₦airaland Forum

Gerrard59:
Sometimes, I understand why many ladies stay off Nairaland and the feminist ideology of many educated Nigerian women. Staying alone shows independence as an adult, and we've men scream daily for their wives-to-be to be independent, aka don't be liabilities. Then all of a sudden, the women shouldn't use expensive phones and live alone even if they have no one in the state/city they work.

The thing with social media be say it has people from all walks of life who comment based on their outlook, which most times, are extremely limited in the grand scheme of things. One up there, a Keke driver (no offense to them) is wooing a lady based on what he has seen about her in the spirit realm. He doesn't even know if the lady is economically better than him.

Thanks for saying the obvious. They say don't marry a liability: she's independent and now irresponsible. I think some are just confused or lack high value women in their family.

folake4u:
My story. Except the bolded part.

Awwwnn...lolz....you'll definitely have yours soon jare.

They'll be fine.

blesdman:
Continue. Time will validate or invalidate ur opinion

If your sister or female mentee asked for your advice of a lucrative opportunity that takes her to another state where she has no family, kindly state what your advice will be.

Geofavor:
Girlfriend, not wife.

Wife and not girlfriend.

The wedding I attended on Saturday, the chief bridesmaid who's married has tattoos, fixed nails and lashes and was smoking during the reception at the full glare of her husband who was also groomsman and they were doing PDA at every slight opportunity.

My former BM who's husband is a SAN, does some of the things the guy stated and she's over 45 but her hubby likes it.

You people shouldn't speak for men who choose to have their fantasy in their wives.

dkidd:
Yeah and I never said anything bad about ur sister but mentioned the most possible intentions of guys in ur DM seeking a chance with her

I hope you didn't take offense and if you did, I apologize.

dkidd:
Good for her. So wetin come concern my sisters here na

The reason for that statement is that most guys pass comments here without speaking as though they have sisters that look up to them or mothers who were daring in their prime.

dkidd:
I agree. Staying alone should not be a problem if she can't help it and it's a better option but then having 300 Spartans in ur DM seeking a linkup with ur sis doesn't mean they want to wife her. They might just be all thirsty

I never said 300 o. I'm not even socially inclined to say the least but she's in a serious relationship that is altar bound.

You guys talk as if you don't have sisters.

Talismann:
listen and be wise, 24 is a perfect age to get married. Ask around. 20 to 24 is the perfect range. Be informed.

Now while I am not implying your sister na OS, you need to understand that a young, unmarried lady living alone (in Nigeria) is bad optics and sends a wrong message to potential suitors regardless how you choose to sugarcoat it.


There's a reason females look for female roommates if they can't help but get their own space.

Many years back we stayed in a compound with an unmarried, young pretty lady (22y) who was on her own. Omo we no know say she be landlord side chick and the landlord wasn't even staying in the compound with his tenants.


Na landlord wife come one early morning come expose her and na church girl. No be small wahala that day.

Be guided.

Don't use your neighbor to generalize everyone.

I'm currently doing a training with a bank and most of my female colleagues are single, responsible and well to do in their own way and live alone. Guess what, some are in serious relationships.

Someone relocated from ABJ to LOS where she has no family for a better offer, you'll tell her to leave the offer because she'll have to rent and live alone and will never find a man. Babes we get cars and are independent.....I laugh in Spanish.

Funny enough my sister is in a serious relationship wey the family sabi the guy and he helped her select the apartment while she paid herself.

You guys talk as if you don't have sisters with career aspirations and big dreams that if staying alone will help them SCALE, why not?

Abi una sisters no japa to UK or Canada alone? You'll tell her to stay back because she needs to keep th3 image of a responsible lady to land a man at the expense of her growth and self-development.

pocohantas:
I don't get the hype with virgin houses as they call it. Tiny windows, no cross-ventilation, tiny stairs, no greenery, no store, no dining area, no balcony, you have to put gas cylinder inside your kitchen. In the past balcony served as play area for us. We dey play better ball and badminton for balcony . Neighbour downstairs go dey shout because of the thumping of our feet.

These days your child won't even see space to crawl! You can't buy walker for your child because once you put 5seater chair and TV console, house done full!

Everybody carries food into the room to eat while pressing phone and watching amebo on blogs. No parking space. People park on the street and their brain box disappears by morning. Yet landlords have mind to ask for 1.5m for mini-flat.

