Profidada: When will likes of Austin oniwon, deziani maduekwe, ahmadu ali, rilwan lukman have their own share of plane crash ?

You are wicked down to the tiniest fragment of your DNA..no matter how despicable we feel these people are there is no justification for wishing em dead especially by a plane crash.

kcprince: Is there anyone in the house that Got an admission to study at heriot watt dubai?Please contact me for some information. I just got an admission there for Msc in Petroleum Engineering.My number is 08033649339

I did...i got admission der to study Msc petroleum Engineering..i am supposed to start by september 2012
Lets relate maybe we could help each other out with information

Thisisikoi@hotmail.com
07032334342

Interesting thread,most helpful!

Ok so i gained admission to study MSC petroleum engineering @ Heriot-watt Dubai.i actually studied Petroleum Engineering @ FUTO nigeria...and i graduated with a 2'1.am actually supposed to leave by september this year .so i wonder if there is any information,tips,advice etc about how 2 adapt 2 the life in abu dhabi.

What are my chances in dubai assuming i complete this program and will wanna get a job there.

I will really appreciate inputs from folks on here.

Thanks

y2kaustin: He reiterated that it should not be misinterpreted that government cannot give Nigerians light,that is why he is launching the bulb........Drunkard!!!

You noticed dat too..lol. And to think that ive been using this bulbs for like 5yrs now..

I appreciate in-puts from both parties but i will have to agree with the MOD and i have reasons.i had an application from a lady in lagos and from her CV it was apparent to me she hoped to manage a "modern firm" with offices etc.
I quickly gave her details of the whole farm and well..your guess is as good as mine.

That was when i decided to elaborate on the current state of the farm just as a primary "screening" process and its working.right now i have a very interested applicant and a couple others.

I'll hint the house when i give the job out to the succesful individual.

@ all thanks for inputs

So i thought to warn NLnders
Though am sure ders been similar warning on here in the past.
Theres a bunch of retards posting a scam message about GTB account update.

Its a silly cheap scam,so please ignore this email whenever u see it.

PalmTree:

Apologies for my assumptions... There are so many fake people/vacancies arround these days.
Now that we know you actually need the workers, you will still have to subscribe to some of the ideas in my previous post.
1. I did not imply that you go through the proccedures as do other big coys but you can still make a selection for a far lesser cost. For starters, you could just as easily post the vacancy on NL using your email addy for correspondence. Trust me you'll get enough response from qualified/experienced applicants. You may also try other job search blogs.
2. Go through the mails recieved with a pressumed parameter in mind for your 'standard' selection ( I'm assuming you have an idea of the right person for the job) pls lay more emphasis on experience in a similar outfit as you may not be able to afford training costs/time.
The nos 1&2 above depend on the time and energy you can devote to d process.
3. The interview stage... When we get to that brigde.. We go cross am.
I'm sure that you are probably wondering why I have said all these despite reading your OP, anyways I'm of the opinion that the condition of the outfit should not be disclosed until when you av shortlisted the most suitable candidates. Then you can test their overall ability by asking them how they intend to run the outfit considering its present state. Lastly your father is right you gotta conquer your carreer man!
Once again, I'm sorry for my previous assumption.

No pawn taken!!
To the best of my understanding i have already complied with your point number 1..my ad is thread in the "jobs" section on "nairaland" containing my email/mobile number for correspondence!! See we are at par as far as dat is concerned.


And i have to say i have received a couple of enthusiastic respnses from intrested NLnders..i just might be getting close to finding me a manager yet..

O and on the experience part.i think you are right.i'll keep that in mind,i'll be better off with someone who already knows his way around an oil palm mill.


I appreciate your points..they have helped me re-allign the whole process.i have an interview with an interested applicant..

Thanks again

shedrackijeabom: do you sel palm fruits? i buy palm fruit and mil it myself in delta state. If you do kindly reach me on 08031968681

We do not sell palm fruits. We harvest several thousand bunches and mill same in our mill.we intend to "upgrade" our techniques by introducing up-to-date technology and i realise if we dont have the right individual managing our farms.our efforts may be futile.

