okay, my next posting will be about *Adjustment of status*.

Lets all go back to the motive behind the thread.

All forms ready and will be sent out by the 3rd of January.


If you marry for papers or you marry for love, na una problem. Personally, i no care whether you pay someone for papers or not. it is your wahalah.


Lets all focus on how to make 2018 better for ourselves

TWoods:


You have the absolute right to believe whatever you wish, as long as it burnishes your fraudulent intent. I won’t dignify your false accusations with a further response. Good luck.

Translation:

"Yes, you are right, He married for papers. How that one take concern you"

I have never seen Twoods bow out of a discussion.

Him brother marry for papers

If your family put money above everything else: Trust, love, respect, encouragement, understanding

You don't need them.

I didn't share that story to get pity from everyone.
I was dumb, i made dumb desicion. I trust too easy. Like i always say, i am a gentle person, i no like wahalah.

If you notice i haven't been posting unlike before. I am going through mental stress.

I got so stressed i told my wife i needed space, like she was a "stranger"
I told guy M to Bleep off (well, he deseeved it)
I am gaining my sanity back and leaving all the bullshit in 2017.

Impulse80:


Like say you no be Naija person? That guy does not sell Gala! He just saw what looked like an opportunity to fleece unsuspecting people.
All these online beggars surfaced immediately Blowjobs sent airtime to some Nairalanders. Because the brother intimated that he may send readers something for Christmas, they now think he's Santa-claus.

This thread is about people living in Yankees who want to share the experiences. Let's keep it that way!

I had planned small xmas for my people here.
$500 shared between 10/15 people would have done it.
Right now i am broke. I hsve been "defeated".
My immediate family doesn't have my number anymore. They can't reach me. I deactivated WhatsApp, delete messenger, stop my wife from posting on FB.

It started with me footing one of my dearest family member medical bills sometimes ago.
I was recently tricked into sending $2650.

I have come to accept my loss and I'm moving on.

Right now, i just want to have peace of mind and constant family drama isn't giving me that. My Mrs has suffeeed enough with me being "erratic". I finally opened up to her. I hate to say she was right.
She was right!!. I should focus more on making america home

Yes, i saw the post asking for financial help. Right now, i am in no position to help anyone. I need help myself.

Ediku126:



Please I really need answer to this question?

Yes brother. You will nost likely 95% get a post grad work permit

lionlee216:


I'm so sorry to hear that. Can you share?

Deep family issues bro. Hopefully, i can tell the story when it is all over.

Money, trust, responsibility, lies, betrayal, fraud (in no psrticular order)

error4040:

Gademmit!!! i need a white Girl/Woman in my LIF3!!!!

.

I'll still warn you to be careful of white girls..

Mrs K na like that girl wey you bring from "village" to city.

You know how village girl dey do their first few months in the city.
Exception is that is Mrs K's lifestyle.

The con is that she doesn't know how to keep a secret (just like her sister). . She believes if she tells someone when i am there, its still kind of a secret.

lionlee216:


Lol. See me see trouble ooo.. I never said I want to get you a laptop. I'm asking questions. Oga Mouth Gig will surr get you a laptop as the biggest boss of the thread. How much the cheapest netbook costs?

I am watching this from the sidelines sir.

If i open my mouthtalk wetin my people back home use my eyes see recently, you go pity me pass that guy wey dey sleep infront cannaland.
I just thank God. Money na small thing. The lesson learned is priceless.

sevule:


Oh my goodness!!! I thought I was the only one the bolded happens to! My wife always wants me touch her, kiss her when I am going out, tell her she is beautiful etc. I told her that I wasn't raised that way but since it makes her happy, I try to oblige but sometimes my old habits kick in and I forget. I don't have much experience with African American women but from my experience a lot of oyibo women tend to be touchy touchy and very emotional. But make I no lie the thing dey sweet me sha

