GanagiBitrus:
If you are the only surviving or financially-capable inlaw, it becomes your responsibility, especially for the sake of your beloved wife.

Truth

Then go to your village to look for the wife you can easily manipulate just because you paid her bride price.

Emotionss:
[color=#006600][/color]

Before you decide to marry me you must first respect me and what I stand for..

You must submit to my authority and the rules governing my Home.

I will love, provide and protect you as MY WIFE as it is my duty to do so. But I will also not compromise my authority and principles all in the name of being modern or woke.....

Your conditions and manipulations and Feminist believes will not be tolerated in my home.

Crafteck1:
Its not your responsibility doesnt mean you shouldn't do it but means you are not obligated to, hes right... Abi na handicap una dey marry wey no fit care for hin parents?

There are some things that ought not to be discussed, let alone publicized, this is where this Reno guy has failed. As men, not every topicsl issues should be broadcasted. No no

Samantha124:
Why expect me to cook for your family if you want nothing to do with my family?

Isn't that selfishness?

If my family members visit, our kids won't eat

Love isn't supposed to be one sided.

Gentlesoul2021:


This is totally unrelated. They are talking financial gesture towards ur in-laws u are talking otherwise...

ExudeLoveToAll:
Why won't men die you? you marry a lady and then carry the problem of her family on your head, if you do this you are own your own. Your financial success is a long way shot.

The thing that is so annoying is that the family will leave their biological children alone when they have financial issues and starts putting pressure on an inlaw who comes second fiddle in ranking.

When properties are shared in the family nobody calls the inlaw to come and collect his share that time they remember he is not their biological son but when problems are shared he becomes the first son if the family. That's for those who wants to remain in the rat race of life

Oy help when you can help and not as a duty, that is left for the children to cater.

A friend of mine was sharing his expenses and income with me and our was shocked the percentage he spent on his girlfriend and his her family , some one that is a middle income eaner in Nigeria. Because of this his income was slightly lower than his expenditure and that was baffling to me. He has no single savings , no investment then I asked him if you want to marry this girl what will you use in marrying her? His reply was that you are there, you will cover 59 percent expenses for me leading to a big laughter.

This is how people run their life with expenditure greater than income because of the load they carry, I just told my friend the truth that he needs to cuff off a lot of people if he can save for investment and wedding. That he expects me to fund his wedding when he earns over ten times the minimum wage in in Nigeria without a single savings to his name, that he must be joking. My guy is adjusting and making amends. Most ladies will never do this for a guy and his.

Men just like carrying unnecessary pressure on their head...

What he needs at this time is to financially deveop himself and have investments not love interest. It wont end well unless a miracle happens

sharone21:


Thank you my husband.

Oversabi kills the sweetness of marriage..... Haven't we seen inlaws who go the extreme for their son inlaws eg selling their properties to raise business capital for them or to add to it?

Anyway, everyone knows how to handle things, anybody that likes listen to all nonsense from media.

Social media presents every idiot as wise nowadays. These are the people destroying the joy and beauty of family support. Anyway we will keep knocking it into their dull brains till they realize that sound family values are the bedrock of stable and happy societies.

The husband part made my heart skip o.

Samantha124:
It's my duty to perform the domestic roles for my man only and not his family... Since he wouldn't want anything with assisting my family financially when they're in need of financial assistance, I'll also want nothing to do with assisting his family domestically.

I'll give his family their bride price back if they're going to use it against me.

Dont mind your attackers. You are on track.


A man should extend a hand to his inlaws because by interoretation of law, they are family-in-law. Also, because when most men become broke or fall, they turn to their wife to seek help from home. If this insurance avails itself, then ahead of such evil day, men should extend kindness as they can afford to their inlaws

That's how my wife asked me if I don't know that some men build house for their father in-law. And I replied that that's same way some women's family build house for their son inlaw (so their daughter will live in a comfortable atmosphere) and buy car for the as well for mobility.
I should leave my family and start taking care of you and your family as u too get sense. Nonsense.

1TrippleCee:




What he needs at this time is to financially deveop himself and have investments not love interest. It wont end well unless a miracle happens

You are right....that was why I said investment before marriage.


People make mistakes as lot , right decision making is the most important trait anyone can have.

Problem with you is that you want the love and respect to only favour you and your family while you don't reciprocate it just because you paid the bride price.

I will give you your bride price back and maybe it'll cook for your family when they visit.

Emotionss:
[color=#006600][/color]


Again you just proved my point.

It is obvious that the type of men you have been dealing with all your life are feminine weaklings who are willing to trade their manhood and authority just to be your companion.. weaklings who are no Man enough to put you in check.

The only reason you will be willing to return the supposed bride price to your so called husband is because you married a Simp. A Frameless nonentity that has been emasculated either by you or by society. And the fact you even have such thoughts and even expect the weaklings of a husband to accept the money also proved my point...

Samantha124:
Love isn't supposed to be one sided.

It's not one sided. You cannot carry the burden of ur family together with ur in-laws for head. Na body go tell the man. U can assist once in a while. That's reasonably enough...