We need a manager and workers and if you can assist me with those.i'll appreciate

PalmTree: Are you sure of what you are saying? Or you are just trying to gain fame on N/L? If your claims are true then why dont you save yourself this stress? Just put out a vacancy and let people apply, then you can select the most qualified using standard proccedures. Let me know if you find my post helpful then perhaps we can work something out... I'm not qualified for the job though

First i am not seeking fame on NL as i fail to see how fame on NL is beneficial to my existence.

I believe i stated its an unconventional offer. This business has not risen to the stage where we would carry our recruitment processes as the big companies do.
Its my family business and i appreciate the need for a proper manager and i decided to throw it open to nairalanders. i wont exactly say your post has been helpful but i am willing to know what we can work out as u said.

however i have to state here that the advert is for a business set in a rural community a village in cross river state .assuming i decide to hand you this position,you will be required to adapt to rural life settings which the average person out there may not find desirable.

Akam ekombe nig ltd is not a big company but a medium scale enterprise with potentials of expanding into a large scale industry.

You will be required to manage the whole farm spanning about 100acres of yielding oil palm and you must be able to do this profitably and efficiently.
While our profits are rather attractive,the would be manager will be expected to partake ,somewhat, in the extractive process using our current equipments pending when our procurements process for modern equipment pans out.

Honesty is the most important clause here .i neednt say more
You will be required to manage rather local/illiterate work force on ground as well as assist the company recruit more staff.
You will be required to manage our resources such that we reduce losses due to wastage/theft to the barest minimum..(Our biggest problem now)


If you are willing to accept these challenges..subsequent discussions will be held with you and the proprietor my dad where salaries accomodations as well as any other incentives will be discussed.

Ikoi Ferdinand.

Please let me add here that the would be manager will be expected to outlay a simple plan he intends to implement to turn things around in the business.

This plan should include recruiting workers(their welfare is sole responsibility of the company)

And any peronal ideas from any relevant experiences he hopes to introduce to the company to assist us move forward as well as achieve our goal.

A simple email will do !!

Thisisikoi@hotmail.com

07032334342

I am making an unconventional offer for a vacant managarial position in my family business


My dad owns about 100 acres of already planted and yielding oil palm estate, this estate is situated at EKORI,YAKURR LGA CROSS RIVER STATE.my village!!

Challenges:

Over the years in the course of exploiting this business my dad has had to cope with a lot of challenges ranging from lack of workers/incompetent workers/theft by locals/workers etc
and as a private individual with no governmet assisted grants etc it has been really challenging using our not so efficient extractive techniques,coupled with the dearth of dedicated workers/manager and our losses have continued to increase.

-we've never really had a proper arrangement where we have workers dedicated to work with us to achieve our goals.and when we manage to get workers..the person managing the business fails to give them the right motivation and they end up stealing and running away abandoning the business.we have had workers come and go many more times than i care to remember and the break in continuity is bad for our business.

This challenges notwithstanding this farm rakes in a very handsome profit still as we make @ lease 2000rubbers of fresh palm oil monthly and judging from the current price of the commodity i can say the figure is encouraging .this leaves for the imagination what we can generate if we have the right individual in charge..


-i dont need to underscore the
profitability of this venture its a massive farm and we have not even started exploting kernell etc.

.Recent developments:
currently my dad whom by Gods grace is now very active in government is making major procurements through world bank assisted loans. We intend to expand our mill,improve our production by introducing latest technology,we intend to commence crushing kernell and this is a mid-term goal as the long term goal remains refining our produce to finished/packaged goods fit for consumption.

I am a petroleum engineer and cannot be around now to play a role in our family business as my dad discourages this. We seem to agree that its best i "chase my career" and be seen to have conquered in my chosen endeavour hence!

I am making an offer for someone who understands what is needed now and is willing to take up the challenge.
There is no minimum qualification here specified.
Its a farm with potential. We are turning the business around and i know with the right individual who can key into our vision and play the desired role..i believe prosperity will know no bounds.

I will appreciate it if interested persons contact me on

thisisikoi@hotmail.com
07032334342

The offer remains open till the right person takes up the vacant managerial position

I am making an unconventional offer for a vacant managarial position in my family business


My dad owns about 100 acres of already planted and yielding oil palm estate, this estate is situated at EKORI,YAKURR LGA CROSS RIVER STATE.my village!!

