole lot from this. Thanks

Let me educate your from the locals around [color=#006600][/color]

How many people even earn 100k per month in Nigeria. The truth is we are mostly carried away by our convenience than reality. I can say boldly 70 percent of employed Nigerians warn less than 50k per month.

detectivejones:
By their questions you know them. Women that want their husbands/boyfriends to give them the type of life their mother never had. The thing is why on earth would a woman with two hands, two legs and same brain depend totally on a man like an infant?

Also with a certificate.

I think parents should stop sending their daughters to school because it is useless.

It hasn't changed their mentality from ages.

Ladies Gentlemen and gentlemen, the mumu Zzor is back.

They can't marry guys who don't earn much but they can tie knots with Yahoo guys with no safe sources of income. When cash stops flowing in, they part ways and become single mothers. May God help the wise among our ladies.

[b][/b]

Rozross:
A thread was created by blessedmercy asking if it would be wise to settle down with a man that earns 100k and all she got was insults and jabs from guys, like seriously?

Should a guy who earns 100k think of marriage or how to double his hustle ? Why are most guys unrealistic, can 100k fend and cater for yourself alone.

Please I’ll want those who think it’s ok to come break it down for us on how the 100k will be managed monthly, I maybe learning a whole lot from this. Thanks

You will continue waiting, cos You will never be able to get the answer you seek. As it's relative.
Just allow that young man to go. So that you don't use this your narrative to give him sleepless nights then high blood pressure..
Don't worry, you will soon find a man that earns from 400k+ that wouldn't need a breakdown IRO monthly expenses. And I bet you ain't up to 28 or 30 yet.
It's alright.

How many Nigerian males of marriageable age earn 100k. How many females are of marriage able age for these men?

The answer to these two questions pretty much tells us life always finds a way. There is no manual.

Rozross:
Are there ladies out there not working for their money these days? What brought about this topic was when blessedmercy inquired from us if it’s a good idea to settle down with a man who earns 100k and she got bashed seriously. I felt we are living in denial when in reality we all know 100k is nothing considering the harsh conditions we are presently faced with

You won't be bothered about that if you earn well...focus on yourself first and make enough money.. you will attract the men that earns well..I do not know what this your noise is about..

And if the man you see is not earning well..then support him or leave his life and let ladies that can cope to stay with him..simple..

If this can make frontpage, then it's high time I leave nairaland.

Rozross:
No sir, my mom didn’t marry a man who will push her out there to hustle like a man to feed a man. My dad never turned my mother into a man but still she has her own money .

You are contradicting yourself.... Your mother wasn't pushed to go and labour yet she had her own money? You can't have money when you're not working except you're stealing or begging or selling yourself either way, you can't stay idle and earn money.

Secondly, those women selling at the market to support their husband aren't foolish.... Those women learning skills and opening shops to sew or make hairs to earn money aren't stupid.

When a man asks his wife to earn to contribute to the family, he's only trying to live up to a standard that both of them deserve and also have enough to save and invest to give their children a better future.

100k monthly earnings is big... Most times, your location and where you want to rent your apartment is what makes the salary look small...These days, you barely see a single selfcon for 250k let alone a one bedroom flat. And you have many other bills to handle.

But if a woman brings 50k to the 100k, 5hey can manage their resources even better as the load will reduce from the man's shoulder...


Think!

Rozross:
Most people will have to take their insults on blessedmercy back because I’ve not seen a well detailed analysis to counter her post. No relationship without support from other sources will survive in this present condition of the country on just 100k. Let’s try to take things easy and be truthful to ourselves

If you're ready to go down the relationship lane with a 100k earning man
Let's be realistic
I am also a realist, I don't expect you to have nothing to bring to the Table and if you don't have.

Things you'll have to lookout for is proximity to his work,transport and rent.
If his Job is around an expensive housing location,then either you people go for a Self contain with his savings,cause 10k-12k monthly from his salary will cover up for that.
While choosing his House,better to go for the most affordable.

Next is his transport,do everything possible to have him relocate closer to his working place.

Next is feeding.
Feeding comes with analyses, you're just two adults.
Rationalize how many percent goes for that.
You as a woman have to know how to manage,if you're good,the both of you can spend less than #1500 daily.(budget 40k for feeding)If you're Market smart, you'll have a considerable size of protein.
I tell you and this is achievable with bulk buying,choose something on your food list to buy in bulk bits by bits .
House keeping expenses
Light bill,if the House uses prepaid meter,cut your consumption so so well,you don't need the bulbs on till night, switch own bulbs not in use, don't overcharge your phone,switch off your connection when you're out.

