₦airaland Forum

Ok Big4050,


Is everyone except for Christians going to hell?




Even those in which Christianity is not predominant in their respective vicinity?

^^^^^

What exactly is the lie?

That Muslims dont threaten Christians with hell?


Serious?

logicboy: Wow. How does that make sense? If you see a guy that you dont know helping your child today, will you say that you dont know him the next day? Is it not Jesus that said that if you help the poor you help him? Why would God reject someone that helped his children and accept someone who did not help but only had faith?

Big4050,

Do you have any explanation for the above?


Since you guys seem to know what is on God's mind, and seem to have the list of who goes to hell or not.

Thank you.

rastamouse: Why is this so difficult for you to understand? if you can stop human trafficking, bring world peace, end famine and feed every needy child, what will prevent you from accepting JESUS as your LORD and SAVIOR? It is not like making the decision will cost you anything

Individual choice!!!!

No muslim is forcing you to accept Muhammed and threatening you with hell if you don't accept their ways!


And if they are, you must see them as a joke and feel confident with the religion of your choice!

Why then are you holding that very same position and holding those with different mind-sets to the ransom of 'hell'?

bigd4050:
When it comes to Christianity, only faith and repentance alone will bring you to God. If I brought world peace, ended famines and brought food to every single child, and stopped the human trafficking market, I would have done some very good things. But they have no relation to God because none of those acts were done for him or to further his kingdom. Works alone will not save anyone, because everyone has sinned and that makes them worthy of Hell.

Dear Friend,

If doing these wonderful acts;

-Bringing world peace
-Ending famines
-feeding every child
-stopping human trafficking

have no relation to God, then one must wonder what kind of God you are serving!

I have always felt some sort of 'selfishness' with religious people! Its really sad.

One would have thought that they, 'religious folks', would be the most tolerant set of people. But alas, bigotry is the order of the day.


It either our way or hell/destruction! Since there are several hells including the islamic hell and the Christian hell, there seem to be no hope for humanity!

Every one is going to some sort of hell.
It's farcical and hilarious

Okija_juju: Mercy was in my school then. . NNSS Akasso PHC. The babe been no too fine then, but see as she just blow over night!

So, Okija. You were a Navy Boy!

I was in NNSSABK!


Navy boys do it better!

scopusng: http://dailytimes.com.ng/article/ibori-sentencing-live-updates


1111 (Day 1): James Ibori, wearing a black suit and a gold watch has just been brought into the court. He smiles and makes a friendly gesture towards his family members.

1032 (Day 1): The crowd is harassing an official of the Nigerian High Commission just outside the court.

1018 (Day 1): Large crowd of Ibori supporters gathered outside the court. Reporters are having a difficult time gaining access.

^ Just plain sad!

bibiji: YOU CANT JUST STAY WHERE EVER U ARE AND ASSUMED WE AR FOLLOWIN SOMEONE BLINDLY. WHO AR U 2 PASS SUCH A VERDICT? IF U AR XTAIN @ ALL U WIL NO DAT SPIRITUAL TINS ALWAYS LOOK FOOLISH. ANYWAY, IT IS WORKIN 4 US & GOD HAS SENT DIS MAN TO LIBERATE HUMANITY 4RM D OPRESSION OF THE DEVIL, WE ARE LIBERATED, WHAT ABOUT U?

You seem to be the foolish one my dear.

'God has sent dis man to liberate humanity from oppression...'

^ the above is the most foolish statement on this thread. Since the advent of the fraud you call 'man of God', has there been a time when humanity has not been oppressed?

The Fraud fed you with some asinine mandate and your ignorant mind digested without making any effort to think.

Tell me, who is the foolish one?

Maxidoe: You need to grow up,i just wanted people asking for forgiveness to understand what pobably transpired and unfortunately for you all you could dicipher is porn,the hypocrisy of nigerians knows no bound,pretence,holier than thou attitude,nothing wrong in what wrote,supposed to e for 18 and above,lets not derail the thread.

Yea right!

I'm sure the Op will send you a thank-you card for your sublime description for what 'probably transpired'!

