RichGal:
Hello everyone

Long post alert.

I feel like I'm burning out. I have been married to a guy I think I'm crazy in love with for 6 years plus. We got 2 kids.

I have been solely responsible for the bills, I mean every single bill. From houserent, to school fees, to car maintenance, to feeding and toiletries.

I have been very patient with my husband cos I'm not a materialistic woman. I really don't attach much value to money, it's just a tool to achieve required stuff.

Here's the issue. My husband is an unambitious person with no personal goals.
When we were dating, I always pushed him to achieve more and I felt since I was the ambitious one, I could always motivate him, so long as he was willing to be motivated.

But now, after all these years and two kids, I AM TIRED.

My ATM card is mostly with him, all he knows to do is spend, spend, spend while I work, work, work,plan,plan,plan and save, save, save.

I feel he has no understanding of responsibility and he has become so comfortable with me wearing these shoes.

I always have to push my personal needs aside and think of the family first.

Now I'm at a point where I'm just waiting for the kids to be grown and then I'll leave him. I don't even know sef. I feel emotionally neglected. I feel resentful. I feel all these things cos I can't walk out of this marriage cos of my Christian beliefs, my children, and maybe cos a part of me still loves him.

But, I feel myself growing apart from him daily. Sometimes, I feel I would have done way better if I wasn't married to him. I feel burdened.

If I could have an affair to maintain some form of mental stability I would, but I can't. I think he knows this so he feels confident that I ain't going no where but I'll shock him.

I'm just tired of taking care of everyone without being taken care of. I keep pouring out and giving

We look like the picture perfect couple. We are both very attractive, young looking and have great chemistry but that's all there is to it.

I can't even remember the last time we both had a meaningful conversation on an intellectual level cos while I'm all about self development, dude is all about whatever he is all about.

I really don't know. I'm really sad and getting to my threshold.

Can I have your attention ?

bayelsa1son:
I will never marry from a Yoruba tribe those people are deceitful, envious, pretentious, and proud. They will just jam two people heads together and be acting peacekeeping at the same time, run from those people infact, if you marry a Yoruba woman she will gossip u with her tribe people nonsense people

My brother

Putin has done well in managing his country inspite of the current sanctions. Him try. Successfully held the entire world and western nations by the balls without flinching

Why don't you do POS business instead of sewing ? as POS is something you can easily drop and not as tedious as sewing. Or okrika. Buy cheap bail and then resell. Abi, I like my sister RiyadhGoddess

Nigerians and sexual obsession

Gamesmart:


Is that your stuuupid excuse for when you were asked for your views to discuss, you started boasting about how much you make?

im very busy.

i agree

Gamesmart:


Simp, run. Did you think it made sense to ask you for your views to discuss and you started boasting about how much you make?

https://www.nairaland.com/7047493/why-there-many-single-guys/17#111499397

Dude, i'm busy

Hunger bad. The only way to escape poverty thesedays now na Governorship. Eeeyah

You broke tins think every one online is as idle as you. You started this 8am today, you're at it 6pm today. What a wonderful way to waste existence.

Back to my work. Continue wasting your time

Girlnextdoor1:
I adhered to your advice.


Then I got two people from here who for reasons known to them knew they had issues with my tribe but still reached out just so they could rub it in my face . Hence the motivation for the thread.


And I don't see where I was fighting . And FYI this had nothing to do with any past. I just thought it will be a good idea to bring the awareness out. That there are people who will not not marry from a tribe no matter what.

Yes I have a past which I have gotten over , there is no need for you to use it as your punch line to rebuke me.Thanks.

I did not use your past against you lovely one. I simply spoke the truth in front of me. Jump on facebook, instagram, numerous dating sites, splash your profiles everywhere, meet people.

I'm also been turned down cause of my tribe inspite of meeting all other criterion. Life is life.

Girlnextdoor1:
I'm not jor.

I told you yesterday to go create numerous dating profiles online. Rather than doing what will yield results. Chat up brothers who asked you to contact them, you're here trying to fight what you can't change. What's the benefit of this thread? Solve your past trauma? Focus on the positives. Leave all this thing

Girlnextdoor1:
Not a matter of trust but facts.

Why are you acting combative. ?

lol

Girlnextdoor1:
for a country where nepotism, tribalism and bigotry thrives some times it is about the tribe.