Let's say 3k for that and 2k for any other thing,another 5k for miscellaneous.

How much is that?
That's close to 70k
Your hair,do Didi or manage #1500 per month.
Clothes,buy bend down select.
Toiletries (3k)
Save 10k
WATCHOUT for anything you can invest your savings on.
You and your man should look out for creating your cash flow.
Then do an health insurance,even if it's 3k monthly.
Don't forget your Gas,be smart about cooking.
All na management.

Mjshexy:
If he earns 80k, the lady should as much as possible be engaged with a job that pays her at least 50k so both of them can build their relationship well.

It all depends on their location, 80k a month in Lagos is NO NO!

I get it, no amount is enough but you need at least 120k monthly to survive as a couple just for food, except your want to spend more that on drugs and hospitals bills.

This is beside car maintenance, house rent and other emergency from family and relatives.

Let try and analyse it
Total income from the man 960,000
Total income from wife 600,000 (half of this have to go for her upkeep, that leaves 300,000)

Monthly food -120k- 960,000
Car maintenance 6 times a year @ 30,000- 180,000
House rent 350,000(this is the lowest for a room and parlor in Lagos)
Fuel for car - 20,000 monthly - 240,000
Fuel for generator (God help you if you want to use diesel) 10,000 monthly - 120,000

This alone is over 500,000 extra without, clothes, household items, gadgets, electricity, water, other stuff like waste management payment, outings, birthdays, church donation.

Any woman in a relationship or marriage without any legitimate occupation or profession like her man is a sponger or liability.

This life is not about 100k. It is about personality, contentment, mindset and beliefs...

After all he get my guy whey dey earn 500k and him madam still talk say the money na nothing say he go better make them japa ...say wetin 500k wan achieve for them life...

This life is about contentment...

sparko1:


It all depends on their location, 80k a month in Lagos is NO NO!

I get it, no amount is enough but you need at least 120k monthly to survive as a couple just for food, except your want to spend more that on drugs and hospitals bills.

This is beside car maintenance, house rent and other emergency from family and relatives.

Let try and analyse it
Total income from the man 960,000
Total income from wife 600,000 (half of this have to go for her upkeep, that leaves 300,000)

Monthly food -120k- 960,000
Car maintenance 6 times a year @ 30,000- 180,000
House rent 350,000(this is the lowest for a room and parlor in Lagos)
Fuel for car - 20,000 monthly - 240,000
Fuel for generator (God help you if you want to use diesel) 10,000 monthly - 120,000

This alone is over 500,000 extra without, clothes, household items, gadgets, electricity, water, other stuff like waste management payment, outings, birthdays, church donation.

Wait stop
Monthly food 120k
Yes Sir, whoever earns less should live less and consume less.
They won't die.

What kind of question is this? Nor go hussle....I don tell my guys before say at this stage wey we dey, we nor need any girlfriend, make your money first, na them go begin rush you...so as far as I am concerned this question is not for me and my peeps cos we nor send

Na God save you.

Nwatachoba1:
Broke up with my ex..why?

I told her I want to marry her

She said she can't and her parents can't allow it,I asked her why,she said I live in a room and parlor self contain, and anyone who wants to marry her must live in a 3bedroom flat, I told her that 3bedroom is nothing less than 2million currently in my area,even room and parlor self contain is 800k per year... she said if I can't, den we should forget marriage that her father lives in 3bedroom, now the so called family left where they stayed in bariga and moved to alagbado where they stay in 3 rooms.. the rooms are not painted neither furnished well and she dey try compare with the dad.. omo I had to find my square root somewhere else...

What I'm trying to say is that, if you can't cope or stay with the person earning 100k,u move along and look for those earning what you want.....

UyaiIncomparabl:


Stop being unrealistic, your 92K can't do anything.

For example, I tell you I want to make my hair and I need 10-15k, would you count that as "ridiculous demands"?

No wonder many ladies still remain in their father's house @ age 33 & above. Men don suffer.

Olalan:
Internet and fake living, you need to ask yourself how many people are gainfully employed in Nigeria? Majority of working class people earn below 100k monthly and yet marriages are conducted weekly.

If you like be waiting for a above 100k earner before starting a relationship......your eye go soon clear

Tell how one can start a family with 100k monthly or keep quiet.