₦airaland Forum

sirdouglas:
You have not answered my question bro. The girl you impregnated at 14 how far?? I hope you married her then and did all the marriage rites??

Coz If you didn't and you are here taking it personal for God's knows why, maybe out of regret or frustration I don't know but take it elsewhere. I am really more you or will ever imagine. I am old enough to take my decision and nothing will happen. If you have any wisdom in you, you ought to know that this is here today because I have no intention of hurting anybody.

I know that frustration is in that country so I wouldn't blame some of you you for the excessive aggression and unnecessary outburst.

For the castrated fool that is calling me an idiot. I am not offneded cos I am dead sure fear no go let am near me in person not to talk call me an idiot so is nothing. Words are cheap and free. If you leave this comment section it will be your shame.

Mumu...

You travel yesterday don dey feel like Rambo...idiot.

You know when I travel comot for Nigeria? I sure say you still dey carry cattarh for nose with your tear tear pant dey play for sand.

I knew it had been all about this...to let us know you have traveled out of Nigeria and as such those still remaining including the innocent girl and your unborn child have become idiots...abi?

You'll get your works worth trust me.

I know your type...

Your type dey fear babes wey tear eye..na mgekes wey you fit manipulate you dey carry.

Nonsense

Na so we take dey old finely...

Na God do am like so...

pesinfada:
No mind d idiot......... small change weh dey him hand dey shakam

The stingy thing think say na small children dey here wey go dey tell am sweet words wey him wan hear.

E carry another man pikin dey nack for ground Bleep her anyhow...no be say e dey care for the girl o according to him words, na now wey God wan super glue am with the girl e come remember say she be mgbeke...you never see life my guy. Karma

Thank God say you get sisters...just imagine a guy treating one of them exactly the same way you are confidently stating treating this naive girl.

You never see anything.
Life is bigger than you think bro...even if na Mars you go, you must collect.

Be wise and guided.

Not judging you, just stating the bitter undiluted truth you'd naturally hate to hear.

Insult me till next year, I care not.

A very sad situation to be in especially when you begin to understand how you could have avoided being in such a mess.

I hope and pray you get help soon sis.

Stay strong.

martinskelly:
Sirdouglas, i have been in this kind of dilemma before but mine was slightly different from yours anyway though she is not educated but smart in her own way and she is beautiful, work as a contract staff(Casual as they call it) in the same company i work, she knows how to hairdress people(i mean hairdresser).
The problem in my own case is that the first time i saw her i just felt a thing for her(Cupid), i talked to her the first time she snubbed me and on several occasions i try making her see reasons that i like her but she still refused me but i got know from her best friend the reasons for her refusal that because i was an Admin staff(Parmanent) and she is contract staff and i just wanted to use and dump her.
To cut the story short, i had to brush up her mindset and we started dating but i have never ever imagine myself marrying her just a fling with her is what i desire, but God come catch me o, after a year of dating her(fling) she got pregnant for me(i knew i was responsible coz during that time i was the only one in her life) she wanted abortion; Nope! i wanted the child not her(if u know).
I stopped her from working and was catering for all her needs but the funny part is that we did not tell her parent up until she delivered but only her sibling knew because they were around but the parent are in the village, Well to God be the glory my own parent accepted her because she delivered a bouncing baby boy(Even if it is otherwise it doesn't change a thing)

So bro, its your own decision and your parent acceptance that matters not even your best friends nor nairalanders, so decide wisely.


Note: i did introduction(iku aka) after like 8 months of her pregnancy, she is from akwa ibom and I'm from IMO and my son is nine months.

Way to go, brother, I doff my hats for you mate.

Use your hand mould your thing the way you want am. Who no like am can goan dieee.

The op dey here dey talk English and how him wan take dey abroad for five years. Who cares.

sirdouglas:
IT IS PERSONAL BRO
You sound ridiculous. Do you think this is a movie script?? This is my life bro, my life!!

If you got a girl pregnant at 14 I guess the girl is how old ten?? And you aborted the pregnancy obviously cos you sound very inhuman and unreasonable.

I was traveling she is aware. Did you read the part were I said she was making fun of me that my sperm is not working?? She wanted to be pregnant. Youknow that kind of stupid love that makes a girl wants to carry a man's child. I know she never wanted the abortion cos if she did, she wouldn't have told her mother. She would have done it and cut ties with me at worst so don't even go there.