Since you're not married, then you shouldn't be telling me about marriage.

Swahili is SA?

OlawaleBammie:


I am not married yet, but premarital stage self na shege promax from you girls..

Well, I know that south Africa can never be an all-zulus affairs..cus as little as I know, we have the zulus, afrikaans speaking whites, maybe small swahili and Sepedi (as I was told by you then )

Mentality of poverty. Your mate build upstairs for their in-laws. Took them as his parents 2. I wonder how this man calls him self a pastor. Very selfish individual. God bless me so that I will take care of my in-laws. They suffer to train that diamond you are living as a wife today.

Why must I be selfless when the person would be selfish

Connected1:

What's up with the comparative analysis, you can do better.

Reno is a known clown, taking care of the homeless, your colleagues and your cousins isn't a man's responsibility but he who has money does these things regardless.

Don't compare yourself with people and be in useless competitions, be the selfless type of person you are.

NwokoloOwa:

940k is nothing to a loving wife and a happy home

Normal scam you'd always hear like say she's the only good girl in the universe

The aspect does apply because a man is expected to be the provider while the woman is expected to be submissive.

But if you're not going to provide for my family even if you have the means to do it ( especially during tough times ), then I won't be submissive to your family even if I can.

tollyboy5:

She's not going to cook for my parents in their home. If they visit our home then she's meant to cook for them.
Note i'm not actually againt taking care of your inlaw. I believe my inlaws are my second parent, just that the aspect of cooking you raise don't apply as equal treatment.

If you want it to be, then it will be.

Remember the ball is in your court.

omooba969:


It has to be a contest, isn't it?

Phew! 🥴

Samantha124:
Since you're not married, then you shouldn't be telling me about marriage.

You...are u married??

Swahili is SA?

i tot southie has little of swahili tho

mastermaestro:
Very easy to spot irresponsible men. This internet loafer thinks being a man is just about possessing a penis. Bloody sissy! Take care of your in-laws as much as you can.

For your information, there are many men who care for nobody but themselves, yet poverty lives with them.

Do you read to understand or you read to respond?

So you're kicking me out?😭😭😭

omooba969:


I wonder how you're able to relate on this issue, as a South African...I really wonder!

I think you should get your nose out of this.

Tryna have an opinion on such a sensitive matter....Imagine!

No.

We don't have Swahili.

OlawaleBammie:

You...are u married??

i tot southie has little of swahili tho

I can also only cook for my in-laws once in a while when they visit.

Because I'd have work to go to.

Gentlesoul2021:


It's not one sided. You cannot carry the burden of ur family together with ur in-laws for head. Na body go tell the man. U can assist once in a while. That's reasonably enough...

Samantha124:
The same reason my husband wouldn't see his in-laws as his responsibility whenever they're in need of financial assistance.

I'll assist my family myself and I'll expect him to do the same thing with his family.

Probably South Africans are ok with that culture, here in Nigeria, courtesy demands you serve or offer your visitor food, particularly your family.

I'll make a plan for the kids.

id4sho:


If my family members visit, our kids won't eat

I'll make a plan for the kids.

I can buy takeaways for them...

id4sho:


If my family members visit, our kids won't eat

[color=#006600][/color]

Samantha124:
Problem with you is that you want the love and respect to only favour you and your family while you don't reciprocate it just because you paid the bride price.

I will give you your bride price back and maybe it'll cook for your family when they visit.

Just look at you of the things one can try to use to threaten someone like me, cooking is definitely not one of those things....

Try that return of bride price nonsense with me and find yourself replace immediately...

A replaceable nonentity forming irreplaceable and priceless...

I honestly don't blame you south African men have proven time without numbers to be weaklings, lazy and below average in terms of masculinity.

Person wey I know is taking care of her wife mum, five children of the wife late Sister, the wife daughter and they still dey small money for the wife papa for village..... They have been married for six years and the lady never born for am......
All this people inside one room and parlour.
Wetin dey vex me be sey the children the disrespect the guy

ExudeLoveToAll:


They will drain you to the core.

If you know how many business men have gone down through this route with this mindset of catering for all expenditures in the wife family you will marvel.

It is never your responsibility as a man, you can only help where you can else you get crushed economically.

Interestingly, those who benefited will be the ones to taunt you when you go down, that you don't know how to handle money. This scenario has played out a million times.

Yes, looking after inlaws is generally not a mans responsibility, but there are exceptions.
If your wife is the only surviving child of her mother & her mother falls sick, it's her responsibility to take care of her, which indirectly becomes your responsibility too.

Okay, I'll pay for my own bride price for the wedding then...

Because I'm an African and there won't be any traditional wedding without the bride price.

ExudeLoveToAll:



You don't need to wait till athen, ensure its zero rand during the wedding.

Samantha124:
Why must I be selfless when the person would be selfish

Because 2 wrongs don't make a right and for your own mental health you got to do better.

Some of us have stingy siblings who we still help when they are in need, we just value our mental health, instead of seeing them suffer, we just help them and hope they realize their foolish attitude someday.