I must kiss my wife everytime i see her (doesn't matter if i haven't brushed my teeth). Reply to her "i love you" sentence. Cuddle when we watch movies, talk about our issues (na dis one hard pass. We aint raoswd to comnunicate our problems). Tell her what i want for lunch/dinner. Tell her the gift i wanr for xmas ( Na gift nah, why should i say what i want)
She's sensitive. She says i make her happy everytime and she's never been this happy her entire life. So, I have to be happy too. I had issues recently from home and i broke down. I didn't communicate, and kept it all to kyself cos i don't wanna bother her. She became sad (she doesn't have to tell, her face becomes pale and eyes pink). She can't bare watching me struggle. She aske me over and over. Now, i am learning to connunicate better. We still get into arguments, silly arguments

I think part of it is how we are raised. We don't question things. We do things because that's what we are told to do. We can't question elders. So most of us don't communicate when we have issues. We kept them bottled in trying to deal eith it ourselves.

lionlee216:
Christmas Eve, it snowed alot here.

. This is like few inches. Maybe 3 inches.

Mrs K's village got like several inches. It was almost up to my waist.

Was a beautiful whotr christmas. Ww were stucked playing card games.

Merry xmas and happy holidays...

I went to the "village".. didn't get mobile network but i had wifi.

I however devided to spend the entire time enjoying Mrs K's family company, put away my electronics.

We went to chruch, sang carol and ate some nice food. We play games

And it snowed. They got tons of snow in the "village"

I made a bet with my Mrs and won. "2 bucks if i happen to be the only black guy in sight in the entire "village".

I was.

comradespade:




COYG

Wenger must go!

I wish bro. The boards needs to do something.

But

Lets face the reality. Wenger no dey go.

lionlee216:
[/b]

I can relate to this

My Mrs is very fragile, very emotional. I am not sure how she go survive when we visit Nigeria and she see "poverty" like she has never seen before. She go cry taya dash out all her money.
.
We are raised completely different. I am trying to Nigerian-lize her as much as possible. It isn't working yet tho.

Arsenal draw again today. This club don taya me.
Choi!!!.

I always give my Mrs work to do as long as i say "please and thank you"
"Could you scratch my back please"
"Could you help me move my car"
"Could you do this, can you do the for me please"

Blah blah blah.
It makes her happy (somehow). That feeling i can't do basic things without her makes he feel good.
Few times tho, e no dey work

My Mrs wants me to pet her everyday, rub her hair, rub her feet, kiss her everyday everytime, hold her hands, play with her. I dey try though. I don tell her say den no raise us like that several times but now I'm a change man . I be african we no dey do all those kain mushi-mushi things. I'm changing though.

lionlee216:



Infact my own paperworks have been filled signed and dated right before marriage. After marriage, i only added the marriage certificate and send it off. Some people say 3 months after wedding. I simply said I did a real wedding, so nothing to fear.

Almost 2000$ was spent on my w3dding apart from the wedding rings

Bro, i honestly never plan am like this i for don do am like last year when my madam dey BEG make she do am for me. H1B visa too sure for me ,
I hate paperworks. I hate filling out documents. This greencard thing na too much paperwork.
Thankfully, my Mrs too sure. She fill everything out, i tripplecheck am against instruction signed, check am again
Carefully sort them out in different folders, give my madam make she go mail am.

No comment

We are definitely gonna make edibles by spring/summer

Dremca:
So e no be like naija wey the couple go cook fried rice, jellof rice, rice and sauce, egusi soup, bitterleaf soup, ewedu soup, afang soup, edikaikong soup, salad, chicken plus assorted drinks and after the guests chop all these things finish, him go come put N100 for envelope go give the couple still come collect souvenir on top. For naija, if your no be talk of the town, e means say you broke.

. Who get that kain time for yankee . Everything na outsourcing.
you go outsource your event to an event planner. common spoon, you no go bring to the event. most times people that RSVPed will be charged for their food. So, they will be asked before hand what they would like to eat based on the menu. The event place will plan the food for the number of guests coming. So, if you RSVP and you no show, be sure to get charge

Same thing with Birthday celebration. IF someone here invite you to birthday, no be to come chop and go ooo. hold your money. cos you are paying for yourself.

