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Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place - Events (5) - Nairaland

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Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by Lovelydaisies: 4:17pm On Sep 15, 2023
It's okay if you're an atheist and don't believe in Christianity. Otherwise, if you go to church on Sundays and every other day, go for thanksgivings, blessings, all-night programmes, child présentation/dedication, baptism and communion services or attend masses, bury your dead at church, etc., I see no reason why you shouldn't wed in the church, even after having done the traditional rites.

What most people fear in the white wedding they so criticize is the reception, otherwise, it's the cheapest if you ask me : follow a marriage course, get your wedding dresses which can be sewn, hired or bought, anything, get your sponsors and rings, chikena! And the wedding can hold in a quiet place. That's a simple church wedding, with the blessings of God and the priest and the few people present.


If you like invite the whole town, that one concern you, you go feed them.


Give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar and to God, what belongs to God. If you believe in and respect tradition, do the rites. If you are a Christian, then add the Christian wedding. Enough of all these 'it is a European tradition' we keep repeating to ourselves, so as to avoid wedding in church.

Abi court wedding that is recognized by the government, no be foreign tradition? grin grin

Ndi mmadu sef.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by mogbeyiteren: 4:19pm On Sep 15, 2023
Our people has joined the rank of the strangers (white men) to say our customs are bad. Oh! what a pity.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by ogascomax: 4:25pm On Sep 15, 2023
NOwazobia:
Wedding is not the father's call, it usually a decision taken by the couples.

The father is just honoring the daughter's wish, and may not even be a member of the church, and equally may not be a christian.

The pastor is the foolish one here, because it is not her place to declare them husband and wife.

Shey na she born the pikin.

The father is in his right and very correct.

The pastor over step, and doesn't understand the concept of marriage.

The father doesn't want to ruin the marriage that is why he gave in to the pastor. That man was ready to go ballistic.

... and the Olodo members were foolishly laughing. pathetic 🤦🏽‍♂️


You made absolutely no sense with all you wrote down.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by Neddyogu(m): 4:37pm On Sep 15, 2023
The bride's father may just be throwing tantrums cos the officiating pastor is female (Which a lot of folks have problems with). Anyway, church wedding is just a vestige of European imperialism. Na formality.

1 Like

Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by bnovative(m): 4:47pm On Sep 15, 2023
Fiscus105:
That father is a foolish plus stark illiterate.

Why taking daughter to church since you don't ready to abide by simple rule of govt (not even church).

It's govt that can declare two persons married, not even church, and at that particular time, govt has ceded such power to church.


Even if not, why did he want to ruin the day of his joy because of irrelevant issue.

The father is very literate and enlightened.
There are three types of marriage as recognized by the marriage acts.
1. Customary (traditional) marriage
2. Registry (statutory) marriage
3. Sharia marriage.
Most wedding/marriages celebrated in most churches are not recognise by law, except such place of worship are license to act as registry.
And most Pentecostal churches don't have the license in this regard.
This is the reason some Pentecostal churches will insist, for one to celebrate one's marriage in church, one must go to have a court/registry marriage.
It's the only marriage that is monogamous.
Once anyone fulfilled his traditional marriage, he is married.

1 Like

Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by mrksquare: 4:50pm On Sep 15, 2023
Fiscus105:
That father is a foolish plus stark illiterate.

Why taking daughter to church since you don't ready to abide by simple rule of govt (not even church).

It's govt that can declare two persons married, not even church, and at that particular time, govt has ceded such power to church.

Even if not, why did he want to ruin the day of his joy because of irrelevant issue.


Under the Marriage Act in Nigeria, there are two types of marriages that are recognized by the law of the land: The customary and statutory marriage. And the statutory marriage isn't superior to the customary marriage.

So it isn't only the government that can join two people as husband and wife.

Besides, the customary law is even more potent that the statutory wedding.

In my place of Okrika, our highest customary marriage is called 'iya'. This marriage entails tying of traditional mat and also the indissolubility of the union.

The iya marriage doesn't recognize divource. After this rite, if the woman choices to divource her husband, when she dies she would be buried in her husband's place. If she goes out to have kids for another man, those kids are assumed to be the property of her husband. The iya marriage doesn't recognize divource of any kind.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by Sholuwa241: 5:15pm On Sep 15, 2023
post=125806663:

You are entitled to your opinion most definitely.
So are others who don't believe what you believe in.
W
Lies
See him morf like u are entitled to ur opinion abeg shift go one side
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by bnovative(m): 5:15pm On Sep 15, 2023
TenQ:

You are beyond redemption sir!

If you cannot explicitly answer my simple questions, please you may not be intellectually matured for further engagement.

Why should a couple have a second wedding if their first wedding is agreed to be valid?

