₦airaland Forum

Feign being broke for 3 months, two of them will fly away. Who tell you say they love you. I bet you, if the two no fly away, one must run away...then you continue your life with the one way no gree run, no be say you go use mouth dey talk say you don broke, be real about that, bring your trusted niggas to be buying off your properties small small, them go carry them go keep for their house D

MyProblem1:
Good day nairaland.

I am in a dilemma, and I will love your opinion about it.

I am a young man in my mid 20's, living alone in Lagos, I won't say I am well to do, but I am doing very okay for an average Nigerian bachelor of my age. Here goes my problem.

I am in a 3 years old relationship with a 22 year old lady, we have known each other for about 4 years and began dating after a year of being friends, she was very decent and respectful at first, we vibed well and we Kickstarted a relationship, we were in a no sex relationship due to her principles and for about a year, we never had sex, she was my friend and we could chat for hours and not get tired, we gave each other access to our phones, she had my finger print on hers and hers on mine, it was a beautiful relationship and I sincerely wanted to settle down with her, but I noticed she was the extremely jealous type.

a year into the relationship, she got admitted to school and that was where our problems started. Prior, she lived not very far away from me on the island, so we saw each other often, but now, she moved to the mainland which is very far away from me, to top the whole matter, I gave her money to rent a room as I didn't want her to stay in the hostel, but to my shock, she brought in her cousin sister to stay with her, it was just a Normal room, so there was no privacy, my initial idea was that I could go over to spend a few days with her instead of her coming over to my place every time, but it failed, I was against the idea of her sister staying but she pleaded and I let it go, now, she is the only one who comes to visit, and it doesn't happen often, maybe once a month or something. I was lonely and bored most times as I work from home and sometimes needed someone to just chat with.

One day, I stumbled across the number of an old female friend and we began chatting, we vibed really well and she asked me if I had a girlfriend which I denied, note that we never met with the lady, we only chat. After some days, my gf came over and as I slept, she took my phone and opened it and read my chat with that lady, I woke up in the night to see her crying, I asked her why and she showed me the chat, I apologized very much and regretted every thing, she said she forgave me and left the next morning, after she got back to her place, she sent a text saying that she is out of the relationship, I was confused, I begged her but she refused, so I let her be.

Before the whole incident, she registered as a nurse at a hospital close to her place. There was this particular patient that was ill, and she and a colleague always go over to his place to inject him, she told me he always gives them little 1-3k each time they go so she always looks forward to it, I warned her about it but she said it was nothing.

Fastforward, after the whole text message and breakup thing, I left her alone and wanted to move on with my life, that was when she came back after over a month and was trying to take me back, and because I loved her, my arms were open. We spoke about a lot of things that happened during our break and one of the things she told me was that she was raped once, and that night, I was feeling very bad and decided to call her, after I did, she picked up and said she was gonna call me back, but according to her, the rapist was attracted to the light on her phone and he came and put a knife behind her while wrapping his arms around her, and that was how she surrendered. I was devastated cos I told her never to keep late nights around school, but she said due to the breakup, she started having some type of friends and started going to night parties and she was on the way to one of the parties when it happened. I was sad for days but I forgave her, after all, it was just once and it wasn't like I was a virgin or she was.

She also told me she almost started a relationship with a man, but promised to break off anything they were about having, we made love that night and it was beautiful, it was like nothing ever happened. That night, a number gave her 16 missed calls, I was surprised as to how someone will call 16 times so I picked up the number from her phone, and installed a tracker on her phone. I am very trxg savy, so after I did, I could see virtually everything on her phone, from all texts, to whatsapp chats, Facebook, telegram, everything, even her phone conversations and live screen.

