₦airaland Forum

Chomyg:
Good evening all. I engaged an immigration consultant last year and he didn’t meet up to our agreement. He has refunded and also sent me an attached email that he has withdrawn my express entry profile. He created the profile on his own account. Please how do I proceed from here? My IELTS still has till dec next year to expire.

Bobodee09:
Long read..

I moved into were am currently staying in 2022 and have seen a small girl suffered abuse alot.

Despite having water running 24/7 in the compound the girl fetch water everyday, she run errands, bath and prepare her uncle 2 son for school and go drop them off.
A girl of 9yrs will do all this with no proper meal, she has no clothes, only wear rags, bruises all over her body
Sometime late last year I got a school bag for free and decided to gift the girl cos she carry polythene bag to school. The next day her uncle approached me, he first thanked me and ended it with I should have given it to the wife directly instead of the girl, I told him he know me and his wife aren't cool at all hence why I didn't do that.
He told me I should have given him instead, ok no wahala.
Guess what this woman didn't allow the girl use the school bag rather her first son was using it and the girl kept carrying polythene bag to school.

Matter at hand.

Yesterday I was off work, after doing some housework I decided to take a nap around 2.....voice of loud cry and scream woke me up about 20min later.
This woman was beating the girl as usual, this kept going on for 30min and I couldn't sleep.
About 50min later I couldn't take it anymore so I went to her apartment to warn habout the noise , after I got back inside my apartment she increased the beating accusing the girl of attracting disrespect to her.

I called the husband he didn't pick, then I called my landlord and explained things to him. I let him know I will get the police and welfare involved.
With annoyance he called the husband to park out since they are even owning him a year rent already.

This morning the man came to my apartment accusing me of hatred towards his family and his wife was raining insult on me.
I just asked him to pay me 20k he is owing me since last year May and the outstanding fee for pre-paid have been loading from February till now.

Am about going to the station to report him and his wife, getting the welfare Involved. My landlord is in full support.
Note- the girl is the man sister daughter, she is in the village

Mrperfecto:
I will just be brief without writing too much.

We are based we have 4 children, my first child is 13 from my previous relationship, she has become very terrible, she doesn't listen to me or my wife. She tells her that she is not her biological mother and she cannot control her. She had threatened to call the police on my wife telling her if she touch her she will fight her back and call the police. She goes to school and closes at 3.45 her school is 10 mins walk from home, but she is always late for home.

She comes home around 6 sometimes 7pm , as I am writing now every friday she closes at 12.30 but she is still hasn't come back home yet.

I am on my way to work. I start at 6.30pm till 2.30am so I rarely get to see her and she only misbehaving when I am not around. So far we have seized her phone because we had found so many inappropriate messages exchanges between her and boys. We had also removed the TV from her room and her behaviour has gotten worse. She is behaving like she's possessed.

My wife and I are fed up. Even her siblings are tired of her. We want to send her back to Nigeria maybe in a boarding school until she is 18 in order to protect her younger ones. If we keep her and she continues with her terrible behaviour I may beat her badly and we may end up loosing all 4 children to the authorities.

Please what advice will you give to me concerning this issue?

bizlinks:
Let's bring the Salary scale in Nigeria by the companies and organizations. Hide your identity please, by not adding personal info.

What is your Salary?
What is your Position?
What is your Qualification?
How many year/s experience?
Organization or company name?
Lastly, tell us your location/state?


This will help employers know the salary of different professions and what to offer new employees, and will also help employees know their supposed earning. Thank you

thesilentman:
My blood is burning now as I write.My wife has now completely changed for bad, a few days after our second child.

An erstwhile submissive woman that i thought i had tamed for life has now become a thorn in the flesh to me. I just parted with over 300k unplanned fund for her C.S. I thought she'd be more respectful to me now but no,she has changed completely!

Unfortunately, your wife is not very lucky with her choice of husband. Sorry for your wife.

She dares me to do my worst,she cries over small issues that i wonder if it's witchcraft.Or she thinks I can't quit cos she's got two boys for me? The mind boggles. Am just mad and gobsmacked at the same time as all my Red pill O.T have failed and am even considering divorce right now.

I'm at a bar drinking my sorry ass away, brainstorming the best option for me. What could be outta place?

I need candid advice,folks.

mariahAngel:
It's corn season. YaaaY!!!

Corn is a very popular street snack in Nigeria, and I doubt there's a Nigerian who does not like corn.
As for me, I always look forward to corn season.
I like my corn boiled, but I can't decide between ube and coconut, which I prefer to pair with my corn.

Team C


So, how do you prefer your corn? Boiled or roasted?
Which is your favourite pair?

