₦airaland Forum

HandOfChukwu: dont laugh at me you wh0re

Take it easy bro. People are just trying to have a good laugh and good clean fun. Light mood stuff. Nothing serious.

patriotic007: I always knew this unbunddling and privatisation of PHCN will create a lot of Jobs,......kudos to GEJ

Nice 1. And this is just one of the many unbundled PHCN DISCOs. TCN (Transmission Company Nigeria Ltd) also did massive recruitment in 2013.

Newly established Sovereign Wealth Fund went on recruitment drive in 2013. I still have the newspaper adverts.

After haters will fault Okonjo Iweala claim that millions of jobs have been created by GEJ's govt. And they will be the first to go and lobby for position there.

alivetofuckonly: Abeg make ona dey barn am o because God create my own prick for toto only o. No be for anus of guys weh no dey wash yansh after shiting

Gbam!
If this doesn't put them off gay life, then nothing will. Gross!

---

Bros G: Why do we just hate gays ?
They are still humans.

Not so sure, bro.
Even animals know better. Any creature who is confused about the correct hole, needs some tutoring from animals.

Na me talk am.

Lanspower: Why dont you keep quiet if you've got nothing meaningful to contribute to the thread? Oh you think your English is better? The bolded explains why you should please for heaven sake go back to elementary English class

Plz correkt d inglis mista Jonz.

* waiting *

Cupid4: the remote cause of GLO dwindling sales is poor seevice delivery, sometimes i do ask myself who h*ell is dia marketing manager? When other service providers were busy expanding their service and ntwk coverages, GLO was busy doling out *unproductive* millions out all in d name of PROMO, winning a million naira frm glo doesnt guarantee my loyalty to them so far i dnt get gud service from them, they hv comparative and sentimental advantage over others being an indigenous company but failed to take d chance, service delivery and gud ntwk coverage is d key which YELLO has been abu to leverage on odawise dey wud hv been bk to Mandela's country

Na bro & sis company na.


Their marketing director must be a born gambler. They're practically a kalo-kalo company. Last 2 years they chopped so much of my money on fake promo, texting YES, and giving me millions of useless points.
Ol' boy, when d scales fell from my eyes I yanked d bloody sim 4rm my phone.

invisikay: Most readers on this thread cannot appreciate what the OP is saying for many reasons, some think that earning 4m is good enough for him why is he complaining. ? Bla bla but the truth is that when you are on 4m and somebody wakes up and says you only get 2.7m now and the other 1.3 is based on performance then you will understand ...and when the OP says the seventy percent is all spent. See consider yourself as you are now whatever you earn monthly after paying the bills do you always have 30 percent remaining every month?

Before you say he is not managing well the truth is that that is not specified in his initial employment letter.

The truth of Globacom will eventually come out,, by the way I am a former employee.

Let me give you some facts

Globacom is where....

You spend 5 years of your career and never get to attend one training as in 1
You compute KPi monthly for 5 years and that KPI is not used for anything for once
subordinates can earn more that superiors
You get an offer to work as an expertriate in Ghana and suffer for it.
You get two consecutive promotions without any increase

The core of the problem of Globacom is HR issues and all these because they have no single regard for the human life. And they don't understand that staff are human beings who want to feel movement, experience attachment to your workplace, see integrity displayed by employers. I can assure you that staff dissatisfaction in glo will be about 90% with another 5%who are too fearful to say they are dissatisfied. Tell me is this how to run a company. Does this not have an effect on profitability. ?

Eventually it will, Let me go to adenuga, let him go and learn from his mate dangote on how to run a company....I am not sure that are averagely dangote pays as much as adenuga to his staff but better welfare. And the company is run with openness and not shrouded in darkness as in glo. We all can see what dangote has done for himself.

Let me give you an example of the corporate darkness in glo.

When you are employed you are employed by a company let's vixen ventures, saber nigeria enterprises ,contact services enterprises or manpower limited, and so to say outsourced to Globacom (no body that I know actually have glo letter of employment). When the time for confirmation comes you see the ritual (not sure whether the ritual still happens) you are told to resign from let's say saber nigeria enterprises..and you are wondering why Resign? The HR guys tells you to sign as fast as possible once you sign you are given three letters one letter of employment from a new umbrella ventures limited backdated to your initial employment date. Another letter of confirmation by umbrella ventures and a letter of deployment to Globacom. Please note this is not for some so called contract staff this is the way it was done for me the so called Glo full staff. You leave the confirmation session more confused about your identity as a staff.


@OP the truth is you have to get out of Babylon but do not be hasty. Plan your way out... settle debts....Readjust life ...be ready to take less pay in a company that offers less pay but better working environment.