I know you honestly want to see me as a villian but remember she is 20 at the time of the pregnancy. She an adult even before the law. So stop this your witchhunting, is not helping matters.

Go and sit your nonsense ass down.

Go look for oyibo or slay queen marry, when your eye clear na double knee you go take cry come look for this mgbeke.

You are a cunning, deceptive and self-centered predator who fed fat on the naive girls innocence.

You dey look for people wey wan tell you wetin you want hear to justify your actions.

Nonsense an ingredients.

sirdouglas:
Oga she is really not a beauty if that is what you are implying. And while I was in Nigeria, I was doing really good for myself. I could afford girls for more beautiful than her. I met few, if you read through my post you will see that I said in the first few lines that I date at that time for the sole purpose of marriage. I WANTED TO MARRY HER BRO!!! .....why are you people so mean and heartless?? Even before I met her I know I will be traveling. And I told her as soon as the time is right. I told her almost a year before I travelled and you saying all this is very bad of you and tell more the kind of person you are.

If it happens to be your sister and you decides to do away with the pregnancy I wouldn't object to it. The blood will be on your head. Those kids are not a mistake despite the situation. You are telling me in other words that I should have aborted the twins?? Really?
Well, I leave you to your conscience. Like I said from the beginning. Getting married to her is not completely out of the table but I wish I could find an alternative to save the day.

I wouldn't descend to your level to trade words with you but I know that I am not a bad person and I never for once wish evil for that girl or planned anything that would hurt her.

I wonder why you are taking it personal.

I judge issues based on how they are presented.

Anybody wey God bless with small wisdom can tell from your first post and this how dishonest a human you are.

You can tweak or spin your story anyhow to fool the gullible's here...my brother I don see 99 for life e remain one.

Most of my comments on here are based on personal experiences or those from people around me.

If I tell you say e no get wet in you want tell me, believe me...e don tey wey the zip wey dey my eye spoil.

I got a girl pregnant at 14...go figure

sirdouglas:
You can see how people with perfect lives are condemning me already. I doubt if some of them read all that I said.

The thing is this, I will be spending at least 5 years abroad. I am sure I am spending five years there because I decided it and I am not living illegally so I will only leave when I want to. She knows that too. I said at least because I don't know what tomorrow holds and I really don't want to be in Nigeria anytime soon and I just left. Barely three months now.

I can't keep her waiting and the two kids is going to make it really difficult. It would have been easier if it is one.

What I am asking is, I don't know anambra traditions very well but there are parts that won't let you go with the child if you didn't pay the bride price or iku aka I really don't know how the whole thing is done and whoever that marries the girl goes with the child. I really want her to get married and I am really sorry this is happening but I wouldn't want to lose my claim on my kids if finally, they are mine to anyone or situation.

Bro, you should have simply allowed that young girl abort that fetus and moved on with her life because it is obvious you already had it all figured out and knew you'd be away for five years hence, your pressure on her to keep the pregnancy as a back up plan for a kid while you are out there exploring other pussayss.

Now tell me, if someone would treat your sister this same way how would you feel or react.

This is cunningly selfish and evil. Pure and simple my guy.

I say it as it is and was presented...

And he is still breathing?

Na where I gbadun Akwa Ibom and Cross River people be this.

This guy for don resemble South Sudanese.

AntiMCU:
Nothing. Just stating a fact!

The people you see and envy from the outside and feel have managed ill-gotten gotten monies well, if only you know what is happening within their personal lives.

Some have weddings where receptions lasted longer than weddings.

Some share their wives with their gateman and co....

Many end up with kids who are nothing but a curse.

Loads are treating one strange ailment or the other..

I can go on and on...

Do not allow the aesthetics fool you.

Live honest and right...

Judging from your narrative, it is safe to say the young girl is a 'beauty without brains' whatever that means, and I'm sure her beauty was what got you hooked before you tasted the pie and subsequently realized she wasn't so smart.

Bro, I'm going to be straight up with you like I always do man...Selfish and self-centered is what you are (in bold).

You never hear say meat wey person no dey chop say him no suppose use teeth share am?