Picture credit: Instagram

frank33:
Thanks. From Google maps though, these places seem very far from town. I wonder if one will truly feel like he's living in Abuja

booksbo0k:
Sorry for the long write up my people, I need advice.

My first son has been behaving somehow in our family, as if he's not part of this family...
You and this boy can be in the same house but you might not set your eyes on him once for a whole day. He will be inside his room through out...

He has been telling me that he is currently working on going to rent his own place and live on his own and that if God helps him and he is able to achieve that, He will not have anything to do with our family again and that we will never set eyes on him ever again :[ ...

I would have not been bothered by such statement if it were coming from someone else, I would take it as a bluff. But this my son is someone that normally doesn't call people to check on them, not even us his parents..

When he was in his previous University before he dropped out, this boy can go for months, that is a whole semester stretch without calling anybody to know how you're doing, except you call him or maybe he wants to ask for money for something or school stuff....

We have five children and he is the first, the second and third children are away in University, he and the two last siblings are the only one's with us.. My husband refused him from going to University in a far place instead he gives him transport money to be going to his own University from home everyday...... He and his father don't even talk again except good morning greetings. He is only 21 ohh..

Let me give you guys small back story so that you can understand how all these things started.

My son graduated from secondary school (a boarding school) in 2017 at 16 years old... Initially, he said he wanted to study computer science as he said that was the course he loved and wanted to study. But my husband refused and persuaded him to study pharmacy because he worked at NAFDAC and he saw the way pharmacy graduates were living at his work place and the salary they were recieving. He and one of his chemist friend sweet talked him into going to study the course and I guess it was because he was young then and could not challenge his dad then that was why he gave in....

He wrote JAMB but he did not meet the cut of mark for pharmacy (but I later realised his score was good for computer science then)... No public University was willing to admit him for pharmacy then because his score was not good for the course but due to my husband love for the course and not wanting my son to lose admission that year , he decided to go the way of private University not minding their school fees...Long story cut short, my son got admitted into Madonna University where we were paying 1M naira every year.....After 3 years in the school and in 300L @18 years old, he began saying he was not interested in the school any longer, that he was tired of the course, that he's body is no longer in the school and blablabla that he wants to go and play football in Europe...

He came back for holiday during the beginning of covid and refused to go back to the school when they resumed, saying that he was only wasting our money by being in that school and he did not want to continue.....This got my husband really sad and angry....My son stayed home for almost two years doing nothing because my husband was adamant that if he would not go back to school, nothing for him, that all the money he has spent for school fees in that school can not be for waste that he can become a footballer after he graduates, saying no one can become a successful footballer without being a graduate, that it would later affect them in life...

But my son refused. I must confess, my son is extremely good at playing football. That was the talent i can confidently say that God personally gave to him from birth. Infact when he was graduating from secondary school, they gave him the award for the best graduating footballer and he was always the centre of attention anytime he plays at our church events. He friends used to call him "nima" then, I think...

I and my husband got tired of him staying at home for long so I went to meet with one pastor in our street who was based in the UK with his family but comes home sometimes for church related matters. I explained my son's situation to him and he offered to help my son travel out to chase his football career provided we have the funds for it. The man was secondary school class mates with "victor ikpe ekong" who was a former super eagles player but currently a pastor in Sweden. To my greatest surprise he called him on a WhatsApp video call in my presence and i was really surprised...He gave me the man's phone number to keep in contact and also scheduled a day to meet with my husband and have a discussion.. I told my son and he was very happy..I also told my husband and he was eager to meet with him at least, anything to solve my sons idleness at the time..

The pastor came to my our house on several occasions and discussed with my husband. My husband kept telling the pastor, saying he would like my son to be going to school while chasing his football career at the same time, a feat which pastor let us know would be difficult as one has to be dropped for the other. Unfortunately, my husband changed he's mind and said he was no longer interested in the whole footballer thing. He said he knew that my son wanted to become a footballer only because of girls. That he, my son knew that if he becomes a footballer, all the girls would like him, that that was the only reason he wanted to become a footballer, and that if football was his true destiny, he doesn't need to travel out for it to manifest, that he can be in Nigeria and make it from here.....That was how that chapter close like that. Pastor left for England few months after.....

After years of my son staying at home, my husband got tired. One night, he hired some Street thugs to come take my son away and beat him up...my son stayed with them for 2 weeks. When he returned, he said he was ready to go back to school. But my husband told him he won't be going back to any private University again. My son wrote jamb again to study computer science and was admitted into COOU. but my said he would not allow him go to any University that is not in the same state we are residing. Now the problem here was that all the public schools in the state we are staying will not accept you to study computer science unless you did chemistry in jamb. And my son did not do chemistry in jamb because he is not good in chemistry. If he was to study in the same state we were staying, he had to settle for another course, which he did...Now another problem arose. My husband refused to rent an apartment for my son around the school because the school is considerably far from our house, instead he decided to be giving him money (2000) everyday as transport fare to be going from home. This did not sit down well with my the boy and he again, said he was no longer interested in schooling again sef that he can't be going such far distance from home to the school everyday to study a Course he does not even like siting that it would be stressful and affect his academics and that it was unwise to be paying 60k a year as school fees while you spend 2k everyday as transport..My husband got angry and called on our estate CSO to come pick him up. They beat him so badly in public that when he got back home later in the evening, I went to check him in his room, his buttocks and back where scarred and red with huge marks...

