Stevenbright:


Take legal action to get the custody of ur child or you minimize the upkeep u are giving her such that it will be just enough for ur child's school needs and other things for him with little for her personal needs such that she won't get the chance of turning u to her ATM for no reason. You can even get your son clothes, toys and some other things regularly to ensure he is settled.

Thanks boss

Perfecttouchade:
there was a similar situation I knew about. There are certain factors to consider before making ur decision.

There is nothing more to consider, she didn’t consider my son, she happy with whatever she is doing now and I can’t do anything about it.

I’ll be the last man to force or beg a woman to stay with me, man this girl will use me and mess me up if I allow this to continue.

crackhaus:

Some of them (the females here) may not be exactly like his babymama... but I learned early that whenever a man needs advice about women, the last people he should seek opinions from are other women. DON'T even try it!

If she's not his mother or sister (that kind of sister who doubles as a mother by her disposition), then forget it, because he will never get a completely objective and selfless advice from any other female.

I only had to read the opening post and a few subsequent posts of his before making my comment on page 4 telling him to forget this woman TOTALLY and focus on his son ALONE – I could already figure out his babymama just from those comments about her.
When you've had a zillion interactions with women of all kinds and statuses, it becomes that easy.

But of course, 'they' wanted him to try harder, to do more... which is not unusual considering that the default nature of a woman is to place herself in a position of unmerited importance – they want to be desired, they love to feel wanted, they want a man to pet them, even when they are misbehaving and being a complete nuisance... this is how they interpret love, so their first response is "wow this could be me and if it were me (although I won't do this much), I would want my man to try harder... maybe I'm just having bad days and need his support and love to weather it"
Rehabilitation Centre, Lol.

Personally, I don't even know how to try harder when it comes to women and it has worked out well for me thus far... it's been a very long time since I tried harder, probably in my teens.
I guess that's why I had always been attracted to very specific types of women who seem well put-together emotionally & psychologically... but even if some reason I got carried away without noticing anything ab initio, the moment I do, the disconnect is always instant.

I’m done with this woman no jokes.

Am not the type that will beg a woman to stay with me, if my son wasn’t in the picture, am not sure I would have even brought this here.

When a woman says it’s over I immediately allow her bounce, I wanted this to work because of my son.

craleonic:
This looks pretty much like a made up story.

I’m not surprised.

RSVP:
Sorry bro.
I read your story from A-Z and I feel your pain.
You see, we live and learn everyday. No one is the wisest and I don't think there's any foolest anywhere if such word exist.. We sometimes found ourselves in a very critical situation beyond our control which your case is one of those.

I'm sorry your wife is not coming back to you anytime soon until she gets really messed up with that her man or maybe not! Maybe it's going to be a successful ending for her as well... That's not for us to know cuz sometimes shyte happens.
I personally feel her friend was the architect of the situation right now and she knew how your wife got the new man and all that...
Just have it at the back of your mind your wife isn't coming back cuz its too late and your most consign now is your son which I would really love if one of you trusted family member can adopt and help you raise... Forget you don't want your child being raised from a broken home . We all have plans how we want our life to turn out but sometimes we just accept what reality gives us.

Don't call her often as you used to.. Call just once a week...always talk about your son and let me tell you something... She would want to use your son as a bait to frustrate you and act crazy so you just need to act as if you don't care anymore .She might not want to give you your son so you have to be mentally prepared for that too. Don't fight her bro. If you discuss whom to keep the child and she said she will then just box in cuz she would want to extort you to the bone marrow if you put up a fight or maybe just block every means of reaching her if you put up a fight. . All you need is to just reach a compromise how much you bringing to the table for you son at the end of the month. And look, you have to be very smart here. Tell her you will be paying everything for your kids welfare. Like say 200k monthly, and make sure you pay that very maybe 4months and after that start acting broke. Like you are running into serious problem over there (come up with a very serious situation) then you should start sending small change like 50k 70k.. ( in fact always delay payment. You can send 20k 3 times just to Paint a picture you're really broke and things are not working... Bros it's would be very hard cuz your son will deff be affected along the line) Unfixed amount for your kids cuz this woman can run one or two science for your head if you're still vulnerable so you have to paint a picture of a broke and worthless man. She would eventually got tired ( if by any chance she got broke and she isn't getting money like before.. She will turn back to you by then you can then suggest your sister adopt your son) along the line when you can't meet up with the son welfare and by then her eye go don dey clear small when she no get too much money fallen on her lap here and there. .
It's not gonna be easy but you have to be mentally strong man cuz that's the reality of life.
If you're able to get your son and make her out of his life and yourlife as well then that's a win win... He just dey pain me like dis but I wish you all the best bro.