Challenges:

Over the years in the course of exploiting this business my dad has had to cope with a lot of challenges ranging from lack of workers/incompetent workers/theft by locals/workers etc
and as a private individual with no governmet assisted grants etc it has been really challenging using our not so efficient extractive techniques,coupled with the dearth of dedicated workers/manager and our losses have continued to increase.

-we've never really had a proper arrangement where we have workers dedicated to work with us to achieve our goals.and when we manage to get workers..the person managing the business fails to give them the right motivation and they end up stealing and running away abandoning the business.we have had workers come and go many more times than i care to remember and the break in continuity is bad for our business.

This challenges notwithstanding this farm rakes in a very handsome profit still as we make @ lease 2000rubbers of fresh palm oil monthly and judging from the current price of the commodity i can say the figure is encouraging .this leaves for the imagination what we can generate if we have the right individual in charge..


-i dont need to underscore the
profitability of this venture its a massive farm and we have not even started exploting kernell etc.

.Recent developments:
currently my dad whom by Gods grace is now very active in government is making major procurements through world bank assisted loans. We intend to expand our mill,improve our production by introducing latest technology,we intend to commence crushing kernell and this is a mid-term goal as the long term goal remains refining our produce to finished/packaged goods fit for consumption.

I am a petroleum engineer and cannot be around now to play a role in our family business as my dad discourages this. We seem to agree that its best i "chase my career" and be seen to have conquered in my chosen endeavour hence!

I am making an offer for someone who understands what is needed now and is willing to take up the challenge.
There is no minimum qualification here specified.
Its a farm with potential. We are turning the business around and i know with the right individual who can key into our vision and play the desired role..i believe prosperity will know no bounds.


In summary:
the advert is for a business set in a rural community a village in cross river state.the possible manager will be required to adapt to rural life settings which the average person out there may not find desirable.

Akam ekombe nig ltd is not a big company but a medium scale enterprise with potentials of expanding into a large scale industry.

You will be required to manage the whole farm spanning about 100acres of yielding oil palm and you must be able to do this profitably and efficiently.
While our profits are rather attractive,the would be manager will be expected to partake ,somewhat, in the extractive process using our current equipments pending when our procurements process for modern equipment pans out.

Honesty is the most important clause here .i neednt say more
You will be required to manage rather local/illiterate work force on ground as well as assist the company recruit more staff.
You will be required to manage our resources such that we reduce losses due to wastage/theft to the barest minimum..(Our biggest problem now)


If you are willing to accept these challenges..subsequent discussions will be held with you and the proprietor my dad where salaries accomodations as well as any other incentives will be discussed.
You will be required to make time to visit the proprietor in calabar to have this discussions .

I will appreciate it if interested persons contact me on

thisisikoi@hotmail.com
07032334342

The offer remains open till the right person takes up the vacant managerial position

pappy2000: its good that we have this but we have to understand d inner workings of the market

I love you bro..u are a God sent... Could we create a facebook page and everyone of us newbies/enthusiasts can "like" the page....then we can be recieving your newsfeeds/tutorials/updates as facebook updates....just my humble submission

Gooday all!!

my big kudos to Mr Bendazum(hope I got it right)

I am new to the bizness... Av learnt about starting and I intend to start bettin on my virtual account .

I however suggest,for the benefit of all newbies that the PRO's create a facebook page and all of us can go ahead and "like" the page. So whenever any alert or "call" is made by BEN or anyother PRO in the house,every "fan" of the page can get it as a new update on FB ...I really think this will help a great deal...I am suggesting this for those who may not be able to subscribe to BEN's SMS service just yet...

@ben and other PROS...what do you guys think...is this idea a "winner"..?

bendazum: After careful consideration of the issue at stake I will like to make a proposal. From 30th of April-1st of June,2012 running from MON-FRI I will be dropping alerts at exactly 4am Nigerian time in this thread.The stakes will be strictly on EURUSD and will last for 4hours. I therefore would like someone to accept the responsibility of opening a demo account with betonmarket.He will use 50percent of it to enter anytime I make a call and STICK to it whether he is losing or winning.At the end of the period,let's see how much he made.After it we can then know if your proposals will be granted.That's my take on the issue.