In the morning, I allowed her go and didn't talk about the number calling. About an hour after she left, I saw a text message she sent to the same number apologizing for not picking up and calling the person baby and all, she sent several messages apologizing, so I let her reach home, then I called her mum and asked her to please be calm with whatever decision I was going to make, I called my gf and asked her who the name on that phone was, she was quiet at first, I asked again and she said he was a friend, and I asked what is her relationship with him, she said it's nothing and wanted to start making trouble out of it, so I just told her I was going to send her the exact text she sent to her baby today and that is the end of us, after I did, I ended the relationship. It was a long day that day, her whole family was calling me, I also called the guy too and asked him if he knew her and he opened up, he said she was his girlfriend and they have been dating for almost 4 months now and all, he said a lot of things about her, both true and lie, I found out they had been traveling round together, she has been driving his car to school, etc, but one thing that never happened was penetrative sex, they had MouthAction tho. I wasn't willing to accept all the family's apology, her mum was basically crying on phone and begging, so I accepted but was careful with her from then.

She later told me that it was the same patient I warned her about, that he was the one she started a relationship with and she did it because i denied having a girlfriend.

After the whole incident, our relationship never remained the same, we had a lot of fights and many times, this lady will actually charge at me, I have never hit her before and I never wanted to, it was beautiful but not as it used to be.

Fastforward almost a year later, I met another lady and didn't want anything more than being just friends, I even wanted to introduce her to my gf, but along the line, we vibed very well and I decided against the idea, I found out we had a lot of things in common with this new lady, she was not the prettiest, but she was very pretty as well, her body was very curvy, she was vulptious and tall, she had the perfect size of everything and was pretty, but not as pretty as my main gf as my main gf was Caucasian, her dad is from Spain. Along the line, we started falling for each other and as it happened, her bf broke up with her just around that time, I was there for her and before we knew it, a relationship started. Due to the development, I had to password protect my phone and was more careful with it. Her bf came back begging and I thought she was going to accept but to my shock, this lady was very honest, she even blocked the guy who they have been together 2 years with. I started a relationship with her while still having my old relationship thinking when she goes back to her bf, I won't be on the loosing side, but I was wrong, she was the most honest being I have ever met. This girl gave me real peace of mind, she knew how to handle situations, she doesn't nag, she was very witty and playful, there was basically no dull moment with her, I fell helplessly for her, I knew I needed to let one go for the other but I didn't know which to pick from.


My main gf is a full time nag, she is also violent, just recently, after she found out I called a lady, she tried forcefully taking my phone but I overpowered her, she somehow took the lady's number and called her, I took the phone from her and ended the call, and she punched me in the face, making me bleed, and hit me again, so I seized her phone and she charged toward me again, I just pushed her on the bed, yet she didn't rest, she charged again, I didn't know when I gave her a dirty slap which instantly calmed her down and made her bleed. I have never hit her before despite the many confrontations, I felt bad and apologized for it. We agreed to give ourselves a break to think about everything, and I want to make it right this time but I just don't know who to go with, my gf is hardworking but a nag and violent, she also demands more, the other lady is peaceful and never nags, she is curvy and mature, she has never asked me for 1 naira, everything I gave her, I did it from my heart, willingly . I love them both, I am just confused.

Badboibipo:
I am going to share the greatest lesson you will ever learn in life, briefly.

We live in a world where everyone is acting like their lives are perfect online, and even offline everyone only shows you the best version of their lives, so by default society makes us believe everyone is doing better than us!

The problem is that is a big fat lie!!!
Most people are miserable, broke, suicidal, depressed, but will never share that version of their lives with you. You will think you’re the only one having a hard life and mistakenly start envying people you’re way better than.

Now this is the problem.

Since it seems like everyone is doing so well and you’re meant to feel left behind by society, you start living your life to please people!!
You quickly want to impress everyone and start taking minor accomplishments as real accomplishment and that’s when you get lazy and start failing in real life but to the world you’re winning!

Let me explain, you buy an iPhone 13 with your life savings of 700k and your account balance is left with 1.5million. Then you buy a used Lexus with 1.3 million and you are left with 200k, you buy expensive clothes with 100k and you’re left with 100k for food. In two weeks you come out of your house and everyone is bowing at you and calling you “odogwu” because you use an iPhone 13 for gods sake, you drive a Lexus and you’re wearing senator ironed clothes. But nobody knows you just spent you life savings to impress them. After a month, you’re struggling to eat, no business, no skill, no talent just a bunch of fake friends and a lifestyle you can’t maintain. You start selling off your phone your car and eventually you get half of the value of these items and before you know it you’re broke! Because you don’t want to be mocked, since you’re the latest big boy in town, you use half of the proceeds from selling your property to buy more designer clothes and you start using Uber to maintain the respect, and in a month you become completely broke. You start hiding and possibly become a drug addict and eventually a loser!!!!!!

