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Nairaland Forum › Funlord's Profile › Funlord's Posts

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Rap Battles › Re: Flow For Rank by funlord(m):
cool
The Baby battler:....................

I took a break now everyone else thinks they got skill/
too bad I'm still spitting flows hotter than a chefs barbecue grill/


The lords back but the flow never left as you were meant to believe/
plus biting my scripture's a sure way to get your loved ones bereaved/


None of you t.c's are even "has beens", your more like "never will be's"/
Your "thesis on stale flows" deservedly earned ya'll your wack t.c degrees/


All your rhymes are like lullabyes, they put
the public to sleep/
they're boring, witless and weak and fully deserve to remain 6 feet deep/


Your cheap flows probably cost like a naira per dozen/
And your _retarded comebacks makes me
think your parents were cousins/


Think you got rhymes be my guest and kindly holla on back/
the lord will only use you and abuse you like a hooker on crack/


So go battle a lightweight before calling out this ace/
Before the lord bites your ear off like Tyson and spits it back in your face/


And try writing a lot harder if you finally choose to reply/
cause each time i bust my pen out, its a guaranteed bullseye/



Now act like good little boys and do as my good book foretold/
you've all got no business in the rap game, you all got to know when to fold.





No feedback needed! I don't write rhymes, I write checks!!!
Politics › Re: What Does An Average Nigerian Citizen Benefit From The Government by funlord(m): 6:23pm On Oct 26, 2015
undecided
Corruption!
Politics › Re: Why Rivers Should Return Nyesome Wike In The Governorship Rerun by funlord(m): 6:17pm On Oct 26, 2015
cry
TonyeBarcanista:
Rivers state is a multiethnic society but one thing that has kept us together in fairness, equity and unity of purpose. As the rerun election approaches, many riverians look forward to return Nyesom Wike to Government House as they did in April 11. Though I recognise that the good people of Rivers state will return Wike to power, this article is to lay support to the decision of Rivers people.

1. Riverine/Upland Agreement Has No Effect On Wike:
While it is true that since 1999, the upland has been occupying the number one seat of rivers state, it is also true to recognise that Nyesome Wike wouldn't have been the candidate of the riverine communities IF a riverine person had done what he did to challenge the madness of ex-governor Amaechi and his APC mad house. Wike was not the only minister from rivers state during Jonathan's era, he was however, the only one that stood his ground, defended Jonathan, an illustrious son of the Niger delta, got insulted and abused by the APC and their agents on Jonathan's behalf. Dakuku Peterside, though a riverine man is unfit to preach the riverine/upland agreement when he was the same person that vigorously campaigned against Jonathan for his parochial interest and made a fool of himself on March 28 to please his masters in Bourdillon road and Daura. It was Wike that stood by the Rivers people, it was Wike that stood by our brother Jonathan. So if we the riverine communities are to consider voting based on "sentiment", it is NYESOM Wike that fits the bill. Dakuku's master, Amaechi once declared that Jonathan, an Ijawman isn't his brother, Wike never denied the brotherhood between himself, an Ikwerre man and Jonathan. As a riverine, Dakuku is our blood brother, but he doesn't represent us.

2. Ikwerre Deserves The Position:
The spirit of Rivers state is one that promotes unity and give everyone a sense of belonging. It is fair that the Ikwerre nation, produce the Governor of the state since the Senator representing Rivers East, George Sekibo is a riverine man from Okrika. It is only fair and deserving that the Ikwerre nation produce the Governor. Rivers state is known for fairness. We gave mandate to Peter Odili, an Ndoni man in 1999 and 2003 not considering the minority population. In 2007 we shifted the mandate to Celestine Omehia/Rotimi Amaechi, not minding the fact that he's an uplander. In 2011 we returned Amaechi to power because we believe that the Ikwerres deserve an unbreakable 8years in office. In April 11, we dumped Peterside but queued behind Wike despite his Ikwerre root because we saw the spirit of Rivers in him. It is time to once again tell the Ikwerres that their son is indeed worthy of the mandate that the court erroneously voided. Upland or Riverine, Rivers is not divided.

