₦airaland Forum

Nigeria seems to be doing well on papers.

PDP and APC are like frying pan and fire. We previously thought that frying pan was too hot, so we jumped into the fire. Now we're praying for 2023 to come for us to jump back into the frying pan.
Don't we have other parties in this country? The worst thing is that, you'll still find the same leaders both in the frying pan and the fire.

ibedun:
Pure marriage bias!

Like I told you (do your research if you require) here in the UK, my children are well rounded, balanced, successful in their chosen career, recognised etc etc
I thank God (I am a Buddhist!)

There are so many failed unbalanced children who lived under one roof with both parents present. A child that would be wsyward and lost will be!

Stop justifying ur self, u made mistake in the past that resulted to u having children out of wedlock and you're defending it as if u made the right choice. Anything ur children r today is not because of u but because of their mother who've always been there for them, if their mother was like u, she would have abandoned them too and ur children may have died, grow up in the street or raised in orphanage. I'm sure you're justifying urself just to make urself happy and guilt free because regret is not good for ur health.

People with ur type of mentality are the one advocating that human should live like (lower) animals (She-goats precisely). When a she-goat goes out, random goats sleep with her and when she gets pregnant, she takes care of herself alone. When she give birth she also single-handedly train and provide for her kids. The goat that impregnated her is some where chasing other she-goats (he have no idea what responsibility means). That's the kind of lifestyle you're supporting. This is worst, because some lower animals do have spouse and they live together to provide, take care of their offsprings and give them proper upbringing. People like u only get women pregnant and send them money, as if money is all it takes for proper upbringing of a child. U haven't been in ur children's life, so you've done nothing for them (the money u sent them was nothing). Here u are proud of them for making it without u (that is to say, you're actually useless after all). Do u think they're happy with u? They accepted u not that they're happy with u. You've deprived them of the joy of having a father in their lives.

The most painful part is that they may end up like u too. They won't be responsible and committed. They'll be impregnating and dumping women only sending them money just like u. because discipline, responsibility and commitment are the important things that only u can teach them, but u shirk them. While ur daughters (if u have any), might be having difficulty staying in a relationship with men.
Marriage is the only thing that makes men to take their responsibility with all pleasure. Out of wedlock most guys refuse to send their baby mamas money. After divorce, ex husbands refuse to take care of their children from ex wife.
When their mothers were unable to cater for them alone, they neglect the children and they become wayward constituting nuisance in the community.

I'm aware you're in evaluation period in ur life, when u evaluate ur whole life and count ur achievements. When u remember and be proud of the good decisions u made and regret the wrong ones. Ur children are definitely not part of ur achievement but their mother's great achievement in life.

No any levelheaded omosapian would be happy to have abandoned his own children for their mother (in the name of civilization) or encourage others to make the same mistake he made. Ur children may have made it even without u, but other people's children may not make it (as things are getting worst in this generation).

Some people no get work 0oo. Na to dey monitor who follow and who unfollow each other on instagram. Y are we always trying very hard to prove Buhari right?
Lazy youths every where.

ibedun:
You should have said you are pro-marriage from the beginning and be biased accordingly. My children are successful well educated professionals working in the “city of London” (in the financial district) and both are doing phenomenally well.
They were not brought up in the usual “marriage or family setting” and yes, I admit I enjoyed a single life for the most part of their life! But I was to meet all of their financial and emotional / social needs. They spent long periods of stay in my bachelorette house as they wished. 20 years later they are well adjusted, serious and focused. They are miles better than many kids who grew up in 2 parent homes!
A child that would be wayward and unbalanced would be, regardless of whether the parents are living together or not!

All the adjectives u used in qualifying them (as successful, well educated, professional etc) doesn't stop them from suffering from mental, emotional and psychological problems due to ur absence in their lives. A child that would be wayward would be. But if a child would be "worst", a proper upbringing can reduce it from "worst" to "bad". Similarly, if a child would be "good", good upbringing would make me "better" or even "the best". The advantages of living under the same roof with both parents cannot be over emphasized (and all that can only be achieved through marriage).

U have lose a lot because there's nothing that binds u together with ur children, only the respect they have for u as a Dad. Like I said money, gifts etc doesn't help in curing their emotional, psychological problems (which they may not like to discuss with u) u came into their lives when their hearts were sealed and bind was already created with the Mum alone. That's reminds me of Actress Regina Daniel's father whose opinion about his daughter's marriage to Munir doesn't count. Lol

Ur children have lost a lot too because they were unable to learn many things from u due to ur absence. U must have had them when u were young, inexperienced, full of life and afraid of spousal responsibilities. I pray they don't follow ur footsteps. But their childhood experiences would definitely affect them.