Ever since, he has been going to the school from home and he has become very distant from us especially his dad. They don't talk again in the same house except "good morning sir"...

My son has turned into something else. He can stay indoors from morning till night. I would have said he has started keeping bad company but he does not even have a single friend, not one..Nobody calls him, and he doesn't call anybody...I have five children and he is the first. The second and third already gained admission this year in a private University and are in school currently, so he and he's last two siblings are the only one's with us now..

Why I'm writing this is because I'm scared..I'm beginning to fear that my son might commit suicide, he's beginning to show that kind of attitude.. And the plans he have to leave us forever to go and stay alone, I don't like it ohhhh...

Nairalanders please I need your advice.

BigYash:
Asthmatic patients ,please avoid it.. You can use other vegetables o.. E get why..

Alesa3341:
Hello Guys, please I need a sincere and matured advise on what to do. This will be long, please bare with me.

I'm 27, am a businessman, I have this girl I really love so much and intend to marry her this year December, but one thing about her is her bad character. She challenge me, talk back at me, shout at me, get angry with me for days, refuse to cook when she is angry, disrespect my family, most especially my mum, always trying to paint herself good and paint me bad in presence of people, these are just little of the things she has done to me.

When she lost her job, and had nowhere to go, I had to bring her to my house, and provide everything for her, food, I change her hair twice a month, subscribe unlimited for her, I just provided everything a woman need to be happy for her. Last year November, she told me she haven't seen her mum for 5years and wanted to travel to see her, I spent close to 200k to take her to and fro, including other things she needed. She insisted on collecting the bride price list for me when coming back, I spoke to her mum and they gave her to give me. I was planning to finalize all on the weeding this year.

Last year DECEMBER, I took her to my family to introduce her, but this was the biggest mistake of my life. She was completely disrespectful to my mum, talks to me anyhow in presence of anyone, even to the extent of refusing to cook for me anytime she is angry, I go to kitchen and prepare food myself.

I love this girl so much but I still thought of continuing, with all this attitudes, I advise her everyday, I also took her to my pastor who advise her too most of the times, but she never changes.

Fast forward to 2days ago, we had issues because she told me to join her in washing and I refused because I was working on a client project, she got angry, washed the clothes and when it was evening she brought the clothes inside, folded her own in the wardrobe and just threw mine into the wardrobe without folding or arranging them. I was angry about this, but I kept mute. The next day, she sent me "sorry" on WhatsApp, I told her to come to me physically and apologize but she told me she can never do that, and why was she even apologizing, that she did nothing wrong, we exchanged words and she left my house.

Today, she called me and told me she is pregnant, and that I should send her money to remove it. I was like "just like that"? We didn't discuss about it, how will you just tell me you want to terminate my pregnancy, I told her to go to hospital and confirm it and also get the test report, she did this and sent to me, it was true she is pregnant, but she insisted on removing it, I persuaded her and she still refused, claiming she can't be a single mother. I told her I will take responsibility, but she insisted on removing it, I told her to go home and think about it, and she told me she can't leave there without removing it. After so much persuading I decided to give her the money, and told her if she removed it, that it's on her, that I didn't consent to this.

I asked her why we can't keep it, and she said because my family is bad, we support evil, if the sky is blue, we say it's red, that my mother is a bad woman, and she doesn't want to come there. She said so many bad things about my family, I was shocked! I asked her, how are they bad, she said "how can my mother be telling her to wash my clothes" I was just confused, After all I have done for you, is it bad if you wash your husband to be clothes, I left her!

Later she told me the doctor referred her to another hospital, I still tried to persuade her and she said her decision is final. She asked me to give her money to go to the hospital she was referred to, I refused! I insisted that we keep the baby, she told me "I'm a nobody, that she will call now and she will get money to go" I angrily blocked her. Later, she called my other line and told me, she went to the other hospital and the doctor told her, the cost to remove the pregnancy is 125k, she told me and I insisted on keeping the baby.

Please guys help.me, I don't want to terminate my first child, the girl is too disrespectful and rude, I don't want to continue with such woman, but she is carrying my baby, what do I do? And if she later agree to keep it, how do I go about it?

