₦airaland Forum

Ujujoan:
Sometimes its better not to say anything that to add 'petrol' to the 'fire'! "Silence" is golden . . .  maybe she should try that approach sometime.  

What an apt comment, never has any true words been spoken, but methinks the information coming on the back of the attack on Tpia is where this should be direected to. . .

The sole reason Chioma opened this thread was to seek help "silently" to prevent her parents and the world from knowing. . .

How many private universities are in Nigeria?

How many 24 year old non-igbo girls are currently in their final year?  

How many of these non-igbo girls are currently absent from school for one reason or the other?

How soon till someone clicks on this link and puts two and two together for tongues to start wagging and the news starts to spread like wildfire?

How would any parent then feel knowing thousands or millions got to find out before them?

How soon until everybody sabi wetin we cook wey burn the house down!

Etc






@Idowu
If that was the first thing that Tpia said, then I would see where you guys are coming from, but it was the middle of a "private conversation", hence reason you . . .er. . .ekeyofuros (and that's putting it mildly) got the wrong end of the stick And I hope say you too get insurance oh, cause I am sure you sabi the end of that ekeyofuro meaning, hehehe Because if motor jam that bakassi of yours and punctures it ehn, my son nor go recognise you as his wife anymore oh, abi where you go take get another gravity to sway those hips wey my son marry you for So take ya time oh

Anyway pumpkin, all I am saying is Tpia is the least of what is wrong with this thread now. . . I hope she can return back to school before her already suspicious Lecturers starts smelling a rat sha

Idowuogbo:
@BB
Hmmmmm Iya oko mi,u call calling sum1 cold blooded directly thinking aloud? maybe na me no understand Anglais oo.Anyways like I said after ify posted d gist,she should have toned down her harshness.

As per d microphone dis wan am seeing na swaroski oo,d wan I bought u was pokulowo ee.

Well ID, if we learn to separate fact from fiction, the thought of someone saying they want to give up their child should send spines tingling, but we all know why in this case that our backward "notice me" culture - is to be blamed in this situation. And Tpia only said this as part of the dialogue ensuing between myself and her . . .so if you look closely, you will the silent "but surely this is" prefix before the word "coldhearted" and you should also be able to see the "?" at the end of her comment  

Shush keep your voice down jare, na penkelemess microphone i dey use joo, why you go see with that ya come-to-bed chinko eyes that my son can't get enough of

Idowuogbo:
Iya oko mi u fit borrow me dis bling bling microphone u dey use lool.Jokes apart I wasnt forcing my opinion on Tpiah,I jus felt after d feedback from Ify concerning the issue she could have bin more accomodating.Although I b pikin but omode agba ni mi,won ti taba fi owo gba omo leti ka tu fi ikeji fa mo ra(I no sabi d english so sum1 translate kwanu).Yes d poster has done d deed but it would be very insensitive to trash here also IMO,but hey may be everyone has ways of dealing with issues sha.One small cloud can't conceal a sky full of stars,chi might be perceived as cold blooded now but no1 knows her heart except her Creator.

Anyways Badosky don talk her collabo o,na waoooooooooooo.

Nor be you take me go shopping spree to buy the bling bling microphone to bribe me when you were still toasting my pickin ni, oruka ti de owo innit, so why would you not be mouthed .

My post was addressed to everyone on Tpia's case, not just you oh iyawo omo mi atata Moreover, Tpia was not really condemning the act but doubting the authenticity of the story hence reason she was thinking out loudly, by the way it was some other people that were preaching about morals etc.

Ujujoan:
This issue has been treated on this forum before. Just because someone decided to bring his/her problems to this place doesnt give us the right to be insensitive.

It's one thing to express her doubt about the truth of the story (which has already been confrimed by Ify), and another thing to be downright insensitive. If she hasn't evenr been in that young lady's shoues, she has not right to call her 'cold-blooded'!

You wan try how many people dey forum and the rate at which members come and go, so how is one supposed to know what has been treated before? Besides it would be preposterous for everyone to toe the same line of reasoning na?

Saying this though, all Tpia was driving at was that she was in doubt and was just deliberating, and if for example like someone said that was her headache, why not allow her use the medication she deemed fit to cure herself, and if this involves talking out loudly, so be it.

