₦airaland Forum

Ayodejioak:
Femi Oyedola is rich enough to buy 25% of iPhone's stock. Fact that he doesn't flaunt one at social gatherings might be due to cyber security and social privacy reason!
Poster - oya, receive sense!

udemejack:
to all you up there saying trash...the following might be the reason behind his emotional breakdown;
1.maybe he feels lucky to have finally nab that his best best half.
2.maybe his parents are dead and he his wishing that they were around to have witnessed this great day.
3.He cant wait to step out of the cage of bachelorhood.
4.He feels lucky to have someone like her.

CaptainJeffry:
Trash.
Take some sand in your papa compound and mould the husband you want, you slowpoke.

Anything for troll these days.

LagosCiti:
Because they know Christians will always keep the door open regardless of religion. Pentecostals will not persecute Catholics, Evangelicals won't start killing Anglicans because they know who they're serving. Love always wins. Christ is love.

pedrilo:
this kind of ladies r not d type u do dat wit mehn, these type dnt hav to tell u to respect urself b4 u do. babe pass babe bros
how can u even bring up sex wen a girl is yet to giv her consent to be in a relationship wit u?
im sure she's nt a gutter girl, im sure.

sparko1:
Are you kidding me? Your type is the reason ladies act like deme-god! Seriously, I remember a lady asked if she slap me, will I slap her back? I was like before your hand hit your lap, you will be so shocked that!

My brother, if you allow any girl to walk on you because of what both of you will enjoy, how intelligent are you! Imagine a lady that is younger that our last born talking about slapping me, that is why I don't blame some men when they hit their woman!

Lomprico2:
Hmmm!

Many people have been fasting and praying for years for just 3 square meals a day and none of their friends have dashed them 1k b4. Some for jobs and no one has told them to come n sweep their compound.

A criminal claims he fasted and prayed for 3months so that he will get enough money to win political post and loot and oppress and cause more poverty, hunger and job loss and God answered him instantly!

mercy0008:
So I'm serving in this organization and ended up being friends with this guy, we seem to always have something to talk about as we both read books and share an interest in politics. We will go see movies, go watch football and sometimes go bowling too.
After a short time we discovered we sort of started growing feelings for each other, I have not been dating for a year but he is in a relationship.
Now we are both feeling bad because his girlfriend is really a nice girl, at least based on stuffs that i 've heard about her from him, but he claims he cant understand why he is this attracted to me too, said all he knows is he can just be himself around me without any fear or worries about what i think of him.
We are trying our best to keep away from each other but really this is over powering and its not working. Somehow he just finds himself at my place after work(i leave the office before him) till maybe 11pm most times even if his girlfriend is visiting.
Just thought to share with you all, please is there something else i can do.
I honestly don't want to come between him and his girlfriend but my feelings for him hasn't changed.
WHAT DO YOU THINK I SHOULD I DO?

oluwaseyi000:
Good morning

Pls anyone with a good advice or link to where I can do my NYSC service in Lagos.
I'm a software developer and well skilled in:
1. Php
a) laravel
b) code igniter
c) vanilla php

2) SQL
a) mysql
b) meedoo

3) HTML

4) CSS
a) bootstrap

5) JavaScript
a) jQuery
b) ajax
c) plain JavaScript

6) WordPress

I already have some experience and I'm also currently learning mobile programming using angular and ionic

My contacts are:
08151000728
08146096565

Email: adebajooluwaseyi@gmail
com

Thanks.


you can also contact me for to handle your software and web projects

Kobicove:
This article does not state their grievances, it only states that they are demanding an apology...for what exactly?

alBHAGDADI:
Nonsense talk from a false prophet looking for ways to justify his obvious wrong doings.

The disciples of our Lord Jesus Christ were not bodyguards. Anyone making such statement is only insulting Jesus cos he never hired any bodyguard.

Why would anyone need a bodyguard? Is it not to protect you from getting hurt or KILLED?

If apostle Suleiman says Jesus had armed bodyguards, then what he's saying in essence is that Jesus didn't know what he came to do on earth.

davodyguy:
Is he a god? Even Pope doesn't have body guards. So who's he?

orisa37:
I believe him because he sees God often and he is always delivering Messages directly from God.

anuoluwapo884:
Too many drama in Nigeria from #Fulani Militias# to #BH# to #SARS# only in Nigeria

Adeoba10:
I am sorry for asking this useless question, my first question is During the change of name in the car document, will they change the name to God's name or the pastors name.
Number 2, if i should sow a car as a seed, can i harvest dangote trailer?