3. Like Abiye Sekibo, Like Dakuku Peterside:
To those that may not know, Sekibo is an Ijawman from Okrika. Despite being an Ijaw son, his kinsmen(we) have vowed never to thumb-print for him in ANY election. In fact, it is safe to state that it is easier for the son of the Sultan of Sokoto to be elected Chairman of Okrika Local government than for Sekibo, a son of the soil. The reason is simple, Sekibo as SSG and Minister (under Obj) pioneered cultism and never brought development in the state. He brought riverine sentiment against Amaechi in 2011 as ACN candidate but was highly defeated in the riverine region(and the entire state)

On Peterside, he positioned himself as an enemy of Niger delta, Rivers state and the riverine people by his disgraceful drama during the Presidential election. He led his thugs to demonstrate against the will of the people when they thump-printed for Jonathan. Peterside has positioned himself to be seen as one that seeks to please his external masters. He's a puppet that is best suited for an appointment as PA to his master Rotimi Amaechi.

4. APC Government In Rivers State Was Disaster:
While the PDP government of Rotimi Amaechi that lasted between 2007 and 2012 was one of the best in the history of the state, the APC government of Amaechi that lasted between 2013 and sent parking in May 2015 was the WORST government ever in Rivers state. It was the APC government led by Amaechi that shut down the courts and state house of assembly, and also put the state in comatose. Amaechi's APC government refused to pay salaries for 3months and failed to appoint Chief judge of the state. Wike led PDP government came on-board and reversed the madness. Amaechi's APC government that we have thrown into the dust bin of history is Dakuku personified.

I believe in the true spirit and determination of rivers state to seal up the dust-bin that APC belongs. Our state can not be led by one that is not for us.


#NyesomWikeForGovernor
This boy and gibberish sef! You no dey tire to wail?
Politics › Re: Chibok Girls Will Be Released On Monday - Boko Haram by funlord(m): 5:57pm On Oct 26, 2015
angry

This lie wan resemble the type when I use collect mr smith £1000 through yahoo levels, only say my own been make more sense! O.p own resemble naija film type! Nonsense!
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: Official Manchester United Fan Thread:''20 Times EPL Champion by funlord(m): 3:49pm On Oct 26, 2015
lipsrsealed
SIRcumalot:
We passed that breaking point 5 games ago.
I don't want Muller (I don't understand that guy)

Rooney should stay on the bench "for rest" just for like 3 games make we see how far.
I really think you need to go and take a look @ mr mullers ENTIRE goals haul for bayern, and also make sure you watch HIM in particular during their rematch with arsenal!! Imagine "muller" supporting "martial" as a number 10? Or "martial and lewandowski" as a partnership? Dude any option other than this "wahala wayne" is necessary @ this juncture! And guess who developed muller anyway? Gaal!!! There is a reason bayern had to scream @ man united to stop e-mailing about muller! The wheels are turning!
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: Official Manchester United Fan Thread:''20 Times EPL Champion by funlord(m): 12:50pm On Oct 26, 2015
grin
coogar:
this one is more brutal.....

https://www.nairaland.com/871307/official-manchester-united-fan-thread/2320#39359903
The tide seems to be turning @ last! I think next summer the club is going to break the bank for either "lewandowski, muller or some other supreme striking force waiting in the wings"! This season is rooneys last chance saloon and I know for a fact that van gaal is going to drop him @ some breaking point this season! He should ask rivaldo, mario gomez or luca toni!
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: Official Manchester United Fan Thread:''20 Times EPL Champion by funlord(m): 11:19am On Oct 26, 2015
lipsrsealed

When Wayne Rooney scored at Goodison last
weekend, people queued up to tell us why, actually, this is why you don’t write off the man. The last 2 games have demonstrated that, in his current guise, disappointment is the rule, not exception.

It’s not just that Rooney is offering nothing to
United’s attack; he is hampering it significantly.
Martial, Mata and Herrera can do all they can to take attacks so far, but at some point their team-mate needs to get involved. Then all promise turns to dust.

It is as if Rooney is playing with lead weights under
his shirt, labouring around the opposition half like a
35-year-old League Two striker telling everyone
who’ll listen that he’s still got it. He completed nine
passes in the first half, and gave the ball away
seven times. There is an increasingly familiar Old
Trafford groan reserved for a Rooney pass
straight into touch. It is becoming the soundtrack
of his decline.