Left to me, my first choice for rentage is an old house. Except I see a new house whose landlord has conscience.

I tell people if it's not an old house, I'm not renting. I'm surprised that there are still some of us that aren't crazy about pop and modern windows that restrict airflow.

There's a house on my street currently in development phase. I looked at the windows and the room has one slender long opening that's like half of the traditional single slide window and I said to myself, someone will pay for it under the guise of new house.....in this climate change with heat especially if they can't ensure 24 hours power in the apartment.

May God comfort the family he left behind.

Talismann:
and na why that your younger sister never still marry yet.

You seem to think you know her so well to vouch a 100% for her

At 24, wetin she dey find for man house. Let her enjoy her youth.

If you can't vouch for your sibling, I can vouch for mine to a reasonable extent.

I want to believe that the OP doesn't mean the above.

If your daughter OP was to go abroad for her studies, and she gets an apartment of hers where she lives alone upon graduation....and a worthy man will classify her as wayward......

This also applies if she were to be in Nigeria.

My younger sister lives alone (she moved out at 23), I went with her to cover an event this weekend which is her side hustle. There's no way you can call her irresponsible if you meet her sir. I know how many guys are in my DM asking me to link them to her.

Why the subtle threat from him?

OP deserves to be canned.

Interesting

They got to Imo, where's the car? Have they tracked their phones....

Trump will come on TruthSocial to vent.

benefitzte:
How many night guards or OPC do you think a street can engage to face more than a hundred thieves?
In 1999 or there about in Ajegunle then, we the residents use to volunteer two persons/night from each compound for night watch.
I think we succeeded then because that area was predominantly SS and SE residents.
The street even had an Ibo name and it happened to be the longest in Ajegunle.

100 thieves at once, I want to believe they were many but not up to 100.

They can use both OPC and youth per apartment in the street on rotation basis.

Curfew with law agencies for enforcement will go a long way.

Why can't the street associations employ vigilante or use OPC?

The baale/oba should impose a curfew from dusk to dawn.....

Mushin isn't for English speaking like you're doing here.

Why can't each street mobilize boys to guard the area?

Why did they start talking in 2016 for a contract that was signed in 2006?

Na dem sabi.

Let's see what Hadiza has to say.

APOPTOSIS:
My Humble Advice:

Get a well charged Recording device, go with it.
Activate it and leave it in one of the couches there, when everyone is seated and excuse yourself to use their restroom in the midst of your conversation with them.
Get into the restroom and spend at least 30 mins.
Come out and deactivate your device quietly.
Go home and replay it and truly know what they think of you.
Come back and thank me on this forum.

.
Na wa o.

Did you do this in your time sir?

Ibechris, your advice is needed sir.

helinues:
When?

Banks don't operate there on Mondays likewise other corporate organizations.

helinues:
Toh

What started as a genuine struggle but was hijacked by the politicians by donating in rerouting the struggle for SEDC.

Now that SEDC have been approved, no more sit at home as mission accomplished .

Jubril left ears and nose was just something deliberate just to shift the attention of the people.

There's still sit at home in the east.

Lovemaester:
What did he do to favour the Nigerian people in the 10yrs he was at the helm of afdb. Don't just type bullshit

Why the use of the derogatory term "bullshit" to engage?

He was one of the best ministers we had in Goodluck's cabinet and he didn't disappoint when he got to AFDB.

Sarahjen:
You're right. I had conversations with my parents and asked that they trust that he had good intentions for me. Even though I should have specifically told them not to ask him for money.
I only believed him reaching out consistently without giving in to their demands after the conversations I had with them will make things better.

There's already an expectation gap by your parents which isn't realistic to an extent. It screams entitlement and they'll not allow him to enjoy the marriage as they'll put him under financial pressure.

Dtruthspeaker:
Abeg no complain. You yourself also cause pain and misery to other people. Humans are just wicked and evil.

Does it include you?

Your parents ask for monthly payments and how long is it going to continue?

Will he be doing it after the marriage too upon proving he can care for you?

You asked him to reach out to them but didn't tell your parents to review their stipend request as they're demarketing you.

This is 2025 and not 1985.

He took his money for prayers.

I don't understand....

You made money and wanted to invest and he couldn't pray for you over the phone.

Thank God justice has been served.

Why do people use ChatGPT to respond these days?