I Don't Want To Help My Brothers - Family (4) - Nairaland
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My Brothers Wife Sends Him on errands.. please help / My Brothers Wife Is Cheating, Do I Tell Him Or Mind My Business / My Brothers life Is Becoming Messed: Becoming a Theif. Pls I need advice (2) (3) (4)
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| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by merit455(m): 11:23am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Chisomann:You are very wicked 2 Likes |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by HeightsKE: 11:23am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Chisomann:Ok one part is clear now...these are young guys who should be out there hustling...looks like they are lazy. I was out on the streets when I was less their age with nobody,just on my own and God has kept me 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by mukthar2000(m): 11:26am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Sister, life is give and take, though I understand how u feeling that make u sound angrily, they might be the lazy type that don't want to work, but want to leave big like their mate, but cosing u inconvenience, sister just keep ur calm advice them to get something doing , help anything u can do for them , don't expect any returned from them and leave the rest for Almighty God. |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by RepoMan007: 11:27am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Chisomann:extortion could be disguised as help to reach you. Help them get something doing and make it clear no free handouts again. Even CBN knows more money cannot solve mankind's problem and so don't print it carelessly or share it based on connection but by willingness to produce what meets needs. |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by SeriouslySense(m): 11:29am On Sep 30, 2022 |
I understand what you are going through, and you are not still certain about it, that is why you came here, i had a cousin who had a misfortune in Life, and because of that, i aimed to help by encouraging what this cousin can do,, and talking about different skills, and then watching as this cousin decided to learn more skills, right now, i can observe this person is becoming independent and will not need to depend on me constantly, i talked about a better mindset, without saying an insult or putting them down. I understand your Father is only concerned about you. Some People do not even give you updates about what they are doing, how they are succeeding or failing, whenever they need money that is when they remember you, this kind of people i avoid. so the best thing is to focus first on yourself and what you want to do, and if you have positive feedback or relationship with your half brothers, you may assist when you can. Chisomann: |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by Gospel2Day: 11:29am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Biglittlelois: The lady in question is not hardworking. She only happens to have a caring dad. When male siblings help and support their sisters financially they don't come online to complain, but it is when it is other way round that complaints start flying online. What if it is her own dad that's not responsible, would she be happy if her male siblings ghost her? We agree the 26 years old should hustle to support himself and his baby, but ghosting the 19 years old is wicked. What women expect men to do for them by way of financial assistance they can't do for men. 5 Likes |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by MedicH: 11:30am On Sep 30, 2022 |
how ur mama take de jump from penis to penis na. three kids from three different men all looking confused with life 1 Like |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by SocialJustice: 11:30am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Chisomann:Lol, your dad is quite nice and understanding. You are being taken care of, it is inappropriate for you to start taking care of others. That's like wasting your dad's money. Do not make it seem like quarrel sha, just be telling your brothers you don't have. If you are in surplus though and can comfortably care for your brothers, you should. Do not think of any future rewards that will come from your generosity. Charity is not investing. Charity is a privilege to be the physical tool God answers a person's prayer with. Your reward will never miss you. 1 Like |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by alibiz: 11:31am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Am one of those that believe in helping family members, look inwardly there must be one who is more responsible, call him out and help him to stand on his feet you will not regret it. _As a women if your brothers are poor, mind you your husband will look down on you one day. _Mind you they Are all you got, am is your shoe yet I can't abandon my blood, presently am working on my younger brother to stand as a man 1 Like |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by Tannhauser(m): 11:31am On Sep 30, 2022 |
pocohantas:  What exactly do you have against Andrew Tate? |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by simplesearch: 11:32am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Chisomann: As in their dad's? How many husband exactly does your mum has before her death? Seems like the older has a different father, you another and the two younger ones too, same father or different? Making 4 children to three or four fathers. If that's the case then your mum has really committed a lot of sexual atrocities. |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by Tannhauser(m): 11:33am On Sep 30, 2022 |
merit455: I disagree. She isn't wicked in any way. If she wasn't there, won't they survive? Please stop encouraging silly entitlement and laziness, as far as I am concerned she has been far too kind sef. She should cut them off so they can become MEN. Its called tough love. 3 Likes |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by Ekugbeh(m): 11:35am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Chisomann:And how do you want them to hustle. You mean join yahoo or enrol them in some skill acquisition what about school? |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by Lifestone(m): 11:35am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Bluntguy:If he carries more than he can cope, they all sink and no one will survive 2 Likes |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by achimendy(m): 11:36am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Chisomann: Your reason for not helping them is not valid. If you want to help pls help, stop giving unnecessary reasons. And stop saying if they make it tomorrow they won't remember you, you're not helping them so tomorrow they'll come and help you. They have conscience and sense to do the right thing if the need arise tomorrow. So free your mind and help if you want to, but if you dont want to help then leave it. It's not by force. 1 Like |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by TenQ: 11:37am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Chisomann:How old are you and your brothers? It seems they see you more as their family than you see them. Don't forget that we always reap what we sow! What if one of them becomes the Governor of your state. No one knows tomorrow. Do whatever is in your capacity to do: they are your brothers |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by SeriouslySense(m): 11:42am On Sep 30, 2022 |