The point I’m making is if you’re worth over 1 million, you don’t need to change your lifestyle to impress fake admirers, be rich and stop trying to look rich. Look for investment opportunities, keep few friends, live a simple life, wait to actually become rich before you start looking rich.

I remember vividly when I made my first 100k back in the days, when Yar'Adua was still presido. Omo na Samsung Galaxy dey reign that time. I go use 70k buy Samsung Galaxy S2 come dey form rich kid. I come go back school. Come broke..come use my last 30k dey play sure 2 odds for bet9ja to make bigger money na so that one come chop the remaining money finish. I don dey for like 2 days no food, na so I go alone comot my sim card sell the phone 30k...

All the people I don impress come dey ask me, where my phone dey, they want snap pics. I come tell them say thieves slap me for area for night collect my phone run...

Finally I go buy one second hand htc phonwe that year at 15k, come mange 15k till school vacated.

I have learnt a lot from that experience. Also I follow Philip Michael on Facebook. The guy na real guru. His talks dey blow my mind. Na him talk say:
"if you can still count your money with your two hands that you're broke, make you go hustle"

At what age did you discovered that Nigerian girls no dey hear word.

Tell them say you no like this, na that thing dem go dey do

Laggafin:
He was contesting den.. but now he has no interest and will take his pound of flesh and teach APC a lesson for not allowing him choose his successor as he openly asked from den before the primaries

Baba wanted to pick his successor APC no gree, oya na this time he will pick his brother Atiku..you don hear him condemn PDP since after APC primaries...even his cousin dey PDP now

If power returns to North blame two foolish and greedy persons. Wike and Tinubu. Atiku don promise Wike, he will give him the ticket after 8yrs. Wike don dey jump up now.

Till after 8yrs.
South South cannot produce VP for 8yrs under PDP and then produce the next president again. If Obi wins good..if Atiku wins good, he will still hand over to Obi after his tenure.

He made it clear Obi didn't informed him before he left. Had it been Obi informed him and he advised Obi not to leave and Obi refused to hear him out then know that Obi is on his own. But in this case, him and Obi still dey the same team.

samwash:
We Nigerians are just too Religious sometimes. Someone share a testimony in church how he got a job without the interviewer interviewing him because he wore an handband of the same church with the interviewer. Vola!! He got the job. Likewise some other person's been rejected because they belong to a particular church/ denomination or Religious belief.
It remains me of some yrs back when a pastor in my church was the lawyer incharge of a property Am about to rent,after getting the property, he saw me in church one day, he was surprise & ask me why didn't I tell him Am a member of the church,I just told him I wanted him to deal with me as a client not as a church member.
Getting a job is a job on its own.

Which church you dey go is always the question. Though me na staunch Mormon, I dey always tell the person, I no get church o. I no get strength to start argument, how his own church better pass my own. He go say try dey go church o. I will reply "ok sir"
dey go my way. Two people will be selling the same products, your own church member will be selling his own at a higher price, una go still dey patronise him, sake of, na una church member. No be juju be that

Patrioticbreed9:
I will demolish 200 churches!.

I will make sure that the numbers of church is the same as the number of local goverment in Nigeria, in worst case twice, that is, two church per L.G.A.

Any pastor with a calling must be registerd.

And we are going to have less than 10 church brands.

If a church must have a remote outreach that outreach must not accept offerings, if caught that outreach will be sealed and the pastors arrested and sentenced 48yrs in prison.

Jesus and his appostles preach for free.


Lets say you just want to walk and evangalise, you must not accept offerings, if not the above punishment is applicable to you.


@Patrioticbreed !

I tell you. Me sef, will reduce Churches the way Sanusi reduced banks.

