₦airaland Forum

crackhaus:
..It's when women make it seem compulsory that a boy-child must sit alongside his sister(s) in the kitchen to learn stuff, this is where I see it as overkill and not necessary...

Ahaa.. The exact line I was looking to represent without contradicting myself.
I included 'primarily' there because while it is normal to see bachelors patronize eatries, it is obscence to happen upon women who have no influence on their kitchens and environments in the orthodox African family.
The lessons are crucial for a woman-to-be, but quite excusable for the boy-child.
This is the reality.

GboyegaD:
I attended one many years ago and I never experienced students beat up their teachers.

Surely, you're out of touch with the latest now.
Students beat up their teachers at will now and it is common in these rural areas, where there is little regard for civility and education.
They have 'cult-extensions' here and use that to stamp their authority since education has put them very low in the pecking order.

I pity them, and those who still believe the rural areas are where one can find gems in abundance.

beeevan:
As long as you are in my house,you Must do chores( all chores) , reserve your manhood for who gives a heck .

Have you ever heard this quotes "Be a man"? If certainly, you understand the origin and interpretations of that quote in all ramifications, I'm afraid, you certainly give two hecks about 'manhood'.

UjSizzle:
.. we don't live in the 13th century...

So the world says but reality paints a different picture in our home country; much more similar to the world we 'verbally' left behind.

In the face of factual disposition, only a person who keeps 'wishes' and 'desires' out of his today's meaningful existence can be fit to face the nearest tomorrow.

I hear something different from people. I read something different from articles. And still, my relationship and experiences with elderly men and women sing the same old song.

Nah. I'll only commit these 'verbal' developments to memory but live today as it really is.

Lust is the first stage of Love, Q.E.D.

If she wholly assists him, it is most likely a sign of desperation.
In the man's part, it seems belittling and I wonder how he can preserve his manly pride in such scenario.
But if she helps him in some part - well, we hope in God it doesn't hunt him later. But the guy must be very hadworking before she can do this confidently.

Oga, do your thing in private jare.

Arresting a 'top gun' in Nigeria entails allowing him drive his air-conditioned jeep to the station, sporting expensive clothing and jewellery, while he waits in an air-conditioned room for the query, done in low voices and lasts a maximum of two-hours.

Does the common man get identical privilege in terms of arrest? No!!

So, spare us the announcement.

acenazt:
hmmm heaven straight. sorry the gates would be shut in his face. once way to hell

I don't know if you're talking from experience?

At El-Shadai College in Imo State, some students got into a fight after school hours.

Call were quickly made and the teachers hurried back to contain the situation. After sending everyone home, one student in particular refused to go home and challenged the teachers instead. The teachers dealt with the student.
The next day, a team of over 20 touts (led by the boy's mother) stormed the school in search of the teachers. She was paid ₦7,000 before she dismissed the boys.

I'm really disgusted that such things happen in schools in my state of origin.

And it has to be true because Obasanjo said it?

Well, it's not about who did better though, there is always room for improvement.

If only some tyrants had let GEJ rule in peace, OBJ would be in hiding by now.

I wish she was better at telling me 'things' early enough. She almost always keeps them till later. The suspense no dey cute.

Else, she is 150% El Perfecto..

carefreewannabe:
I replied that what you call African culture today is what "Western culture" was some 50-100 years ago.
..
Please tell me, how traditional gender roles are unique of "the African culture"?

Sorry, I missed that first part.

The question you asked certainly isn't a two-line question.

carefreewannabe:
What's your point?

Uneasy lies the head that wears the crown. One must make hay while the sun shines.
The same question being asked by every bride's parents when a suitor is being discussed.. "What does he do for a living?", while they size you up whenever the opportunity sets in

My father made a point of making sure I leave the 'women' things to the women.
From a very young age, I was taught to stay away from the kitchen and 'sissy' chores. He encouraged me to go struggle for it out there instead, academics and otherwise.
When I got admission into the Uni, I learnt how to cook and all that, but the lesson has been ingrained. My son will tow this path as well.
I see 'females' opposing this stance. I was never taught all these, but I can do them now without losing any bit of my formative years in the past.

carefreewannabe:
African culture or Western culture some 50-100 years ago.

I take it you see too much of movies with a western theme.
Reality, unfortunately, hasn't changed as much as our wishes have.

Cutehector4u:
The male child should indulge in domestic work like cutting wood.... Washn the carz, washing his clothes, goin to the farm...

These mentioned above are not really what qualifies as 'domestics' from my point of view.
The bolded are usually 'men thing'.
By 'domestics', I'm looking at kitchen work, scrubbing the house, mending fabrics at home, e.t.c.

I believe we are Africans and we have our culture and identity that defines our uniqueness from every other continent in the world.

Africa is a deeply patriarchal society. Men dominate the socio-economic and political machinery and organizations. Men are regarded as natural leaders who are superior and born to rule over women. Women are considered weaker vessels; extensions of men and secondary human beings. The pride of women are derived from and dependent on men.