Ujujoan you be Naija na, how many people have become jaded about helping people to the extent that people no longer stop at the scene of an accident for fear of their samaritan deed blowing up in their face! No be say people just dey shake head waka pass dey go their way ni!

firestar:
^Chei.
Lol.
Calm down babes, you're spazzin'!

Babe, stop jeluxing me, if you just wake up to discover yourself in heaven just like i have, wouldn't you be delirious and giddy with effervescent joy too

Chai see suya and pounded yam with ogbono growing on trees, chei, I am definately in heaven for real  

Gotta run, nah I mean gotta soar and glide through the air (this Heaven is taken some time to get used to I tell ya) anyway say hi to your fellow earthlings on Planet Earth for me will ya

Tpia has the right to express her cynicism anyhow she deems fit, if it does not bode down well with anyone, kindly gloss over it. How can anyone think it is right to attack people for their opinion by trying to ram down their own opinion down their throat, what happened to freedom of speech and tolerance anyone

Who knows what is going through Tpia's mind as she is typing this, who knows what plans she has in mind and what she is putting in place to help this girl but only want to be sure of certain facts? Afterall Tpia is a Christian and her Bible says not to let the left hand see abi know what the right hand is doing, and not to be like the Pharisees who stand by the street screaming about whom they have given alms to Na wa oh, na real wah, hmmm.

[quote author=tpia@ link=topic=851929.msg10028053#msg10028053 date=1327315926]Big bumper

the title of the thread is who wants a baby girl.

This girl is cold blooded.[/quote]I am aware of this Tpia, but you gotta remember since she decided not to abort that baby, she has been conditioning herself mentally to give her up for adoption, which is a commendable feat because she could have gotten a termination.

And like i mentioned earlier, someone telling me she would love to go and be visiting her baby every week in the babies' home in Fadeyi, all the way from her school in another state is not cold-blooded, just numb and paralysed with fear Plus any orphanage she ends up in would have to eventually notify her parents to give them a first right of refusal hence reason she initially discounted going to one.

debrief08:
I didnt direct that at any one oh, was simply stating that after solving this issue we can have enough room for scolding, heavens knows if my baby sister (if i had one) did this i would toungue lash her after working out a solution.
Not al all in anyway refering to u dear

I understand you dearie, only replied to clarify cos i know some people don't like reading long stories and they could start putting together 2+2 to get 10. . .Sorry for talking over you

jennykadry:
I lived in Lagos and I tell you all, that some parents can be very very strict. Grand child or not cannot change anything.

If na me, na to enter dry well with the baby be that, and if they want to rescue me i will tell them i have disgraced them in front of the whole world so they should just let me go. . .and if they accept and one day start talking down on me, i would tell them they should have left me to rot there then. . . and if they refuse, nor be the same neighbour dem dey worry about go come rescue me come call them wicked for abandoning me inside the well ni. . .if they want drama i have got it by the bucketload. . .

The bottomline is that most Nigerian Parents are often like this because of the perceived shame that child has brought on the family name. . .forgetting the child is still a child who is now with another child who is their flesh and blood.

Happy Birthday babycakes

^^^

debrief08:
I agree, I have seen girls pulled ouut from school and forced to marry someone they dont love cos they got ppregnant, and lived pretty miserable lives for both them and d child. Thats why i consider that the parents may be a bit strict for her to go thru such lenghts to conceal the pregnancy and the baby. we can blame her all we want but now its time to find a way forward. Its her decision , all we can do is to offer information and alternatives, she came for help when she could have gone to her parents in d first place, lets thread carefully

who is blaming her here, all I have said is people brainstorm, cos she does not want to give up her baby, but she is scared of telling her parents

[quote author=tpia@ link=topic=851929.msg10025884#msg10025884 date=1327287830]your story keeps changing each time you're asked something.


and for someone in supposedly dire straits, you sound very calm, collected and with a well thought out plan.


not characteristics of a person who just gave birth, sorry.

being nl, no doubt something fishy's involved in this storyline.[/quote]Her contact detail is there somewhere.

There is a baby and a mother in physical pain.

She is a student in another State.

She only ran to Lagos to have the baby.

She has been pregnant 8 months and since she decided not to spill her baby's blood on the alter of self, like her mates would have, and despite all the intense pressure she faced to go and flush out the baby, she must have gone through every conceivable emotion under the earth, hence reason she appears somewhat detached and calm. Afterall she can't run away from her body.

