₦airaland Forum

dubylhover:
who are we to judge

^^^^^^ Exactly!! But we judge people who are different a lot in Nigeria. Don't we?

raayah:
I would say an adulterous person ( Man or woman ) is the absolute worst. Having sexual relations with A married person is just so low.

I will put the 80% of the blame on adultery on the married partner because he is the one who has decided to break his vows.

To multiple abortions. I dont understand how a full grown woman will decide to use surgical procedures as a method of contraception, when there are tons of other methods. I will say shes stupid.

So, am I wrong if I say that the much resentment on Lesbians by those those ladies who are in adulterous relationships is quite hypocritical, if according to you, they are worse. Majority of our law-makers are addicted to adultery, but they passed a law to punish gays and lesbians based on morals ...

Africans are very judgmental about Gays and Lesbians on the basis of religion bc we always claim it's unbiblical. I am not one, however, I am one of those who don't give a hoot what people do with their lives as longer as it does not put other people's lives in danger. For instance, if you like you can cut yourself with a razor but please don't stain my walls and pavement, because paints are expensive!!

I want to throw this question open. Considering that it's almost difficult to get a girl in Nigeria who's an adult living in a township who has neither had an abortion, had a steady sugar-daddy, nor had one type of adulterous relationship or the other with a married man,

Therefore, between a lady who is in a Sugar-Daddy (adulterous) relationship with possible abortions and a Lesbian who is worse?

I expect to be e-stoned here

An0nimus:
Everybody is to blame. Schools, parents, students,government, society. E-v-e-r-y-b-o-d-y.

This topic is painful.

From all I read above...practically the Nigerian society rewards mediocrity and indolence. So where is the change going to come from?

Sijo01:
Okey! Are you directly or indirectly saying you're schooling./schooled or based abroad

Yes! do you have problem with that?

It saddens me to see the level of intellectual discussion by majority of Nigerian graduates especially those who studied at home. If the contributions and discussions I read on (blogs including NL) is a true representation of the quality of education in Nigeria, I weep and cry for Nigeria. I can now understand why elected officials shop abroad for people to fill key appointments. Nigerian banks hold job fair abroad to hire competent workers while there’s serious unemployment in Nigeria, expatriates refuse to fill key technical positions with Nigerian graduates; practically no serious bank or company in Nigeria today does not set aptitude test to retest the competence of Nigerian graduates. Even those who hire them hire them as ‘Graduate Trainees’ to undergo further training before they can be allowed into a sane corporate environment.


You can hate me or chew me but it doesn’t change a thing and will never affect the perception of the world about our graduates. Has anyone ever read what some Nigerian graduates write as English Language? How about in-depth analytical discussions that require thorough research and investigative skills? Most will shy away from intelligent discussions and rather bring in annoying sarcastic comments like “Na you sabi”, “Carry Go”, “na Godwin”, “the hussle is real” (by the way it’s ‘hustle’ and not ‘Hussle’) etc.

As an example, I watched a group of Nigerians argue and tear themselves apart over Mrs Buhari’s alleged claim that she donated N140Mil worth of drugs to IDPs. I watched with awe how highly educated paper-warriors could not decipher the difference between ‘Worth’ of a material donation and actual cash donation. I tried to weigh in that most pharmaceutical companies abroad could donate multi-million dollar worth of drugs as long you have means to cart it away and ship. So that my boss gave me $10mil worth of used laptops to donate to my community does not mean I either donated $10mil dollars to my community or have $10mil (this is just for emphasis. I am not defending anyone)

I will encourage our young men and women to spend more time/energy on self-improvement than follies, fun and fraud. At this rate, Nigeria may remain under a perpetual servitude under the developed economies. You need to discuss with youths from those countries to see the difference. How can we ever catch up?


If you are a young Nigerian graduate and truly can defend your certificate intellectually and hands-on, I want to use this opportunity to say “May God bless you and bring you to the fore on merit above the egg-heads who rely on connections and intimidation. Keep up your hard work! God will bring merit back to Nigeria one day and the egg-heads will have to compete to survive”

This is not an aborted baby. It was killed after birth. A baby this size can only come out of the woman either pushed out, by caesarian or mutilated inside the womb and evacuated in piece.

The tile is is A child murdered shortly after birth. This could also be by a sugar daddy who didn't want the baby.

Sir, how does someone with $1.2mil have time for Nairaland? I really envy you. I wish I could have such a biz where you make such a money and still have this type of time.

