₦airaland Forum

@poster
u sure as hell lack tact.
When it comes to women's physical attributes and the likes, if it's not a compliment; just shut it.
Both 'u re much betta off that way.
Don't go overboard and lie either, trust me they know. It's no use. Rather emphasise her strong points, those things she can't wait to flaunt at every given opportunity. Everywoman has something. . it took even me quite a while to appreciate this fact. We're programmed to reducing women to amalgamations of tits and ass and easily overlook sooo many other things (this is even putting character aside for now); flawless skin, poise, luscious lips, clear eyes, impeccable legs, good make-up sense, neatness, her overall feminity.
God try on those creatures meeen!

1Co 1:19-31

For it is written, "I will destroy the wisdom of the wise, and I will set aside the understanding of the perceiving ones."

Where is the wise? Where is the scribe? Where is the lawyer of this world? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of this world?

For since, in the wisdom of God, the world by wisdom did not know God, it pleased God by the foolishness of preaching to save those who believe.

For the Jews ask for a sign, and the Greeks seek after wisdom;
but we preach Christ crucified, to the Jews a stumbling block, and to the Greeks foolishness.
But to them, the called-out ones, both Jews and Greeks, Christ is the power of God and the wisdom of God.

Because the foolish thing of God is wiser than men, and the weak thing of God is stronger than men.
For you see your calling, brothers, that not many wise men according to the flesh are called, not many mighty, not many noble.

But God has chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God has chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty;
and God has chosen the base things of the world, and things which are despised, and things which are not, in order to bring to nothing things that are;
so that no flesh should glory in His presence.

But of Him you are in Christ Jesus, who of God is made to us wisdom and righteousness and sanctification and redemption;
so that, according as it is written, "He who glories, let him glory in the Lord."

All said and explicitly at that.
Nothing more to add.

tope2000:
Too close and compatible, That has to be the worst break up excuse i have eva in my entire life heard.

Word.
A guy will come up with just about any excuse to get a chick he's done with off his back.
Whether u label it as lame or crippled is pure grammar.

She's really talented n' damn proud of her roots.
Love her to bits for that.

Go, go, go shorty
It's your birthday
We gon' party like it's yo birthday
We gon' sip Bacardi like it's yo birthday. . . . . .


Pretty! Where da party @ girl?
Let's start popping ze wine n' clinking 'em glasses.

Joh 14:6 
Jesus said to him, I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life; no one comes to the Father but by Me.

I don't think there's anything ambiguous here. The Bible is unequivocal in it's stand. Any other interpretation a la human ideologies is only tantamount to what it aptly describes as doctrines of devils.

1Ti 4:1 
Now the Spirit speaketh expressly, that in the latter times some shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits, and doctrines of devils;

welli looks kindda cute.

@BlackMamba
Permit me to say this but u sure don't sound like u presently live in Nigeria. I live in Ibadan, the citadel of political lawlessness so I can identify 1005% with this highlighted case scenario. The most recent one dt I was involved with happened during the wee days of gubernatorial electioneering last year. There was a convoy of PDP morons speeding along Oja Oba axis and one of their tear-rubber jeeps at full speed deliberately abandoned his lane due to traffic congestion, and decided to move against on-coming traffic (my side). Unfortunately for them, my side was no better and at full speed veered right back into the original lane without even looking out for on-coming vehicles on that lane. Long story short, there was this unfortunate commercial danfo driver who was coming stresslessly on that side and simply rammed the pscho-driven PDP jeep. See panic. Firstly all the passengers took to their heels. Not one of them waited to even support the hapless driver. Before u cld say "what the *?" armed police escorts had come down and started brushing the shit out of this guy whose only crime was dt he was outside in his own country trying to earn his daily bread. I couldn't take it. I deliberately left my car in the middle of the road (thereby causing a deliberate blockade of my side) and walked right up to them. My heart was racing like mad but somehow I cldn't stomach it anymore. I challenged the policemen stating dt I saw what happened and the poor driver was not at fault. Their driver was. First question by one of the armed policemen was: "Who are you?" "Wetin be your own?" I don't know where I got the boldness but even though I was shaking, it was not out of fear, I was seething with hate and utter indignation. At that point I realised what it means when you've been pushed to the wall. Wole Soyinka was right. The man dies who keeps silent in the face of tyranny. Funny enough and by divine alchemy they weren't ready to brutalise me. Somehow I believe I sensed some fear in them too. Some uncertainty. A wonderful UI professor who had seen d whole scenario then joined me in making a case for the hapless driver. Some other bystanders too then could speak up concerning the driver's innocence. It was only then (meanwhile, the whole place was at a complete standstill) dt some "dignitaries" came down from other cars in the convoy and also "agreed" dt the driver be let off the hook.

