₦airaland Forum

Bogusmoney:
To be honest I used to be a critic of men who don’t seek advice from their wife but I think I am beginning to understand better. Don’t get me wrong , no one has monopoly of knowledge and some women definitely have good ideas. However, in general I don’t think most women give logical advice that is free from selfish view points

bogusmoney which advice your wife give you wen put you for more trouble.?

abi she dey give you advice wen dey make you to squander your bogus money?

Goodmarlian:
There is this girl I have being wooing for a while now,she replies my chats with speed,
She views almost everything I post on my status and likes them ,subconsciously I got convinced she likes me and mind you she is a church girl type who attends fellowship regularly.this girls always checks up on me first and I found it cool.

2 days ago I tried testing the waters I told her I would like her to come around and spend some time with me she declined so I concluded it could be because of her religious upbringing she may consider it morally wrong so I didn’t bother her again.

We just continued talking after some time in the middle of our conversation she told me she can’t date a guy like me and I asked her why she just kept me on hold for a long time she didn’t reply I immediately cancelled her in my mind because a girl who genuinely likes you will not make such a statement I knew this one wants to play mind games with me so I just told her not to worry that I never really liked her either that I have friendzone her since the day she refused to come around when I asked her
This girl immediately replied me bye bye and blocked me asap

I saw her this morning she was looking so sad and didn’t even greet me.
My question is since she doesn’t wanna date a guy like me why is she sad I made such a statement women reject men with brutality and get depressed when the same is done to them .

error! you shouldn't have told her dt you dnt like her . Dt you av friend zone her since.

you said you have been wooing her meaning you like her .

As she said she cnt date a guy like you, a simple "okay" response from you is sufficient.

In dis scenario,you shouldn't have replied the lady's statement wit a direct response youngman.

you feel so awkward for a no because you are a deep thinker.

it's your thoughts dt is affecting your self esteem.

Over analysing why she said no. you assume dt no makes you see urself less and she more of herself.


Dnt feel awkward next time. Just see her as sm1 dt is not ur audience.

Move to the next.

newoffer:
Life ehn. This is 10years of me and my cherikoko. 2026 first give me gbasgbos. I lost my Dad. Before I could return back landlord sold his property. Immediately u hit 40 alot of life challenges will spring up. That's when a lot of people are celebrating and others are going through life challenges.
I had to bury the dead then come back to face house matter. I was able to fix that after the burial then come another one. Children school also the owner sold his property.
This 2026 is really tough. If I don't celebrate this 10th wedding anniversary I sure have reasons. U see women are one breed that will not understand simple things even if they are part of it. Struggling to pay school fees because we got to get a new school.
The life of a man.

same story facing man ryt now.

Alot of money was spent on babys sickness few weeks to burial.

just came bk frm Burial expenses this month.

Got an eviction notice to leave the huz by Dec.

man is damn broke. account don red. man is indebted.

there are sometimes dt your being hit simultaneously wit life challenges dt all you can muster is to stay numb.

Pukkalolo:
A responsible single man with a job… I mean, practically ANY job… can possibly retire by age 45, provided he lives within his means, saves consistently, and stays away from money-sinking addictions.

But when a woman comes into the picture, then chances are that he's not getting out of the "rat race" anytime soon.

I’m not saying female companionship is bad. The right woman is an asset. She multiplies your peace, your focus, and your progress.

But the wrong one becomes an expensive leak in your life. Suddenly the money that was supposed to buy your freedom is paying for her lifestyle, her demands, her emotional emergencies, and her endless “needs.”

This is why you need to be extremely selective about the woman you commit to.

Don't just ask yourself whether she's beautiful, whether you enjoy her company, or whether you're sexually attracted to her.

Ask yourself: Does this woman make the life I'm trying to build easier or more difficult?

To some extent you are right but it's not a woman dt makes life easier or difficult. It' is now becoming more of the present day Nigeria economy.

Back in the days, the man is the sole provider while the woman/wife is a stay at home wife/mum.

The men cud shoulder responsibilities at home all alone wit little or no assistance frm their woman.

But now even when both the man nd woman are financially independent, they are struggling to meet up.

some mens income has already been dwarf by oda expenditure before the money touch down to the wife hand.

standard of living is getting bad across all board generally. As the men are facing it, the financial independent women too are also feeling the heat.

see how crazy huz rent has sky rocketed, agent fee alone now to rent huz use to be total package before to rent a new apartment is dt one cause by a woman?

see how transport fare has also increased, to travel by road frm Lagos to east, the tfare for one person alone na smbodyelse salary for 1mnt. is dt one caused by a woman?

see how medical has also gone up. to do cs now in an average equiped hospital na die. No be woman cause am.

wat Abt sch fees dt keeps going up in schools. no be woman make am difficult.

wat Abt feeding? dt one is a necessity. It's not a luxury. your woman/wife must eat.