Luvlystar:
Story for the gods

when u read blogs you can tell girls raised / living in Naija and those live abroad. Not to discredit anyone, but any1 who forms issues with an inspirational post like this, may God not allow that person to live or come near my neighborhood IJN! fellos be careful who u date & bring home some are walking bombs.....

u can shred me on NL..I care less!

dre11:
I won't say you can't learn one or two things from both old and young




Its the person that is being the advice that will sieve the ones to take
There is this adage in my home town that says "omode gbon.... Agba gbon, ni a fi da ile Ife"

So, out of their no sense comment you can still find some sense in it but the application might be different.

You are right. I am trying to highlight that people should delve into areas they have expertise in and not spill dangerous poisons called advice.

BaebieHot:
Yeah right, am sure all the old people are wiser than Methuselah and all the young people are very dumb.
The fact u haven't experienced something does not mean you can't give a few reasonable advice here and there.

You should knw by now, Nairaland is dominated by the young, if there are any old people here at all sef.

So, those few advice you said were reasonable were probably from guys and ladies not up to 26.

And again, why will these older people put their life problems on a site most especially Nairaland if they are so wise.
I agree with you, many nairalanders here will make a joke practically out of anything but if you look closely enough, there is always a good advice.

P.S if you think u are so wise and/or you don't want advise from younger people, then don't ask for it.

I gave credit to the few good posts too. I did not condemn all. By the way who told you there are no experienced old people on NL yet you saw Fani Kayodi posting on NL? Abeg he was a minister! U dey play with NL ooo! .

Recently NL front page has been awash with relationship advice and marriage how-to's on what could easily pass for riddles/ jokes . Obviously Nigerian's are living upto their name as 'copycats' and 'best speech makers who fail on actions'. A little in-depth research into these write-ups shows that most of them (except for a few from experienced married people) are either copied off foreign relationship sites that have no relevance to Nigeria's environment or written by a bunch of heart-broken teenagers/ college students who out of boredom and loneliness spend much of their time online, browsing.

1. They Lack Experience: How could one who doesn't know how to drive; doesn't even have a driver's license teach people how to drive? How can someone who has never kept a steady date with one person for a year suddenly turn to a relationship adviser? How could one who has never married suddenly become a marriage counselor? You have never carried pregnancy before, never changed diaper in your life yet you are online talking about what a woman wants and what man wants in marriage. Haba!

2. They are full of fictions: Marriage is one thing you can never master by reading novels and watching romance movies. Every woman is different; every man is different. There's no formula for a successful marriage apart from "study and understand your partner and give him/her what he/she wants." Which means until you have that man/ woman you can't know what he/she wants. What worked for Alhaji & Alhaja Balogun may not work for Igwe & Lolo Okoro. Everybody's situation is different. If you can master marriage through reading why do PhD holders in psychology, senior pastors, successful businessmen/women fail in marriage?

3. They assume everyone has same goals in marriage: People marry for different goals. There are retirees with grown-up kids who remarry for companionship. There are divorced people, widows/widowers who marry to have step-mother/ step-father for their young kids. There're people who marry to have kids for inheritance, there are people who marry to gain political connections, there are people who marry to solidify their business ties, there are people who marry their academic research partners to remain a team, some kings marry to expand their territories, others marry because someone got pregnant and therefore forced to marry, some marry just to monopolize a handsome/ beautiful body, some even marry to travel out, get work permits, green cards, etc. So how do all this tonnes of advice online fit each of this situation?


4. They use religious justifications to heat up their thread and get 'Like': Baba Aladura had his reasons for marrying multiple wives, while Pope has his reasons for not marrying at all yet they all have teaming followers. Osimili chief priest has his reason for prefering a young virgin, while 'social guru' has a reason he wants a lady with bedmatic skills/ experience and doesn't like virgins. Emir of Kano has his reasons for marrying more than one wive, etc. How can one tell the other he's wrong? Fela sang "me & u no dey for the same category"

5. It's all about bloggers getting traffic and 'Likes'. Inexperienced bloggers try to make money by driving traffic to their sites because they heard that's what made Linda Ikeji Rich. Who told them traffic is equivalent to money? . Sorry kids! I'm laughing at you all in Swahili if you think you will get rich by not acquiring useful skills and look for a good job rather sit all day posting rubbish and pornography on a cheap website in the name of blogs. Why do you think universities have a degree in e-commerce, and e-business? Mtcheew!

I must commend few posts that were quite educative and informative. You could tell they were written by experienced old-hands who shared their personal experiences. For others I think you kids should settle down and read your books before you start blaming GEJ for all your life problems.

".....Please me and you no dey for the same category......" - Fela

SMH

When I read NL it's amazing what prep-occupies the mind of an Average Nigerian when their country is burning. Always cars, b.uttz, b.oobz, marriage, and craps! These will become leaders tomorrow & guess what they will use govt money on? SMH

I suggest not now till after elections. Enough abandoned projects! Even after elections invest more on our Universities first to produce quality graduates...upgrade the labs and curriculum and get rid of paper-tiger, partisan, lecturers. Who will run the plants for Nigeria - the Chinese?