Many Churches will merge. They will have 1billion naira per church in the CBN, religious reserves.

If anyone pay tithe or sow seed for church and finally no miracle, his/her condition no change, he will apply to the FG for refund, then he will be refunded from the 1 billion in his churches account in the federal reserves.

Then I will ban hook up and ashawo work, if you must Bleep go get a girlfriend or boyfriend or you use soap or you practice abstinence. If you reach 35yrs as a guy, you never marry, you will be forcefully conscripted into the Military, before you die throwaway come become useless to the nation. Same applies to women..if you reach 40 no child no husband na army you dey enter so

If you call police for somebody and finally na wrong accusation, na you find trouble and the person dey his right. The person will flog you 36 strokes of the can representing 36 states of the federation. Then the IPO will sama you 1 hot slap representing the FCT

Collecting person babe no be crime..na when you Bleep her finish you no marry her, na then the two of una will know say una don commit relationship felony 6yrs imprisonment for the guy. 3 yrs imprisonment for the lady. That's to reduce the number of exes, and forestall the indiscriminate widening of toto. Tight toto no dey Nigeria again, except for far North. Even for the far North sef, Alhaji them don monopolize all the fine fine girls. So If you must snatch person girlfriend...hmmm, make sure two of una go marry o

If you still public funds, I pity you. Na crocodile go chop you...once you're convicted, straight to Agulu lake, throw you inside the lake, crocodiles go chop you.

Once I do all these finish, l step down as president

Iron your clothes well and polish your shoes. You can take your clothes to a laundry, if you no get light for house. You can wear crocs and put your well polished shoes in a hand bag... while on the street where the firm is located, then you can branch to a store or barbing saloon and put on your shoes...that's if you're coming from a rural or trenches area, with no good roads.

Don't apply any perfume at all pls. Smell natural. I heard a girl was denied a hotel job, her body spray was exactly the same with that of the hotel manager's ex that did him shege . The man told her without mincing words: " you have spoilt my day, I hate remembering Kate" she was just muttering "sorry sir", "sorry sir" before she left

Don't wear any religious insignia, medals, chaplet etc. If you're asked your religion just mention Christianity. Which church, just name one unknown pentecostal church. If the interviewer askes you; where is it located? I have never heard of this before, just reply, it's a new church in my area" ...
Don't associate with the known ones like Winners, RCCG etc. Most of them no dey use eye see members from other churches. Like Chosen and Deeper life people are very fanatic and toxic. Maybe just say...God of Miracles fire ministries. Don't say Catholic Church, even if you're a Catholic..many pentecostal churches hate Catholic Church and Catholics, but even if the manger or those employing you are Catholics, they will still hire you as Catholics no too dey discriminate against other churches. This is Nigeria, religion plays major role in many things. No come talk say you will not hide your religion because of ordinary job. Get the job first, sapa no be your mate o


Once it's your turn to be interviewed, put your phone on silent, not flight mode pls. Check your contact numbers well on true caller, it may reveal some details about you. I used to have a number that always show Faber Bet9ja. One day one man asked me whether I am a gambler, I said no, I come grab fast fast tell him say, I don work as Bet9ja cashier before after my secondary school.

Finally, be mindful of how you use the door and the seats. Always leave the seats as you found them, after seating. Always close the door gently, don't close the door on the next person coming in after you. Your sense of courtesy and orderliness are judged from little little things

fman:
Don't call a brother man
Fool!!!!!

I can never call a brother man a fool or support a bitch over a brother man. Even my own girl dey protect other girls even when they wrong me..I will be lamenting, she will say " ah e don do na, o ya go and kill her"

Pls we should learn to support our follow men..like the bitches Dem do.

I come in peace

Ka O dikwa ka ana eme

No be the same mid 2023 una want remove fuel subsidy...


