₦airaland Forum

SammyT95:
abeg guys what time is it

reply if u know please

[size=14pt]Time is 2am. I'm set for #DebateNight as Trump & Hillary go head to head. If only someone hadn't run away from Nigeria's election debate last year, we would've known how empty & retrogressive his policies are.[/size]

[size=14pt]I'm set for #DebateNight as Trump & Hillary go head to head. If only someone hadn't run away from Nigeria's election debate last year, we would've known how empty & retrogressive his policies are.[/size]

The Nigerian way!

This guy is a demented psychopath. His character needs serious researching. Dangerous, charismatic and funny! Last ten minutes was more of a standup comedy show.

[size=18pt]Shade of life![/size]

A recession rice is a delicious meal that is served to different countries based on their economic decision. A lot of countries go through recession for various reasons- but it is always because of bad economic decisions. The US had a taste of it in 2008 after the financial sector cooked a recession and served it to the country.

For those of you who enjoy cooking, and love to make delicious meals, especially if you're of the Fulani descent; here is how to cook a recession rice:

1. Boil water - Spend 6 months delay in appointing your ministers who you will later call incompetent, but also thereby stalling economic activity and investor confidence in your country. If you do not know, that was the point at which Nigeria began to loose FDI (foreign direct investment) and reduction in naira value since most foreign companies began to repatriate their funds in 2015 due to uncertainty. Commercial activities stalled with all ministries since there were no officials to give approvals. Most foreign companies did not know where they stood with the Nigerian government.

2. Add four cups of rice - Enforce a TSA account system (single treasury account) to create a very bureaucratic and stressful process of access to funds by people and institutions within the country. That was the point at which everybody across the entire country began to complain that there was no money in circulation- dollar price further went up.

3. Add salt - enact unfavourable foreign exchange policy by shutting down access to dollar by BDCs (bureau de change) and from people who need. It. No dollar for businesses to do business. Price of dollar then skyrocketed on the black market. Courtesy our beloved Fulani cook.

4. Add curry - Pursue looted funds while not keeping an eye on the fact that the previous policies stated above will grossly devalue the funds you already have. All the while ensure that your party members are not target of this pursuit of funds. Make sure that you obtain the funds at all costs.

5. Add spices, thyme, carrot etc – remove government regulation of foreign exchange so that the dollar can go into a free fall; also remember to supply dollar at subsidized rate for only religious reasons, especially your religion and not that of others.

6. Check if there is still water at the bottom of the pot - In the midst of all the above, remove subsidy regulation of crude oil prices in the country thereby increasing the average cost of living and consumer prices index of all products in the country and making life harder for the common man until they start committing suicide or massively seeking visa to exit the country.

7. Season to taste - Aggravate the Niger Delta thereby causing not only a drop in crude oil price but in production itself. And instead of negotiations, spend almost a billion naira importing Saudi forces to battle people who live in the creeks where the oil is.

Once you can do all of this, against the backdrop of a fall in oil prices on the international market, you would have cooked the perfection recession rice. Sorry it is only fried rice I know how to cook, I would have done Jollof.

You can drink down this bitter meal with a glass of ‘blame’ by constantly pointing fingers to the previous administration for anything that goes wrong in your administration.

Enjoy your meal.

The HeraldNG

[size=18pt]Agents of darkness![/size]

https://cdn.makeagif.com/media/3-15-2015/7XJFp9.gif

[size=18pt]But I bring to you FRESH AIR.[/size]

[size=18pt]Agents of darkness![/size]

https://cdn.makeagif.com/media/3-15-2015/7XJFp9.gif

[size=18pt]But I bring to you FRESH AIR.[/size]

So they have been writing speeches without anti-plagiarism checks? Jesuuuuuuu!
Let it be known that the software is free. Copyscape is the best and free before someone quotes N200m for that project.

Relaxing at the popular Suya Spot in Maryland, Lagos. Engaging with a bottle of Legend Extra Stout and a plate of suya as I wait for Chelsea vs Liverpool kickoff.