I care less about this elections in Nigeria anymore. The elected leaders will end up being exactly the same Nigerians we know and deal with at home in businesses around the world - corrupt, greedy, arrogant with insatiable thirst for material things with very poor values, surrounding themselves by their fellow cultists as advisers and inner circle. So-called APC members are same decampees from PDP. So a naive person thinks they changed because they changed party and hold brooms after looting as elected PDP officers? - A Nigerian is a Nigerian. Period! SMH?

Please let them bring peace back to Nigeria, that's all the common Nigerian prays for at this time.

whatever we think about them...we elected them so whether we like it or not na we put dem there, we are under obligation to stand by them. 2015 is coming, many Nigerian youths running their mouths here on NL are set to sell their voting rights for peanuts and work as thugs, tomorrow they will start talking rubbish about elected leaders. Use your votes wisely, it's the only power u have over an elected leader and the only time in ur life he/she will beg you for something.

Ooooo Please can we usher 2015 in with some seriousness?

Hmmmmmm!

I thought the definition of literacy is the ability to read and write. morever read and write could be in any language including Arabic, Ibo, or Swahili) (not just English Language) I thought General Buhari reads addresses he writes?

Anyway Professors, sir, can we hear the manifestos and plans to stop insurgency, corruption and create employment for youths by the two candidates and not name-calling here. Anyone who could read those lengthy articles you guys are writing is definitely not an illiterate, so I am not, therefore no one can fool us. Back to issues on the ground.

Haba! Players score goals at FIFA tournaments, maybe she wants you to score goal on her. Dude, get the message. Wise up Dude and go buy tatashi, add viagra and cialis if you want. The turf is ready, wet and slipeery for 'Fifa tournament'. You don't need boots, play without and make sure you dribble right into her 18-yard box before you shoot. No matter how good a goal-keeper she is, you will score except you are Yakubu... oya she is ready......

One more celebrity news on frontpage ehhhhh, I will.....Modupe! Modupe!! Modupew!!! where is my koboko?....lazy girl, you look like your mom. someone needs a whip at Nairaland's office. tell your mom I want to go buy moi-moi, i dey come back now (hiding koboko in my bag).

Aaaaaaaah! Again Celebrity news on FP?...please show us a collection of where she sits on the toilet seat.....Nairaland please learn a lesson from American businesses. They listen to their customers. Enough of all this petty-minded posts except they are paid adverts. Otherwise.....haaaaa!

Why are we too into the biz of these celebrities? Nairaland Front page is filled with their pictures, their kids, their girlfriends, their wives, their kitchen, their dogs, their cars, when they entered, when they walked away, who they slept with, who they dumped, haaaaa! Haba! I thought they said great minds discuss events, while little minds discuss people?....Nairaland are you turning us all into small minds or what?

It simply suggests the evil generation Nigeria is producing. The so-called leaders of tomorrow are youth traumatized by what they see around them. A country where well-paid bank workers tip-off robbers and forge checks to draw on dormant accounts; Pastors are ritualists, politicians loot public treasury, police build houses on bribery, army escorts criminals to avoid being searched, custom seize people's goods and sell them on auctions, traders adulterate products even food and medicines, School Principals recruit teenage females students into prostitution rings for politicians' weekend parties/ enjoyment, lecturers rape students for marks, even oga for office rapes her secretary on his office table for her to retain her job... even mama for house taunts her daughters not to bring poor men to her house rather aim at marrying rich men....haba!

Products of Greed, greed, greed and a society that worships wealth rather than God. Nigerians are the undoing of Nigeria! Shame!!

Nefa start. Very soon wives will start betraying their husbands for money; it's just starting with maids. Abi these traumatized girls will one day become wives? Una sorry oo "pikin wey say him mama no go sleep, him too no go sleep"

Nawa o. Thank God for good ending. Obviously, the girl and the kidnappers had the same mindset - easy access to wealth! Nigerian youths should stop seeking the easiest route to wealth. We must emphasize that hard work on the right goals pays off in the long run. You see a bunch of graduates of Engineering becoming pastors, Pharmacists becoming real estate agents, graduates riding keke etc. there's just one thing common in all of them.. they want fast money otherwise why can't a Mechanical Engineer in Nigeria set up a modern auto shop, or even go into parts manufacturing? Why Can't the pharmacist research and go into producing local vitamin supplements? Why can't Nigerian graduates use their education well than buying and selling goods manufactured in China?