The problem is that u still argue in support of the lifestyle u once lived. Marriage is not compulsory, it's for the mature minded people. It's like university and not everyone that will pass Jamb let alone be qualified to be admitted into university. I believed in the stage u are in life right now, it's a time u need a good companion and a life partner so badly to keep u company. If u don't have, it might eventually lead to loneliness, depression etc.

Lol, by the way, I'm not pro-marriage, but ur choice of words, prejudice and lopsidedness said a lot about u and that's y was trying to encourage u not to give up on marriage. Marriage is part of human culture, it will never die till the end of time.



peace!

VEXT:
Saurare wannan wawan..So having four or more wives,stops a man from having concubine outside... Come to the north and see alhajis fucking any how...

I used the word "curb". Another word for "curb" is to "curtail" or "limit".
If a God conscious man thinks of committing adultery because he's in love with another lady, he can marry her and stop himself from committing adultery. Most marriages crash today because the man has a side chick he what's to marry, but because their religion doesn't allow it, he will kick the wife out with children in order to bring in new wife (giving flimsy excuses for divorcing her). That's is unfair.

GOTVee:
Even though I'm a born again Christian, i think a lot of modern marriages will always fail until we Christians adopt the Islamic system of marriage which allows men to have multiple wives. Until we Christians openly adopt and support polygamy, men are meant to cheat on their wives which will in turn result in domestic violence and divorce.

Lol, who told u Christians don't marry more than one wife? FFK na Muslim?

VeeVeeMyLuv:
This their religion, they don't know the extent of damage it has done to them yet

Her wickedness has nothing to do with her religion. FFK married 2 wives too.
What's the point of having one wife and one side chick? If u married ur so called side chick to curb adultery they'll say it's polygamy. It's monogamy as long as u keep sleeping with other women and having children with them out of wedlock.
Hypocrisy na him be una problem.

Pancakeey:
How have you been surviving without a brain?
Must be very hard to talk without thinking

I've read some of ur old and new comments and there is no iota of sense in any of them. You're quick to insulting people. I don't blame u, it's because ur parents filled ur empty skull with a stale indomie, u think what u have up-stairs is a brain?. U are brainless, don't be deluded!.

Ausrichie:
Wrong my ass, he called the old foolish vegetable out and that is the right thing to do, it's all this respect your elders morons that would stop us from moving in this country, countries that call out their leaders irrespective of age or position always progress, but look at us. Who born me for this shithole abeg.

I understand how u feel but that's not the best way to go about it. Would u be happy if anyone calls ur Dad an old foolish vegetable? We can call him out without being disrespectful.

Seerade029:
Is Buhari a young man?

Of course he's an Old man, so Wizkid is correct.

Give me ur house address let me come and call ur father an old man. Lol
Wizkid was wrong for insulting the president. His music is the better way to express and pass his message without being disrespectful. But it lacks substance just like black face said. Aside "Ojuelegba" I don't know any other meaningful song he sang. Wizkid and Davido are nothing but glorified and overrated (Freestyling) noise makers favoured by their stars.

ibedun:
Rubbish, there is nothing like common law marriage I insist. You referenced a legal precedent in a court in Canada (biased as usual towards a woman) not an established law backing common law marriage. That judgement (interesting though) has been subjected to challenges and has not been upheld anywhere!

In the US and UK, and most part of Europe common law marriage is not recognised and you cannot seek remedy under a law that doesn’t exist.
That said the new laws regarding cohabitation are being established in SOME western countries where a man is living with a woman under the same roof and they have children together - that is cohabitation laws and associated remedies.

It won’t be long before men start to seriously fight back.

Also a man will be putting himself in danger by dating poor women. Men are already stopping that nonsense.

U should have done scanned the articles carefully rather than just skimming through. Common law marriages has been abolished in MOST part of US not all parts. Go back and scan it again.
The fact that the term common-law marriage has wide informal use, often to denote relations that are not legally recognized, doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Just like boyfriend and girlfriend, it's not legally recognized but that doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

Most countries refer to common law marriages with different names e.g marriage like relationships, de defacto relationships, unmarried couples etc, read about common law in Australia and other countries.
Unmarried couples have legal rights in some countries while in some countries they don't.

