₦airaland Forum

my baby girl, u are back

i dey surprised ooo, when did Nigerian prison begin to have internet facilities

pls stud dont start, u knw we've been padi for a long time now

Questing Without Worry

King Arthur was preparing to go out on an expedition and would be away from Camelot for an indefinite period of time.

King Arthur was worried about leaving Queen Guinevere alone with all those Knights of the Round Table. So he went to Merlin for some advice.

After explaining his predicament to Merlin, the wizard looked thoughtful, and said that he'd see if he could come up with something, and asked him to come back in a week.

A week later, King Arthur was back in Merlin's laboratory where the good wizard was showing him his latest invention. It was a chastity belt, except that it had a rather large hole in the most obvious place. "This is no good, Merlin!" the king exclaimed, "Look at this opening. How is this supposed to protect m'lady, the Queen?"

"Ah, sire, just observe." said Merlin as he searched his cluttered work bench until he found what he was looking for. He then selected his most worn-out wand, one that he was going to discard anyway. He then inserted it in the gaping aperture of the chastity belt whereupon a small guillotine blade came down and cut it neatly in two.

"Merlin, you are a genius!" said the greatful monarch, "Now I can leave, knowing that my Queen is fully protected."

After putting Guinevere in the device, King Arthur then set out upon his Quest. Several years passed until he returned to Camelot.

Immediately he assembled all his knights in the courtyard and had them drop their trousers for an informal 'short arm' inspection. Sure enough! Each and every one of them was either amputated or damaged in some way. All of them except Sir Galahad.

"Sir Galahad," exclaimed King Arthur, "The one and only true knight! Only you among all the nobles have been true to me. What is it in my power to grant you? Name it and it is yours!"

But Sir Galahad was speechless.

please guys, i beg u, be economically wise incase if ur gf dumps u ooo


At a jewelry store, a young man bought an expensive locket as a present for his girlfriend.

"Don't you want her name engraved upon it?" asked the jeweler.

The young man thought for a moment, and then, ever the pragmatic, steadfastly replied,

"No, just engrave it: To My One And Only Love. That way, if we break up and she throws it back to me in anger, I can use it again."

If you think ur a failure, pls u are not cos dis guy's case is worse


After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with his blind date. Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave if something like this happened.

When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died."

"Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!"

The best way to get back at an ungrateful girl

Two high school sweethearts who went out together for four years in high school were both virgins; they enjoyed losing their virginity with each other in 10th grade. When they graduated, they wanted to both go to the same college but the girl was accepted to a college on the east coast, and the guy went to the west coast.

They agreed to be faithful to each other and spend anytime they could together. As time went on, the guy would call the girl and she would never be home, and when he wrote, she would take weeks to return the letters. Even when he emailed her, she took days to return his messages. Finally, she confessed to him she wanted to date around. He didn't take this very well and increased his calls, letters, and emails trying to win back her love.

Because she became annoyed, and now had a new boyfriend, she wanted to get him off her back. So, what she did is this: she took a Polaroid picture of her sucking her new boyfriend's unmentionables and sent it to her old boyfriend with a note reading, "I found a new boyfriend, leave me alone."

Well, needless to say, this guy was heartbroken but, even more so, was pissed. So, what he did next was awesome. He wrote on the back of the photo the following, "Dear Mom and Dad, having a great time at college, please send more money!" and mailed the picture to her parents.

shut up jor, man dey even try make up with u and d same time na break u dey break am,

*shaking head he says "dis is not d stud i used to know"

nice one man, i love it

which one be dat one, no use style pour wahala for my head ooo, u self knw who u dey call coconut

Studio CFR:
Gud boy - na those two coconut heads remain

coconut head? are u talking of vicks and efe? wat did they do

dat one na last thing, but u suppose knw say if ur actions are making some people not happy, u just av to shift and adjust to wat goes, so am apologizing

why i go wan spoil jokes section, ok if na soo una see am, make una no vex jor , are we cool now?

d love still dey shack us cos we be new couple na, u suppose understand

no mind us jor, na honeymoon we dey do dat time

hey stud, how far, how ur night

[quote author=Efemena_xy link=topic=498991.msg6717111#msg6717111 date=1283901737]babes - I nor fit decode any of your yarns

break am down pls. . .[/quote]u suppose know my idowu naa, hey own kind yarn no be small small one, na gbamgbam she dey pour am like grinding machine

nice one, i love it

[quote author=Efemena_xy link=topic=510027.msg6717143#msg6717143 date=1283902164]@Element, you've got a really nice collection of jokes

but you need to give a 'lil at a time - at least to give peeps the chance to comment

too many at once - and you kinda loose interest. . . [/quote]hmm dats true, wise words from efe

oh u sure bet he will, stud has been crazy even before he left for like 3 days

Studio CFR:
She no only dey answer me, she dey trip for me

idowu, pls give dis guy his reply, am tired of him making me feel annoyed at u cos i aint seeing those kind of statements

Studio CFR:
Orie so'sinu

Elenu gbeske - omo'ita

idowu, u still dey answer dis guy, stud don kolo finish honestly

and by d way my sweetheart no be omo ita, y jealousy dey chop ur brain like dis

ok i don hear u my darling, make we reduce am small , i will pass d news to efe and vicks too

Studio CFR:
Yeah - a di*kless one.
No wonder your babe dey chase me about

, stud if na joke stop am i no like am

my idowu, how are u jor, i can smell d food from my table here, tell me, wat is for tonight

Idowuogbo:
okokomaiko
my husband get anoda talent besides bin a Nackson
To God b d glory

u suppose knw d kind husby wey u get now?

i love it man, nice one

make i no lie i miss u oo, sometimes if u no just dey, Nland go just dey boring, forget d fact say our two fit fight till we slaughter each other, i still respect ya

soo stud, wetin happen wey be say u no dey Nland for like 3days, u travel?

abeg free me jor

[quote author=baby.me link=topic=505023.msg6714024#msg6714024 date=1283866993]Stop derailing this thread [/quote]am soo sorry jor , u cant understand wats going on between me and dat pig , anyway am out of here

ENVY U? chai, people get sense pass dat one for Nland naa u no even happy say dem dey pity u dey tell u say ur swagga boring