Welcome back girl, but please start reading for aptitude test like others and stop trying to use your beauty to get rich. Becoming an Ambassador via Facebook? ...SMH for you.....Sorry sha!

coogar:
the prof must be smoking woollies

this sweeping generalisation gives me goosebumps especially coming from a prof. there are 2 kinds of nigerians in diaspora - those that are documented & the illegal ones.

it is crazy for this professor to put both categories in the same box & then compare to the nigerians in nigeria. how can an undocumented nigerian immigrant in USA/UK do any better when he's not even allowed to work?

obviously, it's not a fair assessment. the professor should be worried that nigerians actually prefer their illegal status in diaspora than going back to their country where they don't have to worry about work restrictions. it then means nigerians would rather serve in heaven than reign in hell.

@Cooger what ist woolllies?

Paper or no paper, legal or not legal, migrating or perching they are still Nigerians, and the writer was saying they are leaving Nigeria and trooping abroad for the hope of immediate gratification rather than sit their black buttts home, and build patiently.

Knowing what you know today, why would a man who owns a gas station in Nigeria sell it to buy a visitor's visa to UK with the intention of staying there illegally if not for misinformation? Na people like that smoke woolies pass o!

MadCow1:
Atleast France is on good terms with God..

Huh! Abeg how? In your tribal language what do you call someone who goes to another person's house and forcefully takes his TV back to his own house and boldly watching the TV while the owner and his children complains around?

Na so this so-called developed countries dey o! Yet there is God o!

KanwuliaJara:
I dey pay taxes o!
No be only me waka come o.
But I was brought up be a MAN. . . A father who cut his coat according to his CLOTH!
So, why I go dey chop credit card like say na my money?

Mys sis, Black Friday na this week o...make I send you my list! It's really small ...just an Apple laptop, ipad mini, some real leather winter jackets, 64" TV....lest I forget please I need a coffee-maker. Do this for a brother

MadCow1:
Nigeria?!

This Man has obviously not lived in France..

What's in France? God just recently saved them from financial collapse, like Greece. Greece dey bleed now. Hope you know that France' wealth is from Africa (Francophone Africa, precisely). Just like the writer wrote, if we love Africa and live like Africans we will be less dependent on foreign countries. Americans are living like Americans. French are living like French. but Nigerians are trying to live like Americans, French, English even Arabians...

KanwuliaJara:
WTF?
So this is AFRICAN CULTURE?
How won't you go broke. . . when all you want to do is COMPETE WITH YOUR NEIGHBOUR?
Yep! Move back if you want. . . I AIN'T!

This dude must be talking about 'TAXI DRIVERS' and "OKPOROKO SELLERS UNION" OF AMERICA!
Please, speak for yourself o!

25 YEARS IN AMERICA. . .I DON'T OWE ONE DAMN CREDIT CARD. . . THAT I CANNOT PAY IN A MONTH!!!
My bills are less than $2000 every month.

MY CHILDREN WILL GO TO PUBLIC SCHOOLS. . . .AND WORK FOR THEIR OWN MONEY!

I am living the life. . . with not a care in the world!

DO NOT SPEAK FOR ME!

You learn to cut your coat according to YOUR CLOTH!

Thanks!

@KanwuliaJara, u don dey brag now! The taxman, IRS dey follow dey read oooo!! . Haba! People know you ooooo! ! I thank God for you oooo, but na only you waka come Amerika?

KanwuliaJara:
Igbo culture?
What is that?
I should have known!
Delusional. . . .ALWAYS!
Mtcheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!!!!

Nothing to do with family section. . . . PLEASE RELOCATE!
Thanks!

Okay @KanwuliaJara, DISCLAIMER: I supported some things u wrote on ur earlier post but I dissociate myself from name-calling and prejudices against a tribe, a group, or a class. Let's keep it professional. By the way I'm not Igbo but Nigeria is our country (Igbo, Hausa, Yoruba, Efik, Ibibio, Itsoko, Tiv, Fulani, etc). I don't have to limit myself to reading posts from one tribe only...then should I walk out of a class taught by an Igbo Lecturer because I'm not Igbo?

Sir,

I've read most of ur works littered everywhere on the internet & on Amazon.com. I started following keenly after u ignited a very lively discussion here on Igbo culture. I have a lot of respect for you and ur works. However, on this ur latest work, I am a bit concerned about the effect of current insecurity and fear on the psyche of people that even negates the so-called fulfillment and success in Nigeria. I have always seen my colleagues in Nigeria 'doing far better' than I'm yet they still want to relocate abroad if given the chance based on the 2 issues i raised, so you didn't actually harp on the issue of quality of life as it affects success/fulfillment

All the same, my respect sir, and more ink to ur pen...I value your contributions to knowledge.