The birth of a male child often marks an unforgettable high point in a traditional African home. He is an inheritor, a direct extension of his father; the one who is going to continue the family's legacy and takes the family's last name into the future generations. The male child grows with a clear understanding of his role in the family which includes:
1. Protection of his family as a way of protecting his pride and this is the essential core of manhood.
2. Provider for his family; immediate and extended family, whether circumstances permits him or not.
3. Consistently learning new ways and exploring the unknown in search of what they need, even if they present strong personalities already.

These duties require the boy-child to be actively looking for ways to give himself a head-start, and the father first, before any other person, has the duty to educate him on how it is being done. Unfortunately, such crucial lessons cannot be learnt frolicking about the mother's apron strings and devoting majority of his time to being 'domesticated', something he can easily pick up along the way with time from his environment, out there in the field, and of course, his partner..

This 'domestication' is essentially reserved for women, who need to play this role effectively as a partner to the 'boy-child-turned-man' while he struggles to fulfil the role his African society has dumped on him from the day he was born.

Domestic chores are important, yes, but the African setting doesn't give room for the boy-child to focus on learning those. Endowed with a far superior body strength than their female counterparts, the boy-child needs to explore the world more, and develop himself to compete effetively with other 'men-to-be' as they lift their burdens to preserve the core of their manhood; their pride.

In spite of how we may feel on this topic, this is Africa, and Africans reserve no smiles for any married male who is not capable of supporting his family effectively. He is made for much more than 'singing blues while scrubbing the floor of a kitchen'.

This is Africa.

References.
Council for secular humanism
Available:
http://www.secularhumanism.org/library/aah/igwe_9_4.htm

Dumia Magazine.
Available:
http://www.duniamagazine.com/2010/10/5-reasons-why-african-men-make-good-husbands/

Princewill1:
sorry bro! I thought u are a janja.weed.Apologies!

I accept.
We'll discuss this again after your 3-year ban.

Viewing this topic: donphilopus(m), pendy79, Princewill1(m), foxylin, peziz(f), DesChyko, QuiverBox(f), brito(f) and 2 guest(s)

Moderator, ban all these troublemakers and spectators listed above from this section for two years.
Track down the guests and ban their souls!!

Hmmm.. See vex.

If una become senators tomorrow, na die for sitting be that.

pendy79:
In which household do you see celebrate and merrymake few days after the death of a child in the family. Which father goes out to cut cake and be taking pictured for the press after losing a child not to talk of 47 or so of them in one day.

See where I wrote even if he insists on celebration should it not be a media blackout thing with just family members to pray and not a cake cutting event.

The PRESIDENT of a country is celebrating his birthday, and you want him to do that in his backyard. That is REALLY REALLY VERY EASY.

Newspapers, TV, Radio, Internet e.t.c., are awash with the news and you expect him to stay in hiding. Those sponsoring these goodwill messages, I don't think they can all be so foolish not to remember the dead.

Even I didn't remember this today till you mentioned it. I was busy at work, and actually thought about hanging out with guys later today, but I definitely haven't even committed the dead kids to mind for over three days or so, now.

One thing with leadership is you can't please everyone, so you may cut him some slack today.

Uneasy lies the head that wears the crown.

gede7744:
whether am a Virgin or not is non of ur business
so focus on d issue at hand.

#Choi.. #Beef.. 1-0

MsAnne:
Dis story is damn fake

I can assure you it is quite real.
That I.D. was just created today. Someone is trying to get information and remain anonymous.

I'm confident that after today, or soon enough, it will become dormant.

englishmart:
we can still do better

Yeah.. There is room for improvement even at the pinnacle.

I remember we used to rank behind Bangladesh some time ago.

Edited: You need a lady who 'acts' decent.

If you're still shy about it, maybe you just want it, but you definitely don't 'need' it yet,

When it's time, you'll take drastic steps to ensure it happens. Chilling in the comfort of your abode and advertising for free agents isn't exactly a drastic measure.

Every blessed day, you're cursing a man who is the president of the country that birthed you.
Even on this day, you're insulting someone's father, who is celebrating the day his mother's nine months burden came to an end amid gut-wrenching birth pangs, giving rise to his existence.

If, like your post would suggest, you think this day should not be celebrated, why not challenge God who made all things possible?

Play God and call this day 57 years ago a mistake.

I love my fatherland.

By attempting abortion, you are risking incuring God's wrath and drug abuse, definitely.
I'll advice you to see this pregnancy through. But if you insist on evacuating the foetus, you can visit a patent medical dealer for proper instructions.

Meanwhile ignore whomever insults you or criticizes you negatively. Most of them are as guilty, but of something worse.

I think you're brave to go public with this although.

That was expected, ethical or not.

The bad part is just that all these hate and rivalry is laying the foundation for bad blood in next year's change in government.

Let's hope we survive this play of giants.

The seal is tired of 'egusi' soup.

Long live the President of the Federal Republic of Nigeria..

I hope to become like you someday.. Cheers!!