All you said is smart and wise, thanks bro I appreciate. My major problem now is staying a day without calling my son.. I just pray God help me through this.

He is deaf he doesn’t hear anything

Perfecttouchade:
chat me up bro.

Is that your number on your profile ?

area74:
Dear OP,

I have carefully followed your thread and read all the comments by the contributors.

By now, you should appreciate some advices given to you about 2 months ago on the need for you to forget about the woman and move on with your life. Some women here tagged them to be haters, failed relationships etc.

Trust me, Nigerian women are naturally dangerous and complicated to understand. You should thank your God for making the path to separation so easy for you. I am married too and I know the kind of heart break I have suffered in the marriage. You are working your ass off and hardly have a life of your own just because you want your family to be happy and the same woman will describe you like a monster so that people can pity her and encourage her with whatever she is doing. That's why I don't contribute to any matter that any woman brings to NAIRALAND because I know that most of them are lies until you hear from the husband too. I have experienced it before and I know painful it was listening to your own woman describing you to be a terrible person just because she wanted validation. Another important thing to note is that, no matter what you do for your woman and her family, when the chips are down, they will always side with her.

Most times, if a woman is hanging on to you, it's because she is not economically empowered enough to challenge your authority. Average Nigerian women of today want to have an independent mind of their own whether they are married or not. Your woman has gained enough from you and doesn't need you anymore. She has just started a journey of seeing different men. She may even be lucky to meet some who are even more wealthy than you are. There are so many reckless men out there who are ready to spend the cash on women.

I can bet you that she is not in a hurry for any marriage but to enjoy her life, freedom and "easy" money from men.

Just be grateful that she didn't ruin you. Just put your life together and move on. IN ORDER TO HEAL UP, DON'T CALL HER AT LEAST FOR THE NEXT 2 MONTHS. IF YOU CALL HER BECAUSE YOU WANT TO TALK TO YOUR SON, YOU WILL CONTINUE TO FEEL HURT. Focus on your happiness. Imagine yourself to be dead now (God forbid) and think whether your son will not continue with his life. Ensure you send his feeding allowances and school fees. You are also free to have another children wherever you are.

Now you see the reason why you have to become the so called ALPHA Male? Most of the women here will be manipulating you emotionally to try harder because they are not different from your woman including my wife too. I wish she can also walk away peacefully like this.

TO EVERY MAN, NEVER EVER SHOW YOUR WEAKNESS TO ANY WOMAN. MOST TIMES, THEY FEAR AND RESPECT MEN WHO TORMENT THEM.

Women are always unkind to men who genuinely love and cherish them because they will continue to ask for more and make you feel bad till you die. They want to be in charge of your life.

.

Thanks bro, I have decided to gather up my remains and move on. I know one day soon she will realize the mess she made of herself.

My son is my hero and all I gained in the relationship

Perfecttouchade:
well, I keep saying this, only when some ladies will get sense, u don't allow a friend to dictate how to deal with ur relationship, she only forget to understand that if her friend finds herself in such situations, she will never take to ur Babymama's advice..na only God fit epp most relationship/marriages now, communication is dead, tolerance is zero..bro, keep trying to find a way to resolve things and if she's made up, just make sure u do ur part on ur son, I know it's hard to let go due to the boy involved in this..I feel ur pain, whatever it is, it that woman go reason am well, that baby should be considered first before she puts in her decision, all these women, oluwa lo ma GBA won..I know how you feel but try to do all u can to reconcile and hopefully she realizes that she no fit advice that her friend, make she take it..I don't keep friends because once u are family man, there should be limit to some things else , u will be making some behavior just like them.