By the way, how many husbands can do extravagant spending on their wife these days.

Most of diz women we see doing well are the ones hustling the money for themselves.

there are plenty bachelor in their 30's and 40"s we hear say dt they can't afford marriage because their pay is low. Indirectly they mean their purchasing power is weak.

These are guys with no woman by their side.

I think the struggle we face in meeting up wit needs in our day to day living is rooted more as a ripple effect from the economy.

wat gives most of them the assurance is the nos of guys flocking around Dem before they got stuck wit a child or children out of wedlock.

such memories is the propeller and they refresh ,refresh again such faded memory in their mind of the past. Esp wen they get flattered by dos street urchins within the neborhood.

You and I kno say street urchin no get taste , Dem go say hole na hole. As diff street guys drill their hole indiscriminately,they assume any oda responsible marriage suitor too wud love their cookie. Bt a responsible man looking for a wife go wan do a thorough checklist before him enter.

And maybe it's been long they look at the mirror. because if they did recently, they will observe dt their miss world beautiful appearance and glowing skin don dey enter bush.

skin don dey wrinkle. skin don dey get tan. eyes wen white don dey red. white killer set of teeth wen dey make guys get attracted to her don dey turn brown. breast no stand firm again. her gait don change. her poise don drop.

Once an individual start giving birth to children, your anatomy and physiological features go begin drop.

I don't know if they understand this or they are just floating in false hope.

most of the tym the spec of woman we end up as our spouse tends to be different frm wat we had in our head before wifying her.

You want a slim person, she may truly be slim as ur spec . issue of character defect may be the barrier.

You want a partner dt is financially strong, dt one fit dey rubbish wealth for ur face.

You want a fleshy lady. issue of genotype may be the defect dt will disqualify her.

you want a tall lady, you see exactly wat you want, issue of tribe may be the blockage.

You want an educated person, she may be stubborn and not respectful.

You want sm1 wit good character bt she may be not av the vibe you like.

You end up finding sm1 ticking 98% of ur box, maybe na one story or bad past history Abt her you hear go discourage you.

And you may also get wat you want in a partner maybe na the mother or family people you no like or Dem no like you.

You cnt get a total complete package in a person. you av to compromise some area of weakness and console urself wit the oda strength she has.

What we shud watch out for most, is a partner dt will give you peace of mind and sm1 you vibe wit very well.

Person wen slim go fat tomorrow. Dt fat wen you no want initially dey wait for you for front wen she born pikin.


And person wen fat today, as she age, the fat go begin drop.

Food for thought:

will you divorce her if she later chng frm thin, begin add weight and bcom fat?

Or will you divorce her too if she later turn frm fat to thin due to ageing?

Marry sm1 dt you enjoy spending momentswith com rain or sunshine. DTs wat counts.

Igodomigodo, DTs a good one . discipline it's all you need to put into action henceforth. it not easy but very possible to be faithful.

maybe for content.


maybe for content

it is a wrong act but not unusual to young newly wed. The feeling of singleness still dey there.

probably you have some spare time to fiddle wit your fone most of the time flipping different dating sites chatting wit gals.

You av not been occupied wit wat comes wit marriage.likely you av not been enmeshed wit loads of financial responsibility hitting you back to back in dt marriage DTs why.

wat makes majority of us marid people loose interest in frivolities outside marriage is billing.

shebi na man wen get enof cash for pocket and spare tym dey look anoda woman face.

wisdomkid:
So she should just brush him away, and tomorrow, you'll come here and tag all girls rude and that they always believe all men want to sleep with them? She should just frown, scream at him, and tell him never to contact her again? Someone old enough to be her dad on her first time seeing her?

Na men like you dey make feminists no wan repent, everything has to be the lady's fault somehow.

Me and you na man. make we no deceive ourself. wen a man start asking Abt a lady frm a third party, dt man dey admire her frm afar.

Let's be honest wit ourselves. If it was ur own blood, would you have counsel your own sister in this way to do exactly wat dis lady did? Collect his nos and be calling him.

she cn only do dt if the landlady told her dt her broda will now be in charge of rent collection. DTs wen she cn do dt.

good morning sir..... goodeveng sir and go ur own way is enough.

Now dt the calabash has broken and the water has spilled, do you think dis lady in this situation will keep relating wit dt man?