Oh because she was pretty, undemanding and mgbekeish, you decided to hold on to her, leading her on, and only started being honest to her about your plans when you had started making your travel plans and thus realized she'd be too local for your new status?

My bro, if that girl were my sister, and you had the effrontery to come to my house to spill what you just did here, you wouldn't have been able to use that visa of yours, and I'd have personally aborted the pregnancy with my bare hands. What insult.

If she's not good enough for you to wife, she shouldn't have been good enough for you to dickk and of course mother your baby(s).

This is even worse than a baby mama thingy, this is a baby factory one.

All the story about you making it clear to her that you won't be marrying her are just some cunning silly afterthoughts of a chronic user who had a game plan from the get-go.

There's something I'll tell you now if you like take am if you no like leave am.

I just hope and pray you won't come back looking for and begging this lady in the future and by what time it'd have been late already because you'd pay for your bid to selfishly destroy this young girl's life and dump her. For whom I ask after one o'clock?

Look around you and you'd find examples of cases like this where the man would come begging after years when his recompense would have been served steamy hot.

You no see GEJ and PEJ? How you see dem upon say PEJ dey break bottle with English?

You had better retraced your step, my friend, learn to love that babe, marry her and start a family with her or else you go regret am o.

Forget all these your later later excuses abeg

NB

I am sharing the story below as a result of the op's and his ilks unruly attack on me and my submission just to make them see life from a different perspective and understand from what point my advise was made...


Growing up in the standard Lagos face me I slap you setting in Mafoluku Oshodi when the Military boys held sway in Nigeria, most of the matures here or history savvy's would understand how hopeless and depressing the economy and general standard of living was at this time.

Now, daddy and mummy had chosen to manufacture 11 of us as kids, and I'd be saddled with the onerous task of being the Nigerian "first son" with loads of expectation from me on finding a way to alleviate the family's situation and by extension better the lots of kids I had been brought into the world with at my parents behest and not because I had chosen to come to them.

You can at best imagine daddy, mum, we the kids and a cousin living with us then having to jostle for a space in two-room living space from a sixteen-room face me I face you living set up.

Not able to wrap my mind around the kind of life I had been born into and in the quest to better mine and my family's lot, I decided I was going to quit school, find a way to travel abroad, and go hustle for my family.

Before then, a bachelor neighbor Oli, had chosen our house as the only trusted one where he could drop his keys because he lived with his boys/friends who were all traders at Idumota.

There was one of his roomies who was in his 40's then (Ikenna), he was always ever the last to leave home and would, as usual, drop their key at mine.

My immediate younger sister (Mary) had just finished high school, naive and still a virgin, she'd naturally be at home most times.

In the midst of all these, I had found out I could risk my life through the desert in search of a better life abroad, after all how I want to take get a visa, and if I die, I die but I had decided I'd rather die trying instead of sitting, watching my family ravaged by poverty and still die. All die na die I had told my young self.

Got myself prepped, lied to my dad and made him raise me some little cash, and into the desert, I proceeded.

For two whole years, I had languished on the road and was only able to communicate with my family only after about 6 months of leaving home. For sure they'd thought I had gone back to my maker.

After the two unforgettable years of languishing on the road, I had succeeded into Spain eventually, called up daddy to break the news to him, he didn't quite believe me. Note that this was before the era of mobile phones in Nigeria. Sensing that daddy was having a hard time believing I was in Spain finally, I had dropped the line, did a western union money transfer from the locotorium I was calling from, called him back and furnished him with the transfer details.

Then and only then was I able to convince daddy otherwise.

And then, keeping to my nomadic and adventurous lifestyle, I had proceeded on to move on to the Netherlands to go tell the authorities there how I and my friendly 'horse' on whose back I had ridden to Europe were the only ones surviving from my little village in Delta, hence my request to seek asylum in their country.

Luckily for me, I had succeeded in convincing them to allow me to stay in the Netherlands and would be given a weekly stipend as pocket money back then in camp. From this money I'd call home on weekends, talk to my family and always assured my other siblings that I'd make sure they had the best education having slaughtered mine on the altar of "I wan bail family out".

During one of such weekend calls, after the usual pleasantries exchanged, daddy had told me in a stutter....

" Mary, your younger sister fell pregnant and now has a daughter"...

Ah ah... I had muttered in obvious instant deflation plus disappointment, but I had refused to get angry, judge my sister or castigate her.

