₦airaland Forum

Saw this on the thread and I had to laugh.
My people too stubborn. My people no dey listen

I had no idea ppl could speak in tongues with keypads

...

cutedharmee:
May all d good tinz of dis life fall on u.
May everypart be smooth fr u
May every corner bring u happy surprises
May everyday put a smile on ur face
May u get whatever u always wished for
Continue to soar high.
Harpee belated bufdae HUNGERBAD

wow this just 2017... Life is meaningless.
Rest easy HUNGERBAD

MrMcJay:
I sent her a message and told her there was a vacancy if she was interested. Pay was good and was flexible too. She told me not to send her messages again so that I don't hack her Facebook.

I told her to check my profile as I'm a lawyer and not a rifftaff. Told her the opening was for an international NGO coming to Akwa Ibom and pay was above 200k - pay was actually around 350k). Told her not to bother replying me cos she has missed the opportunity.

you can't blame the lady tho if you have even been scammed.

BoboKush:
This one no even get sense.... We wey knw something tel u say 225 na TM wey aboki they run for street werey say ferrous..... Ferrous kee u dere....
OPP blow m ntn go do u

hahahha

MrMumu:
I took one full one bro i gallant.

E dey be me as if i dey on ship cruise for river Naija with Cardi B now

well don man. Naa so e dey start.

99thEnemy:
It is Neo not New

bros no vex... Wetin I know

frenzyduchess:
some of them know,but just conclude their case will be different based on the assurance from their sponsor.

on a lighter note, this reminds reminds me of L

GistNotice:

Either way you look at it. No where in Nigeria is safe

Adeola25:
I think I was 8yrs old then, I went with my mum to her sister's place, on getting there we meet her washing clothes. She was complaining that she hasn't eaten since morning, that she doesn't have money to buy foodstuff that it was one of her neighbors that gave her small rice to chop. She come ask if I was hungry, I said yes. Hmm, I finished the food she come dey look me some how. when we reach home if u see the kind beating wey I received from my mum ehn. I will never forget.

lol

frenzyduchess:
I still wonder how someone will make up their mind to travel out to hustle and they will pick Arab countries. . I feel pity for ladies when I hear them say they are going to Dubai, Oman ,Turkey etc to work.

it's isn't really like you think it is. Most of these women were cajole into thinking those places are money mining centers....

Casan0va:
This can be really annoying. One harassed me 2 weeks ago and took my phone.

I even know the bastard. No need to involve Sars for fear of reprisals, but that guy is a walking deadman.
I don't need to join cult to fix him. Fix him I will.

Sometime in the future, I'll be in an advantageous position and I'll kill him like a chicken.

he took your phone? When he took your phone, did you just walk home? Reply asap please

olaolaking:
Pleaae people, what is NBM and OT?

I searched Google. It means
New Black Movement
OrienTation

No mind the idiot. Him think say you go school but na cult you go. Make I explain all to you.

To disagree with a vengeance or to do anything that way is to do so very strongly or with ZEAL.

You follow now? Make sure your pikin no enter this Aye cult thing in future, bro. You see as you dey Leggo upndan you no want that for the pikin wey go look after you for your old age. Him no go get better job like you now

this thread funny die

ediko5:
Idris Aloma I've been watching your videos on NBM jolly gyration and their secrey on YouTube.

Are you Hausa that you were given "Idris Aloma"?

Another important question is: Did you publicly denounce your membership of NBM in the presence your family members and DSS before joining the DSS?

you asked an intelligent question I wanted to ask but prefer to pass by in silence

saynotocultism:
Sorry guys, today was hectic .

I joined the remaining aspiring members and we faced the bush part . After sometime, we where asked to move in an assembly fashion . Like the slave trade movement , but instead of the metal chains used in real slavery, we where asked to put our hands on each other’s shoulders and move in a uniform fashion . As we moved ,

Cult members echoed : ju ju ju
Aspiring members echoed out : sir sir sir

The process of screaming ju ju ju and sir sir sir continued as we matched on . I heard signs of cassava stems and huge branches of trees cracking up, I raised my head and saw each of the cultist following us holding a stem each. Immediately I received a painful flog directly on my bare back,

“ You dey craze , who say make you carry your head up “

immediately my friend who took me for the initiation became angry and almost fought the guy who flogged me ... Immediately I started crying and the thought to run cams into my mind but I had to face the consequences . If I die tonight , my family don’t even know my where about . We where then asked to stop and a guy came around with a piece of paper to take down our names and departments. We then continued our journey . We then got an open field and we where told to lie down . Suddenly I saw a fearfully looking guy with a red regalia , I looked closely , guess what guys ,

IT WAS MY FRIEND IN THE SAME DEPARTMENT.