Please if you can't answer this, I then don't bother.. just ignore it


Is there a law which says traditional wedding is the only valid wedding?
The marriage acts of Nigeria support only 3 types of marriage:
1. Customary (traditional) marriage
2. Statutory (court) marriage
3. Sharia marriage.
It might interest you to know that most churches, especially the Pentecostal church are not licensed to conduct registry/statutory marriage and as such, marriages done in such centers are not recognised by law.
The question is: how many people know this?
You can do your research or ask a lawyer.
What some churches do is ask intended couples to go do statutory marriage first and then come back for church celebration.
Let me end by saying that there are some churches that are licensed to conduct marriage and the law recognizes such marriage.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by Fiscus105(m): 5:19pm On Sep 15, 2023
mrksquare:



Under the Marriage Act in Nigeria, there are two types of marriages that are recognized by the law of the land: The customary and statutory marriage. And the statutory marriage isn't superior to the customary marriage.

So it isn't only the government that can join two people as husband and wife.

Besides, the customary law is even more potent that the statutory wedding.

In my place of Okrika, our highest customary marriage is called 'iya'. This marriage entails tying of traditional mat and also the indissolubility of the union.

The iya marriage doesn't recognize divource. After this rite, if the woman choices to divource her husband, when she dies she would be buried in her husband's place. If she goes out to have kids for another man, those kids are assumed to be the property of her husband. The iya marriage doesn't recognize divource of any kind.



That ur statutory , take it to embassy wen u re going abroad.

That ur statutory take it to court if u have issue in wedding.

Any marriage outside, registry/church or mosque is invalid.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by TenQ: 5:23pm On Sep 15, 2023
Matrix137:
(1) Valid in what sense, to man or to God?

(2) It all boils down to preferences and family orientation and enlightenment.

(3) What if they don't do any of those, and just paid only dowry, is the marriage invalid in God's eye ( not society here)

(4) check no 3 my submission

Now to second paragraph

(1) dowry has to be paid for the marriage to be valid in God's eyes. Not wedding of any type

(2) Valid in God's eyes
Dowry is not the requirement for a marriage to hold sir.

*Culturally, the Jews paid dowry on the wife
*In India, the women pay dowry on their husbands
*In old Europe, the women paid dowry on their husbands
*In Japan and South Korea, dowry is not a prerequisite to marriage
* In modern western societies, dowry is not a prerequisite to marriage


Except you want to tell me that their marriage is not recognised by God.

God recognises all wedding rites of men
1. Traditional
2. Civil
3. Church
4. Mosque
The core requirements of a valid marriage before God include
1. Mutual consent from both a man and woman to live together in an exclusive relationship as man and wife
2. Witness to this from Parents or Neighbours or Relations etc
3. Sexual consummation of the relationship
eg
-Ruth and Boaz (no dowry)
-Jacob and Rachel (Service but no dowry)
-Adam and Eve.



I have no problem with any kind of marriage a couple decide to do: however, I I have problem with a couple of (especially Christians) who is choosing to marry for a second time in church.

What advantage does getting married the second time convey on a relationship?


If a couple is married, let them build their marriage rather than having multiple marriages
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by Fiscus105(m): 5:25pm On Sep 15, 2023
bnovative:


The father is very literate and enlightened.
There are three types of marriage as recognized by the marriage acts.
1. Customary (traditional) marriage
2. Registry (statutory) marriage
3. Sharia marriage.
Most wedding/marriages celebrated in most churches are not recognise by law, except such place of worship are license to act as registry.
And most Pentecostal churches don't have the license in this regard.
This is the reason some Pentecostal churches will insist, for one to celebrate one's marriage in church, one must go to have a court/registry marriage.
It's the only marriage that is monogamous.
Once anyone fulfilled his traditional marriage, he is married.


The man is enlightened? Even though he has conducted valid marriage for her daughter, yet he went ahead to do the second marriage in the church, meanwhile,having reached thr, he still wants to dictate for church what to do.

That ur man, if he goes to hospital or school, he would be the one to tell them what to do.

If he knows he is the one to do Marriage for her daughter and not church why going to church for same marriage he has done?

You people will never think rationally for once.

Go and learn different between Marriage and wedding. I give u as assignment.

Wen u know it u will know who is doing wedding and marriage for daughter
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by TenQ: 5:44pm On Sep 15, 2023
bnovative:

The marriage acts of Nigeria support only 3 types of marriage:
1. Customary (traditional) marriage
2. Statutory (court) marriage
3. Sharia marriage.
It might interest you to know that most churches, especially the Pentecostal church are not licensed to conduct registry/statutory marriage and as such, marriages done in such centers are not recognised by law.
The question is: how many people know this?
You can do your research or ask a lawyer.
What some churches do is ask intended couples to go do statutory marriage first and then come back for church celebration.
Let me end by saying that there are some churches that are licensed to conduct marriage and the law recognizes such marriage.
My take on this is extremely simple.