If the landladys relative was a female, it wud not raise any dust but a man and mind you she lives alone?

SmartyPants:
Some comments are not necessary. How can you say he probably had a side income as if you knew him personally? Then you even ascribed an imaginary figure of 100k to support your unreasonable evercise in speculation. Are you more or better informed than the family that has gotten to see even his payslip? Stop this bad behavior.

my point here is to highlight wat some men probably go tru behind the scene to meet up financial demands in the home.

most husbnds get things done at home bt may not tell how they get funds to pay this bill or that bill esp salary earners dt the pay is barley enof

DTs my point. any oda appendage you allude to wat I said. na you sabi

SmartyPants:
Some comments are not necessary. How can you say he probably had a side income as if you knew him personally? Then you even ascribed an imaginary figure of 100k to support your unreasonable evercise in speculation. Are you more or better informed than the family that has gotten to see even his payslip? Stop this bad behavior.

Or you think the sister saw a pay slip carrying #1million per mnt and she started crying? Even #500k pay is average. Not small.

SmartyPants:
Some comments are not necessary. How can you say he probably had a side income as if you knew him personally? Then you even ascribed an imaginary figure of 100k to support your unreasonable evercise in speculation. Are you more or better informed than the family that has gotten to see even his payslip? Stop this bad behavior.

mister, why are you crying more Dan the bereaved? why take it personal? Are you pained dt d man left this wicked world or your pained hearing dt the sister cried?

I am only responding to wat the poster said. since you choose to pick holes wit wat I said. Is there any tin wrong to have a side income?

the poster describe his earnings as low. The amt I mentioned is to add clarity to my gist. "For example means for example". I only use 100k as benchmark.

I know dt it 'is not the exact or right amount or pay he earns. if you understood English language very well, you shud know dt Its my opinion I. Am not talking wit certainty.

Evaress:
I'm an introvert and a writer, so I spend most of my time inside writing. I just moved into a new neighborhood.

When I moved in, my landlady introduced me to her brother when he came to visit. I greeted him politely.

Later, my landlady told me her brother had been talking about me. He said he didn't like that I was always alone and that I should try to come out and socialize more. Every time he visited her, he would ask about me.

I thought maybe I was being too distant, so I decided that next time he came, I would try to be more friendly and casual with him.

When he came again, I went out to greet him. I told him I heard he always asks about me. He said he was just concerned because I'm always indoors alone and he wanted me to have a friend. I smiled, thanked him, and i took his number promising to call him. I had planned to call him that week, but there was no power and my phone was dead.

He came again last Saturday to visit my landlady and after he finished talking to her. He came to my room. I let him inside. My house na small house o. No parlor inside. He asked why I didn't call him. I explained there was no light. Then he told me I should know that he likes me. He asked if I have a boyfriend, and I said yes. Then he asked me if we have sex. I told him I couldn't answer that. He said I was acting like a small girl.

Then he came closer and started touching my legs. I moved away. He said he loves tall girls. I kept begging him, "Please sir, I will call you, let's talk later." But he kept trying to touch me, and I kept dodging him, running to the other side of the room. Eventually, he left.

I went straight to my landlady and reported what happened. She said she was surprised to hear that and promised to warn him the next time he came.

He came again today. She confronted him about it, but he denied everything. Then he came to my room and knocked again. This time I refused to open the door. I pretended to be asleep until he left.

When I came out, my landlady told me he denied it all and asked me if I was sure I was telling the truth. Now he's making me look like a liar.

I know he will come to visit again on Sunday, and this time I'm ready to confront him. What should I do? This man is old enough to be my father.

".....you smiled. took his nos and promise to call him"

I fault you here. you are a tenant. A new one in dt compound. it's the agreement as regards ur rent btw you and ur landlady dt connects you in dt huz.

wat is " you took his nos and promise to call him". Are you a social welfare officer? Or a care giver for elderly people?

why would you open ur door and admit sm1 you barely know because he is related to ur landlady?

wat do you want to discuss or be discussin wit dt man?

just pray dt man doesn't poison his sister mind to start seeing you as a bad tenant.

men dey!!!
Do these ladies dt claim to be born again in christ truly have christian virtues? this shud be a church.

If you dissect dt response "men dey" you will agree dt we only go to church as routine activity not be be morally guided.

He probably had oda sources of income he was urgumenting wit his pay. The one the sister saw may be the pay frm his main job. likely a monthly salary pay job.

Let's assume his pay is 100k. no parent can comfortable sponsor 2 children in todays present day university with a salary of 100k. couple wit expenses at the home front.

the question is ? Would you the younger lover man be able to put her to check.

you may say you enjoy the surface connection you have wit her but can you stamp your feet and av a firm control over her .hope you will be the one driving the relationship giving it direction.