LadyGoddiva:
I cannot even believe the comments I’m reading here. Like are you fuckiñg shitting me?? Even from fellow ladies too?
Things is, Nigerians are too close minded and backward thinking. A lot of things can constitute as rape. It’s not only when a random guy abducts you and forcefully has sex with you while you scream and fight back can be considered as rape. The basic thing that defines rape is CONSENT! Whether she was wearing only her panties in the man’s bed, even if she was twerking naked for him, as long as she said NO, then he had no right to try and perform any sexual activities on her.
And since when did agreeing to cuddle him automatically imply consent to have sex with him? He even went on to give her orals and strip her. Thing is, even if she may not have fought back, bottom line is, she didn’t want sex to happen. And he went on and did what he wanted anyway. That’s a more subtle kind of rape.
Nigerians really need reonrientation of their mindset when it comes to the issue of rape. I’m seeing a lot of bs comments like “why would she go to a guy’s house when it’s not her boyfriend” and “why would she wear only shorts in his bed and why would she sleep on the Same bed with him?” The thing is, irrespective of the circumstance surrounding the story, she didn’t give her consent and the man had sex with her against her wish. It wasn’t consensual sex thus, it can be classified as rape. Too bad she’s just speaking up now.

betafuture:
I am very sorry, it seems like anytime I post on Nairaland is actually the time I have great challenges in my life, however, my posts also reflect the chronicle of my life. You may wish to check out my last posting about how I was sacked in the Bank with a debt that was guaranteed by a junior staff, whose job was threatened by the loan I obtained and she guaranteed for me. please find the link https://www.nairaland.com/2282140/loan-incured-before-termination-appointment Like I mentioned in that post, I got a job as with a Rep member and he appointed me as the Special assistant on a salary of 80k monthly and my boss paid my rent, of which I engage with my lender to take 50k with me monthly and right off the excess interest and stop disturbing the junior colleague, an arrangement they agreed to and everybody was fine, save that I had to struggle to cope with 30k monthly as a family man, working in Abuja. My wife never complained. I just gave her 25k from the salary, once received, to buy food for the family why I tried to manage with the remaining 5k. It was tough! Luckily, a junior lady cousin who works in a bank was posted to Abuja and we had to accommodate her. She was very kind and understood my plight. Sometimes, she drops up to 50k for my wife to augment the house expenses. She would tell me and sometimes, I would take additional 10k to ad to my pocket money.

The home was running, my son, my wife and my cousin, including myself were very happy. As a banker, I had learned the skill of marketing and networking and negotiation. In the course of my sojourn in the national assembly I met a head of a parastatal wjo needed me to do some strategic alliance between his organization and my boss. We later became great friends, and i realized I could access a scholarship to study in the UK through him. To cut the story short, I pursued this opportunity to the latter and I got a Federal government scholarship to pursue a Masters degree in the UK. I saw this as an opportunity to rewrite the story of my life. Two months in the UK, I began to look for means to bring my wife and son to join me in the UK. While I was in UK, I made it a point of duty to send 150k to my wife in Nigeria on monthly basis (Remember I was on scholarship) and I also do student work in the UK. Because we did not sell our car during the crisis, I also gave the custody of the car to her.

FIRST SUSPICION

When she was about coming to the UK with my 7 years old son, we decided to give out some of our home appliances and sell most of them including the car. Since I was not in Nigeria, she was to manage the transactions. Because I opened her e-mail address, i do see her mails, so i could see the alert on her GTB. The first thing that prompted me was that the amount she received for the sales of our car was 100k higher than what she declared to me. (The fund was meant to buy the flight tickets for her and my son). There were other expense transactions that were over declared, but the actual amount debited to her account were quite low. I did not confront her on these issues until she arrived UK with my son. When I did, I could see the way she manipulatively and professionally lied her way out of the whole issue. I did not pick an offense, hence i made her to understand that I was never convinced. Since then my instinct told me that if she could lie to me so much on finance, maybe there are other things going on in her life that I never known. However, I opened her Facebook account for her years ago in Nigeria, but I never bothered to check it. Out of curiosity, I tried login into her Facebook account and I discovered she has changed the password. My first reaction was to check it, but had I done that, she would have been conscious, then I used my skill as an trained IT security expert to crack her password and then access her Facebook. I ran through all her messenger message and everything was fine. Apart from a certain guy who always beg her for assistance and prayer, there was nothing really suspicious about her messanger and then, we continued with our normal life.

After a week in UK, she started to work as a carer (her visa permitted her to work fully), and she began to make money. I know how much enters her account and we decide how to spend. My son also start schooling and life began to have meaning again. I finished my masters with a distinction and the best graduating student in my department and my University offered me automatic admission for PhD, with part scholarship.l To remain, we needed to source funds to show evidence that my family can stay with me in the UK and show evidence of the balance of school fees. We sourced for money everywhere. She brought all she had and we had to borrow both from UK and Nigeria. My boss was very supportive and I commenced the PhD this September. As a family, we have a problem. My son is now 8 years and we have been trying to make another baby but it does not seem to be forthcoming. We have been to hospitals in the UK, we were both tested and once told my sperm motility was low, treated, but later we were considered both ok.