But for some parties, they will specify what is free. Most BYOB party (bring your own booze), snacks are free. Most african parties, food is free. Most Barbeues/cook out, food is free but they might tell you to bring some part of what you have

giving souvenirs na personal thing. Some people give, majority don't. No time for all that "nonsense" (apologies for the word nonsense but why i go feed the whole community and some people go still complain say dem no chop for my wedding on top that, be in debt. Maka gini? on top wetin?)

lionlee216:


Well I realised marriage will give me access to green card than H1b... After school, i wont be killing myself with employers.

The truth is i married for love. If she is not an American, Yes, i will still marry her. That's the truth! But then i let her know that i hope she will file for me if we get married, she said that is not a problem and she did.. papers is an added advantage... I was messing with a nairalander the other day saying by the time we finish school, You will be looking for H1B whereas I have no need to..

Getting married for papers(Sham marriages) no really worth am but I cant decide for someone what he wants to do..

Bros, why are you so wise!!!... I love you brother (no Homo)
leave people wey wan do arrangi marriage to their wahalah. Everybody to him whalah

*Adjustment of Status update*

Our forms are filled out. All supporting documents and evidences added. We have both our names on almost all bills. Mrs K has my last name now. She did name change on most important documents (social security, bank infos, work info etc)

We have joint health insurance now (i am basically on her insurance)

and Joint car insurance

All these things are added to the documents

We will send them out in January (i am trying to make sure it is exactly two months after marriage. No need rushing it)

All forms look like the picture below (not my image, someone sent it to me as a guide)

lionlee216:


I really dont know how to explain this.. You might get married and decided not to file for you. She might just keep you indoors and servicing her without you working.

Also she might not be working and you work while she controls your money. Imagine a situation of paying bills and catering for 4kids.

Some of those Akatas are very mean but always pretend to be nice. You really dont want a burden on yourself. Worst she give birth and you are stuck for the rest of your life..

Use b1 visa for vacation, spend time in US, MEET people and there you might be fortunate, build a relationship, come back home and everything go dey alright.

My advice might not be pleasing to your hearing but I want the best for you as a fellow nigerian.

Pls reconsider.

Wise word brother. May your days be long

people no know wetin ladies here dey do for Di.ck
she go marry you and no go sort out your papers. you go hang. Front, you no fit go, back you no fit run to.

Bede2u:
I have read the moral advice the Twood guy gives

I am not against him....i know CIA monitors this nairaland. It would be good for them to see that nigeria has principled people.

However the guy is missing some important concepts.
First of all, what is morally wrong can be legal. Its legal for people to marry for whatever reason they want...from reasons like social mobility, family ties, class and religious considerations to issues such as obtaining a greencard or becoming ur dying spouse's heir. I have never met somebody who willingly married someone who wont better his/her life in some way.
Whites marry for green card too. While u.s immigration officers turn a blind eye to that (cos they want America to remain white) they make issues of Africans and Asians who do same. Many Europeans who come to America through marriage, only to divorce later claim their divorce is because of 'irreconcilable differences'. Doing anything LEGAL to exploit the system is allowed and last time I checked, marriage is legal. Check the difference btw tax evasion and tax avoidance. Slavery wasnt moral but it was legal and through it, these whites we are now seeing as custodians of morality sent so many blacks to early, agonizing graves. The atomic bomb at Hiroshima wasnt moral but that didnt matter cos the powers that be (the whites) judged it legal. Innocent people suffered and are still suffering the after effect.