Goodday!...I am a newbie to this kinda bizness and I am already getting to appreciate your contribution...however I wonder if there is anyway I can get to know what this bet-on is all about... A sorta run down... Or anything a rookie should know before delving in... I am. Ready and willing to stake some money on dis of course relying strictly on your "calls"

Please reach me soonest on thisisikoi@hotmail.com..

I appreciate in anticipation

Cheers brov

dplordx:


Mad man

Now you must be the other guy!!

Negro_Ntns: John Akpabu was not a suicide bomber. He was part of a staging for a dramatic event at a future date. His detection and arrest were choreographed.

May your days be long and happy o wise one!! Finally a just and upright mind on nairaland

ken4th: Mr. president pls try and increase your speed and ability to act on issues fast. if facebook feed backs are important to you, then act fast and take strict, tough and stringent decisions now. just imagine the blood sucking demon Gen. Buhari is threatening for blood again in 2015, and he is still a free man. no arrest and no questioning, oga please wake up.

-just a few weeks back about N2.6Trn of OUR collective resources where discovered to have been stolen by a conspiracy of men and women,all cronies of the man GEJ yet no arrest made,no sacks,no heads roll infact theres a clear intent to sweep the matter under the rug....

Not everybody will be able to travel to inspect items been paid for that's d idea behind E-COMMERCE in d first place..to provide a virtual platform wer goods are bought/sold without necessarily requiring a meet by both parties.

Early 2011,I bought me a blackberry on Ebay and I paid 250euros for it paid shipping cost and the phone was sent all d way to me here in calabar..am actually using that blackberry to post this comment, not a single complain.that's d beauty of e-commerce that's HOW IT OUGHT to BE if IT MUST GROW in NAIJA!!!!!!

My point is issues like dis flies in the face of e-commerce transactions, let's face it how do we expect to grow this industry if sellers cannot at least be a lil bit more truthful. NAIRALAND owes its users a service to verify this ads/ads owners, NL is entitled to a small cut from every successful transaction via its platform hence it owes itself as well as its users a duty to verify claims and protect its integrity.. Every other similar platform of e-commerce does dat.

Finally ,at the risk of been harshly critical of damola1,I have to say Seller was dishonest from onset, a clear case of deceit. he's been here and contributing to the thread only goes to show he is indeed a smart guy and knows exactly what he is doing, and I know the game he is playing and he already got "fans" on here.
he is humane though for bothering to reply cos it will be easier to just disappear from the "radar" so I'd add seller has integrity and may yet be good to do business with in future depending how he handles this

so Let all the NLnders sympathetic to damola1 ask him to arrange a meet with buyer, 2geda they both go and check d vehicle out, access the cost of repairs for said car To be brought back to original condition before sale ,assess already incurred expenditure on the part of dissatisfied buyer resolve the monetary differences and seller should make a complete immediate refund. I won't add compensation cuz buyer is only mildly culpable for trusting "Nigerians" on e-commerce. And let nobody claim "busy" as if seller intends to redeem his battered reputation, he should go all outta his way and do this already!!


Talk is too too cheap,damola can keep blowing hot air here nobody ever figured why shylock couldn't take his pound of flesh back ,how is buyer gonna go about returning the car "back to how it was before sale"..dats the catch and damola1 knows dat too well..

Lesson: naija has not reached the stage where u can trust someone physically not to talk of online matter so all potential buyers beware.

2.Let NLs CEO decide whether he wants to run e-commerce transactions and actually take steps to ensure honesty and intergrity cuz money is involved and he stands to gain/grow this site.

Lol @ OP

Sometimes I wish I was in position to conduct a nationwide survey of what nigerians think about their president and be able to broadcast same so the president gets to see/hear what nigerians think of him... He'll have to laugh at himself too..

"Slow poke" "clueless" johnadull"retardeen"jonadunce"johnaram"foolish"densehead"retard"cretin"fisherman"drunken fisherman"woman wrapper"foolish"....meeen the list of colorful names is long and hilarious..truly In my opinion this here is the most vilified president in nigerias sad pathetic history...