All that is foremost in her mind is finishing her course of study this year. I proposed she made fortnightly journeys to see her daughter in the proposed babies' home in Fadeyi. She vouched  she would make the journey weekly, God willing, meaning she wants to keep her baby but is scared of Mum and Dad. And finishinging her course will help her get a proper job so she can come back for the baby.

Now the non-glaring issue now is that she needs to eat because she is breastfeeding. Despite all the demeanour of calmness you can perceive, all she has been eating for the past 3/4 days is "glucose" Reason for this - story for another day. I tried to rally round for help yesterday from an elderly friend but all I heard was "third mainland Bridge and traffic and the day they would 419 you and hypnotise you, ehn, and allsorts". . .But she reassured me a friend was on her way to her and she will get her to bring some food . . .


YOU DON'T HAVE TO TAKE ANY OF THIS INPUT ON BOARD CHIOMA, I am just thinking out loudly here. Like I told you, you are not the first and you would not be the last. And when I hear stories like this, all I ask is "has it stopped the world orbiting, nope, so the world should move on and thank your lucky stars you only have a baby AND NOT AIDS", afterall they are gotten through the same mean


Now the main issue is helping her in brainstorming when to broach the subject to Mum and Dad. The reasons for parents dissapointment usually centres around she has dissappointed us/after spending so much to let her have a better life/what would the neighbours think/what would people say/we have failed her as a parent. . .

So to help, does any one have any idea when it is a plausible for her to tell her parents?

I personally think if she texts Dad, (not Mum, she will be hysterical and all over the place and Dad might even blame her that she must have known) - so if she carefully rearranges her story and texts Dad saying "I am in a Hospital in Lagos, and i am so weak i have not eaten in 3/4 days but I don't want to die anymore Dad, sorry for bringing shame on you". . .all Dad would think at that time is that "my poor baby is somewhere other than she should be and i need keep it together and appear strong in front of Mum". . . of course he will call and when he detects Chioma is in genuine distress, race to her bedside with Mum. . . and when they get there and discover their baby has another baby. . .who will have time to think what the neighbours would think. . . And on the rare occasion that it crosses their mind, this will be brushed away with the more morbid and forboding thoughts of "she was so scared to tell us, we could have lost her and the baby". . .

God bless you Momma Chaircover, may you always know what's up and may your days be long, chai, see food, food, glorious food, Nigeria is blessed with food, haba But you people are taking this too far na, how can you bestow such a posh beautiful name as "Jennifer" on Jennykadry when are real name is Mrs Jemilatudeen Kabiru

I see you rocking that turquiose bodycon dress with your baby pink stilettos, Mrs S

Has anyone seen the birthday girl, I haven't seen her around for the past 3 weeks

^^^
Now that's the spirit Mrs S, that's more like it, don't forget to tell Mr S not to stay up cos its gonna be an allnighter, now let's go show 'em what these two left feet of mine can do on the dancefloor, roll on the p-a-r-r-r-t-t-y

jennykadry:
^^^yea yea, I thought you were over this new way of telling me you love me ,anyways you were always known for beating around the bush instead of hitting the nail on the head.

I LOVE YOU TOO, STop telling me you love me before people begin to suspect. . . .

[s]Holding chlorofoam soaked hanky behind back, there is no way I am gonna allow Jenny attend this her birthday party, that would teach her   [/s]. Thanks a bunch pumpkin, come here lemme give you a hug, I knew I could trust you to keep a secret safe

Dude, you are being played, end of. They can't be together for obvious reasons so are using you as a standby generator, so berra wise up and shine ya eyes Why do I suddenly feel like giving you a backhand slap

ziddy:
They're still having a sex.ua.l relationship. Once debe. . . .everlastingly debe :-)
You are no better than a pi.mp for walking into this bizarre domestic arrangement with your eyes wide open. You had to be approved by him? Joke is on you boy your wife played you for a mugu
Try & have se.x with his wife if you can at least you guys would be on the same page since he is so obviously fu.cki.ng your own wife (with your permission though)

This is h-i-r-a-r-i-o-u-s, especially the last paragraph, tsk tsk tsk

Richvkunt:
@BB,
Sorry about the last post of mine.
You saw what she was saying.
I am gonna be ignoring her and her lackeys from hence forth.