You're contradicting urself, u believed common law marriage (which is often used colloquially or refer to by the media as cohabiting couples) doesn't exist, but Cohabitation laws exist in MOST western countries. How can laws exist on something that doesn't exist? U thought "cohabitation laws" are not meant for "cohabiting couples"? You've shot urself on the foot. Lol

Finally, u sound like a person who doesn't believe in marriage. You'd rather impregnate random women and continue to live ur life as a single guy all ur life, indirectly circumventing spousal responsibilities (which isn't gonna be healthy for ur children) than being responsible and committed. If u dislike legal marriages, then try traditional marriage.
A child who has both parents under the same roof can't be emotionally, mentally and psychologically compared to a child raised by a single parent (that's y most children raised by single parent especially single mothers are inhumane because they lack proper upbringing).
To give ur children what u lacked as a child is not by spoiling them with money, gifts and enrolling them into expensive schools, but by giving them the best gift (which is a good mother) and then a proper upbringing under marriage. Just the way we don't give up in relationships after heartbreaks, let's not give up on marriage for our children sake.
I wish us all the best!



peace!

ibedun:
Look at this one oooo. Who told you all these lies?

Oga, marriage is not critical to life! And there is nothing like common law wife (in law), if you are not living together there is no legal status of any kind. In Europe men are refusing to marry......now!
Shortly from now it will progress to men refusing to have children.

There's nothing like common law marriages or spouses? Lol, Guy stop disgracing urself on social media. Google the phrase "common law marriage" or "informal marriage" and read more about it on Wikipedia.
U can be couples even without being legally married. A man was once ordered to pay his ex girlfriend 50k dollars monthly alimony.
https://www.nairaland.com/6111393/man-ordered-pay-ex-girlfriend

Hope you've learned something new today?


peace!

Pataricatering:
so it’s d child’s fault ? Y don’t u have sense like this ?

I was referring to those 5 guys that raped her u blockhead. Ur dickheadedness is legendary.
U see the way you've insulted and humiliated ur generation?. U should have cut off ur fingers than writing hogwash that shows how senseless u are. Now that it's obvious that u have comprehension issues, I'll advice u read every comment 7 times before u quote anyone to avoid subsequent embarrassment.
I know the medicine of cold, catarrh, fever, headache etc but I'm afraid I don't know the medicine that can cure ur senselessness. Nevertheless, I wish u quick recovery!.

This Man is suffering from spiritual shortsightedness. E no dey forsee Trouble in Naija politics na America own him dey forsee.

Yampotatocarrot:
My brother, he is correct. With the way things are going, marriages might just be a thing of the past.

Look at the Europe you mentioned, people now jump out of marriages for flimsy excuses. Men there don't even want to marry again cos the law favours the woman whether he acts right or not.

I'm even surprised you sef Europe as an example when talking about conservation and continuity of the marriage tradition

Bro. It's obvious that u didn't read and understand my comment well. From the way u sound, u don't seem to know the difference between legal marriages and common law marriages. In Europe, if u refused to do legal marriage, ur girlfriend (if u have any) would be considered as ur common law spouse (they also have some rights but not like ur legally married wife). Ur legally married wife is ur spouse and ur girlfriend is (considered as) ur (common law) spouse too. U can only decide not to do legal marriage to avoid feminists rigid laws.

What u don't understand is that, in Europe anything that brings man and woman together is referred to as either marriage or common law marriage. We can only call it any name we like, but that doesn't change the fact that it's a marriage. That's y ur girlfriend u live with and ur baby mama are considered as ur spouses.
Being in a relationship is being in an indirect or informal marriage.

Many can't afford formal marriage, so they go for informal marriage. Just like the person that can't afford original wears or clothes go for Okrika, but all na still clothes na abi?. Lol

Formal marriages favour women and their children more, while informal marriages doesn't favour women and their children that much. Majority of the products of informal marriages lack proper upbringing. They're the ones constituting nuisance in this world today.

Here in Africa, we copy the wrong things, most Africans avoid marriage in order to circumvent spousal responsibilities. What Europeans are running away from is not spousal responsibility or marriage itself, but the strict laws in marriage that favours women more than men, that's y some of them marry other race especially Africans that doesn't have strict laws.

Till the end of time, human will continue to marry (legal marriages) no matter how few they may be. If u can't take the risk or afford it, some can.




peace!

starbuck:
I pity for the incoming generations

A time shall come when this institution called marriage will be a thing of the past

A time shall come when u will be a thing of past not marriage. Marriage is part of human culture. Officially and legally married couples may decrease with time, but common law marriages would remain and even prevail. And there are laws that govern it in Europe. U can't circumvent spousal responsibilities in the name of being single (it's not healthy for our children).

