₦airaland Forum

***goes to kiss girlfriend and halts***
Honey did you brush your teeth very well today? Cos it seems. . . "there's dis smell thats hard to miss".
Anyway my point is, tell your partner no matter what he/she feels about it, cos they will definitely thank you later.

michelin89:
I sorta live alone. You know say African dishes are always cooked in large quantity. Na who I dey cook for be the problem.

So nobody saw dis ^^^ lie abi na only me dey see for hia.
Dis ur tory get K leg.
We no say na only indomie u sabi cook, why u com dey show urself na?

jenibayo:
Wetin be your own sef

Just hate s*hit threads.lol

Location and price.

^^^I be like say you don dey do watchman for dis thread. Every comment dey get reply from you.
The comments are not in-line with the topic.
U shud rename the topic to Jenibayo.

@Topic,
Break ke? Na primary school?
Its either you're in or you're out.
If a girl i'm dating decides to take a break instead of sorting things out with me, dat break go tire am ooo.
I'm not trying to be harsh or something, but whats the point?
When will it last? A week? A month or 3 months?

topeodus21:
Hello house,
Am in love with my fiancee,and we av decided to spend the rest of our lives together,
she is planning to further her studies by getting a university degree after a diploma,
which will take another 4years,i love her dearly but ow long can i wait cos am really in
support of her getting a good degree,
pls i need your honest advise cos am new in d house

Bros, you wan dash another person ur financee. The thing go happen korokoro for ya eyes. You go train am finish, another fine broda go come collect.
No try am unless you have some kind of insurance, like getting her pregnant. Pregnancy is the best way to hold the woman 4 ground. With pregnancy, no leave no transfer.
It sounds funny but you have to know that there a lot of handsome decieving,caring and romantic guys in school.
One word from them and ur dream wife falls like a pack of cards.
I've seen married women who went to higher institution and changed.
The best is to get married first,score the goal if possible,(lol) before anything.
Dis one no be opinion, na solid advise.

vivaladiva:
i swear there was a hotel, called the seaside resort
and there was not a pond or lake in sight

Lmao

Ujujoan:
You are in-love and confused about someone who's 7 months older than you? How old are you sef, 12?

Reply a post with a polite comment for once.
Dem swear for you?
.

@Poster,
7months is not much.
Love is all that really matters.

jenibayo:
I got alot of things doing but i cant just stay a day without nland.
I love nland so much becos its always makes me happy

Lets be sincere,you got a lot of things doing. things like what? Going to toilet?

[b]Only reason I dissed you in the first place is because you denied seeing me Now I ’m pissed off Sit back and relax homey, kick back and relax, grab a six pack while I kick facts Yeah Dre ’s sick track, perfect way to get back Wanna hear something wick wack? I got the exact same tat that ’s on Nick’s back I’m obsessed now Oh gee, is that supposed to be me in the video with the goatee Wow Mariah, I didn ’t expect her to go balls out naughty woman, shut the bleep up before I put all them phone calls out you made to my house when you was wild n out before Nick When you was on my manliness and give you somethin to smile about How many times you fly to my house? Still trying to count Better shut your lying mouth if you don ’t want Nick finding out You probably think cuz it’s been so long if i had something on you I woulda did it by now On the contrary, Mary Poppins, I’m mixing our studio session down and sending it to mastering to make it loud Enough dirt on you to murder you This is what the bleep I do Mariah, it ever occur to you that I still have pictures? However you prefer to do and goes for you too, Nick, gay You think I ’m scared of you? You gonna ruin my career you better get one Like I ’ma sit and fight with you over some slut naughty woman womanliness who made me put up with her psycho backside over 6 months and only spread her legs to let me hit once Yeah, what you gonna say? I ’m lucky? Tell the public that I was so ugly that you bleeping had to be drunk to bleep me? Second base? What the bleep you tell Nick, punk? In the second week we was dry humping. It’s gotta count for something. Listen, girly. Surely you don’t want me to talk about how I nutted early cos ejaculated early and bus all over your belly, and you almost started hurling and said I was gross, go get a towel you ’re stomachs curling. Or maybe you do. But if I ’m embarrassing me, I’m embarrassing you and don’t you dare say it isn’t true. As long as the song’s getting airplay I’m dissing you. I’m a hair away from getting carried away and getting sued. I was gonna stop at 16. This is 32. This is 34 bars. We ain ’t even a third of the way through. Damn, Slim. Mariah played you. Mariah who? Oh did I say ”LovePeddler”, Nick? I meant a liar too. Like I ’ve been goin off on you all this time for no reason. Girl you out ya alcholic mind. Check ya wine cellar. Look at all the amounts of wine. Like I sit around and think about you all the time. I just think this is funny when I pounce you on a rhyme. But it now i ’m about to draw the line. And for you to cross it that’s a mountain that I doubt you wanna climb. I can describe areas of your house that you wouldn ’t find on an episode of Cribs A blubba load ribs if I hear another word so don ’t go opening your jibs cos every time you do it’s just another load of fibs I ain ’t saying this poo again, ho. You know what it is. It ’s a warning shot for before I blow up ya whole spot Call my bluff and I’ll release every bleeping thing I got Including the voicemails right before you flipped your top When me and Luis were tryin ’ to stick two CD’s in the same spot (Slim Shady I love you) I love you too Let me whisper sweet nothings into your ear, boo. Now what you say? (It ’s nothing) Guess what I’ll do? I’ll refresh your memory when you said ”I want you” Now should I keep going or should we call truce? (You think you ’re cute, right? Hahaha) You bet your sweet backside I do (I ’m Mary Poppins, b) And I’m Superman, mmm (Mary P. Slim Shady) Comin ’ at you So if you’ll still be my (babygirl) Then I’ll still be your (Superhero, Wilma M.) Yeah, I ’m right here (You like this) Nope. Not anymore, Dear. It cuts like a (knife) when I tell ya get a (life) But I ’m movin on with mine Nick, is that your (wife) Well tell her to shut her mouth then I’ll leave her alone If she don ’t (sing this script?) then I’ma just keep goin (I see Mary Ann. Mary Ann’s saying ”cut the tape, cut the tape”. Knife!)[/b]
O boy! Eminem f*uck am up!