You can also pray for them. I pray they get on their feet and they find themselves and become more independent. See ya later  |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by Majesty33(m): 11:44am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Try and help as much as you can within your own capacity. I still have regret of not carrying my immediate younger brother along while i was making money to sort my higher institution. Although he was working too but he lacks capacity to manage his money. Now i am regretting it as hell cos life has been really tough for him. 2 Likes |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by OsuIgboIpob: 11:51am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Chisomann:So why didn't you have to bring this rubbish here? Are you just seeking irrelevant attention or some senseless validations? ANYWAY, BLOOD TIES DOESN'T NECESSARILY MAKE A FAMILY.... A STRANGER OR FRIEND CAN BE MORE OF A FAMILY THAN SOMEONE YOU SHARE BLOOD TIES WITH. BESIDES, NO ONE WILL FORCE YOU TO HELP THEM. WE ALWAYS HAVE A CHOICE. |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by Johnn74: 11:54am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Chisomann: A Warri proverb says Lean on me doesn't mean say make you press me die!!!! Be wise.Use wisdom.only help whenever and as often as you can afford to!!!! Always put yourself first before giving out of benevolence.Take care of you.YOU CANNOT POUR FROM AN EMPTY CUP!!! 3 Likes |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by sonssyo: 11:55am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Blue86: Bros, sometimes most people will have the entitlement mentality, for instance, i have a boy that lived with my mum, after his SSCE he was around d house, my siblings asked him what he will like to be doing ,he said schooling but d truth is that he is not intelligent but have 5 credit because of special centre stuff, JAMB 147, of course that will only land him in college of education which is in our town Umunze but he said that he is not attending that very school. Now, he was at home, still probably waiting to write another jamb and started going for stone quarrying which he barley makes more than 1500 and fall sick again, now wen i came back one day in 2017, i asked him if he will do company work that pays 27k for SSCE holder, he agreed and started off, i was paying tfare, feeding weekly in the company there for him, buy soap for bathing, see where the problem started, d soap for bathing ,he will use it for washing soap, i cut that one off, the tfare given to him, he will trekk and eat the money(i found out one day wen i was coming inside the tricylce and met him trekking, asked him and he said yes he has been trekking, i cut that off, feeding (he works morning and night shift, he will cook when i am not around, eat everything and wash the pot and keep it back, how did i find out, one day i came back after heavy downpour, i entered d market to buy stuffs, came back only to discover that the sink was blocked. only for me to discover that rice have blocked it, i cut the feeding off, I only feed him for night and weekends, now in 2019 he said he wants to live alone, i vex instruct the people in charge of d money to release d savings for him, that is 121,000 plus that December salary of 34,000. He went home and squandered the money, now i told my siblings of his intentions to leave my house, which i don't have any problem whatsoever, because he is a man and need to be dependent, now they said No to him, in February, i asked him the balance of that money and he could not give the account, we continued with the savings til sep 2020 when i heard accident and went to d hospital, guy man probably thought i will not come back again, my wrist watch he was using them including my necklace, even gave d girlfriend my stuffs. fast-forward to now, he don't save anything again, he stopped d savings program and use his 46k salary on his own. Now, he stays with some friends since April this year, i only discovered that those guys have pursued him for their place because of women, he keep changing girls, he now stays some other place where he poo in the bush and bath outside, he is coming to me to help pay for house rent, he only made effort to enquire about house rent and when they told him, of course he can't pay. You see people are something else, no matter how good you are to them, definitely they will think that you have not done enough. Least i forget, he helps my mum, but that help i really appreciate it but i want him to be a man, this January, i told him to enter motor parts market beside our company and find a particular part to learn that i will give him money, from that January till date nothing, i made effort on my own to ask people around but couldn't get reasonable information, i cannot go there because my leg is not 100 percent OK yet. i only come to work and go back. Some people can never change. 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by GoodzGustavo: 11:58am On Sep 30, 2022 |
If your father no give you money, you your self go fit hustle legit? |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by KIDfurniture(m): 11:58am On Sep 30, 2022 |
Block alll their numbers. If you live in the same state . Just get a man to live with you that is bold. The insult from fellow man Dey reset lazy brothers brain deeper. Let them go and work biko. Lazy wizards Chisomann: |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by nick50(m): 12:00pm On Sep 30, 2022 |
One tin I noticed amongst yoruba culture is laziness ..thier men are very lazy thats why agberoism thrives in yoruba land more than anywhere else..all they do is sit down by d roadside extorting hardworking citizens and drinking ogogoro (local gin while thier women hawk agbo(local medicine upandan..i don't know why yoruba women are too promiscuous like how on earth can a woman born 3 kids from different fathers...like do they (yorubas) perform marriage rites at all ?? |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by detectivejones: 12:00pm On Sep 30, 2022 |
Help help help them! It can be draining when you're the giver sometime. Btw OP is someone else helping you? If your dad your helper is helping you without complaining do same. Remember there's a thin line between having and not having. Life table can turn anytime. |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by Mikesol: 12:05pm On Sep 30, 2022 |
As someone in a similar situation i am really pressured too... After all i read here I feel the 27 year old is undeserving and is too old for that type of help He should hustle The 19 and 21 are the ones who need help Even if not with money, with at least food stuff and bills so they will know the value of what you are doing I've come to understand that their are 2 ways you can help someone The first way is in giving them fishes and then the second way is teaching them to fish If you know there is a business that at least the most responsible can start and maintain You should finance it and remove your hand,let it be a source of income for them Keep giving them will only drain you and annoy you especially when you don't have. 1 Like |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by nams77: 12:07pm On Sep 30, 2022 |
Chisomann:Just call them for the last time and tell them things have changed. Help them one last time and move on Except its for life and death matter |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by GreaterFuture(m): 12:08pm On Sep 30, 2022 |
Chisomann:Are you older than them? Are you the eldest 1 Like |
| Re: I Don't Want To Help My Brothers by dododawa1: 12:10pm On Sep 30, 2022 |
Do your best and leave d rest for GOD. |
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