I asked daddy, how, when and by whom...


Still stuttering, he had told me it was like a month after I had left Nigeria, she initially wasn't forthcoming with who was responsible, how it had brought shame to the family which I could imagine knowing how our neighbors were, and how even some people had been insinuating that daddy who was a deeper life pastor might be responsible because no one could make a sense of how Mary who was a home girl could fall pregnant. The whole matter weak me like dodo, but I listened with rapt attention anyways.

And then, daddy said she later confessed that Ikenna, who we called Brother Ikenna was responsible. He had denied responsibility but when my battalion siblings faced him, he had accepted responsibility with zero plans to marry her just like this op.

I told dad how disappointed I was, and how angry I am that they had kept it away from me for that long, told them not to worry that I'd take care of my sister and the kid and hung up.

Fast forward to 2008 when I visited Nigeria, the baby Vic had grown, obviously abandoned with my family. She'd grown up to see my mum as hers and Mary as aunty Mary until recently.

Levels had changed, I had improved my family's situation, built them a house in Lagos, Ikenna gone with the wind, and would soon resurface looking for daddy's number and whoever could point him on how to locate my family.

By this time he should be in his 50s, no life, wife or any other kid. Come and see abeg.


My phone would go bellowing one day, upon picking up, the voice at the other end had been subtle and subdued with a "good afternoon sir, na me Ikenna"...

Ah ah..bwoda Ikenna, na me you dey call sir?

He went on, abeg no vex for wetin happen I know say I Bleep up...wetIn i wan tell bwoda Ikenna after how many years... I simply dropped the call.. I no fit shout.

The long and short of it all is that, today over 20 years later...

Brother Ikenna's life is nothing to write home about.

Mary, my younger sister is today happily married and would soon be one of the youngest grandmas because Vicky, the kid in question had grown into a very beautiful young promising graduate.

Beautiful...

Him say wetin??

GeniusWannabe:
People like you disgust me. You know nothing about marriage!

I puke on you...

DateMynd44:
are u insane?
the guy said he's God fearing that's why he has avoided girls and you're here dishing a jonadab advise

You are a dimwit.

AntiMCU:
It favors in the long run if well managed. Forget that karma stuff.

Wetin concern me and you?

E no dey favor anybody on the long run my brother trust me. Everything wey you dey see na temporary when the time comes scores will be settled

That's why you see some old men turned street jesters wey people go dey use dey play anyhow dey talk say ' that guy been get money those days...him reign well well...how you want take reign well with another man sweat.

Find one legit thing abeg. However small your one one naira be...appreciate and manage am well

Lol

kiyosaki1:
More catholic than the Pope .

Mine is 'Poper"..

Someone else coined the first...a little tweak by me is called modification..

Rubbish

bendike:
What does that mean?

Welcome guys

Bridget95:
obho kìan or obho shian in Esan

Obokhian obhio

Good one...

Chelsea has always been Nigeria/Negro friendly

Nice one...

Chelsea is definitely Nigeria and Negro friendly....

Let's hope you can usurp DStv to their own extortionist game by giving them a run for their programs at a pocket friendly price.

KidsNEXTdoor:
You can't hide your sickness... You can never condemn the coza pastor... We all know why..

But you will soon be crushed

Na brain dey pain you asswipe....

Mumu wey no sabi read to comprehend

Dolt

jabberjawz:
That's like 143M on the table....not to talk about the one on the floor......left alone the ones stashed in the bank, stocks & real investment........Damn I wish I had a quarter of that....only a quarter...

143 ke...thats 1.5mUSD on that table alone.

KidsNEXTdoor:
You will be caught soon

Lol...

Mumu raise to power 100

E be like say you use head nack ground when dem born you. If you meet me for real life you no go fit talk piiim

Twitter toris....

Can't wait to see the many overpriced politicians houses in Abuja erode by 90%.

Where is the Toyin?

Bloggers bloggers

Talk about trying to be 'Poper' than the Pope himself.

Foolish ignorant and hypocritical dimwitted fools whose leaders keep raping them without condoms.

NB

I no understand who dey correct me say na "more Catholic than the pope". Na person coin that one. Modification is allowed especially in my pidgin lingua..." Poper than the Pope.