Maxidoe: I have read the reponse to the OP's seek for advise and it seems most peeps are not married,you say forgive and forget,forgive and forget your wife's infidelity with a friend,it takes the grace of God oh,and those of you saying he should have gone to beg her to come back,so that each time their is an arguement she will live the house and be begged to come back abi.They were into each other on two diffrent occassions meaning he kisssed her,sucked her booobs,probably suucked her pu-ssy too and also finger phucked her,while on her side she probaly stroked and played with his pe-nis probably sucked it and moaned passionately on 2 diffrent occasions,what the OP meant by into each other is that they did everything except putting his pe-nis into her pusssy,if she was your wife what would u do? do you think that marriage can ever be the same again?can he erase this from his memory?can he trust her again?do you knw what it takes for a married woman to allow somebody else to smoooche her?And when it happened the fisrt time,she did not run home but she waited till it happened the second time,and it would have probably happened the third,fourth time and continously if family did not resolve it.My advise is this,you knw youself more,what you can take,can you still love and respect her,can you still make love to her like nothing happened? if you can then forgive but if you cant my brother its all up to you.Buy kitchen cabinet instead of paying a daughter's school fees,and leaving the house cos ur husband got angry and shouted on you,and away for about 30 days,ridiculous,like someobody said you dont have a good wife and i agree.

Damn!!!

What goes on in that mind of yours?

Too much por.n.!!!

emmatok: what will you do if she insist on staying.

1. Inform her parents that they should get ready for another wedding, because their daughter is about to get married to my friend

2. Tell my foolish friend to come and get the rest of his 2nd wife's stuff in the house.


Jokes aside, if not that the friend had ulterior motives from the onset, a good friend would make her return to her husband's house that very night with the except if she had been abused by the husband.

^ Mmmm

Something is definitely not right!

I assume you are a lady, would you allow your 'adult' husband to go and stay in your friend's house for up to 4weeks?


The best thing to do is not to leave your wife in another man's house, you find a way to resolve the issue!

Ask yourself, if was the best thing, how come he is having these problems now?

Jay Alex: That's when we had the big falling out..i was angry and furious and shouted on her,when i came back she and my daughter had gone to my best friend's house.

^ First mistake

Jay Alex: I went there took my little girl and left her with my friend and his wife..

^ Second mistake

Jay Alex: he said he had 'touched' my wife while she held up with them,categorically they didn't sleep together,but then twice he said they were in each other..i left

^ Third mistake

I would have punched his face!

Jay Alex: what do i do with my wife? Where do i start with her?

You start by getting the truth from her, only after that can the healing begin.

Your wife might have rebuffed his advances, and may feel she does not want to cause issues by telling you. However, that is no excuse as she should have told you and warn you about such a friend.

A person that can sleeps with his friend's wife can also kill that friend

Jay Alex: they didn't sleep together,but then twice he said they were in each other..

Dear friend, what did he mean by this?

davidylan: Bro all this na story. I tried the "love conquers all" stuff before and it backfired big time. When you are getting married, pls find a woman who is on the same wavelength as you. It is EMOTIONALLY DRAINING to be with someone who is 100% dependent on you for everything down to toothpicks.

Mr David,

That you tried it before and backfired do not mean the same will happen to others. I agree with having same wavelenght, i.e ideologies, ambition and goals.


I dis-agree that financial background should be the 'only' factor to consider when choosing a partner.

For example,

A lot of celebrities go with partners with similar 'financial' wave-length and still don't last, whilst those that opt for the 'lower' ladder often break down too, but less often. And the same goes vice-versa.

My point is, the character of a person is way more important than the person's position on a wealth ladder. However, we all have preferences and values we want in a partner,and if finances ranks high to some, I greatly respect that.

@naijasexy

I think we can agree to dis-agree. Nice one

naijasexy: As for that one making a silly joke that he hopes I find my "sultan of whatever".. Well, how do you know I have not found him already?
You guys have to emancipate yourselves from mental slavery. Look on the positives and shy away from the negatives. You can find someone who would love you for you, and who would still meet your financial needs.

Madame, take it easy, can;t you take a joke again! haba!

Anyways, you mention emancipation from slavery which, to me is in sharp contrast to what you seem to stand for.

Inability to look at the contents of a character and judge based on the material worth of a person is mental slavery to me!

To choose not to be with someone based on the perceived 'poor' background of a person is not only unfair but discriminatory.

Again, you cant just look on the positives and shy away from negatives in a relationship madame, you deal with both the positives and negatives.

Where the partner is weak, you carry them. And aspects where you are weak you should get picked up!

Your last statement is ideal, but like I mentioned earlier -life is not as clear-cut like that- 'you don't get to eat your cake and have it'

Look at it this way!

You may find someone who would love you for you,and who would still meet your financial needs.

You may find someone who would not love you for who you are, and who would still meet your financial needs.

You may find someone who would love you for who you are, and would not meet your financial needs.

You may find someone who would not love you for who you are, and would not meet your financial needs.