Since her arrival in the UK, I noticed that my wife suddenly repel sexxx. Sometimes, we had sexxxx just once in a month, she would find a way of brushing away by advances. At a level, i had to ask if there was any problem, but she said it was because of the new environment, her jobs and what have you. This further told me that all was not well in my marriage. She knows I love her and I would do anything for her. While we were yet trying to pay my tuition, her mum got a US visa and all the children were making contributions for her journey, I had to take from my school fees and send to Nigeria and manage my school to give us more time. I tried to ensure that we continually live like one happy family.

Do not let me sound like one perfect good guy. I had also lived a rough bad life in the past and she is aware. During my days in the bank, I had been sexually reckless and irresponsible. There was a time I left office to a gal house, fckked her and I never knew that the condom we used was stick to my shoe. I drove with it home, entered home very late at night, my wife was already angrily waiting for me in the house, only to see a used condom with sperm inside attached to the soul of my shoe. It was an issue that we had to battle with for weeks, even though I never confess it was from, I told a story that it must have got gummed to me at the mechanic village where I had gone to pick my car in the evening (She was aware that someone has accused my mechanic of having sexxx in his car, leaving condom at the back seat). after few weeks, we resolved the issue and we continued leaving normal life. However, there was also a time I suspected her activities on Facebook and I realised a guy whom she has known in the past has been pestering her and she seems to be encouraging him (That was during our period of financial crisis). I had confronted her, she had denied they never had anything but the guy was just pestering her. I apologised and went sober. I called the guy (who was also married) and lived in another faraway city. The guy denied having anything to do with her that she just knew her while growing up. The guy originally blasted me, but later called back and apologized and promised never to disturb her again. I was hurting for months, after which I forgave, forgot and moved on. Let me also state that during the period of my financial crisis, I made a covenant with God, after listening to a message, that whatever the case maybe, I will remain faithful to my wife. This I have manage to keep despite advances from both married and single friends and acquaintances.

THE REAL ISSUE

Now, we are living in the UK and very happy, she is working full-time, while I pursue my PhD full-time, work part-time and my son schools full-time and we were all happy, save the issue of delayed pregnancy and (to me, the poor sex life from her). Let me also state that I bought her a Samsung phone (when she arrived last year), which I have full access to because I know her password. Few months ago, she told me she wanted a bigger phone that she would send the one I bought her to my younger brother in Nigeria who had been disturbing her for a phone. Even though, I thought we did not need to spend money on a new phone at that crucial time because of the looming school expenses, I consented just for her to be happy and she got herself a Samsung galaxy s8 plus for 700pounds, which she would repay of 2 years. The first thing that prompted me about the phone was that she changed her password, but I never mind because I thought she was preventing my son, who always loved to play game on her phone from accessing the phone. However, after few weeks, I began to feel very uncomfortable about the whole stuff. My instinct just told me all was not well. Whatever was it, I could not place my finger on it. But after reviewing my work with my supervisor in the University yesterday, I just felt like going home to rest, instead of studying in the school and then, I met wife in the house with my son. She was trying to order some items online for my son for Christmas and on arrival, she gave her phone to select what we should buy for him, and then, the FB message came into her phone and I could read...'it is not what you think, I have been very busy'

I selected the item I thought was ok, gave returned her phone, picked my laptop and logged in to her Facebook. My wife pretended she was enganging me in discussion, but was responding to the message from a guy, who obviously was her lover and she wrote (I was reading from my computer without her knowledge) 'You know I will ALWAYS LOVE YOU'. and the other guy responded 'I love you more baby' (By this time, I was already burning on the seat, but I somehow managed to keep my calm). She wrote 'But you don't call me' ...and she stood up and went to the kitchen (I wanted to gather enough evidence before I reacted), but immediately she got to the kitchen, she deleted the conversation. At this time, I could not take it. My son was in the sitting room, watching cartoon. I went to her in the kitchen and aggressively confronted her. She originally pretended she did not know what I was saying, but when she say the aggression and seriousness in me she started begging and crying. I lost control of my emotion. I was angry and shouting. My son was there. He was too young, but very intelligent. he understood everything and began to blame his mum, at the same time asking me ti give mum a second chance. I was bitterly hurting. I felt like tearing her into pieces, but if I tried that in UK, it will be straight to jail. She could not state the reason behind her action. She was still trying to lie. She said the guy was her ex and they recently became friends on Facebook and the guy is trying to rekindle the old relationship. The guy is based in Nigeria, they do not even see. Everything she said was incoherently sense. All she wanted was that I should forgive her. I should not tell anybody. She cried, wept and what have you. I was hurting. If it were to by Nigeria, she would have left my house yesetrday, but in UK, it is difficult. The love turned to hatred. She managed to convince me to enter room with her, so that she will discuss the issue with me, without getting our son involved. In the room, it was the same crying and plea for forgiveness and a promise it would never happen again. I told her i was ok, but she would not let me out. I had to angrily shove her away from the door and she hit her head against the wardrobe. i was too angry, too sad, and too hateful to care. i called her all manners of unprintable names. I cursed her, I was just too angry. She kept begging. I left for the sitting room and she came back, knelt down before me and kept begging. My son was crying that two of us were making him sad. The young boy even threatened to tell his teacher in the school on monday. I was too angry to listen. I just told her to let me be. She stood up with tears in her eyes to enter the toilet, I checked her Facebook account again and realised that the lover had sent another message thus: "My dear I don't call you always to protect your home, but I always check your pictures every night before I go to bed" As I was reading, she stupidly deleted that again in the toilet. (Please note that my wife always post our family pictures on facebook, stating how I am the best husband in the world).