As much as I would love a clean win to barca 2nite ,still I have to say an obvious foul in d box or mean tackle must and will be called . I used 2 imagine success has many friends,beats me how a successful team as FCB has so many haters.just like when a young man makes good money..haters go.."Its his papa money"....na juju he do"...its yahoo yahoo" etc.
Chelsea just got a very controversial goal against tottenham,no complaints!!!.der r times when referee decisions seem 2 favour ManU in d EPL...o dats okay!,when FCB is the subject,.haters go "referee Dey favor them"
Fact is chelsea is a very good side,FCB is d best,if chelsea players get physical as they are akin 2 doing the ref would have 2 call it.same goes for barca players.
FCB will keep winning untill the last of their most unfair and biased critics get skooled..its game on 2nite let the better side win.

bayooooooo: NOI's intelligence is overrated and it's no surprise now the extent of incompetence that GEJ's administration continue to display to the consternation of the whole world. Is it not the NOI's of this world that are the so called "egg heads" in his administration? The failure of the administration is now becoming easier to explain as GEJ himself, a clueless leader, has wittingly surrounded himself with failures left, right and center. A woman that willingly agreed to add failure to her CV has failed more than failure itself.

She has worked in the bank for years. She knows the rule before entering the race. China did not support her, Russia would hear none of it.Brazil said count me out, Japan said mbanu, Europe said don't even go there. But the subsidy lady whose only economic policy she was taught in school is how to remove subsidy on the first day of January embarked on media frenzy deluding herself in the vain endorsements of New york Times , FT and Economist and at every opportunity reminded doubting thomases she remained African candidate. Angola, Congo, a very discredited South African Regime, Nigeria (who perhaps need her more than the world bank if her so called prowess is assumed to be true), Malawi, Togo etc, I no fit laugh o, were supporting her bid.
Even Ghana could see the doom in her bid and rightly said count me out!

Even attempts to inform the irredeemable jingoists and unrepentant tribalists here on Nairaland of the vanity of her bid fell on deaf ears. Perhaps they thought PDP would rig the election in her favor. For a country so mired in monumental economic woes to be fighting to head world bank presenting the supposedly messiah of her economic recovery team speaks volume of intellectual poverty that is afflicting they very top leadership in this country.
Did he not go to Washington to beg her to come and become Nigeria de facto prime Minister and the turned around to willingly send her back to a position that's largely symbolic and would add nothing but woes to Nigeria's economy?

Infact, let GEJ take an IQ test and publish the results for the whole world to see. He is the most incompetent, clueless, confused character to have ever been the Nigerian president. Colombia did not bother to even support a foreign based "player" who was campaigning for what's not achievable. That's a strategic country.

The same clueless characters are now campaigning for 2015 when we have not even spent the first half of 2012. The same characters are manufacturing patently laughable security reports to discredit credible opposition while the epicentre of violence, they should be fighting, widens day in day out with the incompetent team headed by the clueless leader dishing out prophesy on daily basis on how the menace would suddenly disappear in June.

--finally a daniel has come into judgment,may you leave long o just on!!!e.-----

I am the direct PA to a top Niger delta strong man and he's been favoured with an oil block.
I need a confirmed authentic buyer,no long stories,no unserious contacts please.
Only serious contacts should reach me please, and I mean this.
I can be contacted on,07032334342, 08151945355,or email me on thisisikoi@hotmail.com.,,I have to stress here that its a legitimate transaction and I only want a serious buyer or his/her mandate. There is some honest cool money to be made here,

Do i have to smoke all those pro GEJ youths outta the wood work or are they gonna be bold enough to come out and take a stand on this or are they just cunningly avoiding a debate that obviously will embarrass them

You see just when I begin to feel maybe the criticisms on GEJ are getting a tad bit unfair,BAM! He surpasses his previous "milestone",he scores another record all time low.

So the government cannot afford to sanitize the subsidy program and spare us the ish pending when our refineries come into full action yet this same government sees none wrong in proposing to spend all that money to feed just two nigerians.