Another important issue he is missing is the fact that visas where introduced by the west to keep Africans and to lesser extent, Asians out of their countries. The rest of the world just copied this without seeing it makes no difference to whites. They find it easy to travel to most countries of the world yet they deny non whites same opportunity. These were the people who exploited (and still exploiting) our natural resources without recourse to morality or legality.
Let me tell u all something...whites dont gv a damn whether u stick to their immigration rules or not...if Africa quota for a given year reach, they stop issueing visas. Funny, Africa never get to reach there quota since most visa applications are denied (including genuine applications). Australia, canada and u.s was made for whites. They only tolerate other races in order to be politically correct. Truth is, the same situation which guarantees u a visa denial in Lagos is over looked for a poor white migrant coming into u.s from czech republic or any other European country. U can be blinded by your self righteousness and not see what the whiteman thinks of the blackman and the Asian man. However ur self righteousness wont change their views. U can only try and beat them at their own game...by exploiting the very idiotic rules they create to keep u out of a country which isnt theirs in the first place. Blacks were the slaves who literally built America...so a whiteman has no moral standing to keep u out with rules which he would gladly bend to accomodate another whiteman

This is a GOOD POINT!!!.... All those oyinbo people dey abuse this immigration well well.
How do you think Trump married Melania?

No be d same adjustment of status wey i dey do now?

Bede2u:
So I met this woman on a social forum. Early 40s, 4 kids lives in southern America. She is African American.
We have become good friends. I live in Gulf region and she is talking of coming to visit me next year. I am late 20s. We are also talking possibility of marriage when she comes. I work in construction in the Gulf while she works as home care nurse in Southern America.

Problem is she has been married 3 times. All to foreigners.

First husband...from caribbean country...had two kids but divorced b4 green card can be given. (He remarried and living in same state with her. Now a citizen)

2nd husband.....a Nigerian who paid her for papers. No strings attached. No love.

3rd husband....another African who she married for love. They married for 4 years. The guy got his papers and left without saying good bye. No kids

Other 2 kids are from a boyfriend...never married.

Now the lady feels that Men Always Leave. I have promised I wont leave if she gives me kids. (I intend to keep that promise) I know she dont believe me though.

Questions
1. If we marry and i come over on spouse visa, can i work on the visa
2. Can i study also on the visa
3. How long can i stay on the visa without applying for green card (incase she gets cunny and refuse to file for me based on her past experience with the African guy)
4. Seeing that she has married 3 times, will it complicate and delay the greencard process if she eventually agrees to file for me

I ask these cos i know she is now paranoid and thinks i would leave after i get papers. I dont mind staying with her after my papers...but i wanna be sure I can live, work and study in America on spouse visa for a long time until she feels confident and trustful enough to file for green card for me. Dont wanna come to America on visa type that wont allow me to work and study

I am begging you bro. Look the other way.

Don't do it. If you look through those forms you have to fill, you will know someone who already married a foreigner and petition for the foreigner is a "red flag" on your application regardless of how genuine your intention is.

Also

Stay away from baby mamas especially with multiple baby daddies, those guys will always be in her life. Mind you, if you're single, decent guy and hard working, they will do everything in their power to hold you down. Some will go as far as getting loan for you, enticing you with money, giving you rides up and down to where you wanna go (if you don't have a car yet) until they hook you.

Stay away from ill tempered ladies. Small argument, they start threatening to stab you

Stay away from the "get out of my house ladies". Doesn't matter if you rent the house together. Simple misunderstanding, the first thing they say is get out. Yankee can be really really tough without accommodation

Stay away from "I will call the police on you" ladies. Doesn't matter what you guys are arguing about. they treating you with police every time. you as an immigrant want the police off your back for whatever reason. it doesn't always end well.

Stay away from ladies that can't keep a job. those type just want a guy they can leech off. you will work and work till the rest of your life. they are the real definition of "baboon dey work, monkey dey chop". mind you, if this is your wife and it is your arrangement for her not to work, well, that is your decision.

Stay away from Women that will marry you just to keep you hostage. These category only want a man in their house so they can boast to friends they got a man. When it comes to filing your papers, their answer is ALWAYS NO, then they result to claiming you just want to use them for papers.

Stay away from lairs, the ones that will injure herself and tell people you did it (especially white women). As a black man, you are always guilty before proven innocent. It is best you stay away from trouble as much as you can.