Trust me

Girlnextdoor1:
So like I said in another thread ,I was served breakfast because of my tribe and I have also received PMs only to rub their perceptions about my tribe in my face .

So I want to ask, what tribe would you rather be dead than to marry from such a tribe?

It is not about tribe babe, but about some strategies in loving. Keep anything you feel would be a turnoff at he start, let the emotions and feelings grow, when the other party sees you differently, the tribe won't matter even if you're from hell. Keep touchy things at the start, private

Bola146:
sir, what do you want people to say? Pamper her and let it go? Or you should keep quiet? and this one will call himself a husband or a man Seriously, to be a husband is not moimoi and pap. Some couples still need more orientation about marriage.

lol. Your friend is the reflection of your life

Gamesmart:


Simp, what are the "weird ideologies"?

Lay it out, lets discuss it then. Don't say such just to Simp up.

We have seen how good you are at Simping; lets see your balls in making great arguments.

Oya, go ahead!

I work online. If you only know the figures I rake daily. All these is just stress relieve mechanisms for me. Continue wasting your time thinking you can trigger me. You'll do that till eternity and won't get a triggered-response. Who be your mate?

apatheticme:


Not to worry, the universe takes care of itself!!

These small boys will only push weird ideas to influence the gullible and fake men. They don't fool me, they're just sub-intelligent.

Many of them actually suffered mild CP either in-utero, intra-partum (prolonged obstructed labor with fetal distress) or post-partum!

So, brain volume is low, with microcephaly, grey matter is minimal and they can only be fixated on one thing: women hating!

They will gladly accept and succumb to any worthless opinion no matter how bad, as long as the person holding the opinion has a penis! But once it's a woman,they are mad already. They've been brainwashed that a woman is not capable of sense. Meanwhile, evolutionarily, females have more brain volume than males (read up the gender neuroscience) and female pregnancies are less likely to be eventful!

Most sensible men do not discriminate based on gender and will always be able to make their choices regardless of social media supposed"wokeness" and trending ideologies,even at the expense of being labelled Simps!

Afterall, everyone will not lose themselves in the crowd,some men are able to stand out from the crowd even in the face of being mocked! That's wisdom, because the people mocking you,are the fools now, they're going to realize their folly when they eventually grow up (if they ever will).

Oh, na this doctor be this. Now, i remember who i'm talking with/to


@ the people mocking you,are the fools now, they're going to realize their folly when they eventually grow up (if they ever will).

We all should not need external validation from 15-18 years of age. I hope all gets okay with the generation coming behind. Like you said, the universe may take care of them...

apatheticme:


Let the person that "put" me in the home complain,not you the logical one! Why are you hyperventilating on top another person's issues.

Afterall, you shouldn't be taking panadol for another person's headache now, abi?

You think everyone wants to marry a brainless bimbo that can't engage in meaningful conversations on any subject of discourse?? You think everyone is a bimbo that can only fix lash,wear fake wigs and look up to you for money??

Why you dey vex?? Why are you bothered about what I do in my home?? Face your own homelessness and leave my own home alone!

Confused hypocrite, just jealous and angry that someone has a home while you are homeless, mumu!!

Now, my fear is this. That often tines some weird ideologies pushed online gets into the heads of people in marriage and such narratives veins to form contrary ideas to values that hold such relationships.

danijesus:
Just like what happened during the end SARS protest there is going to be a massive revolution against the Government of the day...anger,frustration is already building up.

If you see the blood fights I separated yesterday cause of anger in the land. My short got ruined with blood spills. I had to return home with just singlets

Gamesmart:


You missed the point again!

It is not about what is forced by life to happen. The point was about what is sought and planned to happen.



Sorry I am going to be blunt!

This is a typical illogical way a woman argues against a point she does not like or want to accept. She switches to using the exception, minority or self to make a general rule.

For example, tell a woman that: Women tend to lose their looks as they age and cannot easily attract a desirable, high-earning man by the time they are 50+ years old.

Typical women's response: That is a lie. Look at Jennifer Lopez! She is still pulling men in her 50s.

As for the claim that "Marriage ain't a goal for me", I suspect that is just another case of a typical illogical way a woman argue against a point she does not like or want to accept: Just lie outrightly to win the point!