The bizarre thing about Rooney is just how much goodwill he retains from those within the game, he is effectively immune to criticism. Here is his game in numbers: No shots on target, No chances created. A passing accuracy of 55% (the lowest on the pitch). Lost possession 28 times (highest on the pitch). One touch in the opposition penalty area.

Yet the only reaction from Gary Neville was to
twice praise Rooney for his defensive work, while
Martin Tyler remarked that he was “defensively
responsible at 30”. For a striker, that should be
the ultimate damnation by faint praise. The person with the most faith is Van Gaal, who still starts Rooney to the detriment of the team. Depay has struggled to settle in during his early months in England, but at least with Depay, age provides reason for patience.

More importantly, playing Depay on the left would
allow Martial to operate as a central striker. For a manager who demands movement from his forwards, it is difficult to see how dropping Rooney wouldn’t assist United’s creativity. Van
Gaal must surely now be at least considering that
option.

In terms of this game, the biggest crime was that
Rooney stayed on until the final whistle. He may
once have been United’s magic man, the player
who could conjure something out of nothing to win
you the game, but that time has passed. He was
a 90-minute passenger.

“Sir, I have to talk every week about Rooney,”
said United’s manager to a journalist in his post-
match press conference. “Why? I don’t give any
opinion. Sick of it. You have your opinion, write
it.” Not as sick as some United fans are at the
free ride given to the captain.

When having faith that Rooney could rediscover his greatness, bear this question in mind: What did he excel at? The 3 most obvious responses to that
question are pace, power and positive aggression.
Not only do all now look lost, but these are
impossible characteristics to switch on and off.
You can’t just decide to have more pace or add
ten times more power, and the aggression in
Rooney’s game has been reduced to swearing in
the direction of the officials. He has become a
parody of the jaded striker, a brightness dulled by
the rigours of his career. He is the old fighter still
stepping into the ring but now being punched from
rope to rope.

So the question to Rooney’s backers is this: What
are you waiting for? Rooney isn’t naturally fit
enough to regain his missing athleticism. He’s
played too many career games to find the spark associated with his early years at United. He has never been the type of striker who you would expect to redefine his style in order to prolong his career. It’s all very sad, but there’s a shell of a player where Wayne Rooney used to be. Van Gaal is one of few who must still have faith, and even that is waning.

Daniel storey nails it hardcore.................
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: Official Manchester United Fan Thread:''20 Times EPL Champion by funlord(m): 8:03am On Oct 26, 2015
grin

What other better way is there to start the day / week than by with a dig @ your rivals? Enjoy.....

https://fbcdn-video-b-a.akamaihd.net/hvideo-ak-xtf1/v/t42.1790-2/12180335_10153052910996529_659747322_n.mp4?efg=eyJybHIiOjQyOCwicmxhIjo5OTIsInZlbmNvZGVfdGFnIjoic2QifQ%3D%3D&rl=428&vabr=238&oh=70c3c8c735f95984eff4751f8d70f01e&oe=562EFCD6&__gda__=1445987815_4c0ec1b251d089d840609645b759ef47


Aarekakanfo come translate for expatriates abeg!
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: Official Manchester United Fan Thread:''20 Times EPL Champion by funlord(m): 9:53pm On Oct 25, 2015
undecided

Any man united fan that still has the temerity to come here to still attempt to justify "wayne rooneys" inclusion in this team should be considered a "rival!"

End of!!!
Politics › Re: BREAKING: President Of Nigerian Prostitutes, Jessica Elvis Is Dead by funlord(m): 9:27pm On Oct 25, 2015
shocked
See news?
Politics › Re: Rivers Rerun: APC, Buhari Scheming To Make Rivers and Nigeria Ungovernable? by funlord(m): 9:11pm On Oct 25, 2015
grin
TonyeBarcanista:
Nobody wants to burn down the country except APC
Bia this failed blogger! You never tire to wail?