@Elrazur,
Apology accepted. I don cool temper. Na because of you oo. Dat girl make me vex no be small.
Dadudek, show don finish. I don draw curtain.
Tasha,
Whats up? How things?
Your bf nko?

bayor48:
She dump me becos i could not meet up with her financial needs despite what i did 4 her and her sibblings.

Eww! So sad!
Why u com poor na?
***gives him 24 lashes 4 being poor***
Sorry! No cry! E go better

ElRazur:
Cantell and Plats

Why nauw? Wetin una dey fight over. No make me post my picture jare.  

No mind dat mumu gal wey no get nyansh. She com dey look for pple chest. She no even fit show her retarded face.
Look at dat lepacious leg wey dey her profile. Imagine how the face go com be.
Bros, no post ur pic. She go carry ur pic dey 4orm 4 her oloshi friends.

platinumnk:
Again I say Back to sender, may it touch your kindred, and may it NEVER leave your generation!

Nne gi Nwukwaa!!!!!!!!!!!! Ibu ezigbo onye ara!!! Ahula m gi na nro na iga anwu na 15th december onwa ekeresimesi elie gi na 25th december. elichagi mugu a ina eri ona atogiuto ga abuzi mugu muna nidi otum. obu na imagi na obumunwa tubara nne gi ime oji muo gi? isi na obu asi gi gwam ka m gwagi ka aji otu na ire ya di.

Small pikin. You no get yarn sef.  See as u dey jump up & down like dead bodi wey dem no bury well.
Anyway i no remember say na walking corpse u be.
All d aboki wey you give free nyansh because of suya, dey ask of u.
I don tell dem say make dem no near, na tyme bomb you be.
Any guy wey near you, get death wish.
I hear say u dey cry 4 night. sorry, there's no hope. Na to drag your sorry a*ss back to Nigeria, make oyibo ppl no cremate u 4 dear.
Otu ocha. Ozu nwuru anwu.

platinumnk:
nwanem
I say back to sender! and may it follow you from generation to generation!
Look at this isi ewu trying to open his dirty mouth
I wu onye ara nnegi wu akwuna nnagi wu onye ohi!
ikwikwi ka ibu

You dey fear fear? You don die finish.
If sickle cell no kill u, HIV wey you carry comot for naija go sound you.
I sabi you well well for dat tyme wey you dey f*uck to chop free suya for allen . U tink say i no go remember. Ya name na nneka. I go scatter your runs for hia.
Dey there! U no fit show ppl your face. Na to show ya scrappy legs and infested b*reasts.
U no go pass that 21st buffday. Na me talk am.
Now na cough you dey cough.
Small time s*hit go dey comot for ya mouth.
Akwuna 1 naira. Ndi alaye na-acho gi na lagos. Ozu otele.

^^^ its a normal feeling when you like someone. It happens. If roles were reversed, dat guy go dey fight everyday because of you.

hackney:
I'll like to drop-kick ya'ardua into a saudi refuse dump.
selfish dirtbag!

I'll like to rip mel Gibson's ears out and punch him in the mouth.
Self-praising twit.

I'll like to kick kelly osbourne's head in.
such a dog!

I'll like to give kanye west a serious left hook.
what an idiot.

I'll like to smack jordan (katie price) one ,
what a man-eating slut.