Lets go back to that essential thing called FACTS: Women around the world, and especially Nigeria, generally want to marry. It is their goal and what they look forward to.

Cut the nonsense about "you". I am sure you are lying. Even if you are not, it is not good point. Stick to facts!



Una see?

The same woman who said "Marriage ain't a goal for me" would be the same one who gets angry when men don't want to marry or condemn the institution of marriage. That is when you know she just lied outrightly to desperately win the point.

If the facts and logic is too strong for women and does not favour their, they tend to try and make the argument become senseless or derail it.



Marriage is a useless institution for the modern day man. The downsides outweigh the benefits to gain from it.



Don't worry how they take the decision of what they want in their lives.

Don't get angry about their decision.

Simp DoctorOlasDesk, you are free to back her up here. You will get your pat on the head, boy.

Myself and Ub-unja promoted the red pill philosophy before you ever knew what it meant. On this forum and it wasn't about hating. When you grow older, you'll understand..

Nice

ModestGal:
Just wondering why ppl behave this way, I am naturally a very nice, humble, and caring person, not trying to brag, but that's the truth. But my default setting is bullshit once I'm yet to accept people. Na games I go just dey use people play. Can't remember when I started this though,, but I guess it was my way of coping with people trying to come close, I usually get lots of people trying to come close as friends,and since I'm an introvert, they would think I hate them or I suck, so turning it to a game makes me able to talk to lots of people and not get them offended.

So ass I said, takes a while for me to trust, and accept people, but when I do, I usually want to return love/ care in doubles and tripples.I go wan treat people like Angels, Queens and Kings, Even me sef no say, my friends are the luckiest if for say I rich but ontop say I broke,wetin man go do. But I still want dey do small small sha
But this is where the problem comes, once I start to been dey nice, I don't know if I'm being too nice ni o, I don't understand, ppl will start feeling themselves,and be behaving in a funny way, and as per say, I'm very egoistic, even though say,I'm broke, I value myself alot, because I believe that once I'm still alive, I can still be anything big, and thus my self esteem is on the roof. So as them begin to dey act funny, my default settings go dey knock

But now that I'm trying to become a better person, I don dey learn to dey pretend alot, and makes things a lil better. But can't stop thinking why people behave like that, because I don't, and almost 80% of people do that to me. Maybe I'm thee problem,who knows

Behave how ?

SilentFox312:
Hello

Hit me up on whatsapp

Blunttruth:

It's Igbos that do this. No offense to the Igbos.
All you guys shouting girls are not faithful, do you see why girls keep more than one guy.

Anyway my advice for you is to learn from your mistakes. Don't date for too long. No time for boyfriend and girlfriend.

Na true o @ do you see why girls keep more than one guy

Iyaebe:
If one door closes another one opens,dust yourself up and give it a try again but this time around make sure it’s alter bound.Dont be in a headless relationship for more than six months

True. A woman's time is limited. Six months is adequate to know where a relationship is headed. You get sense


I see fulls saying they are dating for ten decades and I wander if e never turn marriage already

Gamesmart:


You missed the point again!

It is not about what is forced by life to happen. The point was about what is sought and planned to happen.



Sorry I am going to be blunt!

This is a typical illogical way a woman argues against a point she does not like or want to accept. She switches to using the exception, minority or self to make a general rule.

For example, tell a woman that: Women tend to lose their looks as they age and cannot easily attract a desirable, high-earning man by the time they are 50+ years old.

Typical women's response: That is a lie. Look at Jennifer Lopez! She is still pulling men in her 50s.

As for the claim that "Marriage ain't a goal for me", I suspect that is just another case of a typical illogical way a woman argue against a point she does not like or want to accept: Just lie outrightly to win the point!



Una see?

The same woman who said "Marriage ain't a goal for me" would be the same one who gets angry when men don't want to marry or condemn the institution of marriage. That is when you know she just lied outrightly to win the point.



Marriage is a useless institution for the modern day man.



Don't worry how they take the decision of what they want in their live.

Don't get angry about their decision.

Simp DoctorOlasDesk, you are free to back her up here. You will get your pat on the head, boy.

I've brought together and i've been actively involved in atleast 7 - 10 marriages

Go and sit down. Kid

No drones?