Stay away from over jealous Women. This type of women are controlling. If you by mistake say hello to another girl, a simple "hello", they accuse you of wanting to sleep with her. this particular category will blackmail you with tears. a lot of them are really abusive.

Generally, you need to find what works for you. doesn't matter the race. Find a partner you know through thick and thin, come rain or shine, He/She has your back. And you also need to play your part. Be a good ambassador, no need to lie to anyone for green card. Be truthful from the onset. Telling a lie means you will need to tell more to cover your track. You also need to stay in your boundaries, you are seeing one girl, sleeping with several others. that will get you in trouble. Be smart, be wise, be humble, be diligent, be respectful. You need to understand your partner will be from a different upbringing and most likely will have a different perspective. so, you both will understand things differently and do things differently.

Oh about the baby mama, Sometimes, a lot of them are victims of bad relationship. you need to also use your discretion. Some of them are really awesome ladies.

And last but not the least, stay the fakk away from impregnating anyone if you know you are not gonna be committed. Better still, say the fakk away from impregnating anyone at all.

rubbiescookies:
pls if you don;t mind answering this my curiosity questions....are their financial obligations made by the men to the parents of the girl.I knw size of wedding depends on couples.same in nigeria.but not same with tradtional obligations as it varies depending on where the girl is from that are compulsory....those that married there can as well chip in their opinions...cc justwise,lionlee216

Oyinbo people, financial obligations made by the men to the parents of the girl

maybe rich oyinbo people will do it, you know, one person sponsor the wedding and everyone comes to eat for free.

No financial obligation bro. I just told her pale say i wan "kidnap" him daughter for life (i told him as a courtesy and as a responsible adult and also cos our naija culture no go allow us marry another man pikin without actually knowing the dad. I really don't have to if i want to go by American ways. We go just marry and tell everyone we are)

My marriage cost less than 500$ (i don't remember but check this thread i think i posted it). The most expensive part is Mrs K's dress.

life is simple bro, let's not complicate it wit all those crazy request by the bride's family (Naija is hard enough. i belive marriage preparations in naija makes things harder on the couples to be).

Next year, we are having a big celebration for everyone. And anyone/everyone that RSVP will be charged for their food (the American way ). So, if you RSVP and you no show up, we go still charge you. shikena


oh, her dad sent us a $70 check (cheque) after the wedding and a really fancy card. Oh i don remember sef, Mrs K suppose give me $35. make i go wake am

I have been missing on my own threads. I haven't checked my mail in a while..


Wah gwan Yutes!! (jamaican)

Wham (Trinidadian)

Bonjou! (St Lucian)

good marning (Barbados)

How far (Naija)

Nig4Greatness:
..
This dude dark sha..Kilode!!!..
Na what you really need God kukuma give you (colour combo),and as dey used to say,unlike pole attracts..Enjoy the bliss man.

hahaha.. it is the knuckles bro. i no dark like that oo. Also, you are directly comparing me with my wife.

you need to see her cousin tho. She be like ghost . She is so white she is blank.

lionlee216:
Thanks ya'll and I appreciate you guys. On behalf of OP, Can you pls enlighten the house the kind of courses to do in US that are hot cakes and can make someone never to run out of Jobs

Bossman
TWoods
Lagosismyhome

etc

Thank you for holding this thread down. I really appreciate your input.

you are the best bro.

EZEIGBO1OFIMO:
see blackness!!!!!!..... oya go and bleach

.

LMAO. The kids will definitely blend

signature2012:


Is it a crime to get married to a USC?You casting the young man as if you are saint.
Your younger brother did same to get his papers ogbeni....

.

"Breeze don blow, Fowl yansh dey public view"

.

God bless America!!!

error4040:


Bj quick question!!!!
how do you discribe snow ? I mean are snow heavy when filled in a Bag just like sand ?


the Question may sound silly, but hell no I had to ask

good question. NExt snow storm, i will post pictures and explain further., I'll mention you

ennyscongy:

Brother, I sent you a pm. Kindly regard it. Thanks

will reply. i have some PM pending