I'll like to bang  scot's (kourtney kardashian's fiance) head against a wall.
greasy Arrow.

Then i'll give bruce Jenner a surprise whack! in the mouth
what's he on about?

I'll like to give paris hilton a loud knock on her empty head
what a  waste of space.

I'll like to give kelly rowland a hot back-hander for being so up
bey's sexy behind.

i'll like to kick rick ross in the belly.
rolly-polly stink bomb.

I'll like to keep slapping John mayer (jenny's ex)  continously till he cant feel his greasy face.
what a douche bag.

i'll like to push lindsay lohan to the hard pavement.
slag!!

I'll like to run into tiger woods with a clothes line.
what a scumbag.

Phew!!!!! that helped.
cheers

O boy! Laugh wan kill me.
My ribs dey pain me like pepper.
Especially wit d continous slapping of john mayer.

Tashaluv:
@cantell, wat if i raise ma level nd he decides 2 let mi be?as in, wat if he doesnt beg me?, den i lose him, jest lyk dat?!its hard.

See tasha, we guys take everything for granted, maybe not all.
I once dated a very short girl. Sorry to say this, but i only wanted a fling with her, but i ended up dating her.
Why? Seeing myself as handsome guy, very tall and a bit muscular, i thought i'd just fling wit her and move on. But the kind level wey the girl give me, no gree make i leave am even when i don tidy things finish. She no send me dat time though she later confessed dat she liked me. She did that cos guys always think they can mess with her.
So you need to show dat guy say you belong. just don't overdo it.
Best of luck.
So long.

platinumnk:
shut up!
because i say u no fine boy
see how you dey vex!
who send you?
me no want to perish looking at you.
Commot from this thread
nkita tabiekwa gi amu, obele nsi meshhhew!
A far better chest puts me to sleep at night.
Jealousy- fire burn dem!

Perish ke?
You wey no fit show that ur small lepacious "sickle cell body". You don lean like toothpick.
Person wey climb on top of you go bruise tire, because na bones full everywhere, like mangala fish.
To dey waka na risk for you. U fit break leg join am.
As 21st bad-day don dey reach, na days dem dey count for you.
Tell ur mama say i go send am wreath.
***Onye ohi amu. Nne gi gba aka nwa***

odiaero:
@platin, hold u list tight, i no need am

O boy! You too much!
My cap still dey ground. No mind plat. Na chest syndrome dey worry am.
If she no see chest, she no go sleep.

@Gabry
You wan take style tell us say u be lesbo.
See ya mouth, you wan suck toto.

ElRazur:
Point of correction, to you it isn't. To me, I am still rolling on the floor laughing.  

Bros e no good na. She fit be ur sista na. Na only Baba God sabi tomorrow.

ElRazur:
I think it is hilarious.

Its not. Definitely not!
If you see the pains most ladies go thru because of their single status, you'll cry for them.
Its not hilarious at all.

@Poster,
I'll advise you to look for better places, not the net. Internet dating is merely for flings not a true relationship.
There are places you can meet good guys. Places like church,workplace and other cool places.
If you truly want a good husband, get ur nos off the forum, it'll do you no good.
Best of luck.
So long.

platinumnk:
aji otu nne gi
I no have time for your crayfish head.
Better men are here, waka pass
Suit yourself
I'll stick to my list then

***Clifford Orji rakwaa nne gi***
See ya head.
Sweet guy like me(Nne gi, o na-akpu dimpka)
because i no wan show my chest.
You wan carry fine boi chest dey do show.
e no go work.

^^^ Inferiority complex wan kill you die. That guy na human. Even denzel washington get woman wey dey f*uck am up.
Raise ur level, the guy go beg you to be wit am.

Since you usually have this feelings when anoda guy approaches her, its nothing but sheer jealousy.
You prefer her being single rather than having a boyfriend that might fight you for her time.
She doesn't see you as a boyfriend or lover but as a friend. If you tell her ur feelings, it wouldn't change anything unless she's secretly in love with you.
You can tell her ur feelings, but its likely it won't change a thing.
Best of luck.
So long.

platinumnk:
Bad mouth belle
because your body be like palm kernel
you dey shout up and down.
Abeg go and do pushups if u want to be noticed

If i want to be noticed? Laugh go kill me for hia.
Lekwa onye-ara.

@Odiaero,
No fall our hand.
The one wey you post fine like die.
I no no wetin dat girl dey look for chest.
No gree.

platinumnk:
if I cannot see muscles then you cant make my list  
I dont mind chest hair
Jealously will wound you.
Na u want to scatta this thread?
Abeg waka pass

Wetin concern u na? Abi person chop the thing wey dem keep for you?
If you wan look chest type "chest" for google, you go see am tire.