You go sabi cry for biscuit for primary school that time when you small oh!
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: Official Manchester United Fan Thread:''20 Times EPL Champion by funlord(m): 8:23pm On Oct 25, 2015
angry
dopeJemi:
I disagree, azin completely
Leave this homie! Maybe he prefers how rooney UNDER DOES THINGS instead? Like that senseless cross field pass he sent from midfield to the assistant linesman when all his team mates where still jogging forward and had not gotten into their positions!
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: Official Manchester United Fan Thread:''20 Times EPL Champion by funlord(m): 7:45pm On Oct 25, 2015
angry

Why are these dudes all yapping about the defence/defenders? That was the strongest part of our game today! The ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM IS ROONEY! Why is he being given a free pass? He was the worst player out of all the 22 men on that pitch today!

misplaced passes? Losing possession? Wrong options? Frustrating martial? What sort of captain is that abeg? This was 3 points LOST!
Celebrities › Re: Photos: Olamide Makes “funny Faces” While Getting An Haircut In London, Announce by funlord(m): 6:55pm On Oct 25, 2015
angry
NaijNewsToday:
https://www.thenews.ng/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/olamide-london1-504x640.jpg
Olamide is that one celebrity that loves to share photos, give his fans an insight to his everyday life and events.

https://www.thenews.ng/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/olamide-london2-551x640.jpg

The rapper who recently announced that his 5th album will be dropping before the end of the year is presently in London.

The rapper decided to share a "SNAP VIDEO" from his visit to the Barbershop to get all cleaned and ready for Friday night’s balling. The comic rapper decided to show off some funny faces.

SOURCE: http://www.thenews.ng/2015/10/25/photos-olamide-makes-funny-faces-while-getting-"AN-HAIRCUT"-in-london-announces-5th-album/


.
Number 1: what the _fuck is a SNAP VIDEO?

Number 2: AN HAIRCUT?

And you want to become a blogger shey? My friend no allow me pack you slap through your phone now now oh? Be careful with these "gbagauns" in the future!
Politics › Re: Judith Amaechi Celebrates Wike's Sack By Tribunal (Photos) by funlord(m): 2:46pm On Oct 25, 2015
lipsrsealed
Profbrian:
what is the meaning of UKWU?
It means "ass, booty, butt cheeks, buttocks, hips and melons"!!!
Politics › Re: Judith Amaechi Celebrates Wike's Sack By Tribunal (Photos) by funlord(m): 2:45pm On Oct 25, 2015
Oops!
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: Official Manchester United Fan Thread:''20 Times EPL Champion by funlord(m): 12:33pm On Oct 25, 2015
lipsrsealed
codedguy1:
Moyes is the ONLY solution for Chelsea right now.

grin


As the match today! I don't even know what to expect with el jefe, his philosophy, selection and almighty Rooney. We would be making a big statement winning this game.
Our only hope is if he can use that "sailor xy's" selection as it is on this page! We should just stick to the same unchanged side that walloped everton! We really need these 3 points because arsenal just wan dey use style dey increase the distance between them and the rest of the chasing pack!

Rooney( impossicant sha), Fellaini, valencia, blind, carrick and depay should all remain on the BENCH!
Romance › Re: What To Do When The Girl You Love Is In Love With Another Man by funlord(m): 12:26pm On Oct 25, 2015
angry


ﺍﻟﻠﻬﻢ ﺍﻏﻔﺮ ﻟﻔﻠﺎﻥ ﻭﺍﺭﻓﻊ ﺩﺭﺟﺘﻪ ﻓﻲ ﺍﻟﻤﻬﺪﻳﻴﻦ ﻭﺍﺧﻠﻔﻪ ﻓﻲ ﻋﻘﺒﻪ ﻓﻲ ﺍﻟﻐﺎﺑﺮﻳﻦ ﻭﺍﻏﻔﺮ ﻟﻨﺎ ﻭﻟﻪ ﻳﺎ ﺭﺏ ﺍﻟﻌﺎﻟﻤﻴﻦ ﻭﺃﻓﺴﺢ ﻟﻪ ﻓﻲ ﻗﺒﺮﻩ ﻭﻧﻮﺭ ﻟﻪ ﻓﻴﻪ
Romance › Re: 10 Things A Guy Will Do If He Likes You by funlord(m): 12:24pm On Oct 25, 2015
angry


ﺍﻟﻠﻬﻢ ﺍﻏﻔﺮ ﻟﻔﻠﺎﻥ ﻭﺍﺭﻓﻊ ﺩﺭﺟﺘﻪ ﻓﻲ ﺍﻟﻤﻬﺪﻳﻴﻦ ﻭﺍﺧﻠﻔﻪ ﻓﻲ ﻋﻘﺒﻪ ﻓﻲ ﺍﻟﻐﺎﺑﺮﻳﻦ ﻭﺍﻏﻔﺮ ﻟﻨﺎ ﻭﻟﻪ ﻳﺎ ﺭﺏ ﺍﻟﻌﺎﻟﻤﻴﻦ ﻭﺃﻓﺴﺢ ﻟﻪ ﻓﻲ ﻗﺒﺮﻩ ﻭﻧﻮﺭ ﻟﻪ ﻓﻴﻪ
Politics › Re: Judith Amaechi Celebrates Wike's Sack By Tribunal (Photos) by funlord(m): 11:47am On Oct 25, 2015
grin

The woman carry some "UKWU" for there oh?