The odds are 4 to 1. Meaning you may have to try 3 previous relationship before you hit the right one or may hit the right one straight away if you are lucky. Nothing is that straight-forward.


Naijasexy, you sound like a really nice person, And I see you are only being honest about your position,and I admire you for that.

No hard feelings, we are all learning.

naijasexy: ^ It is what it is for me man, and I say everything I do without the slightest feeling of remorse. I wonder if there is not one person who would "love you for who you are" and still be okay financially. Why do we always have to look on the negatives?
My heart desires are what God will grant me, in fact, He is already leading me on that path.
My stance remains unchanged and this is the last I would speak on this issue.

It was nice sharing ideas with you, Dare2think. Absolutely looking forward to doing so again.

With Pleasure,

Hope you get what your heart desires!

>Sultan of Brunie<

naijasexy: I would consider it a "prayer answered" simply means I would think of it as a favor from God and not because I am deserving of it and not what you are misconstruing that statement to mean.

That is just the way life is and we have to deal with it. If it is your desire to chose a poor (and I mean extremely poor) chick over one that is okay, then absolutely, go ahead. You would deal with the responsibilities that come with that when they begin to surface. I am no ready to bear the burden of another when I know it could have totally been avoided.

That's all I am saying.

Actually, my desire is to 'choose' the right partner, rather than the rich patrner, that will love me for who I am, and that I will love for who she may be, regardless of color, financial standing or creed!

Someone that I know will be there when 'for worse' starts rearing its head into the marriage! Such a person's previous financial standing, be it good or bad would be inconsequential then.

However, like I said, I respect your opinions and I hope you are not getting agitated! If so, ma bi nu!

One more thing, a favour from God, in my opinion, would not be averting you from a 'poor' guy! It would be averting you from a 'poor' mind, as a poor guy can change his status with hardwork and determination but its hard for a 'poor' mind to change

naijasexy: Eeerm.. Dare2think, I thought we were talking about wealth and not the other things listed above? Those are factors to be considered as well and I am not stupid, nor do I have my head in the clouds. When it comes right down to it, the aforementioned would be factored in. I would not marry a wife-batterer because he is rich neither would I tolerate a cheating man because he's got some money. I am speaking on the assumption of "all things being equal".

Nope dear, we were talking about what you considered a 'answered prayer', which you stated as being married to a rich guy!

I only opted to bring you to reality, which is that even the so-called rich guy comes along with baggages. I used those examples only to illustrate how complex and complicated a relationship can be, which makes excluding a person based on finances alone a bit 'unrealistic'.

Once again, everyone have different approaches to what they want in a partner and it just happens that you dont want a poor guy. Which is to be respected.

My point is, it is not as clear-cut like that as life as a funny way of not giving us what we desire, instead it gives us what we need. One may go through life looking for a 'specific' type of partner only to realise that they may fall for the exact opposite of what they wanted!

And yes, that one is rich, is only a minute factor in a long list of considerations that one needs to consider when choosing a partner. But alas you have excluded someone based only on that factor without even looking at what that person may bring to the table and complete the puzzle of one's life.

Ironically, the finances should even be the last on the 'rich' spouse's mind, as if they are truly rich, they should't be worried about the other that is not as rich.

naijasexy: It is not my wish to get married into a poor family and I do not feel sorry saying it. Again, I wouldn't consider getting married to a rich guy a right/ entitlement, I would consider it a prayer answered.

If you do not agree with my views, you are free to disregard them.

Lol, a prayer answered!

What about his other 'baggages' asides from being 'rich'?

For example, -a rich guy that pounds his wife day and night
-a rich guy that seriously cheats
-a rich guy that emotionally abuses the partner
-and all other variations attributed to being a wrong partner.

(hope these are part of the answered prayers)


A 'poor' guy can have those attributes as well, but the point is, to remove the worth or value of a person based on his/her present financial circumstances is short-sightedness.