I understand no one likes being taken for granted. . . so thanks once again Richvkunt for the gentleman that you are. Now go and strut your stuff, and hey I "see" you smelling of roses


[quote author=Mrs. Siena link=topic=841533.msg10022121#msg10022121 date=1327242925]Richy, Chaircover, Sisi Kill and Jennykadry you guys should just drop this and move on its no use insulting or passing unwholesome comments back and forth pleaseee.[/quote]Party over here Mrs S, let's go shake what our Momma gave us

Richvkunt:
@Big bumper,

You are very matured in your analysis,though I feel you try to sit on the fence too much.
I will give your request consideration.
However you should advise that baying pack,to sheath their blood red talons and un bare their blood stained fangs.
I might not agree to a truce next time.
And tell them to leave all the newbies like agiboma alone,they are entitled to their own opinions!

That's why I have been telling you I am returning back to base. All this sitting on the fence can be boring frankly, I'd rather be standing on the fence occasionally throwing petrol bombs to douse any simmering tension and be chanting:

"what do we want
truce
when do we want it
now"

And thanks for heeding the call for a truce, you are a real gem of a gentleman Phew

chaircover:
BB you try jare but I beg to point out one tiny weeny small error LOL. Current Season 100 episode who knows what started on post 115. . . . .as usual

For a while now, I have treated richy like an annoying mosquito, ignored him and left him to buzz around, hoping that he will eventually buzz off out of the window but he seems very persistent and I have decided to zap him each time he buzzes round me.

I wont be far off if I say that 30% of richys posts that I come accross in the FS mention my name. What is the obsession I wonder? He has made his point so what is this constant harping on the same song for?

Two can play the game and if he wants to disrespect himself and follow me to the market, he will surely meet me there.

Stay your lane make I stay my own lane.

Awww, its alright sweets, but hopeless romantic that i am, all i can say is . . .do you guys see what i am seeing. . . all i am saying is there is a thin line between love and hate oh. . . oya group hug everyone, and to show all is forgiven, can we invite Richvkunt to the event we have been planning all this while - JENNYKADRY's BIRTHDAY PARTY, and guess what Armyofone is the caterer, and boy does she know her bokoto from her shaki, yay

Hmmm, I see the "let off steam thread" has relocated here Excuse me Mr Ticket Inspector, can I have a couple of executive ringside seat tickets please

[s]See disgrace, see as this enigmatic Richvkunt take reverse psychology make me publicly and shamefacedly confess say I bribed some ladies with a million Zimbabwean currency each. . . mschewwww[/s]


OK, one needs to have a massive dose of patience to be able to do what Chaircover does, which in itself is a virtue, which is a gift, so seriously, there is no competition here, I don't have any serious bone in me so can't keep this up so would be returning to my previous username once Mr Spambot gets the message that I have dumped him and releases my mischievous busybody ID which allows me to push the envelope, test the boundaries and derail and break rules to my heart's content and rebel, afterall if rules were not meant to be broken, their wouldn't be deterrent or punishment. . . so in essence my selfless charitable self is just testing the effifacy of Nairaland rules for them free of charge too oh, to make sure the "time" fits the crime and rule breakers are effectively punished

Biko Richkunt, ok I know na Chaircover throw the first banger, but e don do with all this back and forth thingy na, I for call you agbaya regardless of the fact that I don't know your real age, [s]but I nor bold fit like some deluded people with their " Nigerian" birth certificate that has induced them into stating they are 23 years old. . . but would set off any bone dating scan machine within a 1000 mile radius of wherever they waddle to. . . [/s]But don't push your luck though Richy, because as a Chinese National, me sef get a "Chinese" birth certificate stating my age as "unborn". . .due to China's one child policy. . . well blame my parents nacksonmaniac spirit. . . They gave birth to 18 of us you see. . . 

And hey, listen up whilst some of us women are here hollering thinking that we have whooped ya arse and are relishing rubbing your nose in it, you men are blessed with brains and the tunnel vision to gloss over mundane stuffs and all you can see is some buncha ladies yapping and yacking away and furiously punching away at their keyboards which is water off a duck's back to you. . .