Because Babylon the great will surely fall.

Bro, I feel for u. But on a lighter note, there must be something about glo employees and grammar.

Just saying

pDude: Same ol' shyt. Nigeria is a sunken ship. Better get visa to Gabon or Zambia.

Sorry I have to rebutt. Nigeria IS NOT A SUNKEN SHIP. I know Gabon (banana republic) & Zambia, neither is Eldorado

prymesolution: The Senate yesterday unanimously passed a harmonized Conference Committee report banning same sex marriage in Nigeria, a development that defies stiff western opposition to the ban.

Again, the Senate President, David Mark called on President Goodluck Jonathan to quickly sign the Bill into law.

"We have been under series of attack from different quarters. I think we believe in this Bill. The earlier we sign it into law, the better. We (Nigeria) have have many shortcomings, we don't one to add this one (same sex marriage) to it," said David Mark.

In detail the Bill passed by the Senate states that:

A marriage contract or civil union entered into between persons of same sex by virtue a certificate issued by a foreign country shall be void in Nigeria.

Marriage or civil union entered into between persons of same sex shall not be solemnized in any place of worship either Church or Mosque or any other place whatsoever called in Nigeria.

Only marriage contracted between a man and a woman either under Islamic Law, Customary Law or the Marriage Act is recognized as valid in Nigeria.

Persons that entered into a same sex marriage or civil union contract commit an offense and are jointly liable on conviction to a term of 14 years imprisonment each.

Any persons or group of persons that administers, witnesses, screens, abet and aids the solemnization of a same sex marriage contract or civil union or supports the registration, operation of gay clubs, societies and organizations, processions or meetings in Nigeria commits an offense and liable on conviction to a term of 10 years imprisonment.

http://www.infonubia.com/2013/12/nigerian-senate-bans-same-sex-marriage.html

PIB - Petroleum Industry Bill that would have revolutionised the oil & gas industry is there gathering dust for years, they wont pass it.
The bunch of mofos fixing fat salaries for themselves are busy passing bills that does not add anything to our development indices.

Children are being given away in marriage, abused, abandoned, denied education and basic healthcare, yet our Nero senators are busy fiddling having a ball.
Mtchewwwww.

For record, i dont believe in gay marriages or liaison. But i dont think this issue is among our top 200 problem.

Tunde Cole: [b][/b] This is a good news I must say. Here is a man who posseses great leadership quality and business acumen. I believe with Utomi as governor of Delta state, the positive impact to be induced with be of immense benefit.

Kudos to APC as it is set to produce another quality leader to the Nation.

Which "business acumen"? Please can u educate us more with practical examples?

Please go and research on how Utomi ran VW aground, then ran back to the classroom. Being a good lecturer on business does not mean you will succeed in running an enterprise. The business of running government is ine huge difficult enterprise.

Overall, I will still prefer him to the dunce currently on seat called Uduaghan.

kolaaderin: Flooding is the worst that can happen to a car, buying a flooded car is like buying the empty shell, virtually everything will need a replacement. dont even try it with a pole. its a nooo nooo nooo. i will recommend accidental cars to flooded. most accidental cars are mechanically and electrically sound all u need to do is find one with minor impact, may be fender or just bumper damage and be sure of no chases damage, its surely repairable. flooded, my brother Run dont dare it.

Thanks @koladerin. I Don pick race already. U hv saved me from big wahala.

luvinhubby: Don`t touch it even with a long pole.
Their issues are endless, even if you get the car running, you will keep having to repair or replace one part after the order even the replaced parts can even be replaced, especially the electrical components.
It`s an unwise choice.

Thanks my broda

Nashville: Pat Utomi is one of the brightest minds this country has at the moment. I hope he wins. But for a state that has elected criminals such as James Ibori and Emmanuel Uduaghan, it is going to be tough. But hope he can learn something from Rochas and spring a surprise victory.

Bright in theoretical economics at his LBS? yes. Putting those theories to practice? No. If he was that good in running a business concern, VON could not have collapsed so dramatically under his watch. I know people will jump at me blaming harsh govt policies. My answer: NTM Bauchi, Anamco Enugu are still in business. More recently, Innoson has set up a vehicle assembly plant at Nnewi assemblying buses and trucks. They must know something about running businesses, that Prof Utomi doesn't.

Same logic applies to Utomi's political theories.
You are very correct about the political sharks on ground in Delta state, and the state's legendary violatile ethnic politics.

Having said that, I believe he will still be 100 times better than the current blight called Uduaghan.

Abeg abeg abeg. Who ever knows this El-Loco Rufa-liar should please beg him to save my life. My doctor has just diagonised me with advanced case of laffing-cocosis.