So GEJ cannot feed himself off his already bloated salary? Can't sambo feed himself? So tax payers will pay this two "ten headed,blue blooded" Nigerians fat salaries and still scratch out close to a billion to feed them to do what?.

Well let's see what the senate has to say about this,

The president and his deputy will together enjoy N992.57 million worth of food and general catering services in 2012.

According to a detailed analysis of the N4.749trillion budget the president presented to lawmakers last week, the cost of purchasing food stuffs, catering supplies, kitchen equipments for the president and his vice, and their offices, will cost the nation N992.57 million, about N7 million away from a billion naira.

http://premiumtimesng.com/index.php/news/3165-jonathan_sambo_to_spend_n1billion_on_food_in_2012.html

For all those pro GEJ die hard fans here's something to chew on.
Your "Icon" whose been going around chanting the mantra of "fuel subsidy removal","the economy will crash in two years","we cannot borrow to fund our budget",, and all what not has proposed to spend almost a billion naira on feeding his humble "once shoeless" self,and his fat chubby vice.
I won't be surprised if somebody crawls into this thread and attempts to justify this glaring display of flagrant attempted waste of public funds!!.

@beaf;
Okay ,what do you have in mind, !

@beaf,

I will like to follow you on twitter, there is somebody I will like you to meet. He also has very keen interest in the socio economical well being of nigeria.

I'll leave the rest for twitter land
Kindly follow me on @unclecycs or the said friend of mine on,@ekekeee or kindle let me have ur twitter userID .

Looking forward!!!

I laugh in "fuel subsidy removal"!!!
Riddle! Riddle!!Riiiiddduuuuullllleee!!!
Q:why does president jonathan always wear a black
calabash on his head.
A:because an empty bottle/pot looks terrible without
its cover.
Q:how do you make a certain 3 year old dull
"JONATHAN" grow up 2 be a smart and decisive
leader
in future.
Ans: buy him a dozen shoes,teach him to wear real
hats and not black calabashes,conduct a groin
surgery and fix him a new pair of STEEL BALLS!,
maybe throw in a heart surgery and replace the
chicken organ with a real male heart!!.
Q: how do you put some shine in the eyes of GEJ,in
the midst of all his current troubles.
A: simple!! Just flash a torch light through his ears!!
Q: why did GEJ die of suffocation in his barbing
saloon?
A: he was listening to a song that goes "breathe
in,breathe out"breathe in,breathe out" on his
discman and his batteries died off.
Q how many GEJ's would it take to screw in a light
bulb in aso rock villa?
A:10 of dem!!!
Q how they gonna manage that?
A:1 GEJ to hold the light bulb in place,and the
remaining 9 GEJ's will try to spin aso rock around till
the light bulb is in place.
Q;why didn't GEJ fall off his balcony in aso rock villa?
A:heck! He ddnt know the directions!!
***just comic relief***

I laugh in "fuel subsidy removal"!!!
Riddle! Riddle!!Riiiiddduuuuullllleee!!!
Q:why does president jonathan always wear a black
calabash on his head.
A:because an empty bottle/pot looks terrible without
its cover.
Q:how do you make a certain 3 year old dull
"JONATHAN" grow up 2 be a smart and decisive
leaderin future.
Ans: buy him a dozen shoes,teach him to wear real
hats and not black calabashes,conduct a groin
surgery and fix him a new pair of STEEL BALLS!,
maybe throw in a heart surgery and replace the
chicken organ with a real male heart!!.
Q: how do you put some shine in the eyes of GEJ,in
the midst of all his current troubles.
A: simple!! Just flash a torch light through his ears!!
Q: why did GEJ die of suffocation in his barbing
saloon?
A: he was listening to a song that goes "breathe
in,breathe out"breathe in,breathe out" on his
discman and his batteries died off.
Q how many GEJ's would it take to screw in a light
bulb in aso rock villa?
A:10 of dem!!!
Q how they gonna manage that?
A:1 GEJ to hold the light bulb in place,and the
remaining 9 GEJ's will try to spin aso rock around till
the light bulb is in place.
Q;why didn't GEJ fall off his balcony in aso rock villa?
A:heck! He ddnt know the directions!!
***just comic relief***