Once again my lovely naijasexy, I respect your position, I only disagree with some points

Lol, I love the way you keep apologising after making some of your statements. Politely proud!

naijasexy: You know, that would be a difficult one. Again, I hate to sound like an ars-e (wouldn't say this in real life) but I don't think anyone standing on a bottom rung would even approach me, much less show interest in making me his wife. That's just the way life is. However, if such a person (from an extremely impoverished background) for some reason is interested in me, honestly as I write this now, I don't know what I'd do but the chances that I'd end up with that person would be as high as 0.001% and that's it.

lol @ the statement in red! Really, are you fiona -shrek's wife- after the transformation! >JUST KIDDING<

But seriously, life is not that simple you know. A guy with a lot of confidence and genuine love for you might summon the courage to approach you and eventually fine a way to your heart!

naijasexy: Wait, I remember one of such occasions when I was home (Nigeria) last summer, and a guy doing some work for us (fixing our POP ceiling) told me he wanted to marry me (lol, that was bold, I must say! ). I told him in the most polite way possible, that it wouldn't be possible and he kept pestering. Well, I told my mum about the situation (just to hear what she'd say) and trust me, she was damn furious.
If the person is very nice, caring and all, but poor--> I am sorry, I would not marry such a person (Forgive me if this hurts anyone's feelings. )

I really do hope you are at the upper ladder of the 'wealth ladder' or else, someone you may like, in a rung higher than yours may just hold that condescending principle against you too.

However, I respect your choice and principle to have standards, but I dont agree with them.

afam4eva: What a braggart. You can shove ur wealth down your pipe. Anumanu.

Erm, not really necessary!


Bad day in the office?

naijasexy: I come from a well-to-do family. I don't like sounding this way, but, I wouldn't wanna go into a marriage that would make me descend the wealth ladder. I can certainly marry an "okay" guy that has great prospects, but I cannot marry from a poor home. As a matter of fact, it is forbidden in my family (sorry to say, just keeping it real )

lol,

Hypothetically, what if you find joy,comfort and happiness with someone at the bottom of the 'wealth ladder'!

Would you still take the chance of refusing that in order to find the same qualities in someone up in that ladder?

Considering that the odds would be a billion to one that you fine someone with the same qualities

It all depends on the girl's mentality!

Some people were actually raised from an 'extremely poor background' but upgraded themselves to the upper-classes of their societies, mainly because of their determinations and anti-poor mentality.

Your friend might have noticed that in her along with some other qualities and chose her. However, if she still possesses the 'poor background mentality' she will run him to the ground.

If the girl's family do not have dignity and self-respect, frictions abound in that union except your friend and his wife distant themselves and help when they can.

And who knows, the girl may very well become the financial back-bone of the family as life is full of surprises.

@ OP

I think no 4 aint that bad.

Amaka G29: The Perfectionist: This one comes off as lovable, but there's a dark side. Everything has to be absolutely perfect, and she'll stop at nothing to make it so. You'll find this helpful at first, but you'll slowly realize she's a control freak.

The Social Climber: She's not a gold digger, she's strategic. She'll date you as long as you are on her level, but she'll be willing to upgrade when someone of a higher status shows interest in her. She usually has her own money, which is why she's not a GD.

The above two are more realistic and hard to detect at the beginning of a relationship. They tend to be very hard to avoid and one might have been very deep in the relationship i.e marriage before realising the monster laying next to them.

An inevitable bloody divorce resulting from those two. (Lynette in desperate housewives comes to mind with regards to the perfectionist)

Further more, the age-long concept of identifying blackness with Evil and whitness as pure has been systematically embedded into a lot of mind knowingly and unknowingly.

Angels for instance, are usually depicted as white people in white attires covered in admonition and glory, whilst most often the devil is depicted as a evil 'black' Ogre.

Another set Images that I found in a book by Robert Dyer, was that of the a movie re-enacting the war between the British and the Zulus.
The British regiments were shown to have organised their infantry in columns and rows and smartly dressed, whilst the Zulus were shown to be all over the place, unorganised, shabbily dressed with no sense of direction or authority.

There are more examples, I'm just feeling to lazy to write and think of it.

My point is, and this is just my personal opinion, this image of purity may seem to have appealed to the black male, consciously or unconsciously. This issues are very complicated and only the individual can give the reason why he may choose a partner of a different background in favour of his own race

deols: But there's something about most African men that makes them go for the fairer ladies even when marrying within their race.

Actually, there are several factors that may induce men in general to go for fairer ladies.
I was helping someone out with her psycology and media essay about the black male body and its portrayal over the past decades, including the colonial era.

The role of the media played a big role the defining the image of black people as in-organized and brute as opposed to the white people, especially white women as pure, innocent and intelligent.

Take for example the picture below;

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/a/ab/'Destroy_this_mad_brute'_WWI_propaganda_poster_(US_version).jpg/170px-'Destroy_this_mad_brute'_WWI_propaganda_poster_(US_version).jpg

It portrays an innocent white, helpless woman at the mercy of a brute 'black' animal

Now compare the physique and mannerism depicted of the black animal to that of Lebron James below;

http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4006/4201732155_f86c996051_o.jpg

Notice the 'innocent', 'pure' image of the white lady.

kunlejazz: So, Mr/Mrs Brains, how much value have you been able to add to mankind? Like Oyedepo, how many thousands of people are u responsible for? I need to know how many professors,doctors and pastors u have employed to be sure you're d smartest man alive.