He has seriously warned me that if don't stop reading El- Loco Rufa-liar's tweets, lafta may kill me one of this days

ISpiksDaTroof: Ummm…these are very serious allegations. But then again, lets face it, this is Nigeria:the land of political assassinations, sloppy planning, and where rumors eventually turn out to be truths. DO NOT PUT ANYTHING PAST A NIGERIAN POLITICIAN. The way I look at it, a man that : (1). won't mind his cronies divvying up money meant for the welfare of the people (2) will look past corruption (3) and attempt to give his wife Billions of the country's money to build a pet project for herself will not hesitate to send goons with guns after his perceived enemies to keep his power and his wealth.

Go ahead and underestimate GEJ at your own peril. Nigeria has been underestimating him from jump and he keeps on slapping them week in week out.

Oh really!!!
So GEJ is very smart after all?? And some dulllards who cannot show us their GCE O'Levels have the teeth to call him slowpoke, daft, and other unprintable names as if PhD's can be picked up by the roadside just by anybody.

Ok. We dey siddon dey look una.
The President's position wey una wan die put, dey on top of table. Let's see if name calling and twitter lies will deliver it to them.

Seriously, looks like El-Loco Rufai has run out of his schizophrenic medication. Someone should please get him fresh supplies before he rushes to hug a moving train believing it is father Christmas.

I don talk am oo oo. I know wan cry for person here ooo.

@OP : On the flip side, try and hide your identify because with this rambling and poor grammar, it will be hard to convince another employer to take u.

If your CV is structured like this, the HR chaps will just bin it.

I feel for u. To celebrate Christmas in an empty stomach is not a joke. And children 2nd term school fees are due this January.

Take heart, dust up your CV, and begin to market yourself . Employers do not respect staff who are so loyal, they are willing to work for free. They will think you have no choice. Just leave the place.

OK. Thanks for letting us know.
Please let's clap for this attention seeking nitwit

Next tweet plz.

autodoctor: We are an Abuja based independent car repair and servicing centre and we offer free technical advice to the general public on automotive related issues. We also offer every service you could imagine from a car repair garage, from car servicing, mechanical and electrical diagnostics and repairs, clutch, exhaust and suspension repairs through to ECU fault code reading and diagnostics. We have the latest state of the art tools for diagnostics right up to dealer levels including special tools for carrying out extensive repairs. We also have an international network of vehicle spare parts suppliers and we deliver to your door within a week of ordering.

Whatever it is that you need, we ensure that you recieve an excellent service from all of our staff. We have friendly and courteous staff, who are dedicated to ensuring our customer service standards are of the highest levels at all times. Over the years we have developed an excellent reputation with our clients for the quality of our service, along with our competitive prices.

Call us on 081 62907680 for more info


Accept it or not that neither the roadside mechanic or the ultra-modern service centre are the best options available to any motorist here in Nigeria. To begin with, the roadside mechanic is limited in capacity to work on most modern vehicles that are still original in their composition. The advancement in automotive technology and science always proves a difficult challenge for them as they lack adequate education and training in current automotive technology.

Most cars on the road these days have complex electronics such as micro processors that instruct the functions of components and accesories found in cars. Due to these method of operations, diagnostic equipments had to be invented to enable communication with control units in order to ascertain their well-being and carry out repairs in a safe and economical manner. Most road side mechanics lack the ability to use these equipments talk less of owning even the most basic ones nor the right tools for the job. They would proceed to work on any car even when they havent got the foggest idea on what to do. (Afterall it doesnt cost anything to say to the victim that the car couldnt be fixed).

On the other hand, since comming back to Nigeria after living and working in the UK for over 12 years and where I have an MOT centre and an automotive service and repair centre, I have had a look at a huge number of cars and 4x4s that have defied even the most modern garages in Nigeria from fixing them. It really beggars belief that these major companies rip off hapless Nigerians through heavy sign up fees and very expensive labour charges without doing the job well or if at all solving the problems.

One car I had a look at was a 2008 model Mercedes GL450 with airmatic suspension problems. The car belongs to an ex governor so I dont believe that repair costs was an issue. This car had been to several major companies with this problem only for the wrong diagnosis to be made and the car still leaning on its side. New pump, new valve block, new suspension airbags and God knows what else, but the problem remained. The owner had given up on his pride and joy until after almost six moths of it sitting in another glorified roadside workshop, I was invited to have a look at it. I took it into my workshop and did a detailed analysis and check on the operation of the system only to discover that no one ever noticed a leak on the compressor to valve block pipe. I temporarily mended the pipe so that I could test the car and like a miracle, everything was fine. I then ordered a new pipe from the United tates and replaced the mended one and fingers crossed, its getting to 8 months now and no complain yet.