We will call him kelvin ( not his real name )

I echoed his name :

Kelvin , Kelvin Na me frank ... immediately the other cultist pounced on me.

“ You dey craze , call am bros Kelvin “

I was stubborn and immediately I saw a double barrel shotgun facing my end , I then shouted

“Bros , bros , bros. , chairman Kelvin”

They all laughed at me and called me JU.

I then heard “after 0:0 hours , make mending start “ we where told to
Lie down and suddenly we started receiving flogging on our asses . Then I saw someone putting on a black regalia and he came to where we where receiving the flogging of our lives and echoed out “ NO BACK MENDING “ meaning they should not let the stems to touch our backs . We received flogging on our asses for close to 4 hours . Do you understand what it means to receive constant lashing on a particular spot for hours ? I did for five hours . My fellow ju mate close to me pooed on himself . Smelling poo. Another ju guy was shouting he was sick and they overlooked . They came angry thinking the man was pretending , they dragged him out to the center and focused on him while others focused on us. The next thing I heard was

“ THE JU DON LEGGO, HE NO DEY MOVE AGAIN “ then one of the came around and shot his double barrel at the dead man to confirm if he is dead . Immediately they carried him away deep down into the bush . Then the man with he black regalia echoed out,

“ shebi una see that man wey die, if ju misbehave, he go join that man wey die “

This immediately sent a cold sensation down my spine .

The place where we pulled our shirt is called Angle 90

The process we started movement holding our shoulders and responding to ju ju ju using sir sir sir is know as slave trade . The place where we where asked to lie down, is known as ju camp .

Stay tuned for more update from me........

TBC......:

wow

Danelo:
This thread sha...
Everybody na hard man on internet till they meet One on one.
Me I dey follow comments bumper to bumper.

Bros I tell you.

Unrated900:
Bro forget oooo that man is right believe me


When I was in school even the so called police all belongs

Bankers belong

Okada riders belong


To a point I no come get gal friend

Cos all the fine gal dey date cultist.

If you cal a gal to date,they will ask you which parole u dey

If you replied by saying I no understand

They will say mugu ju


Na So one ask me say which parole I dey,I tell am say I be MAN U fans

She slapped me straight.

Alaye fear them ooooo

hahhabahha why you no con slap your own back

bounty007:
You're covered.... Those wey dey threaten you are lost souls of Koro...
Death is closing in on them per second.. .

hahahha which network? Mtn or airtel?

Hadampson:
It depends on the location. If i get the 200K job in Bauchi, kwara, Jigawa, and some states where things are cheap, i won't call it a poor job but if the job is in Lagos, Abuja, River etc, then I would have to agree with Cyberknight


A 200K job in kwara is like a 30K job in Lagos

200k job in Kwara ? Graduate entry level? Where in Kwara?

I go like apply

Lexusgs430:
Where is my passport, I need to visit Turkey, some Turkey's require plucking............

lol bros

Cyberknight:
200k a good job in 2019 Nigeria? Perhaps, but only if the holder intends to remain single and has no other responsibilities.

honestly you don't need upto 100k monthly salary to make your marriage work.
People stay single because they want to be single. It has absolutely nothing to do with money.

Ibrahim94:
Good morning Nairalanders,

I guess we all had a great night rest.

please I really need Zenith Bank past Questions.

I can be reached via: ibrahimabiodun94@mail.com.

Thanks as I await for positive response.

bro good evening. I saw a notification on Nairaland but I don't have access to my mail right now. How many I be of help?

Drshobz:
lienus mbakwa
continue with ur lie
u dey slap am like say na u born am

you seem not to know the power you wield when you are on a woman during sex

Mine

nanauju:
Sent

thanks alot. May the good lord grant your desires

nanauju:
Send me a pm

thanks I have sent it

nanauju:
Sorry don't usually reply pm. But since you said it's important, let me check my email. I'm guessing it's job or past questions related

good evening. I was wondering if you could share the gmat questions with me please

....

edulifehack:
am a student currently based in Delta
ikoyi is quite far away

I will suggest you get in touch with your state government. If the business is viable you will be linked. Don't be afraid that someone will steal your invention. you still have patent right over your invention