Trust when I relayed the incident to my mom later, she warned, begged, pleaded dt I should never get myself involved in such ever again in my life. This is the mentality dt's killing us in this country.

God bless Nigeria.

Abeg I missed the last episode, whoever watched it shd pls fill me in.

jkpretty:
I needed a blanket to wipe urs

Ooo serious.
Wassup now? been a while. . .
Who's d dude u fashied me for. . . .? he's a goner for realla.

@chamotex
Inasmuch as it's not exactly the best way of meeting a girl, many times it's the only way. The only opportunity and I don't know where u at but here in Ib, forrrrget.

Case scenario:
You're just about entering a supermarket and there's this perfect female specimen sashaying out alone. At dt point u got no choice. If she's a real stunner u can't but step to the play. Mind u, most girls actually do enjoy being stepped to. You can take my word to the bank on this. There're however some serious points u need to take cognisance of to increase  your chances of getting positive feedback from chicks.

Do's

1. Be well dressed.
Look impeccable.(This doesn't necessarily mean formal o!)
Since they don't announce when u'll jam them, make this a ritual. Very few girls can resist a well-clad guy (except of course your woworism negates the entire concept. Blame ya papa. )

2. By all means wear a designer perfume. Trust me it works wonders. This really should be part of (1.)above.

3. Act decisively. Don't hesitate. Act like u know what u're doing and u're in full control.
This catches them wella. Despite all the fronting girls do, they have this thing for assertive guys. I guess it's built into their genes. If there's any stuttering, signs of insecurity what have u, your chances nose-dive.

4. Have a disarming smile. It depicts a genial disposition and allows them to warm up to u easier. Don’t go grinning like a goat (or Mr Bean) either.

5. Be natural. Don't put up an act. Be yourself.
   If she no dig you, she no dig you. Full stop. No Aba-made american accent will score u any correct points with a Behind chick.

6. Your first words matter greatly.
It‘s however circumstance-dependent. My guy by all means say something smart. Dem no dey teach am for school. Dt’s why there’s some soft tissue between your ears. Use it. Ready-made opening lines may be helpful but are by no means dependable especially if not original to you. A drop-dead gorgeous girl has probably heard it a trillion and one times before. Get creative my guy.


Don'ts

1. Never sound desperate. This triggers the flight instinct in them and all they want is just to get away from you. Don’t make it look like u’d get her number at gunpoint if she doesn’t spill it lero (ie jejely ) The issue of personal contact details should be approached in such a way dt it’s just the next logical thing on the lyricing agenda. A chick dt’s had a humorous and intelligent banter with a cool dude is actually most often itching to drop her details. Matter of fact, I adopt a style in which I pretend to have forgotten to ask and just as we’ve said our goodbyes I’m like “Oooh, forgive me, I almost forgot to ask for your number. . . ^{yea rite} . . . is it ok by you? Pleeeez?" (with  raised eyebrows, a wink and a smile) Unless she be winch e go hard to resist.

2. For crying out loud look out for a wedding ring!!! (unless of course u got suicidal tendencies)
   Never step to a married woman. ^{I thot u knew}

3. Never step to a chick who’s with a guy. Haba broosss!!! dt goes without saying. . . Ds world is not your own, u are just passing through. Dt other guy will ensure it’s a rapid exit for you.

4. It pays not to step to a chick who's with her crew.
Now this is subjective. Some high-level bad ass playas may be able to handle this kindda scenario but my guy it's a likely lose-lose situation. My level never reach dia. D girl go just take u shine in front of her girlfriends even if deep inside her she gbaduns you. Na dia way. If anything, look for a way to corner her once she steps out for even a millisecond. There's a way u can make some eye contact that she'll easily grasp and if she's game, she herself will find a way of making the move easier for you by relieving herself of her intrusive clique of friends and the rest is up to you. If she no send you, max she'll whisper to her friends to look at ds ogre who's been ogling her (drooling as well ) for the past 20mins. LMAO. Again, na dia way. As u never formally step to her, your pride's still intact my brother.

5. Never step to a pretty chick who’s obviously in a hurry. Common sense my brother.
She's not d last girl on d planet, anotha one will come biko.
eg. It’s just plain dumb to step to a briskly walking pretty chick in a tight fitting trouser-suit at 7o’clock in the morning. She’s most definitely a bank employee rushing off to work. You definitely will look like a jobless alainikannshe. (forgive me, English no fit convey d message well ).
However if u’re rocking an ochara/tear rubber Honda end-of-discussion (like me ) ^{in my dreams} or anything techqa, ol’ boy offer her a lift fast. If she agrees to hitch a ride witcha, do your thing.