You haven't said much about your personal life, you have never ever had a bad word to say about your ex (though I detect you can fill a 2 page sheet in 10 seconds), but from the one line you have only talked about your separation, and from the fact that ^{all you are surreptitiously doing here is teaching us that "us women have the option to stoop to conquer without loosing our identity of sense of self and can still be allowed to fulfil our own desires and pursuits within the constraint of marriage, without being bitter ",} I can highly detect the problem is not you, but her . . . and even if the fault lies with you, so what. . .which one of us can say we are perfect. . . when one door closes another one opens, and God sometimes needs us to let go of something we are holding on to, to give us what He really has for us. And like MissyB's quote says "some people are only in our life for a season for a reason. . .

ThiefOfHearts:
bigbumper. shey you want me to break your head? abi legs? pick one 

What what what where is the fire

You people should let me sleep na

Why wake me when Van Vicker was just about to kiss me

Na wetin sef

Oh ok, I am so sorry I spelt your name wrongly

Honestly I am genuinely sorry from the bottom of my heart

It will never happen again I promise

Oya give us a smile

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .



   
[s]Getting back into bed in annoyance

Shior

Na wetin sef

Even if I spelt the name upside down, it is still a shite unimaginative name

So why the noise

Abeg Van Vicker come back to continue serenading me o jare
[/s]


TOH, na this sexy big head of mine wey resemble Adelabu's coffin you wan break, na which set of sexy stout solid stubby yam tuber leg which resemble those thick thick yams the Igbo dey take do brideprice you wan break, una fit catch wind, mschewww, abeg excuse me pass jare

Fine gyal looking selentiously skenzy, elenurazor-extraordinaire, ma bu mi oh, shey mi jeje please, plus I am female, plus remember today is a holy day

Drnoel
Ask hubby when wifey's withdrawn mood started or when he noticed it.

I dey suspect you oh OP, on another thread you dey talk about parent in law and your Mum catching you and wifey in a hilarious compromisingly funny sexu.al way yet you can't share with wifey. Note - you didn't say cos wifey is shy but cos she might get angry

Induced labour might mean she would be retained in Hospital longer, hence higher Hospital charges, hence would need financial help to be discharged, so the more this gets delayed the higher the bill would go through the roof.

debrief08:
Hahahaha, u better oh Moremi cos even ma son has learnt the trick. Recently he had a quarrel with his dad, can't even remember over what, he went downstairs to Grandma and reported his father. My Mother In Law listened and told him don't worry I will talk to ur father and d boy went back to call his dad downstairs took him to Grandmas room and told her oya talk to him

Sharp boy Awww, children and hilarious stuffs they come up with sha, and i bet even if Grandma wants to use slippers he will tell her he can go and help her fetch the cane instead

jennykadry:
Lol debrief you son don sharp finish. See pikin reporting his father.


@odunnu
My date is today but I am on call

Ohhhhhh Jenny let me sleep na, and stop waking me up every five five minute that today is your birthday joo, did you think we were born and came out the same way as normal people ni. . .we are in Yabaleft for a reason. . . when will you learn to connect the dot dammit. . .now move over to your side of the bed abeg

And for the umpteenth time, you are not on call, you are on drugs

maclatunji:
^I am not sure that we 'retreat into caves'. Can you expatiate on this? I am interested in learning more about what you mean.

BRB, don't hold your breath though. . . as per you know us ladies when we say "we are coming" I will be back seriously

Chioma,

You heard that, contact Chaircover ASAP.


Modified to add: Okay you've done that, phew.

Forget all that jazz up there, IGNORANCE IS THE KILLER DISEASE ERADICATING NIGERIANS BY THE BUCKETLOAD

Idowuogbo:
Iya it don tey wey I no na mamagee,but as long as she's onila we go yab am  till we stupour loll.

Mamagee aka onila asewo fajin how borri?

Nor let her turn her fine gyal no pimple self on you oh.

My son's wife, how are you and that spotless yoyo skin of yours, my pickin go return you back to sender if you come with just one spot or blemish oh, so look after yourself well for my pickin until he is ready to send for you. Sorry about the delay and you not being able to move in before the new year, he is still deciding whether to move his toy train or toy car to the gardenshed to make way for the mat you are going to be sleeping on, I am sure you understand his babycot is not big enough for the two of you to share Na because you be understanding woman my pickin chose you out of the 30 finalists of wiflets and kokolet

[quote author=tpia@ link=topic=848381.msg10010043#msg10010043 date=1327086060]Not sure why nobody has made the connection between onila and mamagee because i think they sound the same.