Omoh next president go get enough wahala to tackle

Highest they will win the Serie A with him. But when he lives then like it happened to Juve...
They will struggle like APC without Osinbajo

Nothing dey their head. See Xavi already tipped ad the next Guardiola. See Rudy Van Nisterol of PSV already tipped as the next Ten Haag. See Arteta warming up to Arsene Wenger
English ex players na to just dey make mouth for media chor chor chor chor dem sabi

VeryWickedMan:
Scott Parker
Gary Neville
Wayne Rooney
Paul Scholes
Phil Neville
John Terry
Tim Sherwood


Soon:
Frank Lampard
Steven Gerrard




Add him to the list of useless British ex players wey no sabi anything about ball. All they know how to do is run their mouth on TV blasting people better than them.

The man is clueless a swear. He should have locked his defense when Liverpool were 3 nil up, then play a one man striker in the front at least to forestall the goals from pilling high.

He, will then make adjustments from the next game.

ASUU + FG una don try...these ones supposed dey school now dey run around dey prepare for exams...

If you're a stranded student reading this no let idleness destroy your life. If you no get work to do, try find one learn or you channel your energy to Obi/Datti campaign.

Okay na

NaijaRoyalty:
Which other blessing again after Tinubu has put Lagos inside his pocket ?

Or you want tinubu to be president so he will put CBN in his pocket too?

Why una like to support thief like this ?

Omoh if Tinubu becomes president, he go relocate CBN to budillion, CBN go dey print naira for his house

I have never patronised Olosho all through my life...and I don't even lack pussy, how I managed to pull that still dey surprise me till date.

I have like close to 10 girls in my bleeping team, some get boyfriends, some are single mothers. I rotate them at will.

You see olosho wey dey for curtain dey find client, I have never bleeped one nor engaged in hook up

So this show still dey


Wetin dey reign now na BBObi...Big Brother Obi...

BBNaija don die, the go encounter huge losses this year . Make them just evict everyone for the house, close the show, to save running costs. The show may come to life by next year

You cannot personalize the prick of a Calabar man...
If you like call him bishop or pope. Anointing oil no fit tame Calabar man prick. The only oil Calabar man prick sabi is toto oil

EmmyDJourno:
It is in Wike’s best interest to support Peter Obi
Atiku would not regard him if he wins coz Wike has never liked him since 2019
He is not a Tinubu boy and would not bow down to that graven image
Peter Obi is the only one offering him a place of relevance on the side of history

If Atiku wins, he will do Wike shege, make it somewhere.

Atiku will ruffle his feathers. Atiku will even regard Peter Obi than Wike. Pete Obi always acknowledges Atiku as his leader. If Atiku wins, Peter Obi will be part of his government, mark it somewhere

Bad as e bad, by this time next year, Wike will be at the back seat like Peter Odili, Amaechi and co.

He should enjoy his reign while it lasts

IamAtikulate:
Wetin concern you with who PDP fields. If SW has the moral right to contest for presidency NE too.

Tinubu will lose, 100% confirmed and nobody will divide this country.

Your wailing never even start.

He calls himself Jagaban, yet he allowed Northern governors to deceived him into running with a Moslem Moslem ticket.

Shekarau was supposed to defect to APC , but strong NW leaders convinced him to move to PDP.

North don carry agabado and his slaves handicap. The North didn't betray SW, they honored their commitment by giving Tinubu the ticket

North didn't betrayed anybody o. They gave Tinubu ticket. Told PDP to micro zone to South East, Wike no gree, he kept shouting South. How can GEJ from South South finish his 6 yrs and South South wants to go again under PDP.
E no make sense. Wike no gree micro zone to South East, he trusted his dollars to defeat Atiku, Tambuwal come do him strong thing. Thank God Wike no win APC ticket, e for become straight win for Jagaban and me no ready to chop cassava.

donem:
Lolz Brother man it's not easy I tellz you. me am no saint o.. but my life is worthy of being emulated as a model, ain't hypeing here.
am like captain America, am good at saving a life lol, I can help peeps close to me to an extent of going bankrupt, so this isn't about not providing or giving to her. to cut long story short found through some source she did hookup, inspite giving her 100k less than a week to the incident, as I ended the relationship yesterday, e clear her for eye, because it was within a twinkle of an eye, and e be her like film.

my saving grace is that my profession made me kill my emotions a long time ago, else man for the somehow depressed, via marriage plans I been done make finish, I give up relationship for now, we move, all the way.