U graduated with 2.2 perhaps because u were busy chasing girls. When ur type becomes a lecturer, hope u no go dey involved in sex for grade scandals? Lol

She thinks 15k is too small. What does she do for her boyfriend apart from sex? See how some guys waste money because of a woman that has nothing to offer except sex.
If u advise them to marry and spend the money on their wives, they'll say that they're not ready for any commitment.
Running away from reasonable commitments to unreasonable commitments.

solmus:
It's funny how I have never seen this so called tramadol before in my life

So, there're people like me on nairaland? I thought I'm the only saint here 0oo. Lol

Why won't there be rapes everywhere when all children of nowadays hear, talk about and watch on TV are all related to Sex?

Bkayyy:
A classical trait of bad upbringing is involving people's parents in discussion because the individual has no regards his/her own.
You can state your point without involving parents.
Thanks

U are the one with bad upbringing here. Advising people to engage in immoralities is a classical trait of bad upbringing. You're not happy when ur Mum is used as an example, but u want other people's mother to engage in the immoral act.
If u don't want anybody to insult ur parent, don't insult anybody's parents. The women u advised to go into prostitution are other people's mothers.
What would u feel if u have female daughters and I advised them to go into prostitution because it's lucrative?

Try to connect ur fingers with ur brain. Perhaps by so doing, u may type something meaningful next time.


Gracias!

Because she's surrounded by people like her, she thought 95% of female students are into prostitution. That's not true. So, she means to say that their parents do nothing for them?

Bkayyy:
Taking a good look at both pictures you will realize that she was always a stripper even in the church.
I commend her for being brave to pursue her dream. Moral lesson "never allow the society or religion to tie you and your dreams down, our main aim in life is to be happy".
If what makes you happy is to be a prostitute, pursue it because that is what you are best at and nobody can beat you in the business which is in fact very lucrative

If ur Mum thinks that what would make her happy is to be a prostitute. Would u advise her to become a prostitute and even patronize her? It's not everything we want that's good for us.
I'm not sure you'd advise ur Mum to become a prostitute, so don't advise other people's Mum to become one.

Most times our hearts desire what will destroy us, making it looks like the happiness we're craving for. After sometime, we'll then realized that what we thought to be happiness was not real happiness, it was a mirage. Then, depression would set in, because we spent a lifetime chasing a mirage. That's how many adults including teenagers destroyed their lives. What's ur duty as a parent? If ur child takes a wrong lifestyle that would eventually destroy him/her, would u allow him/her because that's what makes him/her happy at that moment? THINK!

To be happy is not by going for our heart desires, but knowing how to control our hearts and not letting it to control us. If u don't learn to control ur heart (and want it desires), you'll live all ur life enslaving urself and serving ur own (heart) desires, it will always be unsatisfied no matter how much u tried and at the end, it will make u to feel empty and depressed.

The biggest mistake one can make in life is to take one's (heart) desire as god!



peace!

Oxtonguy:
Nawa

It's because the hardship is not affecting them. Stop them from collecting 100-200 naira bribes at check points and watch them join the revolution. Lol

JIMMY1393:
Na pot hole be that wey resemble Nigerian map?

Nigeria is a pot hole. Lol

Dreamliner787:
See as e be like Nigeria map sef

That's y dem say we're in NIGERia. We're all swimming in RIVER NIGER. May we not drown in this country. A wise man once said: "surviving in Nigeria should be added to our CV". Lol

KossyKiss97:
Bros na pepper soup nah . Dem no dey use red oil cook pepper soup.

Na like this dem dey cook pepper soup? Pepper soup with banana abi na plantain. Lol

Only 3 things? Things wey we dislike about Nigeria pass things wey we like about am. Should I mention them? Lol

KossyKiss97:
Ok... Idara you try you hear, no mind people wey dey talk another thing.

She no try abeg. The food dey like child's play. No red oil. Abi na groundnut oil she use cook the food? I no like brownish soups. Lol

Chijeep:
The way Nigeria is vomiting bad news is making someone think that Blood is no more thicker than water, especially the issue of family crisis

Blood is thicker than water and money is thicker than blood in this generation.

chrisxxx:
It is unlawful to be lawful in an unlawful society.

You're wrong. Be the change u want to see in the society. It's good to be good.