You all are just saying "don't marry her" what about the baby? Should I agree to abort it and give her the money?

MODIFIED

Bhusawlah:
Morning moms, please I'm a first time mom, would love to join my team, I'm 22weeks 4 days as at today, I'm team march. no frequent urination, my bump is just showing a bit, I don't know If I have noticed my baby movement cus I don't know how it feels, was told I have an anterior placenta according to my last scan, I stopped using the drugs given to me around first trimester because they gave me headache and make me weak. I feel okay as at today so I'm hoping everything is fine.. I hope I do not need to be worried

yemeshak:
Good day everyone, my wife is 5weeks pregnant.

She has been weighed down by the pregnancy and I had a belief that it is too early for the pregnancy to be weighing her down. Pls house how soon does pregnancy symptoms start?

Also, at what week do we start antenatal?

Maggi85:
I am a norwegian woman. I met my nigerian boyfriend 4 years ago. After being together for 2 years we decided to have a child. We didnt live together at that time. After giving birth to my girl he moved in with me. He finished his masters the same year. Then covid 19 came, and he losts his job as a restaurantworker. He had to get money from the state (NAV), and he managed to have money for food for himself. After a little while he decided to start delivering job. Then he had around 10 000 kr a month. Also worked the whole summer. He continued with this and then started norwegian classes. I got used to being the only one with income, and he only paid 3000 kr a month. That was going to help with half of kindergarden.

Time went by, and now since may he has worked every day. Delivery job and also some small engineering jobs. Every day he is away. Stille he only paid med 3000 a month. Last month I asked kindly if he could increase it to 5000 kr a month since i pay all the bills. He got angry and said he didnt had the money from work yet. Next month i tried again. He got angry again. But it didnt work on me this time. Because I knew that from may to july he has worked even 12 hours shifts as engineer. After almost kicking him out he finally paid me 5000 kr. At least he has 25 000 kr each month in income. 5000 of 25000 kr is very small. I use 35000 every month on our expances. Paying for the apartment and so on.

His answear was. "If im going to pay more, than I have to sign contract so that i also own the apartment". I told him that if he only has the opportunity to pay 5000 a month, it shows me that he cant afford to own anything here.

After living 2 years for free because of him not getting a job, corona and so on this is the way he thank me. In fact he should at least pay 10 000 a month. Electricity, kindergarden ,houserent (we have houserent when owning a house in norway), food and clothes for the child, household articles. Instead he only starts arguing about small money that i ask for.

My question is. Is this nigerian guy trying to use me?. Does he have these kinds of jobs on purpose so that i would be comfused about his income (running his own company, getting jobs here and there.. no consistancy). He also refuse to let me se his account. I asked him where the money is going. He didnt want to answear. Just that he bought some shoes. (They were cheap).

What is clear to me is that he doesnt want to use money on us, unless i beg or ask hundred times. After two days he finally gave them. So he had the money all the time, just didnt want to share it with me and my daughter.

His family in Nigeria have never been giving my daughter any gifts or money. My parents have done everything. And me.

He bought birthday gift for her, but not much more than that.

He goes to work everyday. Doesnt want to use more than 5000 out of 25000 of his money on us. Also never have time for us because of all the work. Yesterday he talked about that he want another child with me, and that money is never a problem. And that I should knew when i got pregnant with first baby that he was in that situation with no money.

I said to him: but i expcted you to get an engineering job, not waiting for years to get one. And also now you have a job. After that he was just starting yelling at me, that he wanted to talk to the udi, that he miss his mum and dad and sisters and brothers in nigeria. That he didnt believe it would be like this.

Its like he expect me to have more than one kid with him with no economically security, or security that he will help me out. I have been much alone with my girl. Every day he works, also in vacations when im off (Im working full time as a teacher) work, and in the weekends he spend both saturday and sundays in church. My daughter is welcome in the church, but not me. He doesnt want med there. And I dont know why. He is saying its because im not a christian. But before he wanted med there.

There is something going on behind my back. Thats for sure. He wants med to give him another child, but he doesnt want to contribute more even if he can. He never do familythings with us, im not welcome in his church.

2 weeks ago he said; maybe we should get married this year. I said to him but with what money?

I dont get him. Is he just testing me? Is marrying me a way to secure himself so he can stay in norway? is getting another child also the reason for getting more years in Norway? He can save a lot of money when he lives like he does now. Not paying much. If he lived alone in Norway renting an apartment, he would have to pay around 10 000 a month , and the child costedy around 4000. So 14 000 a month. Now he pays 3-5000 a month..

And also maybe he will not get to stay in norway according to rules.

What would you do? Show him the door?

Thank you for listening to my story

Amakapritty:
Oya now
Team December where we dey?

WalkerMichael:
Can you make a similar amala?