Mr/Mrs no-brains, the value I add to mankind is best known to me and the people who may see it as value. Pastor Jim Jones was also responsible for hundreds of people, yet he still led them to ruins. Bernie Maddoff was responsible to many professors and doctors, yet he still led them to ruins. Hitler was responsible to a whole country, yet he still led them to ruins.

Being responsible for 'thousands' does not exempt you from being a charlatan. At the end of the day,is he not also benefiting from the same 'thousands'?

A symbiotic relationship in which one party evidently has the greatest benefit! I repeat Oyedepo is a mereSmart man that has used a very valuable commodity, Religion, to enrich and elevate himself in a very corrupt society.

In that respect, I give him credit for his smartness. Not much difference btw Oyedepo and the average entreprenuer, only that Oyedepo deceives people and uses Christianity as the core principle in his business blueprint.

MLS12: Wen tins dont really go as planned,or ur spouse is not living upto to expectations.in ur quiet time,one could wish.I myself have wished I married my ex boyfriend because he was more of a fun 2me and looks good,dat thot crossed my mind wen my hubby was becoming too busy.everytin was just work and nutin more,buh after some few hours I was still glad I married my hubby,a very good friend of mine.

Very Honest!

But chances are, had you married your 'Fun' Ex, you probably would still feel in a similar way when he too gets busy.

Human nature I guess, but its always good to take a step back and realise why a person is an ex.

nene1: And instead of attacking women like Oluchi, think to yourself first. Remeber the question I asked that the black men here conveniently dodged: HOW MANY BLACK MEN ON THEIR LEVEL WOULD CHOOSE TO MARRY WOMEN OF THEIR DARK COMPLEXIONS? Maybe it is only white men that are chasing them. How many black men would want Oluchi if given the options of the lighter skinned type women. Many black men on their economic level have the option of many different women due to their wealth.

I'd marry anybody that shares a common interest with me and we make ourselves both happy, be it black, white, latino, chinese or even alien sef.

Most important is the couple's happiness!

not the complexion.


One more thing, a happy and stable home is the bedrock of a good community.

nene1: My thread just confirmed what I already knew. Many black folks are in denial. Yes, personal decisions do affect your community as a whole. Oh but wait, when did black men give a damn about the black community. It is no wonder why we are bottom of the barrel people.

Please do explain?

How does a personal decision to be with a certain partner affects the 'community'?

nene1: People are really downplaying the power marriage has. Why do you think many wealthy Asian, Arab and white families like to marry among their own? Marriage is where families are built and they are the foundation of any society. Blacks always share the money with others. Wealthy blacks transfer their money to nonblacks through marriage. How many black families are there that have wealth lasting through generations?

Ms Nene,

It is always nice to be fair and understand that nobody owes anybody what they do with their lives, including your so-called community.

Who the next man or woman marries should concern no-one but the couples alone.


How many black families are there that have wealth lasting through generations?

It is difficult to answer your rhetorics as no data has been compiled to jugde from. However, there are rich families in all races and marry into other races and their are those who don't. The specifics are not exclusive to a particular race alone.

You can't decide what other's do with their lives.
Let me indulge you, I can as well ask you why should you choose to marry within your race alone? Aren't we all humans?

But remember, who am I to decide which race you or other black girls should marry? Should love not be the purpose of a marriage rather than transfer of wealth or skin colour?

Miss_Ife: Maybe they think it would be easier/better with someone else, once thay reach a few years of marriage and realize it's not all fun and butterflies, The truth is, it would be more or less the same with anybody. Some of the things that are difficult in a marriage are due to marriage itself (it is not easy to share everything with one person, and all the responsibilities of marriage) or to the person herself , and not the partner (for instance, if it is a challenge for me to expose my feelings and talk to my husband about what bothers me I cannot blame it on him to "not understand me" but on myself, things would be the same with another man ).

Of course, there are some situations when a person really does marry the wrong man/woman (I'm thinking of the girls who would still marry their boyfriend after he beat them, or someone with alcohol problems etc.). But all in all, I believe marriage reveals more about ourselves than anything else, and changing partner will not change us, at some point, we have to look at ourselves and accept to change if we want to make the marriage work, not change the partner.

Very insightful.

Personally, I think the bold is one of the most challenging in relationships!