Blessed up man...no time to check time. She will come begging, but zero your mind and pursue greater heights. Me I don line up the replacement of the one I dey with now.

Her replacement dey for bench, waiting for her to bleep up, then I get her fired

APC did well, they came in 2015 and sent us back to 1983. Wasted our 8yrs...


Never again will such an evil party be allowed to torment us.


Obi or No elections in 2023

Hope Uzodimma
Yahaya Bello





Mad people everywhere

donem:
Just find this funny, I broke up just yesterday evening with my now Ex I intended getting married to, reason is= Hookup.

My confusion is that I dey give her everything she wants o. But she keeps on opening new Facebook accounts, she have five Facebook accounts...always online on all of them..then two WhatsApp and 2 Telegram. After much wahala from me she shut down 3 remaining 2..she keeps telling people she wants to enjoy this life first before marriage, meaning she wants to go taste different sizes of di*ks and guys. So I don call her papa and mama for her home town, tell them o. Any more sign of insubordination, she gats to go. I don drop last warning give them.


I am talking of a girl born 2003 my man

Very good.


Once Tinubu wins, Shettima will open Aso Rock back gate for him boys, them go kidnapp Tinubu...

Boom, he will become President and terrorists will overrun Nigeria

After Atiku's presidency, PDP will zone their ticket to South.

APC will like to return to power, they will zone theirs to North.

North will start crawling back to APC after Atiku, they will tell you what Atiku's PDP did to them etc

Op me and you go put leg for one trouser o...where are the following in your list, edit your list before me and you fight here

Rotimi Amaechi...the anointed candidate

Orji Uzor Kalu.. Lawan errand boy that year

Dave Umahi... Buhari's son for South East. He
said Buhari na him papa o

Anyim Pius Anyim, na him first buy PDP form

Ogbonanya Onu...na him be the secret Buhari candidate..

Ngige...he been dey flex muscles that time, even with ASSU strike

Yahaya Bello...this one carry his form that year go meet Buhari for Villa for endorsement

Godswill Akpabio...he dey Akwa Ibom now dey chop periwinkles and Afang soup

Kemistri4:
Some previously very popular politicians has gone into hibernation ahead of next year's election


So here's my List

1) YEMI OSINBAJO

What I loved most about this one is the sharp sharp pictures his photographer always produces. But since the primary election, very little is heard of him. Sha, he should loan that his brilliant photographer to LP, PO really need it. Their photos and videos are poor quality

2) ROCHAS OKOROCHA

This one was very outspoken as governor and senator but it seems Uzodinma has humbled him in Imo . Did he even win a return ticket to the Senate? 0 votes in the presidential primary despite asslicking northerners by speaking hausa. Last I heard, the court granted him medical leave abroad. It seems it'll be a while before he surfaces again

3) ENYINNAYA ABARIBE

This guy calls himself "MMAGHA ND'IGBO" (Sword of Igbos) . He was very popular as Senate minority leader. Always castigating Buhari and his policies. But since defecting from PDP to APGA, very little is heard of him

4) UDOM EMMANUEL

I remember when NL frontpage used to be filled with testimonies of Udom's rule in Akwaibom. I rarely see it now. Since the PDP presidential primary, I've rarely heard from him. Is he going to the Senate or not?

5) ABUBAKAR MALAMI

Last I heard of the AGF, he was contesting for Kebbi gov. Did he win the primary? I rarely hear of him anymore. Indeed, life and position is transient


Add to this list guys, let's discuss and have fun

I dey here....I don buy this land...beware of scammers

I know this guy, he is Ivorian. A very good finisher.

Chai, my prayers are with him, in this most trying moments of his life

potland:
the way its going, in five years time ninety percent of nigerian girls will be doing hookup. Where i wan see wife material like dis?

The one I dey with now, her eye dey hook up, I don try my best to calm her down, but the girl need the hook up badly so anytime she show sign of it again...I will break up and let her go. I don tell her papa