A couple is fully married when they have fulfilled their last wedding rites.

1. God recognises all forms of marriage ordinance of men. The core requirement are that
a. There is a mutual understanding between the couple that they are henceforth haviyan exclusive relationship for the sake of building a family
b. There are witnesses to this understanding of exclusive relationship between them
c. There is sexual consummation of this exclusive relationship
2. A second wedding is a fallacy (especially if it is to be done in the church).
If a couple are already married, what is the duty of the priest?

3. A wedding is complete when the last wedding rites have been performed.
a. Traditional as last wedding rite
b. Civil/Court Wedding as last wedding rite
c. Church Wedding as last wedding rite

4. A couple can only be married once, I any second wedding is a caricature or to fulfill legal or civil requirements.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by Advancedman(m): 6:07pm On Sep 15, 2023
dre11:
The action of the bride’s father raises a fundamental question of when a marriage could be said to have really taken place – is it when a priest makes a declaration or when the parents of the bride and the groom give their consent, during a traditional ceremony?




https://www.premiumtimesng.com/news/top-news/625633-cleric-brides-father-disagree-on-who-should-declare-marriage-has-taken-place.html

A woman officiating your wedding that is the result.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by MMWandali: 7:05pm On Sep 15, 2023
Father is right
Pastor is wrong

No verse in the bible requires pastor to pronounce anything
God gave the power to parents to give out their children in marriage

Period!!
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by bnovative(m): 7:17pm On Sep 15, 2023
Fiscus105:



The man is enlightened? Even though he has conducted valid marriage for her daughter, yet he went ahead to do the second marriage in the church, meanwhile,having reached thr, he still wants to dictate for church what to do.

That ur man, if he goes to hospital or school, he would be the one to tell them what to do.

If he knows he is the one to do Marriage for her daughter and not church why going to church for same marriage he has done?

You people will never think rationally for once.

Go and learn different between Marriage and wedding. I give u as assignment.

Wen u know it u will know who is doing wedding and marriage for daughter
It doesn't occur to you that the man followed them (the daughter and the son in-law) because the couple asked him to?
Why not try using a marriage certificate issued by your church to present at the embassy as a proof of marriage when processing visa.
You are quick to label people foolish but couldn't research to know if what you posited is correct. Enjoy your ignorance.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by fastseo: 7:35pm On Sep 15, 2023
Fiscus105:



And who told you that you can do registry wedding in ur daddy compound? So far you have money to do it.

If u give registry people good money they will come and validate ur wedding in ur daddy compound. Again we must learn how to obey simple rule.
Do engagement in daddy compound and proceed to registry/church/mosque for validation not yet reduce us as african

according to the bible the bride's father is the one that gives his daughter out. Jacob, Isaac and all even moses had to pay bride price to the father of the bride before they took their wife.

there was no place in bible where marriage took place in synagogue or where Apostles weeded anyone

Read the below verses. Exodus 22:16-17 “If a man seduces a virgin who is not betrothed and lies with her, he shall give the bride-price for her and make her his wife. If her father utterly refuses to give her to him, he shall pay money equal to the bride-price for virgins
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by Nwagold(m): 7:44pm On Sep 15, 2023
I don't understand, is the ukpabio Mrs or Mr? I mean the apostle na woman abi na man?

By d way, why bringing ur girl to the church wen u have joined her with her husband during d traditional marriage? Why coming to church to drag who is supposed to?
The church is d apostle s terrotry and he should respect that, allow him do wat d rituals.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by prophetfire: 8:15pm On Sep 15, 2023
TenQ:

So,
when they have concluded their marriage rites, what were they doing before the priest?
. Church hijacking marriage process because the Europeans that brought Christianity introduced their native marriage culture into the church and the entire church copy it without asking questions about the scriptural basis for such
God didn't send the church or the pastors to go and be conducting weddings and joining couples in marriage.
Jesus never did it. Apostles never did it. Ancient church fathers never did it. Old testament priests and prophets never did it. It's dumb Christianity of following without asking questions.
Copy copy anything white man does.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by TenQ: 8:47pm On Sep 15, 2023
prophetfire:
. Church hijacking marriage process because the Europeans that brought Christianity introduced their native marriage culture into the church and the entire church copy it without asking questions about the scriptural basis for such
God didn't send the church or the pastors to go and be conducting weddings and joining couples in marriage.
Jesus never did it. Apostles never did it. Ancient church fathers never did it. Old testament priests and prophets never did it. It's dumb Christianity of following without asking questions.
Copy copy anything white man does.
No sir.
It is People carrying themselves to church for marriage.


However, Many before proceeding :
Is court/civil wedding valid?
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by Nuheights(m): 9:20pm On Sep 15, 2023
TenQ:

God recognises all kinds of marriage rites for a wedding
1. Traditional Wedding
2. Civil or Court wedding
3. Church Wedding
4. Mosque wedding

Is there any good reason why you think an already married people should get married AGAIN?