I mean to act manly as you the relationship go deeper wen conflict/confrontation pop up inside d usual relationship drama.

You know we the average Nigerians no dey use "dnt talk to me like dat. am I your mate" talk dey joke

Leemzyy:
One is the best,two is also okay, the other last two are for the weak and Male-centered ladies

they oda stages may not be dt they are for male centered ladies. the usual boyfriend and gfrnd stuff altered the sequence society expects them to follow.

I will give such people a thumps up because it's only a lady dt is determined to further her education after an unplanned pregnancy will get to dt level. They are the real MVP.

One paper and in the order of wat society expects, we will say as you said but the trajectory of life doesn't only obey 1 nor 2 either.

some dt pass tru the first step are divorced. probably lost their child/children tru one form of circumstance or the oda.

some dt followed the first two orders are yet to find fulfilment or get to their mark while the order 3 nd 4 av made up for the tym they didn't do wat it's expected of
them.

some dt pass tru the first order are yet to get a child or attain financial freedom while some dt pass tru the opposite pathway are established.

Irrespective the path life orders your step or makes you pass tru, just dnt allow dt situation hold you down. soar! soar again!! keep soaring!!!

solofresh, hope no be dt smallie wen dey give you attitude because of 20k turn you to Mr discovery so.

solofresh aka Mr mungo park.you say you discover a new mentality?.

Na cheating be your new discovery?

wen I see the title. I dey expect to read something like

" some gals for my area say dem wan go moon"

Or "some women for my area dey build huz for their inlaw"

Or is there something new you want to say oda Dan a gal placing anoda guy above you?

all these vices are partially the parents esp the absentee parent's but more on choices on the side of Dt child.

It is frnds dt lure you into it and it's your choice dt brought you in their midst.

some will want to argue and say children born into poor homes are the ones doing crime Dan the child born into wealth.

anybody can be a drug addict or an arm robber or rapist or confra or kidnapper or prostitute or lesbo or gay. Just name it.


shey we tink say diz guys carrying cocaine are frm poor homes. shey na poor man pikin wen neva chop belleful wan get connect to do drug biz.

Even at dt, he may once be poor bt his first hit will bring him out frm poverty. bt his continuous stay in dt biz is no longer due to poverty bt greed for more money which is base on choice.


as God gave us the power of choice so our parents.

There is an age you get to dt ur parents cant be policing you everywhere you go to.

They can only talk to you. After talking.... talking...and talking to you and you dnt take to corrections they let you be and leave you to face the music.

A lie sounds good to the ears. It excites and ignites curiosity. which makes one wnt to feel it or participate in the promise or expectation dt was made.

A lie activates your dopamine and dopamine as we know makes us feel good.

The truth is what everybody knows nd wat you know or keep hearing doesn't excite you. The truth doesn't ignite curiosity.

a smiling face wit a 24/7 sweet flattering mouth with little or no cash in ur account will get you plenty gals. They turn up ur room because you telling lies confidently mix wit small good act Inbtw and insincere talk makes dem feel good. The small good act is the bait.


a serious looking face wit honest/truthful mouth with loads of cash will not get you gals. They stay because you are their cash cow. Your 24/7 good nd honesty wen relating wit dem makes dem bored.

Milk is sweeter Dan water but they dnt see it dt way.

The sweet talking guy knows dt flattering dt gender is like giving water to fish. Dt is wat the sweet talking guy gives to dem.

While the honest guy assumes milk is sweeter so giving the fish milk makes the fish draw close to me.

The difference

The male gender flourish well in reality.

While the female gender flourish well in fantasy nd imagination.

It's a human nature thing. some men dnt really care if the wife or child leaves. same tin wit the female gender.

wat makes most persons irrespective of the gender afraid is not having a trusted person he can run to .

Call it A support system.

same thing wit the female gender.

A man may not feel the absence of his absent wife if he is surrounded by a trusted frnd, associates, acquaintances dt got his back.

Do you tink dos men dt the wife divorce nd left wit the child/children to an unknown location. Do you tink it bothers dem?

They get rattled for sometym after dt they pik up their jeans trouser and start living their life as if notin happened.

Most of those agberos in Lagos have children for a woman dt either the wife left dem or they left the woman .

They find solace and comfort in the midst of their fellow agberos at b/stop nd under the bridge drinking and smoking. Fellowshipping wit oda agberos is their own support system.