@ topic

tales abound of such transformations.

Eg the ugly duckling, etc.

https://a4.mzstatic.com/us/r1000/037/Purple/20/88/35/mzl.jdquxgdq.480x480-75.jpg[/quote]You aren't known as the sharpest and shrewdest mind on NL for nothing Whilst Mama Gee retains the crown as the person who has the capacity to gloss over insults without flinching or getting one strand of hair outta place Mamagee aka Miss-why-doesn't-Chelsea-ever-play-with-the-Premier-league-team-instead-of-clubs-like-Stoke-and-Wigan

I believe you when you said the story is about your cousin, cos of the lopsided way you told the story He must have lamented this same story to you over a million times hence reason you lost the plot and are at wit's end

Your cousin, the Hubby is a wuss. He thinks its the make-up sex that is the issue but in reality it was the nasty thing she said about his Mum and family and his equally nasty response AND THE WAY THEY SWEPT IT UNDER THE CARPET that is plaguing him. Words are like eggs, once they drop that is it.

He KNOWS he is sitting on a keg of simmering searing gunpowder which will potentially ignite someday hence reason he feels the urge to talk things out with wifey. . .

The good thing here is that they both love each other dearly so need to find time to thrash this out apologetically. It can't be comfortable living with someone who harbours hatred for his Mother, the woman who brought you into this world, especially hatred he was not aware of until "that fight".

claremont:
No, I think the average "rozzer" is a fat, unfit, f-ucker. If I told you what I do, I may have to kill you.

Shoot, abeg spill, we are all gonna die someday eventually, or as i like to put it one can step out of one's front door and get run over . . .^gulps

Awww, this is the stuffs tear-jerkers are made of

Wishing her many happy returns of the day

chaircover:
Idi ayunre, kuro lona jor kin to fun e ni backhand.    

I have a very funny feeling that my daughter will end up like you. Chai the girl sabi talk.  We have t beg her to keep quiet so we can concentrate while driving so we dont crash 

Anyway todays coven meeting is starting at midnight. Dress code is fuchsia pink bum shorts which everyone must wear including our single male member   

Well, well, well, we all know men don't talk as much as us ladies hence their "o tun ti de oh woman yi kini problem eh this time" (una don come again oh you this woman na wetin be ya problem this time), plus according to the British Medical Association (BMA) women suffer from more jaw pain at a rate that is 4 times more than men, meaning YOUR DAUGHTER GOT IT FROM HER MAMA

Funny enough I hate typing and prefer talking on the phone. . .and the record number of hours I have been on is in double figures But it is not that bad anymore since I only average just a mere 4 hours on the phone at a stretch nowadays

Can you come again and remind me in bold size 20 font the person you were referring to in the last line cos er. . . It took a long time but I have finally conceeded that I need goggles and cos its the weekend I have to wait till monday

THE RISK OF LOVE - Kris Hydmore

here is a risk involved in everything
Every time you share a smile
Every time you shed a tear
You are opening yourself up to hurt.

Some people tread slowly through life,
Avoiding the risk closeness brings,
Side-stepping the things they can't understand
Turning away from those who care too much,
Those who care stay too long,
Those who hold too tightly.

There is never an easy way to love
You can not approach it cautiously
It will not wait for you to arm yourself.
It does not care if you turn away
It is everywhere, it is everything.

Love is the greatest of all risks.
It is not reliable, it is not cautious,
It is not sympathetic
It is unprejudiced and unmerciliess.
It strikes the strongest of mind,
And brings them to their knees in one blow.

Even in the best of times, love hurts.
It hurts to need, it hurts to belong,
It hurts to be the other part of someone else,
Without either of your consent.
But, from the moment it overtakes you,
It hurts worse to be all alone.

The risk of love never depletes;
It grows stronger and more dangerous with time.
But, it's in the total surrender of all defense,
That we, no matter weak or strong,
No matter willing or captive,
No matter what, we truly experience love.

Despite the many things love is not,
Outweighing it all are the things that love is.
Love is surrender without a loss.
It is a gift without the cost.
It consumes your every thought & desire,
Every breath you take.
It is the fire that fuels you
To do more than pass through life;
It urges you, instead, to live.