My anger erupted again and I rushed to meet her in the bathroom and asked her why she deleted the last message of the guy and she tearfully answered that she did not want me to see anything that could aggravate my anger the more. I angrily snatched the phone from her and smashed it on the floor. She knelt down at my feet and continued to cry and beg for forgiveness, but I was hurting so badly. I left for sitting room again and my son was confusedly crying. She came back and knelt before me and continued begging and weeping and begged we should go back to the room to discuss, at least to protect our son. After a while, i followed her. There was nothing to say; the same weeping, crying and promises to not do it again and swearing that they never had anything together. I told her I needed to talk to the guy and she pleaded I should not. I told her she is giving me an impression that she is protecting the guy so that she could continue her illicit affairs with him and told her it would not work. The can change tactics, but its is only a matter of time. I told her, I would forgive her, but I cannot trust her again and when there is no trust in marriage, the marriage is gone. I also told her I must engage that guy that she should give me his number, but she said her phone is no longer working. I made her feel comfortable that I have forgiven her, but honestly I am hurting. I went back to my laptop, continued chat with the guy on her messenger, but he was now online. We both slept on the same bed, i realised she could not sleep. In the middle of the night she woke me up to beg again, she was offering a make-up sexxx, but I was not interested. I told her i had forgiven her, but I am still hurting and there is no way i could have erection with her. In the morning, I checked her messanger, i discovered the iddiot has responded, still claiming to love her. I checked his profile, I realised he is a muslim, who has a wife with two kids. His location was not shown, but most of his pics her in Nigeria apart from two which have foreign background. I also realize he has limited posts on FB, but the phone number on his FB page is US phone number.

From my wife's FB account, I sent a message thus:

Hi, Mr Farouq, my name is Adams, I am Grace husband
I just wish to inform you that all the rubbish you have been doing with my wife are now exposed to me
I advise you in the name of whatever thing you believe, STAY AWAY FROM MY WIFE.

I also realize you are a married man. If you have any moral integrity and respect for family values, you will know that
responsible men do not run after married women or break homes.

I do not care whatever you claim you think of her, just heed this warning STAY AWAY FROM MY WIFE.

He read it an never respond. I went to her facebook setting and unfriended him.

I left home in the morning to go study in the library, but honestly, I could not assimilate anything. I am so emotionally broken down, so psychologically disturbed. The whole event kept playing in my head. I found it difficult to rationalise it. I continued to find fault in my being and my personality. I know I am very attractive handsome young man. Despite showing I am married, ladies still flock around me. I am also a passionate lovemaker. I dress well and look neat. I don't seem to understand where I have failed. Sometimes I just close my eyes and i feel tears dripping, but I have got to be strong. As for her, she has remained in the room since morning, hiding her head in shame and crying profusely. I have cut off communication with her since I came back from school and I have enganged myself in drinking spirit maybe my spirit will be strenghtened.

This is my story, this is my ordeal. Please I need advice.

Thanks.

NairalandCS:
I see people put their name at the end of an article on sites so you know who wrote them, it still doesn't mean the site in which you read the article from don't pay them. It's just the way it is.

Acknowledge your handwork o jare.

Abi it's now a taboo for someone to say the truth ?

Corrinthians:
Osus will still wail over these innocuous pictures.

Late Nnamdi Cownu's miscreants are a very sad bunch.

raker300:
Buhari, after all the money you threw around in Anambra State, you still lost..


Obiano, the people’s governor..

Ijaya123:
So no be only Computer Village guys sabi this scam...

midolian:
A big sign this incoming president will be worse than Mugabe. I see Zimbabweans biting their fingers over this choice in few years time.