I asked her if her friend will listen to her if it was the other way found.

I was considering my son and that never crossed her mind.

I tried bro but her mind is made up

Good evening to everyone that followed my post, thanks to everyone that advised me and to those that insulted me I say thank you too.

I learnt a lot from all y’all said, but it’s very unfortunate that she is really bent on quitting whatever we had.

The more I tried the more harder puzzle she became.

I just found out there is someone she is seeing, she told me the guy was an investor who offered to invest in her business, she said the guy wanted them to sign a 15yrs contract and I advised her not to go into that contract because 15yrs is so much.

She reluctantly agreed. When I noticed she wasn’t happy with my advice then I told her to tell the guy to bring his proposal so that I can send it to a business analyst to advice us on the deal.

About 1 month later I asked if she has heard from the guy she said no.

I have confirmed all she is doing with the guy, it’s business and pleasure.

She is bragging to everyone about the business and I know she has not saved enough to invest into the business.

No lies am heart broken, but i know I tried.

Please how do I delete this thread?

Hmm

The robot in Aso Rock has once again condemned.

Let’s expect trash from Liar Mohammed later today

Almighty Nigeria bullets

Very quick to congratulate, felicitate and mourn with other countries.

He goes mute when the above affects his country

Klass99:


Your dad invited her when she reached your home town or while she was still in Lagos? Pls clarify

Is this uncle one of the mother's brothers? Have you ever engaged with him in your attempt to win her over and maintain your relationship?

How old is she? You don't need to give me an exact age, the age group or range she falls into will do just fine.

When she wants or needs something from you, how does she communicate that, with the way things are now?

Apologies for the 21 questions, I'm curious about the things I asked. Face front and keep doing what you are doing, at this point you have done all you can. It's time to mentally/emotionally move on from her.

My dad invited her from Lagos, she was supposed to travel by flight oo... Her maternal uncle, she is between 29/31 of age... she stopped asking me for anything.

I have moved on and I’m living the best of my life.

Ishilove:

What happened?

My dad invited her, her uncle said she shouldn’t honor the invitation.

I have been avoiding her, I only call her to speak to my son

Klass99:
Broken2020,

I'm on these streets today and I thought to inquire about you and your chic.

How far? Did they still make the trip to see your father or not? What did your dad say to you afterwards? I mean after the trip/after seeing her.

I have a feeling she may have changed her mind at the last minute and told you she's not going, to avoid more counsel but, correct me if I am wrong.

The whole thing has turned terribly bad

Once a lifetime dude

Yes

helinues:


Same Abaribe that stood for fugitive Kanu as a surety?

The case will be reviewed in few days by the dictator because he dared to question how they got the number of votes from Boko haram infested area.

As for you, learn to see and say things the way they are, a tooth won’t fall off your mouth if you speak the truth

Was this piece put together to discredit the Amontekun ? I don’t understand because this makes no sense to me

Everything this government criticized is what they do best

Run

The one on the left looks like

Always dismissing shameless cowards. Dismiss civilians claim, dismiss Boko Haram claim and international community claim

majamajic:


East African women are very neat , apart from Ethiopia or Eritrea women (bath once a week mostly )

Tanzania , Rwanda, Kenya and Uganda are very neat down there , 95% of them do squirt during sex
(95% of west African women especially Nigeria finds it difficult to squirt during sex )

I have stayed in Kenya and Tanzania, these guys are so dirty. Uganda yes they are neat but they all can sleep for Africa

Used iPhone 6

DKM123:
Even the ones who are poor, lazy and unknown are here SHAMING a 23year old orphan who has against all odds USED HER BEAUTY AND BRAIN to face the world headlong and has come out even more beautiful, popular, rich and loved by many.

What other brain do you need to successfully navigate this world unlike your own brain that has made a failure on nairaland pursuing "likes".

NA UNA NO GET BRAIN, MY BROTHERS.

Don’t cry more than the bereaved bro, women with brains don’t promote nudity

osuofia2:

EXCEPT FOR ISLAMIC NATIONS

We have dem in Nigeria na.

Kondomatic:
And the brain?

Useless is the brain

It’s one million times easier to die in Nigeria than anywhere else in the world