Ol’ boy my fingers don dey ache on top ds my epistle to u. Note one thing however, women are d most unpredictable creatures God ever dared to create. No style is fool-proof. Dse are just guides to more effective chick hunting. Very open to criticisms and similar tips from experienced niggas in da house. (Where’s tkb417 when u need him? )
If I remember any more tips I’ll fill u in.
Do your thang.

jkpretty:
You could almost get a tissue to wipe the sweats on their forehead

U didn't offer me any.

Come to UCH and see for urself.
They all end up here. . . then the basement.

Sabisabi:
Any doctor wey say e never chew any nurse dey lie lie. Doctors dey chew nurse everyday haha.

Why not stick to facts u can substantiate? Overgeneralisation seems to be the bane of nairaland.

@topic
No.

I'll admit there're bad nurses (as far as flirting is concerned) but there also are extremely decent ones whose sterling character and selfless duties are being maligned on this ill-motivated thread. Are nurses any more flirtatious than female bank marketters? air hostesses? female hotel attendants?
A flirt is a flirt regardless of professional persuasions.

If your right eye lips cause you to err; cut the  damn thing off!!
It is better to enter heaven with no lips. . . . . .
Both you and your pastor need to get more worded!

Where I'm from we collect the money quite alright (to reflect our accepting their offer) but return it immediately (without even opening it, to drum it into them that the lady's not for sale) and then immediately literally hand the lady over to her mother-in-law (cs everyone knows she's the koko factor as far as the bride's welfare/well-being in the new home is concerned).
We however collect the yams.
Enuff poundo for the next 7-8wks. . . . . . oooh yum yum yummy

Who are we even giving away next? We seem to have run out of babes in my clan o. . . ^{. . .and yams}

The poster has a sense of humor I strongly admire.
My guy norrin do you joo. Most peeps wey dey yawa u for here no fit put them pix for profile even at gunpoint lailai.
 Na only jkpretty I fit vouch for for hia.

In my honest opinion, I believe building the largest church auditorium on planet Earth ain't got nothing to do with God's glory or Naija's reputation. It's simply a statistic in the Guinness Book of records, the same book that has the record of the most promiscuous woman (she made the record of having sex with over 300 men in 12hrs).
This can only leave people more puzzled about us in Nigeria. How can we be soo religious and soo corrupt at the same time?

For the right amount of cash, the likes of Dele Momodu are ready to bend over and take anything up their .

@Soludo
Thank you sir.

@KSA
Stfu!!!

Without doubt Abiola Ajimobi remains the preferred choice of the Oyo electorate and that was boldly declared in the voting pattern on the 14th of April, 2007 prior to the upturning of the people's wish by the diabolic connivance of the Adedibu-Alakalakala and INEC. He represents the stoic wish of the impoverished people of the long besieged and thoroughly plundered state to be free of the vice-like grip of the PDP/Adedibu cabal. A wish only the state election tribunal is in the position to grant.
All these attacks on the person of Ajimobi are totally uncalled for. Even a baboon would do a better job of handling the affairs of Oyo State than this Akalamagbo of a "governor" so I really don't see Oyo State being worse of under an Ajimobi administration.
Let the people of Oyo State have their way (after having had their say in the electoral process last year) in breaking the yoke/curse PDP/Adedidu have constituted themselves into in the state.

BTW, never knew about the Edo Mafia factor though. Sounds really interesting and definitely convincing. One of the reasons I can't give up Nairaland, ever so educative.

Man and woman are meant to complement each other.
It takes two individually complete people to do this.
An incomplete person coming into a relationship is already an unnecessary drain on it.

@toyinrayo
Bwahahahahahahahahaha!! Dayuum!! Haven't laughed soo hard inna lwaang time.
Those pet's been digging it like there's no 2morrow
U crazee girl. . . Keep it up.

Nothing fantastic about her, I'm sorry to say. Looks exactly like our former househelp without the effizzy make-up artists n' photoshop have effected on her.

tilewill:
Ah, ah does it mean the guy is so unlucky! l think it's
high time he got more closer to God.

Ain't dt exactly what the "boyz" are trying to do? Move him straight into Heavenly Baba's bosom.

Which indoor air pollution pass ds one?

Submit what to what Ethics committee?
Trust me dt list ain't seeing the light of day.

. . . . . . at least not without being properly doctored.