How dumb could these mechanics be not notice a simple hiss?

Bottom line is dont surrender your car to anyone who is not competent enough to fix it. How do you know this?, Ask them as many questions as you can on what may be the problem and judge from their explanations if they know what they are talking about.

Good luck.

@Autodoctor please do you have experience with flooded cars?
I created a thread on this subject, please post your experience or technical opinion here or in that thread.

https://www.nairaland.com/1576621/flooded-cars-redeemable-what-experience

Thanks

sholatech: Naija dealers will always tell you it's a good buy. I fell into the trap of one and so from personal experience, please stay off the flooded cars. Dealer had persuaded me that he had bought so many and the cars will start once in Nigeria and need very minimal repairs.

He ordered mine and for 3-months after arrival into Nigeria, we've changed virtually all parts of the car. Only the body was good. While waiting, I decided to order same car clean title which I now drive without any issue. Cost comparison, the clean title car is now cheaper than the so-called fixed flooded car which still gives issues especially electrical components

Wao!!! Thanks @sholatech for sharing. Real eye opener

BizBooks: Update:

10. We now have a sample picture of what the N1.2M made in Nigeria car might look like.
See picture below. Picture courtesy of Ndu Chuks.

Why must it look SMART car posted by Ndu Chuks? Why cant it look like the Tata Nano which is even cheaper?

In any case, and with all due respect this is a wrong interpretation of this govt policy.
Please note that objective of govt is not for manufacturers to invent new Nigerian brand of car, but to encourage importers to assemble at least the brands they currently import.

solomon111: Don't be naive.
If it were another country,i would agree with you.
Unfortunately,this's Nigeria with all its inferiority complexes,unpatriotism and an utter disdain and disregard for locally made products.
I can assure you that as long as there's a readily available foreign alternative, Nigerians would never patronize the local manufacturers.
So,just giving the local manufacturers incentives alone will not do much for them as long as their targeted markets has been completly taken over by toyota and co.
The only way we can truly grow indigenous auto industry in NIGERIA is to go the hard way.

But govt should only propose increased tariff for existing manufacturing plants. As far as I know there is no single car assembly plant functioning in Nigeria. What we have are two truck and bus assembly plants: Innoson plant at Nnewi and NTM at Bauchi (not sure if NTM is still functioning).
There is absolutely no move or indication that the following importers: Coscharis (BMW, Range Rovers, Porche, Jaguar, Mini), Stallion Group owned by Vaswani brothers (Honda, VW, Audi, Skoda); Dana Group (importers of Daewoo and Hyundai), Toyota Nig Ltd (owned by Chief Adeojo), Globe Motors (Honda & Mercedes), Bras (Mercedes), RT Briscoe (Ford), SCOA (chevrolet and Nissan) have any car assembly plant under construction.

To make matters worse, govt begins to give them importation moratorium and waivers, they will simply sell at new prevailing elevated market prices once the new tariff kicks in, ripping off govt one side, and poor masses on the other.

We all know that the bulk of the cars bought by Nigerians are used cars, though the age are younger of recent. It will hit the poor and the middle class hard. Even prices of parts will go through the roof. So even if you own a car already don't rejoice yet.

The tariff increase should have been gradual, scaled to align with progress in construction and streaming of new car manufacturing plants.

Please note that objective of govt is not for manufacturers to invent new Nigerian brand of car, but to encourage importers to assemble at least the brands they currently import. So it has nothing to to with market already being taken over by Toyota and other known brands.

Very interested in this one. Experts please help out with specific workshops, addresses, contact details, and experience installing them.
Thanks.

I see lots of flooded cars listed in Copart and Auction Export site, but it attracts scant attention compared to heavily accidented vehicles.

My egbons and experts in the house, please kindly share your expert opinion and experience with buying, fixing and selling flooded cars in Nigeria.
Can our road side mechanics and large garages rehabilitate these vehicles, especially the famed fear of damage to electrical and electronic components?

PLEASE I NEED YOUR HELP. Thanks in advance and Happy New Year!!!

2nd pic: pancake tinz

mightyAY: Give thanks to God n Pray for a prosperous 2014.

Good for you. Happy new year

9jaSceptic: Reduce the no of church houses being built on every nook and crany and let firms who can employ a significant amount of labour make efficient use of these premises and there'll be growth in the Economy as a result of the unemployed or underemployed resources( Premises where church are built) which are now employed and efficiently employed respectively.

What is this one again
Is accommodation the problem of industries in Nigeria? I thought epileptic power was the main issue.
And why should churches build premises for firms? Are we having shortage of land in Nigeria?