[size=14pt]Indomie generation will not understand the terrorizing outcome of this relationship below[/size]
[size=14pt]Enema Pump + Vaseline + Nchu-anwu + Warm water[/size]

Hardetayour:
Are you still in this business. If you aren't, kindly link me up with someone, I need the services urgently

Shirts or school uniform?

DELETED

I Thank God and the vigilante for his rescue. However, there is more to the story!










PS:
RoyalRoyI have been wrongly banned for a thread I created few hours ago. Kindly review the ban and right the wrong. Thank you.

nathandrake:
are u this stupid?

Thank God you know govt use tactics like that but it is not every time and every news that comes out that is a means of distraction.

so they decided to sign the MoU today because NBS released is second quarter report?

sometimes you need to think before you talk.

i dont understand what is wrong with kids of this days

Fu*k off grand pa.

This is an attempt to distract us from the negative statistics on job loss. Many "image dry cleaning" news has been making it's way to the frontpage since that 4 millions statistics dropped. We know their antics!

I knew this will make frontpage.

Ewooooo!!!! God help us.

Run for your dear life!

pcguru1:
Every where dude apply to Interswitch/ GTBank or Ndani or even Verdan Zeal, if you can send a portfolio for us to see it would be easy, my two Bros work with an ad agency and creative agency

Dude is yet to discover his worth. His type is hot cake in my industry (Media and Advertising) to help create interactive motion ads.

y4code:
I'm a motion graphics professional I don't where to work to but was thinking of working in media or music industry I'm scared if they will accept me or not please can anyone point where I can work as a motion graphics professional

You're a BIG boy but you don't know yet. Your type is most sought-after in the Media (Digital) and Advertising industry to help create interactive ads. I know what I'm saying cuz I'm in the media industry.

That most possibly is TIV in Benue state. They don't joke with pig.

I served there.

Ndee veee! Ndee nina?

Kwase dido

[size=14pt]I had earlier put on hold all tailoring activities to face my real career as a Digital Media Planner|Buyer. I had told many who contacted me that I'm no longer in the tailoring business. To say they were disappointed would be an understatement. However, due to many pleas, I have once again gave it a rethink. Let me use my skills to help people (Best Aba tailors and Clients).

We are introducing school uniforms into the chain of designs.[/size]

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[size=18pt]PRICE LIST:[/size]

PE (m/f) = NGN800 (top/shorts)
Shirts and Shorts = NGN1,000 (top/shorts)
Jacket = NGN1,400 (up/down)

sweeteasy:
Hello OP, do you sew t-shirts? if you don't any contacts??

bolish:
Hello, am also interested in this detail. Any useful detail will be appreciated. Thanks

YES. We do.

PaulIdu:
So if an external Army attacks Nigeria now we will tell them to wait and come back during dry season because we no de fight during rainy season

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Here is what a Facebook user posted some 6 hours ago.

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It is happening now in Ngwa Road and Obohia Road in Aba, Abia State; police Vs Keke drivers.... The keke drivers said they are tired of giving #50 to the police at every junction. Welcome to Aba, where people are striving to survive but the authorities/governments are demoralizing them day after day.

For Pictures or Adonbilivit Crew:
https://s9.postimg.org/9glo6w7bj/Keke_protest_in_aba_henrikachi.jpg

https://s9.postimg.org/4vzhrynm7/Keke_protest_in_aba_henrikachi2.jpg

https://s9.postimg.org/c1r8uewpb/Keke_protest_in_aba_henrikachi3.jpg

https://s9.postimg.org/7srkpczrj/Keke_protest_in_aba_henrikachi4.jpg

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Why will the police be contributing to people's suffering. They are already crying about the poor condition of Aba roads which destroy these vehicles and hinder them from money.


[size=2pt]Mynd44 lalasticlala seun[/size]

Izonpikin:
to secede don hard you abi??...

My brother, with this kain beauty mesef dey rethink dis my pipul secession campaign. If no be say dia men na *****.

Good one guys.