I don't think they should
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by donbenie(m): 9:24pm On Sep 15, 2023
superlanny:
This country and cruise sef, you agreed for your daughter to be wedded in a church and yet claim to be the one to declare them husband and wife.

Why he no carry them go shrine or better still proceed to confirm them in his living room, some people are just mentally unbalanced and that's not a suprise in this country.
In Igboland,once the bride price is paid and the man accepted the wine given by the Lady,the marriage is recognized..

Any other thing after that na cruise..
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by donbenie(m): 9:33pm On Sep 15, 2023
SIGE:
It's interesting how we sometimes overlook the sacred aspect of marriage, considering it as Holy Matrimony. There seems to be a trend where the sanctity is being questioned, and efforts are being made to secularize it, allowing almost anyone to officiate weddings. In the Western world, I've noticed instances where same-sex couples officiate weddings, and this concept is being promoted to us. In my view, a father's involvement in a wedding, particularly when making declarations, may not necessarily contribute to the sanctity of the occasion; it could be seen as more of a personal desire or ego-driven action.
Ogbeni,stop saying what you have no idea about.

We are Africans and Africans have their marriage rites.

If a traditional marriage has taken place, where the daughter was given in marriage by her father..

Then the couple are duly married..

Whatever you and the Pastor decides to say after that,is a half time show.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by donbenie(m): 9:35pm On Sep 15, 2023
post=125806663:

You are entitled to your opinion most definitely.
So are others who don't believe what you believe in.
It has nothing to do with believe..

Africans have marriage rites before the White Man..

A marriage is recognized once the dowry is paid,any other thing is cosmetics..

1 Like

Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by Iseoluwani: 9:36pm On Sep 15, 2023
TenQ:

No sir.

If traditional wedding is their last marriage rites, yes!
If the marriage rites include a church wedding, I then the church ceremony becomes the last marriage rite

u are wrong.
where did Isaac or Abraham do church wedding or were did the new testament christain do church wedding. dont be brainwashed
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by donbenie(m): 9:41pm On Sep 15, 2023
Matrix137:
Where is it written in the Bible that traditional wedding is compulsory? I just gave you the biblical instructions from God. Whether Jesus attended a wedding or not is irrelevant.
Ogbeni, marriages in the Bible are traditional weddings..

Where was it the Bible that a Priest must officiate your marriage?
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by Ishilove: 9:55pm On Sep 15, 2023
Tallesty1:
Marriages are actually conducted in the living rooms; between the man's people and the woman's people. No pastor has any right to give out another man's daughter in marriage or even confirm them married. A man a woman must be married officially before going to church for blessings
You don't even need to go to church for blessings. Anywhere the children of God are gathered, there the church is because the church is the body of Christ, not a building. The priest can still be present and bless the marriage right there on the day of the traditional marriage and it is binding in the spiritual realm.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by repaircentreng: 10:27pm On Sep 15, 2023
dre11:
The action of the bride’s father raises a fundamental question of when a marriage could be said to have really taken place – is it when a priest makes a declaration or when the parents of the bride and the groom give their consent, during a traditional ceremony?




https://www.premiumtimesng.com/news/top-news/625633-cleric-brides-father-disagree-on-who-should-declare-marriage-has-taken-place.html



The father is totally wrong cuz from ancient we know traditional is for family while father is the head while church is the priest while most cases pastor is the head .
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by Exceed15: 11:47pm On Sep 15, 2023
The pastor goofed. He should avoided the mild drama.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by bitbillionaire: 3:06am On Sep 16, 2023
I believe the bride's father has power to bless the union and declare them husband and wife and at the same time I also believe the man's argument and stubbornness during the wedding ceremony was unnecessary and showed lack of respect for God and the cleric. If he thought his blessing was enough why did he allow them to go for church wedding then?

I feel he was embarrassing the woman of God. He was luck the woman had patience with him. If I were the priest after correcting him the first time and repeat the question again if he still argue I would cancel and scatter the wedding immediately; send everybody out and lock my church. What nonsense
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by prophetfire: 3:36am On Sep 16, 2023
TenQ:

No sir.
It is People carrying themselves to church for marriage.


However, Many before proceeding :
Is court/civil wedding valid?
Valid before the law.
Re: Cleric, Bride’s Father Disagree On Who Should Declare Marriage Has Taken Place by Tallesty1(m): 9:12am On Sep 16, 2023
Ishilove:

You don't even need to go to church for blessings. Anywhere the children of God are gathered, there the church is because the church is the body of Christ, not a building. The priest can still be present and bless the marriage right there on the day of the traditional marriage and it is binding in the spiritual realm.
No priest will bless my own. I don't need church wedding at all.

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