No matter the outcome, having felt love,
You will never be the same.
It may scar your heart & soul
And Leave you only memories of forever.
Or, it may cause every day of your life
To feel like there is no need for tomorrow.
But, love is worth it. It is worth the risk,

For in all of life,
Love is truly the only risk worth taking.

2buff:
Not exactly. That attribute also points to lust.
Only the saturated "mainstream" mind thinks that any of such reactions automatically = love.
That word is so bastardized now that I'm not sure I'll ever use it.

I'd rather tell someone I love: "I believe in you" than "I love you" because of this fact.

i believe in you ke, hehehe

Here's a perfect definition of the enigmatic word LOVE culled from here. I will also post the best POEM ever on the subject which I think best describes it and will subsequently try to explain this.

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-289440.0.html#msg4104965

No2Atheism: ove does not change
Lust changes
intimate attraction changes

Love does not fade
Lust fades
intimate attraction fades


Hence why u love your father, mother, siblings even if though u not sexually attracted to them normally (for a normal family).
Hence why u love your wife even if she is starting to look like a cow that makes her unattractive sexually.
Hence why u love your husband even if he is starting to look like a slob that causes him to become unattractive sexually.

Contrary to popular opinion, you do not choose to love. The truth is that Love grows on you towards someone with time, hence why i find it annoying wen guys and ladies talk rubbish by saying they love each other or wen they say there is love at first sight. That is bullshit.

You can't love someone immediately.

Love takes time to grow.
Once love for the person develops it would always be there, even if u no longer attracted to them sexually.

It is intimate attraction and lust that fades if its not nurtured.

People let us understand that it is fundamentally wrong for us to say that love fades. This is because a very good example is the love between a father and a child. It never fades irrespective of circumstances and issues. Hence why they say love coverth all sins (if it fades as people wrongly assume then it means the sins would one day become exposed). Hence why they say blood is thicker than water. This is because the fundamental love between the father towards the child and the child towards the father transcends issues of lust or attraction or circumstance.

A mother would still love her child even if such a child was convicted for murder. that is love

There is nothing like motherly love.
There is nothing like fatherly love.
There is nothing like Man and Wife love.

The love is basically the same in all cases , the only difference is how it is expressed (e.g. it is expressed in the form of sex between the man and the woman as a result of the presence of intimate attraction and lust, thus why u find that even though some old couples no longer Be Intimate wtih each other yet they completely love each other, that simple shows u that though the sex and lust might have faded, yet the love still remains).

Hence in final submission,

TRUE LOVE DOES NOT FADE.

Lady Winona:
Lol. That is my prayer too and thanks.

Now thats what we want to see, more laughter from you. You are not a slut, otherwise your conscience would not have hauled you before the ever-judgemental, ever-critical Nairaland court and you would have just chopped and clean mouth. So oh ye brave and courageous Lady Winona, hold your heads up high.

You know what as well, you could have come here saying he beat me whilst pregnant . . .but you didn't, you are a good person and a selfless person and i pray God dry your tears and take away all your painful past memories

chaircover:
Now you see the dilemma.

I have a number of friends who are going through hell with their partners but nothing you tell them makes any sense to them. I have come to realize over the years that a woman will only leave when she is truly ready and strong enough to (its a personal thing and we all have different thresholds) and as a friend all you can do is to support them and be there for them if they have told you that they have chosen to stay and try and make it work or they give you a thousand reasons why they think that they should stay.

From experience, some of these marriages get better and some get worse; it’s difficult to predict which one will get better or which one will get worse so one just has to be there for ones friend whichever way it pans out.

Na so we see am oh Alaga Chaircover, back in the days women didn't have no choice, but these liasons took a lot of planning and travelling back and forth, but nowadays despite the awareness, technology has made things worse. Now it takes minutes to arrange these sexual liasons cos all the dude has to do is click on a lady's link on facebook, say a few nice words, swap numbers with her, book an hotel room or call one of his friends to pretend they live together and take the lady there. . . unbeknown to th e hapless lady that na married man.

And these men even those who beat women are refusing to relent because they ask themselves "our parents too did the same, and our mothers too went through similar, unbeknown to them that now things are no longer done under the guise of darkness and Mama Sikira must not catch me oh. . .and from travelling out and from technology us naija women are now more aware that this is not the norm elsewhere in the world and we have some rights too. . .