The person providing support is wat eliminates fear frm the mind of the oda dependent party.

your wifes fear is dt you dnt get broke or poor as her husband. DTS her fear.

support system is wat we all fear. Not really the presence per say.

Foodqueen:
Some people in the village are doing well than those in the city.

what metrics did you use to judge?

even in the supposed spectrum people want you to fit in, some oda grp of persons will still complain.

It is teens and young adults dt bother Abt oda people's opinion. older adults no give a hoot.

They say nd act how they feel in public without holding bk.

shebi na my chief security officer pikin com.visit his daddy for company. I ask the father say , na your pikin be this?

The man replied " na be born am..na this prick I take born". Holding his manhood to emphasize it.
If you like say the baba don spoil. na you sabi.




.

this one sef is an overkill. how many of diz young ladies dey see diz kind chicken dey chop?

Solofresh2:
There is this young lady who claimed to be 19 and am in my mid twenties.I have a girlfriend though.
So we used to chat on Whatsapp and telegram and I do reply her when am less busy.She claimed to like me, of which I am aware.You know.....if a lady likes you, you will know
So sometimes we tease each other, she likes dirty talks and flirts but am not taking her serious.If I wanted to have sex with her, I would have easily done that

So, last night one thing led to each other and I dare her to send her nude to me.To my greatest surprise, she did.

I didn't expect her to do that honestly

You are asking what's going on?

going on dt you saw her nude picture

or going on dt she is spoilt

or going on dt she agreed to send you her nude

Or your itching to hear fellow perverts right here lure you on to nack her


or going on dt what exactly?

ManirBK:
Fellow Nairalanders,

I want to share something personal that has changed my perspective on education and parenting.

It has become my duty to teach my children.

Every day, my children – who are in Nursery and Primary school – come home with homework in their books. And every day, I am the one who teaches them. Almost every single day, they return with two homework assignments, sometimes even three.

This responsibility has given me the confidence to become a better teacher. I've grown. I've learned. And I've discovered something surprising:

My children seem to understand me better than they understand their professional school teachers. They prefer when I teach them at home.

I don't know if this is because I'm their father, because I'm patient with them, or because I explain things in a way that makes sense to them. But it's working.

I'm open to any additional confidence, advice, or guidance you can offer.

If you're a parent who teaches your children at home, share your experience. If you're a teacher, I'd love to hear your perspective. If you're just here to learn, welcome.

Cc mynd44 oam4j lalasticlala seun nlfpmod fergie001 RoyalRoy

the truth is this, most parents pay school fees for the childs socializing wit their peers in sch not really for the knowledge..

the response a parent sending his 1yr 5mnts old to sch is dt " I want my child to be surrounded by his/ her peers so he/ she can learn". DTS the first statement you hear from dem not to learn.

som do it because they dnt AV the tym nd patient as you said you do av for your child.

How many teachers are well paid to be fully committed to transfer knowledge to kids these days..

Kip up wit the good work ur doin on your children.

Most wealthy people no go Tru all the way getting education in the four wall of a sch. They learnt outside the school building.

see how duper and elegant he now looks. am very sure the American code of conduct and etiquette don purge off this naija nigga off from street madness. A clear difference in outlook wen him dey naija.

ppogba:
You are not sure what their school handbook says or their rules.

The school uniform on dem doing dt content was wat nailed dem.

You don't wear your company or institutions uniform and be doing advert or content publicly without a clear permission frm your organization. No company or organization allows such.

For it to be outright expulsion. this act is a grave offence they breach and may likely be in their handbook .

They probably didn't read tru the rules nd regulations in the handbook wen it was handed to dem.

Or maybe they read it and brushed the consequence away say the sch no fit expel dem.

They all signed on receiving the handbook to abide by the rules. The school is in order.

They only implemented the agreement both parties signed.

Olaolar:
After misunderstanding since 5th may 2024
DAD called, we spoke, I tried to calm the situation down but he's angry at me wish am not at fault..
Since that date have been trying to reach his line he's not picking, I just go silent.. because am far from home not even is same state .. not to talk of going to see him physical

I just saw on saved number called me this year early October, it was a surprise DAD called , since two years now he remembered am still alive lol ,, I didn't show emotions, I just spoke to him as if nothing happens.. I even gist him about what's going on in my work place and activities.. hmmm'. We both laughed and he advised me in some things..

My problem is that why fathers use to be like this,,that's the least thing a mother can do..
Mother's will hardly gost his/her own biological child for just three months..

The incidence/ action,? YES! likely not your fault as you claim . it probably became your fault the way you presented the incidence to your father .

Tell us wetin you do dt good man before him go AWOL.