Anyway back to the matter! Bad belle? Its very allowed! Keep on rocking "mrs minister"!

#Wike don waka!
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: Official Manchester United Fan Thread:''20 Times EPL Champion by funlord(m): 11:35am On Oct 25, 2015
grin

I don tire 2 laff! God forbid!


Moyes currently has a better title defence record than Moanrinho:


Defending Premier League champions after
10 games:

Moyes at Man Utd: 17 points

Mourinho at Chelsea: 11 points


MOY>RINHO!

Dating And Meet-up Zone › Re: "Chat Central and Derailer's Paradise"...Welcome! by funlord(m): 11:11am On Oct 25, 2015
cool
Learn the hustle 1st: https://m.facebook.com/barcodeloungekd



Attend the Next level event:

Rap Battles › Re: ++++ Rap Section Derailers Haven +++++ by funlord(m): 11:05am On Oct 25, 2015
cool




1st Get familiar: https://m.facebook.com/barcodeloungekd


Next level event: look down!

European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: Official Manchester United Fan Thread:''20 Times EPL Champion by funlord(m): 10:37am On Oct 25, 2015
Team news on players out for both sides:


"It's pretty good, because only "Luke Shaw"
and "Paddy McNair" are long-term injuries! "Ashley Young" has had three weeks out of training sessions so cannot play against City."....Van gall on MUTV!


"The list of injured players is the same from the last game. It is "David Silva", "Sergio Aguero", "Samir Nasri", "Fabian Delph" and "Gael Clichy."
.....Pellegrini

Advantage man united then! Its the tactics and line up employed by gaal that will make or mar this game for us!
Politics › Re: Nyesom Wike: I Can Never Be Intimidated! by funlord(m): 9:33am On Oct 25, 2015
grin

Abeg this execu-thief school son of "diaris patience" should go and sleep! After all that's what he knows how to do best!







#WIKE DON WAKA
Politics › Re: Reminder: “I Will Lead A War Against Them Like Ojukwu. Am Not Joking” – Wike by funlord(m): 9:09am On Oct 25, 2015
grin
ARIZONA123:
Cc:Tobias Tambolo AKA Truckpusher
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: Official Manchester United Fan Thread:''20 Times EPL Champion by funlord(m): 8:37am On Oct 25, 2015
smiley

Derby day reminder for those who may have had too much henny, coke and hashish last night! Live coverage from 3pm!

Where should martial begin today? Top or wings? Any need for carrick to start? Should Memphis still remain repping the sofa? Phil jones or daley blind @ the back?

Questions aplenty!

Rap Battles › Re: 2 Lines To Diss The Person Above You by funlord(m):
grin
KittenPaws:
you really don't want to piss me off.. i'm all for dissing or what not but if you think degrading women all in the name of "rap" is what gets you aroused, then you are nothing but a waste of sperm and the best part of you clearly got swallowed. Please, do NOT breed.

Funlord, you sound like a sexist, misogynist, tea-bagging idi-ot. You should call the board of education and ask for a refund. They failed you.
Look @ this chibok demon that types crap for a living getting her period over strangers? You need to beg the lord to send some lightning to strike your immature and supremely _stupid ass down so that you can spare some oxygen for beings that matter or assist with organ donation! You are currently existing as an obstacle to human development and an utter waste of space on the planet!


And since you are so "_stupid not to realise that everyone is supposed to post a diss based on the moniker of the individual directly above them hence the name of the thread"? Then what's the point in educating a deluded, scuzzy, psychotic, _twat any further? I'm sure your not only a carrier but must also be seriously suffering the effects from that new strand of the AIDS virus, Abysmal IQ Deficiency Syndrome! _Fuck outta here! Vapid pleb.........

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